Still think the Civil War wasn’t fought over slavery? The Confederate states would disagree.

Was the Civil War fought over slavery or states’ rights? People love to debate this question, and many seem to believe it’s a matter of opinion. But the truth is there’s no debate to be had. We don’t have to conjecture. We know that the Confederate states’ primary motive was maintaining the right to enslave…

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Photo credit: Ryan Schultz/Creative CommonsArray

Was the Civil War fought over slavery or states’ rights? People love to debate this question, and many seem to believe it’s a matter of opinion.


But the truth is there’s no debate to be had. We don’t have to conjecture. We know that the Confederate states’ primary motive was maintaining the right to enslave black people because they said so themselves.

We have the primary documents that explain, in detail, why Confederates wanted to break off from the U.S., and they are eye-opening to say the least. Even those who already understand slavery to be the primary cause of the Civil War may be shocked to see how blatantly and proudly the Southern states announced their intention to defend white supremacy and their right to own black people.

MARCH 21, 1861 SPEECH BY VICE PRESIDENT OF THE CONFEDERACY, ALEXANDER STEPHENS

First let’s take a look at a speech given by Alexander Stephens, Vice President of the Confederacy, just a few weeks before the Civil War officially began. After describing some details of the Confederacy’s Constitution, Vice President Stephens stated that slavery was the “immediate cause” of the South’s “revolution.”

“But not to be tedious in enumerating the numerous changes for the better, allow me to allude to one other though last, not least. The new constitution has put at rest, forever, all the agitating questions relating to our peculiar institution, African slavery as it exists amongst us – the proper status of the negro in our form of civilization. This was the immediate cause of the late rupture and present revolution. Jefferson in his forecast, had anticipated this, as the ‘rock upon which the old Union would split.’ He was right. What was conjecture with him, is now a realized fact.”

I mean, he said it right there. Slavery of black people was the “immediate cause” of secession and the impending war.

But he didn’t stop there. No, he laid out the entire racist foundation of the new government in no uncertain terms.

The prevailing ideas entertained by him [Jefferson] and most of the leading statesmen at the time of the formation of the old constitution, were that the enslavement of the African was in violation of the laws of nature; that it was wrong in principle, socially, morally, and politically. It was an evil they knew not well how to deal with, but the general opinion of the men of that day was that, somehow or other in the order of Providence, the institution would be evanescent and pass away . . . Those ideas, however, were fundamentally wrong. They rested upon the assumption of the equality of races. This was an error. It was a sandy foundation, and the government built upon it fell when the ‘storm came and the wind blew.’

Our new government is founded upon exactly the opposite idea; its foundations are laid, its corner-stone rests, upon the great truth that the negro is not equal to the white man; that slavery—subordination to the superior race—is his natural and normal condition. This, our new government, is the first, in the history of the world, based upon this great physical, philosophical, and moral truth.”

Hmmm, so the South literally founded the Confederate government on the idea that slavery wasn’t just acceptable, but that black people were actually supposed to be enslaved. This was stated plainly and proudly.

Need a moment? Yeah, me too. Take a deep breath, because we’re just getting going here.

RELATED: This West Point colonel will tell you what the Civil War was really about.

Moving on, Stephens called the Northern abolitionists “fanatics,” saying, They assume that the negro is equal, and hence conclude that he is entitled to equal privileges and rights with the white man. If their premises were correct, their conclusions would be logical and just but their premise being wrong, their whole argument fails. . . .

There’s more.

With us, all of the white race, however high or low, rich or poor, are equal in the eye of the law. Not so with the negro. Subordination is his place. He, by nature, or by the curse against Canaan, is fitted for that condition which he occupies in our system.”

Stephens then went on to explain how God designed humanity so that one race would be subordinate to another, and that going against slavery is going against “the ordinance of the Creator.”

It seriously could not be more clear: The Confederates were proud white supremacists who wanted to build a country around that ideal.

Lest anyone argue that this was just one speech or just one man’s opinion, or that maybe Stephens didn’t speak for the whole Confederacy (despite being Vice President of it), let’s look at what the Confederate states themselves said.

DECLARATION OF THE CAUSES OF SECEDING STATES, 1861

In addition to the Ordinances of Secession announcing the departure of each of the Confederate states from the U.S., a handful of Southern states issued a Declaration of the Causes of Seceding States, explaining in detail why they felt they needed to leave the Union.

You can read the document in its entirety here, but let’s take a look at some highlights. (The first thing to note is that some iteration of the word “slave” appears 83 times in these declarations. So, yeah.)

GEORGIA

Right out of the gate, Georgia let everyone know that slavery is at the forefront of its concerns. The second sentence of their declaration reads:

For the last ten years we have had numerous and serious causes of complaint against our non-slave-holding confederate States with reference to the subject of African slavery.”

Okay then.

As we read through Georgia’s lengthy history lesson of how the states got to this point, it’s worth noting that they rarely referred to the “Northern” and “Southern” states. Instead, they referred to “non-slaveholding states” and “slave-holding states.” That alone ought to be a clue as to their motivations.

But if that’s not enough, here’s where Georgia stated that the Republican Party’s anti-slavery stance justified its decision to leave the Union.

