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Mel Robbins giving a TEDx speech.

One of the most disappointing aspects of life is that, at some point, everyone close to you will eventually let you down or fall short of your expectations. Some have slip-ups and fall short of what you'd expect, and some consistently let you down your entire life.

It can be deflating when people don’t show up when you need them, especially if you have been there for them. When you need people and they don’t show up, it feels like you’re carrying a burden that you can never get off your back. That’s why Mel Robbins’ two-word “Let them” theory is so powerful. It liberates you from constantly feeling controlled by those who let you down.

What is the ‘Let them’ theory?

Mel Robbins is a podcast host, author, motivational speaker, former lawyer, and author of The Let Them Theory. In the TikTok video below, she explains how allowing people to be themselves gives you the power to improve the things you can control, instead of suffering in the same cycle of expectations and disappointments.

@melrobbins

People can only meet you as far as they've met themselves... and a lot of them haven't done the work. Listen to The Let Them Theory, narrated by yours truly, only on @audible 💚 #melrobbins #letthem #letthemtheory People can only meet you as far as they've met themselves... and a lot of them haven't done the work. Listen to The Let Them Theory, narrated by yours truly, only on @Audible 💚 #melrobbins #letthem #letthemtheory

The “Let them” practice begins by acknowledging that others are imperfect and we cannot change them. “People can only meet you as deeply as they've met themselves. Most people haven't gone to therapy, they haven't looked at their issues, and frankly, they don't want to. Let them. Let your parents be less than what you deserved," she opens the video. "Let your family life be something that isn't a fairy tale. Try to remind yourself that they're just doing the best they can with the resources and the life experiences they have."

mel robbins, motivation expert, mel robbins podcast, let them theory, microphoneMotivation expert Mel Robbins.Photo © Cody OLoughlin (PR Photo)

While it can be hard to admit that some of the most important people in your life will never turn things around to your satisfaction, accepting that reality is the most empowering thing you can do for yourself. “But here's the important part,” Robbins continues. “Now that you know the 'Let them' theory, you get to choose what happens moving forward, because you're gonna focus on what you can control, which is what you say, what you do, what you value, and what energy you bring to the relationship.”

Put simply: Now that you allow them to be who they are, you can act accordingly. You can stop carrying the weight of unmet expectations.

What is the locus of control?

Robbins’ theory is a simple way of understanding the locus of control psychological concept. The locus of control is the extent to which we believe we have control over our own lives. When our actions, thoughts, and feelings are contingent on events (and people) outside of our control, we have an external locus of control. The healthy thing is to revert that to an internal locus of control, where we believe we control the outcomes of our actions. Those with an internal locus of control tend to be less influenced by others, work hard to get what they want, and report being happier, and more independent.

mel robbins, motivation expert, mel robbins podcast, let them theory, psychologyMotivation expert Mel Robbins.Photo via © Tony Luong (PR Photo)

“The only person you can change is you,” Robbins says at the end of her video. "When you say ‘Let them,’ you see your family exactly as they are, perhaps for the very first time in your life. They're human. You have no control over what's happened. You have no control over who they are. You can only control what you do from this point forward. Accepting the reality of your situation doesn't mean you're surrendering to it. Instead, it's about reclaiming your power to shape your future.”

Now that you’ve taken control of your future, what are you going to do with it?

Pop Culture

Millennials predict what other things they will witness in their lifetime

From AI therapists to widespread 4-day workweeks, the future holds so many possibilities.

Buckle up.

Millennials have witnessed a lot in their time. Some of these events have been positive, like a decrease in the gender pay gap, more LGBTQ rights and sweeping technological advancements that, despite their flaws, do provide unprecedented access to information and resources.

On the other hand, the slew of economic crises, pandemics, natural disasters and tragedies incited by gun violence make it easy to see why this group is labeled “the unluckiest generation.”

And since change continues at an ever increasing rate, who’s to say what life will look like in 50 or even 10 years time?


Recently, someone on Ask Reddit posed the question:

“Millennials, what do you think we're gonna possibly see in our lifetime?”

The general consensus was certainly a mixed bag. Below are some of the answers that stood out.

Many predicted massive, not-so-great shifts as a direct result of global warming and climate change.

global warming, climate changePhoto of a forest firePhoto credit: Canva

Or as physicistdeluxe put it, “lots of heat and weird weather.”

“I live north of Seattle and have for all my life…Snow would stick around for a few days and we'd have multiple snow days. Now snow dumps once or twice, if that, and is gone by mid-day. Used to go camping before school started and we'd be able to have a campfire. Can't do that anymore as burn bans start in early July. Snow in the mountains all year round. Not anymore.” —Hungrypotato19

A911owner seconded:

“I live in the northeast; I'm convinced we're less than 10 years away from having our first winter where —-we don't get any snow. The last few years have seen very little and it melts quickly. “

Only a slightly brighter note, quite a few expected to see impactful medical advancements, especially thanks to gene therapy.

crispr, medical techFinger pointing at futuristic medical hologramPhoto credit: Canva

Fulcrum87 anticipated a “cure for cystic fibrosis” in a couple of decades, while miss_kimba and others counted on “cancers and systemic diseases” being eliminated.

