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A traveler admitted that she couldn't tell Korean locals apart. They said she wasn't racist.

Research says things literally get a little fuzzy when we aren't exposed to other races.

Is it racist to think people of a certain race all look the same? Not necessarily.

Whether we'd like to admit it or not, most people have heard someone say something along the lines of "all (insert racial group) look the same." It's not unique to one race either—comedians across the racial spectrum joke about this seemingly racist phenomenon. The phrase can sound a little racist even when the person admitting to it doesn't mean it to be.

Julia, a frequent traveler, recently had her own experience with this phenomenon when she traveled to South Korea. The woman realized that she couldn't tell the locals apart, which was baffling and embarrassing to her. Once she confessed to her Korean friends, they all got a good chuckle when they revealed they had a hard time telling white people apart. When the sentiment was the same in Mozambique, she decided to do some research into why people have difficulty identifying differences in racial groups outside of their own.

racism; race; facial recognition; is it racist; look the same; similar looks; inclusion; representation Happy friends enjoying a playful moment together. Photo credit: Canva

To Julia's surprise, there was a reason for this seemingly strange occurrence, and it had little to nothing to do with racism. The reason the phrase isn't always racist is that it happens to be true in many instances. Even in diverse countries, people tend to stay in communities that look similar to themselves due to similar cultural upbringings and expectations. Of course, this self-segregating grouping dilutes in major cities where people live near a plethora of different ethnicities and races, in which they build community.

Those who live near other races and ethnicities may have an easier time recognizing the different facial features of people from races different from their own. This is because exposure is key to not only understanding cultural differences but also visually seeing how facial features differ from one race and ethnicity to the next.

racism; race; facial recognition; is it racist; look the same; similar looks; inclusion; representation Facial recognition interface scanning a person.Photo credit: Canva

While the woman uses race to describe the phenomenon, it's important to note that race and ethnicity are two different things. A person of Chinese descent would be categorized racially as Asian, but their ethnicity would likely be Han Chinese, which makes up 91% of China. While a South Korean's race would be Asian as well, their ethnicity would be Korean. In both of these instances, their nationality would be the country in which they were born.

This is a pretty standard breakdown across ethnic and racial groups except Black Americans, who are descendants of chattel slavery. Black Americans' race is Black/African American, but unlike other groups, their ethnic group is also Black/African American, while their nationality is American. Whereas a Black British person may say their nationality is British, their race is Black, but their ethnicity is Nigerian Igbo. It's important to acknowledge the difference in race and ethnicity because one could belong to a racial group but still have the same issue with recognizing the differences of an ethnic group within their race.

racism; race; facial recognition; is it racist; look the same; similar looks; inclusion; representation Team collaboration sparks creativity and innovation.Photo credit: Canva

In Julia's research into why people struggle with recognizing faces from different groups, she discovered something fascinating: there's a name for the phenomenon, "it's called cross-race effect, and it's not about racism, it's about how our brains are wired. TLDR, you're not racist, you just have a lazy a** brain." She goes on to explain, "Our brains are essentially pattern recognition machines. The more often we see something like faces from our community, the better our brain gets from picking up subtle differences without us even realizing it. It's a bit like muscle memory but with visual processing."

The fusiform face area (FFA) is sort of like a shortcut to this processing faces even when we aren't necessarily paying attention. But like most things, you need to exercise the muscle for it to work properly in all scenarios. When it comes to faces, if the only faces you see look like your own, then it'll be difficult to recognize the distinct features of people who don't look like those in your racial or ethnic group.

Recently, singer-songwriter Billie Eilish faced backlash for her remarks while performing in Ireland after commenting, "As you guys know, I'm Irish. I am not from here, obviously. It's really cool to come somewhere and, like, everyone looks exactly like you, and you're all just as pasty as me. I love it." Some fans were offended since white people in America tend to be overrepresented in television and music. While overrepresentation may be true, chances are, since America is so diverse, the singer likely hasn't run into many people of the same ethnicity.