A brief history of the rise, progress, and policy of anti-slavery and the political organization into whose hands the administration of the Federal Government has been committed will fully justify the pronounced verdict of the people of Georgia. The party of Lincoln, called the Republican party, under its present name and organization, is of recent origin. It is admitted to be an anti-slavery party. While it attracts to itself by its creed the scattered advocates of exploded political heresies, of condemned theories in political economy, the advocates of commercial restrictions, of protection, of special privileges, of waste and corruption in the administration of Government, anti-slavery is its mission and its purpose. By anti-slavery it is made a power in the state. The question of slavery was the great difficulty in the way of the formation of the Constitution.

While the subordination and the political and social inequality of the African race was fully conceded by all, it was plainly apparent that slavery would soon disappear from what are now the non-slave-holding States of the original thirteen.”

Finally, they summed up how racial equality and the prohibition of slavery, being the primary concern of the non-slaveholding states, was something they simply would not abide.

The prohibition of slavery in the Territories, hostility to it everywhere, the equality of the black and white races, disregard of all constitutional guarantees in its favor, were boldly proclaimed by its leaders and applauded by its followers.

With these principles on their banners and these utterances on their lips the majority of the people of the North demand that we shall receive them as our rulers.

The prohibition of slavery in the Territories is the cardinal principle of this organization.

For forty years this question has been considered and debated in the halls of Congress, before the people, by the press, and before the tribunals of justice. The majority of the people of the North in 1860 decided it in their own favor. We refuse to submit to that judgment, and in vindication of our refusal we offer the Constitution of our country and point to the total absence of any express power to exclude us.”

Thank you, Georgia, for clarifying your position.

MISSISSIPPI

Again, right out the gate, Mississippi told everyone that slavery is their main reason for seceding. Here’s how their declaration begins, no sentences skipped:

“In the momentous step which our State has taken of dissolving its connection with the government of which we so long formed a part, it is but just that we should declare the prominent reasons which have induced our course.

Our position is thoroughly identified with the institution of slavery—the greatest material interest of the world.”

Once they made that clear, they explained how they simply couldn’t live without slavery because black people were made to tend their crops.

“Its labor supplies the product which constitutes by far the largest and most important portions of commerce of the earth. These products are peculiar to the climate verging on the tropical regions, and by an imperious law of nature, none but the black race can bear exposure to the tropical sun. These products have become necessities of the world, and a blow at slavery is a blow at commerce and civilization. That blow has been long aimed at the institution, and was at the point of reaching its consummation. There was no choice left us but submission to the mandates of abolition, or a dissolution of the Union, whose principles had been subverted to work out our ruin. That we do not overstate the dangers to our institution, a reference to a few facts will sufficiently prove.”

Mississippi just stated that their only choices were to give up slavery or secede. And if that still seems unclear somehow, here are some of the “facts” they included for why they couldn’t stay in the Union:

“It has grown until it denies the right of property in slaves, and refuses protection to that right on the high seas, in the Territories, and wherever the government of the United States had jurisdiction.

“It refuses the admission of new slave States into the Union, and seeks to extinguish it by confining it within its present limits, denying the power of expansion.”

“It has nullified the Fugitive Slave Law in almost every free State in the Union, and has utterly broken the compact which our fathers pledged their faith to maintain.”

“It advocates negro equality, socially and politically, and promotes insurrection and incendiarism in our midst.”

“It has made combinations and formed associations to carry out its schemes of emancipation in the States and wherever else slavery exists.”

How can anyone say that the war wasn’t about slavery at this point?

SOUTH CAROLINA

South Carolina’s declaration started off sounding like it was all about “FREE AND INDEPENDENT STATES,” as they used that all-caps phrase repeatedly in recounting the history of why the colonies broke off from England. But when they got into their specific grievances with the Union, guess what they complained about. Yup, slavery.

The General Government, as the common agent, passed laws to carry into effect these stipulations of the States. For many years these laws were executed. But an increasing hostility on the part of the non-slaveholding States to the institution of slavery, has led to a disregard of their obligations, and the laws of the General Government have ceased to effect the objects of the Constitution.

They went on and on about non-slaveholding states trying to control their “property” and “institutions.” We could guess what they meant by that, but we don’t have to because they told us.

“Those States have assume [sic] the right of deciding upon the propriety of our domestic institutions; and have denied the rights of property established in fifteen of the States and recognized by the Constitution; they have denounced as sinful the institution of slavery; they have permitted open establishment among them of societies, whose avowed object is to disturb the peace and to eloign the property of the citizens of other States. They have encouraged and assisted thousands of our slaves to leave their homes; and those who remain, have been incited by emissaries, books and pictures to servile insurrection.

They even got specific about states that passed anti-slavery laws, which they claimed went against the Constitution.

“The State of New Jersey, at an early day, passed a law in conformity with her constitutional obligation; but the current of anti-slavery feeling has led her more recently to enact laws which render inoperative the remedies provided by her own law and by the laws of Congress. In the State of New York even the right of transit for a slave has been denied by her tribunals; and the States of Ohio and Iowa have refused to surrender to justice fugitives charged with murder, and with inciting servile insurrection in the State of Virginia. Thus the constituted compact has been deliberately broken and disregarded by the non-slaveholding States, and the consequence follows that South Carolina is released from her obligation.”

