Divorce attorney shares why working moms are leaving their marriages
Women are not shocked by his answer.

Working moms are filing for divorce more often
Being a parent is a full time job but without the money and health benefits. Kissing scrapped knees, planning meals, scheduling doctor appointments, extracurricular activities, PTO meetings, the list could go on for days. But in today's society many women with children not only work inside the home but outside as well because a two income household is necessary in many cases. So why are moms leaving their marriages to do it all on their own?
Divorce attorney, Dennis Vetrano Jr. posted a video to TikTok that has over 7.4 million views, explaining the rise of working moms filing for divorce. The revelation came as no surprise to women or other divorce attorneys who commented under Vetrano's video but it may be surprising to some men.
You know how there's that saying that girls mature faster than boys, the initiation of divorce by working moms may be a continuation of that notion.
"I'm seeing working moms doing it all, and I'm seeing the husbands step back and say, huh I don't gotta do a thing. She's got the kids, she's got the groceries, she's got the laundry, she's got the meals, she's got the work," Vetrano says. "That's the theme and women are tired."
Over the past few decades women have taken on more roles outside of the home out of necessity and desire but their load inside the home hasn't decreased. The wives Vetrano is speaking about have partners who haven't caught up with the evolution of roles. Essentially still living like the 50s expecting their wives to take care of all household responsibilities while ignoring the fact that their wives work outside of the home just like they do.
"We even filed the divorce, find the attorney, created the child custody schedule," one woman wrote.
"After my divorce I had one less child to take care of. Leveled up," another commented.
"I will never forget the day I said 'if i'm doing it all by myself, I might as well be by myself,'" someone else wrote.
Another divorce lawyer even chimed in saying that her clients who are women are often much happier after divorce. It certainly makes you wonder about the maturity theme here. Not in the way of men being immature but women adapting much more quickly to societal shifts as some men struggle to keep up or even see the correlation that leads to divorce.
Take a look at the video below and if you're feeling extra adventurous, check out the comments under the main video to see if you agree with the sentiments women are expressing.
@drvlaw The major theme I’ve been seeing? Women are TIRED #divorce #divorced #divorceparty #divorcedlife #divorcedmom #divorcesucks #divorcecoach #divorcedparents #divorceattorney #divorcesupport #divorceparties #divorcehelp #divorcerecovery #DivorceForce #divorcecourt #divorcecommunity #divorcedonedifferently #divorceddad #divorcechaos #divorceproceedings #divorcedmoms #divorcee #divorcecoaching #divorcees #divorcecake #divorcelawyer #divorceeducation #divorcesurvivor
- Women are cheering on a mom who left her husband after he refused to clean the house for 6 days ›
- Feminist blogger has tough advice for mothers with lazy husbands: 'Divorce his ass' ›
- Happily divorced mom hilariously busts 'sad single mom' stereotype ... ›
- Divorced dad receives hopeful letter from daughter - Upworthy ›
- Woman soft launches her divorce online for months - Upworthy ›
- Mom calls out weaponized incompetence by flipping the script - Upworthy ›
- Mom creates relatable email signature for working parents - Upworthy ›
- Mom asks what if we dismissed others the way we do moms - Upworthy ›
- Gen X stay-at-home moms are at a weird transition time - Upworthy ›
12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women
We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.
Men and the feels.
Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.
In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.
Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?
IS IT?
Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.
Encourage.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Sharing ideas.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."
Email requests.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
Idea sharing.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.
Sexism.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.
Mansplain.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.
Mistakes.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.
Promotions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.
Rude.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.
Interruptions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.
Collaboration.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.
Disagreements.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!
In conclusion...
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.
About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.
The comedic book cover.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.
This article was originally published on March 25, 2019.