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Education

Teachers are sharing their students' wildest excuses that actually turned out to be true

Here are 17 of the best responses.

teachers, students excuses, teachers funny stories

Teachers share the best excuses.

Kindergarten through 12th grade teachers and college professors have heard every excuse in the book. Whether it’s a third grader claiming their “dog ate my homework” or a college freshman claiming their grandmother died to get out of a test, they’ve heard it all a billion times.

A college professor once listed the top 21 excuses he’s heard from his students. Here are the top five:

5. “It’s the last week of the semester.”

4. “It’s St. Patrick’s Day or 4/20”

3. “Our other teacher held us back.”

2. “My timetable showed the class was canceled.”

1. “I’m taking a vacation.”


Yes, some students actually say they didn’t do their work because of a holiday predicated on drinking or getting stoned and others have the audacity to say, “Hey! I needed a vacation.” After spending week after week fielding excuses, there’s a good reason why most educators are skeptical when they hear one from their students.

But every once in a while, an excuse that seems way too improbable to be believed actually is true.

Reddit user u/minecraftplayer48 asked the teachers of Reddit to share the “best excuse for being late that turned out to be true” and the stories were all pretty great. But it wasn’t only teachers who chimed in; a lot of people shared stories from when they were students and had an excuse that was so crazy they didn’t think anyone would believe them.

Here are 17 of the best excuses for being late that were actually true.

1. Revenge of the torque wrench


"My auto teacher let me practice removing and adding the tires on his vehicle. The next morning it was about 20 minutes into first period and no sign of him. He comes running into the classroom out of breath and his hair is all messed up. He points at me and says 'YOU!!!! What is a torque wrench used for???' I respond with "I don't know." He says ' I know you don't know!!!" Turns out one of his tires came off while driving down the highway." — ethnicjello

2. Mom wanted to sleep in


"She had to take her sister to school and drive her mom to rehab. She was always late to class because her mom just wanted to sleep in. Problem was if the mom was late or did not go she would have violated her probation and gone to prison. I never marked her late. If she missed anything important she could come in at lunch or after school to make it up." — RM156

3. "That was you?"


"Student here, I headed into school early to get some studying done in the library before my night class. I was one exit away when I was caught in a 3 car accident. Most of the expressway afterwards was gridlock with only one lane left open. I did eventually make it into my lab class 15 minutes late, with a few scrapes and bruises. My professors reaction was simply 'Oh that was you!''" — AlienCowAbduction

4. "School bus blew up"


"I was one of about 20 kids who were late to school. We showed up at the school office as a group and when questioned why we were late, we said 'The school bus blew up.' They questioned 'So the engine blew up?' The kids 'No, the whole bus, in flames. It blew up.'

"There was much conference between the teachers, all of them thinking we embellished the story. Next thing you know, one of the admin staff has the news website open, very obvious image of an entire bus on fire with a bunch of kids in our school uniform standing in front of it. Our late slip for class read 'School bus blew up.'" — AusPB90

5. B.U.I.


"Told me he got pulled over by the cops for wobbly driving on his bike and they thought he was drunk. Turned out he was just dodging all the slugs on the street." — Fortisvol

6. Chicken of death


"A guy in my college class missed class one day. The next day he came in with his eye covered up and medical paperwork in hand. Apparently he got pecked in the eye by a chicken." — BrrToe

7. Chicken 2: The chickening


"When I was student teaching, I was late because there was bunch chickens in the middle of the road. They wouldn't move at all. This is in the middle of a city of 200,000 people. Freaking chickens.

"I finally get to school and profusely apologize to my mentor teacher and I told her why I was late thinking it sounded ridiculous. She said, 'yeah, those chickens are fucking assholes, they surrounded my car in the McDonalds parking lot last year. Don't worry about it." — Makenshine

8. Cracker Barrel conference


"Taught a group of seniors first period. It was towards the end of the year. I had a class of around 30 and only 5 were there when the bell rang. Halfway through class, the rest of them show up. They went out to Cracker Barrel for breakfast and brought me some back. All was forgiven." — SwansonsLoveChild

9. Beary late


"Bear on the backyard. No access gate. Animal control had to tranq it from the room and drag it through the house. Made the news. Got to retake the test I missed after sending her the news article." — Vladtehwood