Again, South Carolina was clear that the North’s hostility toward slavery was what drove them to break away, thereby leading to war.

TEXAS

Ah, Texas. If you thought the deep south was the only place that gleefully celebrated the enslavement of black people, take a look at the Lone Star State’s declaration. It’s a doozy.

RELATED: A school assignment asked for 3 benefits of slavery. This kid gave the only good answer.

First, here’s how Texas described being accepted into the Confederacy:

“She [Texas] was received as a commonwealth holding, maintaining and protecting the institution known as negro slavery—the servitude of the African to the white race within her limits—a relation that had existed from the first settlement of her wilderness by the white race, and which her people intended should exist in all future time.

So, not only is white people enslaving black people fine and dandy—it’s a subjugation that should go on forever and ever. Got it.

“In all the non-slave-holding States, in violation of that good faith and comity which should exist between entirely distinct nations, the people have formed themselves into a great sectional party, now strong enough in numbers to control the affairs of each of those States, based upon an unnatural feeling of hostility to these Southern States and their beneficent and patriarchal system of African slavery, proclaiming the debasing doctrine of equality of all men, irrespective of race or color– a doctrine at war with nature, in opposition to the experience of mankind, and in violation of the plainest revelations of Divine Law. They demand the abolition of negro slavery throughout the confederacy, the recognition of political equality between the white and negro races, and avow their determination to press on their crusade against us, so long as a negro slave remains in these States.”

Sorry, I need to pause for a second. “Their beneficent and patriarchal system of African slavery”? And “the debasing doctrine of equality of all men”? The state of Texas said here that equality was not just unnatural but against God’s law. We all know that racism was the standard of the day, but I don’t think most of us were taught how deeply held these white supremacist beliefs were in the South’s own words.

And again, they weren’t done.

We hold as undeniable truths that the governments of the various States, and of the confederacy itself, were established exclusively by the white race, for themselves and their posterity; that the African race had no agency in their establishment; that they were rightfully held and regarded as an inferior and dependent race, and in that condition only could their existence in this country be rendered beneficial or tolerable.”

Still not done…

“That in this free government *all white men are and of right ought to be entitled to equal civil and political rights* [emphasis in the original]; that the servitude of the African race, as existing in these States, is mutually beneficial to both bond and free, and is abundantly authorized and justified by the experience of mankind, and the revealed will of the Almighty Creator, as recognized by all Christian nations

“Mutually beneficial to both bond and free.” Oh yes, those lucky slaves, living just as the Almighty intended.

If you wonder why people see the Confederate flag as a racist symbol, this is why. If you wonder why honoring the leaders of the Confederacy with monuments and holidays is horrifically problematic, this is why.

We have it straight from the Confederates’ mouths. The Civil War was fought because the South wanted the right to keep slavery and the North wanted to abolish it. People can say it was about states’ rights, but it’s disingenuous to omit the primary moral, political, and economic right the South was fighting to maintain—the legal and systematic subjugation and enslavement of black people.

They seriously could not have been any clearer about it.

  • A homeless man returns a pet dog’s stolen ashes to their owner. It’s changing his life.
    Photo credit: Kathryn Michie via GoFundMeKathryn Michie and Chris Engdahl, left, and a flyer.

    When Holly and Brandon Dunn’s car was broken into, the stolen items were ones they thought they’d never get back. The thief took a bag containing the ashes of their late chihuahua named Tia. The thief also took Tia’s ceramic paw prints and a memorial stuffed-animal replica of the beloved pup. Two weeks later, the items were found and returned. Now the Seattle community is chipping in to reward the hero with a fresh start.

    Brandon explained to KING-TV that the couple was unable to have children, so Tia had been their furry kid throughout their 20-year relationship.

    “It’s a bit cliche, I guess, comparing a dog to a child. But, you know, for us that was my child,” he said.

    The search was on

    The Dunns put up flyers offering a reward for the return of the ashes and memorial items. Folks on social media and Reddit offered to help search and put up additional flyers in the Seattle area. There were even people willing to 3D-print a replica of Tia’s paw prints to replace the original ones.

    A hero reaches out

    Two weeks later, the unlikely happened. The items were found and returned by a homeless man named Chris Engdahl.

    For the past seven years, Engdahl had been living unhoused in the Seattle area. He made a living off what he could find and sell from dumpsters. It was in a random dumpster that Engdahl found Tia’s ashes, paw prints, and stuffed replica. Engdahl knew the items had sentimental value and held onto them in hopes of finding their owner. After seeing one of the flyers, Engdahl texted Brandon’s phone number and made sure the Dunns got Tia’s remains back.

    The Seattle community chips in

    Engdahl didn’t want a reward from the couple and was just happy that a fellow dog lover got their precious memorial items back. The Dunns had already moved out of the state. However, they and the Seattle community still wanted to do something to help Engdahl.

    Kathryn Michie, a person who helped post flyers for the Dunns, started a GoFundMe for Engdahl to help restart his life. As of this writing, Engdahl has recently moved into his first apartment, and the GoFundMe has raised more than $6,700. The money will be used to help Engdahl get furniture and other supplies. Some of the money will also go toward food for his new dog, Reo, whom he recently rescued from the street. Altogether, it will help Engdahl’s new place feel more like home.