On the same front, UnluckyCustard8130 “guaranteed” that there would be an equal uptick in “designer” babies. While someone else theorized that “AI therapists” would become mainstream.

Meanwhile, someone else just hoped for “universal healthcare including dental 😭.”

Speaking of healthcare, PracticalCows (and others) stated that this generation would witness “our healthcare system collapsing when all the Baby Boomers need end of life care at the same time.”

“This will be what creates the final push for universal healthcare. The only generation who opposes it in large numbers will be the ones who need it most,” said BillionaireGhost.

Millennials agree that the future workplace will also likely continue to change at a rapid pace, and in a way that provides more work-life balance.

workplace, 4 day work weekPhoto of a group of coworkers with laptopsPhoto credit: Canva

“With luck, widespread adoption of the 4-day work week,” declared Certain-Mongoose6323.

As one commenter pointed out, “there's more benefits for both employee and employer than downsides, enough studies have proven it at this point. And just like with the five day work week, any company that doesn't follow suit will find their labor pool all going to their competitors.”

Especially as the 2024 election looms near, many millennials worry about the future of democracy as we know it.

democracy, 2024 electionGroup of protestorsPhoto credit: Canva

Jamanuh1776 went so far as to say we “might actually witness the fall of the American Empire.”

_idiot_kid_ added:

“As an American this thought is always in the back of my head. The USA is a really young nation. And it's doing many things completely wrong. When I'm old my birth country may no longer exist. That's a serious fear that I'm not sure older generations ever experienced.”

As far as the economy is concerned, folks are understandably wary.

economy, recession, housing crisisMan looking at graphPhoto credit: Canva

“I hope I see us all being able to relax, afford a decent house and get married if that’s what we want. I just want to wake up next to someone I like in my own home. I don’t know why this is suddenly some kind of fantasy akin to winning the lottery,” lamented enchiladasundae.

Meanwhile, Jahstin predicted Costco’s famous $1.50 hot dog combo might one day cost $2.

“This here is the scariest one,” one person joked. Honestly, with rising food prices, concern is warranted.

People also expected continued progress in society’s relationship to space travel.

space travel, space x Picture of a rocket in spacePhoto credit: Canva

Southern_Lead_1469 suggested that in 25-35 years space tourism would become “a real thing,” while BlinksTale quipped “The Mars landing will be neat.”

But again, it's not all gloom and doom. The conversation wasn’t without some signature millennial humor.

Match0311 hoped to see “Cereal bags that open and close like a Ziploc bag,” while another joked that “The 5th dentist will finally cave and they’ll all recommend Trident gum.”

I'm looking forward to those personal assistant robots like in 'Fallout' where they do your laundry and dishes and occasionally kill you,” said nzodd, while Blitz-IMP just wants there to be a “Spice Girls reunion.”

Lastly, one person is holding out for a future where his wife “actually breaks down a cardboard box before throwing it in the recycling bin.” It’s important to hold onto our dreams, no matter how lofty.

Science

College students use AI to decode ancient scroll burned in Mount Vesuvius

“Some of these texts could completely rewrite the history of key periods of the ancient world."

When Mount Vesuvius erupted in 79 C.E., it buried entire cities in volcanic materials. While Pompeii is the most famous site affected by the natural disaster, the nearby villa of Herculaneum was also laid to waste—including over 800 precious scrolls found inside Herculaneum’s library, which were carbonized by the heat, making them impossible to open and recover their contents.

Which brings us to the Vesuvius challenge, started by computer scientist Brent Seales and entrepreneurs Nat Friedman and Daniel Gross in March 2023. The contest would award $1 million in prizes to whoever could use machine learning to successfully read from the scrolls without damaging them.

On February 5, the prize-winning team was announced.


The team consisted of three savvy college students— Youssef Nader in Germany, Luke Farritor in the US, and Julian Schilliger in Switzerland—working with each other from across the globe.

Each student had a prior individual accomplishment in the challenge before teaming up. Farritor first deciphered a word from the scroll ((ΠΟΡΦΥΡΑϹ, or “porphyras,” which means “purple” in ancient Greek), after which Nader was able to read multiple column from the scroll, in addition to Julian Schilliger creating 3D map renderings of the papyrus.

Nader, Farritor and Schillinger eventually combined their talents to train machine-learning algorithms to decipher more than 2,000 characters. Contest organizers estimated a less than 30% success rate for even less characters.

