Mom sparks passionate debate after saying she would choose her own life over child’s during birth
Having an older child to come home to really changes your perspective.

Moms admit they'd choose their life over their child's in childbirth.
Surprise! There's a debate going around social media, specifically TikTok, about mothers who would choose to save their own lives over their baby's life if complications arose during birth. Apparently, the internet is having some big feelings, and surprisingly—or maybe not surprisingly—it's coming from other women.
Honestly, when I first saw the videos going around about this very heated debate, I didn't think much of it. But the conversation continued to grow and the judgment of moms who would choose themselves was abundant, so I decided to have a look-see. The debate started after Anabel Morales went viral on the platform for posting a video with a text overlay.
“To my husband: If I’m giving birth, and the doctor says you need to pick between me or the baby. Please save me. I don’t want Ethan to grow up without a mom, & I don’t want you to have to raise two babies alone while also grieving your wife,” Morales wrote.
Unsurprisingly, many moms agreed, myself included. The thought of leaving behind children to grieve the loss of their mother while being cared for by a father who is also grieving his wife seems unfathomable to some when there's a choice involved. But to others, the clear choice is on the other end of the spectrum because they couldn't imagine living without their child. Currently, the 6-second video has 6.6 million views and over a half million likes.
"My mom sadly passed away because it was either me or her. But no one understands how hard it was for me and my dad. Having him raise me alone and me having to grow up without a mom. So I will choose myself no matter how forced I am to choose the baby. Because I don't want the baby going through what I did. It sucks," one commenter shared.
That certainly adds another layer that I don't think many people considered when having this hypothetical but very possible debate. In America, the pregnancy mortality rate is much higher than in other developed nations, with the 2018 CDC data showing that the pregnancy mortality rate among white non-Hispanic people at 13.7 deaths per 100,000 births. The rate is significantly higher for Indigenous and Black people at 26.5 and 41.4 deaths per 100,000 births, respectively.
@anabelmoralezz 😩😩 #trending #viral #pickme #husbandwife #laboranddelivery #savethemoms #foryou #foryoupage #fy #fyp #momsoftiktok
"I used to say save the baby not me. Now that I have a daughter I think so differently," another mom wrote.
"I had these feelings during my third pregnancy and felt so guilty. I'm glad I'm not the only one that feels this way," someone else commented.
On the other side of the camp, plenty of people said they would choose their baby. While some were more respectful in their word choice than others, the sentiment was clear.
What you would do in a situation where the choice is between you and your soon-to-be Earth-side baby is completely personal. It's something discussed in hopes that the choice never has to be made, but for some families it does, and it's one of those instances where there's no right answer. The choice between grief and grief feels impossible because no matter what, everyone will hurt.
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There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."