    “I just got off the phone with Chris and he’s absolutely floored with the support from this community!” Michie wrote in a May 6 update on the GoFundMe page. “Thank you to everyone who is changing his life for the better. He is such an angel and deserves all the help!”

    Kindness and support from an entire community helped recover lost items, house someone in need, and create a new life for a dog, too.

  • Woman tests drive-thru barista by tipping him $1 for every second he listens to daughter’s story
    Photo credit: Martina and Alexa/InstagramA mother-daughter duo shares a nice tip with a Starbucks barista.
    ,

    Woman tests drive-thru barista by tipping him $1 for every second he listens to daughter’s story

    “Every second they listen, the tip goes up $1. They don’t know that.”

    Imagine passing a test with flying colors when you didn’t even know you were taking one. A mother-daughter duo, known as Martina and Alexa, visits fast-food and coffeehouse drive-thrus. The person serving them is then, in a sense, given a test of their kindness, often revealing the most wholesome side of humanity.

    The way it works is this: The mother-daughter duo purchases food and drinks at drive-thrus such as Starbucks, Carl’s Jr., and Wendy’s. When they’re given their items, the daughter begins telling a story. As explained in the videos, “Every second they listen, the tip goes up $1. They don’t know that.”

    One video stands out

    They have many fun examples on TikTok and Instagram. But one recently truly stood out.

    A blond man appears in the Starbucks drive-thru window, cheerfully greeting the pair. “Hi! Here we are!” While the mother counts out one-dollar bills on her lap, her daughter, sporting bright red long hair, begins telling a story with the most adorable uptick: “One time at school? We had a science project about health? And I went up there? And like I talked for five minutes about how sugar was bad for you?”

    While the story goes on, the barista smiles warmly and occasionally says, “Right, uh huh,” to keep her at ease. She continues: “But on the actual day? After school, I went and I bought a donut? To test if sugar is bad for you. So yeah. Because I can’t present information without data and all of that, so yeah. Also, I have a snake at home? She’s a ball python? And she’s so cute. Her name is Frosty!”

    The barista enthusiastically asks, “Really?” She continues, “Yeah, and sometimes she likes her tank.” At this point, Mom cuts her off, and the barista hands over a drink. “Can I give you a tip?” she asks while handing him $30. “Oh my gosh! Thank you. Are you sure?”

    The whole exchange exemplifies pure kindness. But it gets even better. Turns out the barista is Dale B. Pirofsky. And there was something about him they just couldn’t forget, nor could the viewers who saw the video.

    The duo behind the videos thought they’d pay his kindness forward not just with a big tip, but with the hope of helping him raise money for a car. They started a GoFundMe, where they shared:

    “When we met Dale, there was something about him that immediately stood out – his kindness, his warmth, his humor, and the kind of positive energy that you can feel right away. He truly has one of those bright souls that makes people smile without even trying.

    After we shared the video, Dale became a favorite across social media in just a few days. It has been so special to see how many people connected with him through the screen. So many of you saw exactly what we saw in person – his genuine heart, his sweet personality, and the joy he brings into a simple moment.

    Many people reached out asking how they could support him financially, so we contacted Dale directly. After speaking with him and getting his permission, we decided to create this GoFundMe in his name. Dale shared with us that he has been working two jobs to save up for his very first car. This fundraiser is not an emergency request – it is simply a way for anyone who feels moved by Dale’s story to support a goal he has already been working so hard toward.”

    “Everyone deserves to be heard”

    Upworthy had the chance to chat with Dale, who shared how grateful he was for the whole encounter.

    When asked what he thought when she started telling the story, he said he was happy to listen. “Whenever someone wants to talk to me, especially children, I always try to listen,” he said. “I grew up—and honestly still struggle—with feeling unheard or unacknowledged, so I always try to make someone who needs to chat feel heard.”

    He didn’t suspect it was a test or a prank. “Honestly? I probably would have should the context of the story been something less engaging!” he said. “But considering she was talking about her school project, I figured it was something she was super proud of! Everyone deserves to be heard about what they are enthusiastic about.”

    This has been his biggest tip so far. “As a barista, the thirty-dollar tip definitely takes the cake!” he said. “Although, I did have to share it with my fellow baristas, and I’m in no way, shape, or form unhappy about that. My coworkers have been nothing but supportive of me, and they totally deserved a little something!”

    As for the duo, they remain rather mysterious. But what he does know is how good they made him feel. “They are a family of sweet-hearted people,” he said. “This family has absolutely turned my life upside down over the last week, and I am so grateful for all the support I’ve been given! It’s nice to see my enthusiasm and smile have made so many people so happy. It’s a dream of mine I can finally say I’ve achieved.”

  • Dad stuns bride with a recording of her accurately describing her future wedding at 4 years old
    Photo credit: CanvaSome weddings are full of surprises.

    Lots of kids imagine their wedding day when they are little in all kinds of creative ways. But few have those childhood imaginings recorded, and even fewer have them unearthed on their actual wedding day.