So, what exactly did the scrolls say? Turns out, the ancient cultures were just as curious about what makes us truly happy in life as we are today.

From the Vesuvius Challenge/ scrollprize.org

The translated text, thought to be written by Epicurean philosopher Philodemus, appears to be a philosophical discussion on pleasure, and how it’s affected by things like music and food. And quite possibly “throwing shade” as stoicism by calling it “an incomplete philosophy because it has ‘nothing to say about pleasure.”

“We can’t escape the feeling that the first text we’ve uncovered is a 2,000-year-old blog post about how to enjoy life,” the Vesuvius Challenge website writes.

The first Vesuvius Challenge resulted in 5% of one scroll being read. For 2024, the goalpost has been moved to being able to read 90% of all four scrolls currently scanned, and to lay the foundation to read all 800 scrolls, and possibly other texts found at the Herculaneum library.

“Some of these texts could completely rewrite the history of key periods of the ancient world,” Robert Fowler, a classicist and the chair of the Herculaneum Society, told Bloomberg. “This is the society from which the modern Western world is descended.”

Using artificial intelligence to create a future has been a prime topic of conversation as of late, but this story is a great example of how AI can give us rare glimpses into the past as well. It's pretty incredible to think about how many ancient mysteries could be solved as technology continues to advance in the years to come.

But no matter how much knowledge we gain, it feels safe to say that pleasure might always an enigma.

Education

People in the 1900s made some wild predictions about the future—but they weren't all wrong

11 fantastical predictions too outlandish to be true. And 3 that totally came true.

French drawing series on scientific progress about the year 2000

Do you ever wonder what the future used to look like?

I mean back in the day, before we all walked around with glass bricks in our pockets that contained every piece of information that's ever been available and allowed us to connect with anyone anywhere in the world in real time. What did people from more than 100 years ago think our future might look like?

That was the question posed to French commercial artist Jean-Marc Côté in 1899. Côté and his team were commissioned to create a series of cards to commemorate the 1900 world's fair, "Exposition Universelle," in Paris, featuring images of how the world might look in the then-distant future of the year 2000. Sadly, the company that commissioned the project (which was likely either a toy or cigarette manufacturer) went out of business before the cards could actually be distributed, and the images remained out of print until author Isaac Asimov rediscovered and published them with accompanying commentary in 1986.

But now that we've lived through that fantastical future, how did these predictions turn out? Let's just say there was, um, a lot of creativity on display. Which is enough to make even the most flawed of these forecasts — of which there are many — even more fascinating to think about today.

Here are 11 delightfully inaccurate visions of the year 2000, according to artists from the late-19th century:

1. Prediction: Firefighters will fly around with batwings on.

This one didn't pan out ... unless maybe Côté was just trying to predict the creation of Batman?

firefighters, future, artist, imagination

Flying firefighters in artist rendering from the 1900 world's fair.

All images by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

2. Prediction: We'll all travel across the Atlantic in these sweet-lookin' blimp-boats.

Again, not spot on ... although to be fair, I'd prefer this to ever flying standby again.

technology, predictions, artist, world's fair 1900

It's a flying blimp boat.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

3. Prediction: We will domesticate whales and use them as transportation.

Nope. If only we'd spent half of the 20th century training whales instead of killing them.(Although there is that dolphin chillin' there, and dolphin-assisted childbirthis a thing that exists in the 21st century, for better or for worse.)

whales, transportation, imagination, future predictions

A drawing of a dolphin looking at a whale bus.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

4. Prediction: We will also domesticate giant mutant seahorses.

There's a slight chance all this weird aquatic stuff was their way of warning us about the impending threat of sea-level rise from climate change. Either that or they were warning us about the general existence of Aquaman.

fanciful drawing, seahorse, mutation, future tripping

Drawing of scuba divers riding giant seahorses.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

5. Prediction: We'll be hunting seagulls ... from underwater?

Not so correct. But maybe I'm wrong, and we've been overlooking the nutritional value of seagulls for the last century. (Also, why is that woman swimming in a dress?)

seagulls, divers, cartoon, 1900

Divers attract seagulls from underwater in future prediction drawing.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

6. Prediction: Flying cars will be a thing.

While this image does resemble the traffic outside the Paris Opera just before showtime, our automobiles are unfortunately still stuck on the ground. It does go to show, however, that humans have been obsessed with the idea of flying cars for a long time.

flying cars, predictions, painting, world's fair, 1900

A painting of flying cars.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

7. Prediction: Aerial wing-flapping hover cars will be our key mode of transportation.

Although perhaps it's only a matter of time until "Uber for aerial wing-flapping hover cars" becomes a thing.

