Strong, confident, and loud, these women are fighting back against anti-Muslim rhetoric.
Like most friends, Amirah Aulaqi and Mariana Aguilera have a lot in common.
They live in New York City and have a passion for fashion. Amirah runs her own formal-wear company, Amirah Couture. Mariana runs The Demureist, a fashion and lifestyle blog. They also practice Islam and have experienced microagressions and street harassment in the wake of recent terrorist attacks.
"I started noticing people giving me these hateful stares all the time. On the street, on the train, everywhere," Mariana said in an interview with Vivala. "This hateful mentality has really impacted the Muslim community and it's really dangerous."
Mariana walks the streets of New York City. Image via Upworthy/YouTube.
It's true. The number of destructive, threatening, or violent incidents at U.S. mosques tripled from 2014 to 2015. And anti-Muslim rhetoric particularly from two of the leading Republican presidential candidates has only fanned the flames of intolerance.
But instead of letting fear and worry take hold, Amirah and Mariana decided to empower themselves and other Muslim women.
The duo developed self-defense classes for observant Muslim women, a particularly vulnerable group because their hijabs, or head scarves, often make them a target for harassment. With the help of Nicole Daniels, a trained martial arts instructor, Amirah and Mariana have hosted multiple self-defense workshops, attracting women not just from New York City, but Connecticut and New Jersey as well.
Participants cover the basics, including simple but effective strikes.
All GIFs by Upworthy/YouTube.
And using authoritative, commanding voices.
But the workshop also covers things like body language and maintaining a strong, confident presence in public.
A few simple changes can make all the difference. "[It] changes you from looking like a victim to looking like somebody who's empowered and not going to be messed with," Mariana told Upworthy.
Participants work with Nicole Daniels, an accomplished athlete and instructor. Image via Upworthy/YouTube.
The women who enroll don't take classes because they're victims. In fact, it's just the opposite.
The class offers an opportunity for women to come together and feel supported at a time when the mere idea of existing in your space is seen as a political act. Battling vitriol in the media and hatred or fear on the street is exhausting and can make anyone feel less-than or unworthy of kindness.
Dozens of demonstrators gathered at Columbus Circle in New York City to denounce the politics of Donald Trump and the treatment of Muslim refugees in America and Europe. Photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images.
Amirah and Mariana hope these classes will empower Muslim women to stand up for themselves, not just in the case of physical attacks, but in everyday exchanges.
"We want you to go out and say, 'I'm a Muslim woman and nobody has the right to take my dignity or freedom within this country,'" Amirah told NPR.
Amirah shares her story. Image via Upworthy/YouTube.
Mariana and Amirah don't just have a lot in common with each other, they have a lot in common with all of us.
No matter our religion or background, we're all looking to carve out a space where we feel safe, welcome, and supported. It may be a self-defense class. It may be a gender-neutral bathroom. It may be a store that abandoned plus-size labels.
Whatever and wherever it is, we can do so much for one another by building, creating, and supporting places and resources that allow everyone to feel their best.
There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."