    But one bride was surprised by just that at her own wedding reception, and in the absolute sweetest way. During the father-daughter dance, as the Beach Boys crooned out “God Only Knows,” suddenly a man’s voice came over the speaker. “Tell me about your wedding,” it said.

    A child’s voice responded: “My wedding is gonna have clowns dancing with the children, and a moon bounce, and face painting…when the brides all change into costumes, they go in the moon bounce.”

    @jordannrose1

    I could not stop crying!! 🥹🤍full backstory: my parents found a video from when I was 4 years old talking shout my future wedding, where I named my childhood friends as my bridesmaids that were in attendance, and said Max would be my husband…. While I didn’t meet Max until college it was kismet!! They edited that clip into our father daughter dance and totally surprised everyone including me!!! ❤️ #fatherdaughterdance #wedding #bride #2026bride #2026wedding @absocialstudio

    ♬ original sound – jordan

    The child was Jordan, the bride, at four years old, and the man’s voice was her dad.

    “Who are the brides gonna be?” preschooler Jordan’s dad asked.

    “The brides are gonna be silly princesses,” Jordan responded. She said they would be named Gracie, Rachel, Kelly (or Ketti?), and Sarah.

    “And what about the princes?” her dad asked. “Who are the princes going to be?”

    “Oh, you mean all the boys?” little Jordan asked. “They’re gonna be silly superheroes!”

    wedding, marriage, flower girl
    Little girl dressed up for a wedding. Photo credit: Canva

    But when Dad asked who they were, no one expected her little voice to cry out, “Max! Max! Max!”

    Max, Jordan’s real-life adult groom, who was listening to all of this, was gobsmacked—as in full-on, wide-eyed, jaw-to-the-floor shocked. Jordan herself was blown away.

    “No way!” Max said. “No way. No way!”

    Jordan wrote the backstory in the TikTok caption: “My parents found a video from when I was 4 years old talking about my future wedding, where I named my childhood friends as my bridesmaids that were in attendance, and said Max would be my husband…. While I didn’t meet Max until college it was kismet!! They edited that clip into our father-daughter dance and totally surprised everyone including me!!!”

    @jordannrose1

    5.2.26 🤍💍🤵🏼👰🏻‍♀️🥂 married my best friend! wedding content by the amazing @absocialstudio #wedding #bride #2026bride #2026wedding #lajolla

    ♬ original sound – jordan

    People loved the clever, creative weaving of the audio into the father-daughter dance. And of course, commenters adored the groom’s stunned reaction:

    “You just KNOW your dad has been planning that since the moment you said ‘Dad, this is Max.’”

    “Just sobbing over a girl who manifested her entire life without knowing it.”

    “This is the most beautiful invisible string story I’ve ever heard of.”

    “The fact your husband was crying before he even heard his name said… a REAL one!! Congratulations!”

    “I am BAWLING RIGHT NOW. literally the definition of ‘in every lifetime.’”

    Of all the uses of childhood videos at a wedding, this one might be the most creative and meaningful yet. Congratulations to the adorable couple, who were so clearly meant for one another.

    You can follow Jordan on TikTok.

  • Family of 7 takes in 82-year-old widower neighbor as their new ‘grandpa’
    Photo credit: via USA Today Paul Callahan, 82, with the Caraballo family.
    ,

    Family of 7 takes in 82-year-old widower neighbor as their new ‘grandpa’

    “You get many chances to talk to people. If you don’t take a chance, you may miss a friend.”

    In 2022, the Caraballo family welcomed a new member: their neighbor from across the street, Paul Callahan, who was 82 at the time. Callahan, a widower, lost his wife prior to the Caraballos moving in. It makes sense their new neighbor was feeling lonely, but a beautiful friendship was on the way. After their initial meeting, Callahan quickly became like a grandfather to the Caraballos, a family of seven, and the story went viral. Various publications and news outlets covered the heartwarming blended family and they were even invited to appear on Good Morning America and The Kelly Clarkson Show.

    South West News Service first reported the whole story, writing that when Sharaine, then 32, and Wilson Caraballo, then 42, moved their family of seven into a new home in Pawtucket, Rhode Island in 2022, they weren’t sure how they’d be received. “Our biggest fear moving into a new neighborhood was, ‘What if our neighbors don’t like us?’ What if, because we have a lot of kids, they make a lot of noise and we come from a big family, so what if there’s any conflict with the neighbors?” Sharaine told USA Today. “We’re the only Black family in our neighborhood.”

    Then their neighbor showed up with a ladder

    But all that fear quickly dissipated when their new neighbor, Callahan, showed up with a ladder and offered to help the family spruce up their new home.

    “He was coming over with tools. He’d bring screwdrivers and teach Wilson how to fix up the garage, and Wilson followed all his advice,” Sharaine told South West News Service. The octogenarian soon became a fixture at the Caraballo house. Now, Callahan stops by nearly every day and can always be found at the family’s cookouts, gatherings, and holidays.

    He’s not the neighbor anymore, he’s family

    Callahan has become a great friend to the family’s children, whom he entertains with stories from his past. “The kids run up to him like that’s their grandfather,” Sharaine said. “Paul is definitely a family member. He’s no longer considered a neighbor.”

    Callahan believes that it’s all about taking the time to be friendly.