Hopefully, by the time this happens, that orange aerial wing-flapping hover car on the right will learn how to fly without slicing her wings through the other aero-cabs on the stand.

cars of the future, artist predictions, 1900, 2000,

Wing-flapping cars cruise around the city.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

8. Prediction: Automated bathrooms will make our lives much easier.

As clever as today's smart homes are, we still haven't quite figured out how to create a fully-automated bathroom like this. The few failed attempts that have been made at creating robot lipstick applicators were all much less elegant, and much less steampunk.

automated, home, convenience, painting

Woman gets dressed in automated bathroom.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

9. Prediction: Our hardworking barbers and salon specialists will be replaced by robots.

I'm OK with this one not panning out because I'm just not ready to trust an automated tree of spider arms to use sharp objects near my head.

robots, barber, technology, advancement, society

Robots do the work of a barber.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

10. Prediction: Our education system will become way more high tech.

While this one is utterly incorrect on a literal level, the image itself works pretty well as a metaphor for our modern education system. Whether that's a good or a bad thing is entirely up to you. (Although we do have EEG technology today, which isn't so different from those helmets...)

school, education, technology, computers

Students learn with technology if futuristic rendering from the 1900 world's fair.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

11. Prediction: radium.

That's scary. It might help if you wanted to breed a race of ginormous seahorses ... but probably isn't safe to keep in the fireplace as your main source of heat.

radium, future fuels, family, convenience

People relax around a radium fueled fireplace.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

Not all of these future visions were as ridiculously off-the-mark as the ones above though.In fact, here are three more that were downright prescient.

1. Prediction: We'll communicate via video chatting.

They totally called the invention of FaceTime/Google Hangouts/every other video chatting service that I use on a daily basis.To be honest, I kinda wish I had a holographic phonograph setup like this. It's way cooler than just staring at my laptop screen all day. (Also I wish I had a sweet mustache like these dudes.)

video chat, computers, technology, drawings

People communicate through a predicted version of video chat.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

2. Prediction: We'll see the rise of a mobile society that's not locked into a single location.

Sure, on an overly-literal level, this is basically just a glorified mobile home — which is kind of ironic considering how mobile homes in America are more commonly associated with lower incomes than the wealth that this image depicts.

mobil homes, community, travel, future

A drawing of a future prototype mobile home.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

But more importantly, images like this — and the one below, which accurately predicts the rise of electric trains that have helped to enable more public mass transportation — show that these French thinkers were looking forward to a more adaptable and international society. Telecommuting, remote offices, cross-continental teleconferencing, even the idea of transient living through AirBnB — that's where we are today, and it's exactly where we wanted to be at the turn of the 20th century. And that's pretty freaking cool!

(There's also probably an argument to be made that this electric train suggests a greener and less coal-dependent future, which is cool too.)

electric train, travel, technology, predictions

People board an artist drawing of a futuristic electric train.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

3. Prediction: The future will be full of automated industry.

Today, automation and industrialization can be touchy subjects. Are they responsible for job loss? Do they rely too much on questionable cost-cutting practices, such as artificial ingredients and other structural shortcuts?

Those are all important issues to address. But the future portrayed in these images reminds us of the inherent optimism of industry and progress — something that's all too easy for us to ignore today.

farming, industrial, prototypes, jobs, community

A picture of a possible future with industrialized farming.

Image by Jean-Marc Côté/Wikimedia Commons.

See how happy this guy is? He's not freaking out over (and alternately consuming) pesticides and chemicals for the sake of mass production. He's got a big ol' farm, and technology is helping him to make more stuff — and make it fast, so he can sell it and make money and support his family and all that good stuff we like to talk about when we talk about jobs.

Sure, maybe modern factory farming does deserve its less-than-stellar reputation. But at the same time, it's all too easy for us to forget the amazing headway in the creation of life. Now, we can even 3D print ovaries to induce fertility. Think about how amazing that would have seemed in 1899.

And on that note, maybe we should also celebrate the fact that we can 3D print a freaking house today. For all the very real problems that we face in the modern world, technology like that still makes a major difference in a lot of people's lives.

Also these brilliant French futurists clearly foretold of the rise of the almighty Roomba, which is just wonderful on so many levels.

As fun as it is to look and laugh at the imagined futures of the past, this is also a really cool way of evaluating where we are today — and where else we need to go.

It's kind of like writing out your own personal five-year plan ... envisioning the future still makes it easier for us to map out how to get there. Sure, it might not look exactly as you'd hoped — after all, you can't predict every random roadblock you might hit along the way. But it still helps to have some idea of where you're going.

The future is happening all around us, every single day — sometimes so much and so fast that we don't even notice.

Between improving factory farm conditions and domesticating those giant radioactive seahorses, there's obviously still a lot to be done.

Instead of letting ourselves become jaded with the growth we take for granted, maybe this is evidence that we should all try to look back at where we came from, evaluate and celebrate just how far we've come, and figure out a plan to keep moving forward.

This article originally appeared on 08.10.16