The first faces we learn to recognize are those in our households, which tend to resemble ourselves unless you're an adoptee. These are the faces our FFA practices on before moving on to those in their direct community, slowly expanding outward as one travels further from home.

racism; race; facial recognition; is it racist; look the same; similar looks; inclusion; representation Facial recognition technology concept.Photo credit: Canva

"When it (FFA) sees familiar types of faces, for example, faces you've had lots of exposure to, it lights up, like ha, I know this. But when it sees faces from a group you haven't spent much time with, the neural activation is weaker and less precise. Your brain doesn't process all the details. It kind of glosses over it. It's almost like your brain says, 'eh, close enough, I'll just put everything in the same category as the ones I've already seen,'" Julia explains before adding later. "It's not that the other races actually look the same, it's that our brain isn't trained to see the differences, yet."

In many ways, it's like hearing someone speak French when you don't speak the language. At first, the words all mush together and sound the same, but as you begin to pick up on French words, things become clearer. So, no, everyone who thinks people from another ethnic group all look the same is racist; they simply need to exercise that part of their brain.

@desirously.ambitious/Instagram

What CAN'T is be "people-made," though?

Language evolves as humanity evolves. We know this. History has proven it over and over again.

And yet, there’s still so much resistance when certain linguistic changes are tied to gender issues. The introduction of they/them pronouns comes to mind as an example. Many well-meaning, grammar nerds (myself included) bristled at the thought of incorporating this kind of language, even if they fully supported the idea behind the concept.

But when we get too stuck in the weeds of semantics, we miss the opportunity for vital transformative conversations.

Take for instance a video that came out around 2021—and the debate it sparked—when a little girl questioned why things were “man-made,” rather than “people-made.”

In the clip (whose source is undetermined but shared across several platforms) the girl passionately explains to her mother how she heard the term in her social studies class, and how much it irked her, since it seemed to only regard men as creators.

“Aren’t women building the Eiffel Tower or something? Aren’t women allowed to build stuff?!” she exclaims.

She then refers to Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address, which stated that “all men are created equal.”

“Aren’t women created equal too? Why don’t they say all people are created equal?!” she prods.

Down in the comments, people applauded the little girl’s hilarious gusto.

“You go girl. Little genius,” one person wrote.

Another added, “keep that critical thinking cap on, little mama.”

As to be expected, many people also commented on how the little girl’s argument was unjustified, since, linguistically speaking, it is implied that both men and women are included in the word “man.”

“She is missing the point! Man in this sense is a plural word, meaning man and woman,” one person wrote.”

Another added, “I am so over this. Man made = huMAN, woMAN, MAN! The term is already inclusive of all genders. Stop looking for problems where there aren't any. I'm so sick of this nonsense.”

But is it really nonsense? After all, we need only look to our Constitution to know that women have certainly not always been included in language that pertains to “all men.” Or we could look to all the many instances throughout history in which patriarchal values (that is, values which undermine a woman’s inherent and equal worth) silently shaped the way we lived our everyday lives.

Not to mention that this argument denies language’s true nature—to change along with our own levels of awareness. Perhaps the reality is that this little girl is performing her job as a member of the younger generation, by questioning things older generations might take for granted. After all, we don’t create change by not asking uncomfortable questions.

Bottom line: we have not always been an inclusive society. It is reflected in our language. As we collectively continue to become more inclusive, so too will that be reflected in our language. That’s a good thing. It’s a marker of progress. Think of all the energy we spend combating these inevitable changes when we could instead allow them to help us grow as people.

Heather Avis said she "could count on one hand" the amount of times her daughter Macy had received party invitations.

Macy Avis, a 9th-grader with Down Syndrome, had a reaction to receiving a birthday party invite that was so pure and joyous that it quickly went viral on Instagram.

Heather Avis, Macy’s mom, wrote in the video’s caption that she could “count on one hand the amount of birthday parties” that Macy had been invited to throughout her childhood.

Understandably, when a friend from Macy’s life skills program handed her an invitation, her joy was “palpable.”



“To me it spoke of a longing fulfilled. All I could do was laugh with her and then cry as I celebrated with her,” Avis wrote.