    “You get many chances to talk to people. If you don’t take a chance, you may miss a friend,” Callahan said. “It doesn’t hurt to be nice. That’s the other thing, it costs you nothing, but a lot of times, you get a better return.”

    The story went viral, and for good reason

    Sharaine keeps her well-wishers updated on the doings of her family, including Callahan, on her Instagram page. Though she hasn’t posted about Callahan specifically since their mini media storm, she keeps posts about their story and media appearance pinned to the top of her page for all to see.

    This article originally appeared three years ago.

  • An errant pitch hit a Little League player in the head. His response was peak sportsmanship.
    Photo credit: CanvaA viral video from a Little League game has people celebrating good sportsmanship.

    Youth sports have gotten more intensely competitive, to the point where overeager parents and coaches have to regularly be reminded to take it down a notch. So when humanity takes precedence over team rivalries, it’s extra heartwarming.

    And considering how many “kids these days” laments we see coming from older generations, it’s also heartening to see kids showing excellent character qualities when no one directly asked them to.

    A viral video from a Little League baseball game is giving us a nice dose of both—good sportsmanship and basic human kindness from two players from opposing teams.

    As reported by USA Today, Isaiah (Zay) Jarvis, a batter from Oklahoma, took a pitch from Texas East pitcher Kaiden Shelton right to the side of his helmet. It was a hard blow that caused Jarvis to spin around and crumble to the ground, grabbing his head. The replay in slow motion shows that the ball basically just knocked his helmet off, though it was undoubtedly jarring and probably painful as well.

    Jarvis was able to continue playing, but Shelton was shaken up. No matter how fierce the competition, no one wants to be responsible for injuring another person. He was visibly upset on the mound, so Jarvis left first base and approached him.

    Here is what actually happened on that field

    That a kid this age would approach a player who hit him with a ball and comfort him with a hug, especially knowing that all eyes were on him, is just so lovely. Someone raised this young man to put people’s feelings ahead of competitiveness and not worry about what others might think.

    And the fact that the pitcher was so distraught at the possibility of having hurt someone is also so sweet. This was a moment that showed the true character of both of these boys, and both of them exemplified caring and compassion.

    The internet was moved to tears

    People praised the boys’ empathy and humanity.

    Both of those boys are what you want your kids to aspire to,” wrote one commenter. “One willing to forgive and knows it wasn’t intentional and the other showing remorse and sorrow. I love it!!”

    Thankfully, these kids aren’t some one-off anomaly. We see examples of kindness and empathy all the time in sports. Despite how fierce competition can get, enjoyment of the game and the self-improvement on all levels that comes with playing is what it’s all about, and many coaches and parents strive to make sure that their kids are learning all of those lessons.

    This video demonstrates even more than simple respect for an opponent. It shows that this kid recognized his opponent’s humanity first and foremost. He didn’t just say, “It’s no problem.” He recognized that the pitcher had feelings of his own and wanted to make surehe was okay. That’s a whole other level of sportsmanship to strive for, one that takes nothing away from strong competition and doing your best to win.

    This went beyond good sportsmanship

    The moment has had a lasting impact on both boys. In a follow-up by ESPN, Jarvis reflected, “I don’t think it’s changed me, but it’s changed my lifestyle. People know me, and so I always need to be doing the right thing.” The two became friends, and their story is now held up as a symbol of what youth sports should look like.

    Many adults could even learn from the emotionally intelligent and empathetic interaction of these two kids. Good sportsmanship all around. Love to see it. Big kudos to these kiddos and whoever raised them.

    This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.

  • The empowering advice Eleanor Roosevelt shared for anyone struggling with self-worth and confidence
    Photo credit: WikipediaEleanor Roosevelt shared her insights on building self-worth and confidence.

    Eleanor Roosevelt lived a one-of-a-kind life that included her role as first lady of the United States. Born in 1884, she became a prominent figure in American politics and culture.

    She was also a prolific writer and penned a syndicated newspaper column called “My Day” six days a week from 1935 until her death in 1962.

    In it, she shared the wisdom and advice she had gathered throughout her life. In one column from 1943, Roosevelt offered her confidence-building advice:

    “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

    Roosevelt’s insightful wisdom centers on separating self-worth from the opinions and perceptions of others and instead turning inward to find value and confidence. Her advice came years after surviving a traumatic childhood and undergoing her own self-discovery.

    Roosevelt’s personal struggle with confidence

    Roosevelt had a tumultuous upbringing. Her mother died of diphtheria when she was only eight years old, and less than two years later, her father died due to depression and alcoholism. She was orphaned by age 10, and Roosevelt’s grandmother, Mary Hall, became her guardian.

    Roosevelt also grew up feeling self-conscious about her appearance and serious demeanor, according to a short biography published by The George Washington University’s Eleanor Roosevelt Papers Project.

    She was given many nicknames, including “Granny,” “very plain,” and “old-fashioned.” Roosevelt once wrote, “I was a solemn child without beauty. I seemed like a little old woman entirely lacking in the spontaneous joy and mirth of youth.”

    Despite these challenges, Roosevelt found her sense of worth and confidence through education. Her grandmother sent her overseas in 1899, when she was 15, to attend Allenswood Academy in London. It was there that she discovered her gift for forming friendships and her love of learning.

    In her autobiography, Roosevelt wrote that she developed “confidence and independence,” adding that she was “totally without fear in this new phase of my life.”

    Roosevelt also wrote about battling people-pleasing. “I was always afraid of something: of the dark, of displeasing people, of failure. Anything I accomplished had to be done across a barrier of fear,” she wrote.

    @jayshetty

    What idea are you discussing today? Elenor Roosvelt’s quote is worth remembering

    ♬ original sound – Jay Shetty

    Tips for building self-worth and confidence

    Building confidence and self-worth is a difficult process that may require intentional effort. Zack Goldman, a psychotherapist and founder of Solid Ground Psychotherapy, shares three helpful tips for anyone struggling with feelings of inferiority:

    Stop treating confidence like a prerequisite for action

    Goldman explains that one of the biggest misconceptions about confidence is that people think they need to feel confident before doing something difficult.

    “In reality, confidence is usually built afterward through repeated experiences of taking action despite discomfort,” he told Upworthy. “Start with small, manageable risks because every time you prove to yourself that you can tolerate uncertainty, rejection, or imperfection, yourself trust grows.”

    Pay attention to how you speak to yourself during difficult moments

    “Many people unknowingly reinforce low self-worth through constant self-criticism, especially when they make mistakes or feel emotionally overwhelmed,” Goldman said.

    He explains that instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me?” try asking, “What would I say to someone I care about in this situation?”

    “Learning to respond to yourself with more fairness and compassion helps create a more stable sense of worth that is not dependent on constant achievement or external validation,” he added.

    Build a life that reflects your values, not just other people’s expectations

    According to Goldman, people often lose confidence when they spend too much time trying to meet standards that do not actually align with who they are.

    “Self-worth becomes much stronger when your decisions, relationships, and goals reflect your own values rather than approval seeking,” he said. “Even small choices that move you toward a more authentic version of yourself can create a deeper sense of confidence and internal stability over time.”

  • 20 years ago his BBC interview became a viral comedy hit. Now, he’s sharing his secret to staying calm.
    Photo credit: BBC News/YouTubeGuy Goma realizing he’s in the wrong interview, circa 2006.

    Since his accidental 15 minutes of fame in 2006, Guy Goma has been the epitome of keeping calm under pressure.

    The video—in which Goma showed up for a job interview at the BBC and was mistaken for, quite literally, another Guy (technology journalist Guy Kewney)—has gone viral time and time again, thanks in no small part to how well Goma handled the situation after being thrust into a live on-air interview.

    Now, two decades after the wholesome snafu, Goma has decided to impart some wisdom about turning a potentially catastrophic moment into one of pure grace.

    To be fair, Goma admits he wasn’t stoic the entire time

    Speaking to This Morning, Goma said his initial thoughts were, “God help me. I’m lost completely.”

    However, he remembered the words of his mother, who taught him to quietly fix a problem without embarrassing anyone.

    “My mom always says to us, ‘If you notice something, your brother made a mistake anywhere, correct the mistake first before talking to the person,’” he said.

    Not wanting to make anyone else feel uncomfortable, Goma held onto his composure. That was all the fuel he needed to carry on, answering the questions placed before him with such admirable self-possession that viewers still revisit the clip time and time again. Sure, it’s partly for a good laugh, but also because Goma’s chutzpah is undeniably inspiring.

    The hidden Zen wisdom behind all this

    Nearly all of us have experienced a situation where we felt unprepared, overwhelmed, or suddenly put on the spot (if you haven’t, your time is coming). Goma’s response offers a blueprint for surviving those moments with dignity intact. In similarly anxiety-inducing situations, we can direct our attention outside ourselves and aim to simply be of service in whatever way we can muster in the moment, rather than laser-focusing on what we’re experiencing internally. When that happens—when we forego our concept of “I,” as Buddhists say—what once felt insurmountable often suddenly shrinks to its proper size.

    There’s also something to be said for the fact that Goma never appeared bitter about the misunderstanding that made him Internet-famous. Even not getting the job he originally came to interview for, which he shared was heartbreaking at the time, didn’t ultimately defeat his spirit. Over the years, he has retained his humor and warmth, which has only deepened people’s affection for him.

    Life after becoming Internet-famous

    According to Newstalk, Goma now works with people who have learning disabilities. It might not be the job he planned for all those years ago, but it sounds like he’s found work with purpose nonetheless. He also teamed up with Elliott Gotkine, the BBC producer who put him on the air, to release their story in book form as The Wrong Guy: The Inside Story of TV’s Greatest Cock-Up.

    Though we may never find ourselves accidentally talking shop on live television, may we all handle our own unexpected blunders with that same humility and humor. Who’s to say what surprising blessings might come as a result?

  • A trans man beautifully harmonizes to the song ‘Kiss Me’ alongside a 2018 clip of himself
    Photo credit: Dylan HollowayDylan Holloway shares a side-by-side clip with his former self before transitioning.

    British singer-songwriter Dylan Holloway, who performs as Dylan and the Moon, has been wowing audiences with his voice for quite some time. But what makes Holloway especially unique is that he also charmed crowds before identifying as male. While Holloway had long wrestled with his gender identity, he transitioned from female to male during the COVID-19 pandemic. While some might say they never look back, Holloway chooses to look back with love and gratitude for his former self.