In the video, we hear the proud mom say, “You got invited to a birthday party?” followed by absolute squeals of delight from Macy.

Watch:

Macy and her mom weren’t the only ones feeling celebratory. So many viewers chimed in to share their own joy at the news, and offer some encouragement.

“Thank you for sharing this wonderful moment with us! I got goosebumps listening to the glee in Macy’s voice. I am so incredibly happy for her and can’t wait to hear all about the amazing time she’s bound to have!” one person wrote.

Another declared, “This is the best thing on the whole internet."

The birthday party invite is the result of Avis’s “fight” to find inclusive spaces for her daughter, a journey she noted has “only just begun” in a pinned Instagram post.

Avis explained up until recently how Macy was in general education, where they had experienced some “amazing inclusive classrooms,” but still overall “felt a longing for belonging.” This led Macy to joining a life skills program with other disabled students, where she has been able to nurture a solid community—complete with birthday invitations.

As for how that party went, this follow-up video speaks for itself:

Along with celebrating Macy’s victory, Avis used the moment to note that “the party was inclusive not because a student in the general education program invited Macy, but because a person with an intellectual disability invited both disabled and non-disabled individuals. It was inclusive because people like Macy and the young man we were celebrating, who are often excluded, truly understand how to include others. Let’s reflect on that for a moment!”

While it’s important that students with Down Syndrome are placed in environments with the resources they need, not including them into the general community doesn’t help break through the stigma they regularly face—including being treated as children even when they are adults, or assuming they are entirely dependent. This was an issue recently tackled in the “Assume I Can” ad starring Madison Tevlin.


Moreover, Avis added that prioritizing diversity and inclusion offers the “beautiful gift” of “recognizing our shared humanity” among those who might at first seem different from us. That’s why she continues advocating for both her daughter and the Down Syndrome community through her The Lucky Few Foundation and podcast.

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Man uses social media to teach others ASL so kids don't experience what he did as a child

Every child should be able to communicate in a way that works best for them.

Man teaches people ASL so no child experiences what he did

People start communicating from the moment they enter the world usually through cries, faces, grunts and squeals. Once infants move into the toddler phase the combine all of their previous communication skills with pointing and saying a few frequently used words like "milk," "mama," "dada" and "eat."

Children who are born without the ability to hear often still go through those same stages with the exception of their frequently used words being in sign language. But not all hearing parents know sign language, which can stunt the language skills of their non-hearing child. Ronnie McKenzie is an American Sign Language advocate that uses social media to teach others how to sign so deaf and nonverbal kids don't feel left out.

"But seriously i felt so isolated 50% of my life especially being outside of school i had NONE to sign ASL with. Imagine being restricted from your own language," McKenzie writes in his caption.


The dad explains that he was the only deaf child on both sides of his family and no one spoke ASL to him outside of school. Because of his experience feeling isolated within his own family, he decided to build his social media platform around ASL literacy, his followers look forward to his daily lessons. Parents and teachers of deaf and nonverbal children thank him for the work he's doing and often request certain signs to help them communicate.

McKenzie advocates that ASL become a language taught in elementary schools as a standard part of curriculum so students are able to effectively communicate with everyone around them. In one of his more recent videos, he teaches parents how to sign basic words children may need to know like, "pizza," "don't touch," and "follow me."

Parents and educators jumped into the comments to ask for help learning more signs.

"I work in school, and I would like to know school materials like: paper, crayons, pencil, paint, brushes, or words like: homework, test, recess. Thanks," someone writes.

"Can you do “gentle” or “careful”? Like for a toddler with a new baby at home," another asks.

"I love this so much. My son is non-verbal and struggles with learning any way to communicate. I feel me trying to learn ASL is something that will help him- I appreciate you, we all do," a commenter reveals.

Not everyone will pick up ASL quickly, but McKenzie's approach to repeat the signs three times and give signs for different situations that people frequently incur is likely most helpful. When learning a language, even our first language, we pick up on words used the most in familiar situations so giving context to the signs can help it stick. Hopefully more people are inspired to learn from McKenzie to make the world more accessible to others.