    In a recent clip posted to Holloway’s Instagram page, he shows his followers a split screen. On the left is Dylan presenting as female, with blonde curls and soprano notes. That side is labeled “2018.” On the right is modern-day Dylan, now presenting as male, shirtless and tattooed, marked “2026.” To the song “Kiss Me,” he harmonizes with his former self, and it’s absolutely pitch-perfect.

    “A duet with my past self”

    At the top of the clip, he writes, “Singing with my past self…trans duet.” Holloway adds in the comments:

    “A duet with my past self. I make these videos because it brings me joy to embrace my entire journey & it helps me spread love to others who may wish to do the same… I’m proud of who I am & the unique art I can make because of it … whoever you are, whatever your journey, you are wonderful & deserve love for your whole self too.”

    Fans in the comment section were equally loving and seemingly in awe:

    “You were and are a beautiful person, with a lot of charisma, musically and a beautiful voice. In both interpretations. Gifted! I’m impressed.”

    “I see a talented musician who is proud of his story and who loves himself, as he should.”

    Sixpence None the Richer

    As for the song? The year was 1998. The band Sixpence None the Richer had taken American radio stations by storm with their sweet, melodic single “Kiss Me” from their self-titled album, released a year earlier. Its lyrics are pretty straightforward, though some could call them a tad bossy. The singer would like a gentleman to kiss her “behind the bearded barley. Nightly, behind the green, green grass. Swing, swing. Swing the spinning step. You’ll wear those shoes and I will wear that dress.” Holloway nails every note.

    @dylanandthemoon

    The X Factor (lol) 11 years & 1 transition later 🏳️‍⚧️ 😂 #xfactor #transition #transgender #transman before and after

    ♬ original sound – DylanAndTheMoon

    Obvious X Factor

    Back in 2012, Holloway became a sensation while competing on Britain’s The X Factor, where he ended up as a finalist in a band called MK1. More recently, he compiled clips from the show featuring his former self singing beautifully then and just as purely now as a man.

    In an interview with DIVA Magazine, Holloway described his time on the show:

    “MK1 ended up at the finals on national television, which was such a turning point in my life. Until then I had just been a little androgynous kid from Newquay with a secret inside me, and now I was a rapper in an urban band on telly. But everyone knew me as someone I wasn’t, and I felt like a caricature of myself. Eventually, after a few years, these feelings bubbled to the surface and I couldn’t continue to be this person everyone thought I was, so I drifted and started releasing my own music under the name Lots Holloway.”

    Compassion and love

    When asked what it’s like singing with his former self, Holloway seemed to feel at peace:

    “It’s actually such a wonderful experience to look at them now. I think a lot of transgender people find there’s a pressure, whether they put that on themselves or it is external pressure, to eliminate the person you once were when you become someone new. Now I’m the person I am today, I look back at old footage of myself with this new compassion and love. I wouldn’t be here right now if it wasn’t for that brave, resilient, and bold soul that was brave enough to come out.”

    Alongside his career as a musician, Holloway also speaks professionally about mental health advocacy and LGBTQ rights. On the Raise the Bar website, where he is listed as one of its motivational speakers, the organization shares the importance of these side-by-side videos: “In posting these videos, he spreads the message that it is okay to accept your old self, as it is all part of the journey that makes you who you are now.”

    Upworthy spoke with Holloway, who shared how he feels about transitioning and music in general.

    “For awhile, I thought I had to leave that version of myself behind. But over time, I realised there was something really beautiful about letting both versions of me exist together,” he said. “So instead of erasing my past, I started creating duets with old vocal recordings and videos I had. Almost like having a conversation across time with younger me. So healing. How many people ever have that opportunity? I want other people to know it’s okay to embrace who you are – the whole story.”

    He says his favorite duet so far is “Yellow” by Coldplay.

    “This song came out when I was growing up and confused about myself,” he said. “I recorded it on a rooftop in 2018. Then went back to the same place in 2026 to film again, totally free and transitioned. And the merging of those two people together, to me, is beautiful. I love how the lyrics mean something totally different in this context. ‘Your skin and bones turn into something beautiful. I swam across. I jumped across for you. You know I love you so.’ All of it.”

    He added, “My dream is that Coldplay will see it and see how much their song helped heal me. And one day, we will play it together with the old version of me projected behind us to sing it too. In a huge stadium, of course. I want to spread the message of acceptance and love as far as we can.”

    “Traditional songwriting” is where he draws most of his influence: “People who tell stories. People who write to move others. Dolly Parton, David Bowie, Coldplay, Paul Simon, Tracy Chapman. Iconic.”

    He plans to keep telling those stories.

    “I’m a totally independent artist, and this year, I’m creating an album in public and allowing my fans to make decisions along the way,” he said. “I make one bit of content a day and release one song a month. Eventually, it will all come together into an album. And my fans will know they helped bring it to life. So everyone is welcome to come and get involved!”

    Holloway is also releasing a documentary later this year that shares more of his story. “It shows an up close and personal journey of my transition from the lens of being a singer who risked losing their voice,” he said.

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