10. Present the flat


"We had an exam in my class and the teacher got a message from a student saying that he was going to be late because his car had a flat tire (the student was known to party), the teacher didn't think it could be true, so as a joke the teacher asked him to bring the tire back. He brought the flat tire back in the middle of the exam. Needless to say, the professor didn't expect that." — Sapang

11. Moo


"A kid missed my first-period class one morning but was in school later that day. When I asked him why he hadn't arrived in time for my course, he said his cow was birthing its calf that morning, so he'd picked being in the barn over English. Made sense to me. His essays weren't going to win any ribbons at the county fair, but his calf could." — Bobosbigsister

12. Abduction


"In high school a kid came late to history class. He was a joker so when someone asked him where he had been, he goes 'I was kidnapped.' Everyone laughed, until he goes 'no really.'

"Turns out 2 guys kidnapped him and tossed him into the back of the minivan he was using for his morning paper route. They drove him around while they robbed something. I can’t remember what happens after. I think they just drove the van somewhere and got away." — notinmybackyardcanad

13. Honesty is the best excuse


"Not a teacher, but a kid walked into my class one day and literally just said 'Sorry I'm late, I didn't want to be here.' He wasn't wrong I suppose." — Scally59

14. It actually was the dog


"A little off topic but in 8th grade, a friend of mine turned in their homework late because her dog literally ate her homework. She even brought a note from her parents." — JoeyJoey2004

15. Is this a real excuse? Or is it fantasy?


"'Sorry Bohemian Rhapsody came on just as I parked.' — My art teacher when he was about 5:55 minutes late." — Deeberber

16. "I took a shortcut"


"This happened to me as a pupil; a very quiet, unassuming kid in our class came in to German with about five minutes of the class left. We went to a Catholic school and the teachers were all quite strict and intimidating. Classes were usually silent, especially in junior school. When this boy came into class at the end of the lesson that day, the door flew inwards with such force that the teacher gave an audible gasp.

"It had been raining heavily outside, his hair was plastered to his forehead. His blazer was dripping and sodden. He had mud caked into his trousers up to his knees, and he was breathing heavily. The teacher exclaimed, ‘Brendan! What happened?’ We all stared up at him in shocked silence. This quiet, unassuming little boy let out a big sigh and just said, ‘I took a shortcut.’ And went straight to his seat.

"That line became iconic in our school for years afterward." — lestat85

17. Pug lovers can attest


"Kid was late to school and had to miss a very important football game. The reason? His fat pug fell asleep on his phone. The pug’s fat rolls muffled his alarm." — tip52


This story originally appeared on 02.24.22

Mel Robinson making a TED Talk.

Towards the end of The Beatles’ illustrious but brief career, Paul McCartney wrote “Let it Be,” a song about finding peace by letting events take their natural course. It was a sentiment that seemed to mirror the feeling of resignation the band had with its imminent demise.

The bittersweet song has had an appeal that has lasted generations and that may be because it reflects an essential psychological concept: the locus of control. “It’s about understanding where our influence ends and accepting that some things are beyond our control,” Jennifer Chappell Marsh, a marriage and family therapist, told The Huffington Post. “We can’t control others, so instead, we should focus on our own actions and responses.”

This idea of giving up control, or the illusion of it, when it does us no good, was perfectly distilled into 2 words that everyone can understand as the “Let Them” theory. Podcast host, author, motivational speaker and former lawyer Mel Robbins explained this theory perfectly in a vial Instagram video.

“I just heard about this thing called the ‘Let Them Theory,’ I freaking love this,” Robbins starts the video.

“If your friends are not inviting you out to brunch this weekend, let them. If the person that you're really attracted to is not interested in a commitment, let them. If your kids do not want to get up and go to that thing with you this week, let them.” Robbins says in the clip. “So much time and energy is wasted on forcing other people to match our expectations.”

“If they’re not showing up how you want them to show up, do not try to force them to change; let them be themselves because they are revealing who they are to you. Just let them – and then you get to choose what you do next,” she continued.

The phrase is a great one to keep in your mental health tool kit because it’s a reminder that, for the most part, we can’t control other people. And if we can, is it worth wasting the emotional energy? Especially when we can allow people to behave as they wish and then we can react to them however we choose.

@melrobbins

Stop wasting energy on trying to get other people to meet YOUR expectations. Instead, try using the “Let Them Theory.” 💥 Listen now on the #melrobbinspodcast!! “The “Let Them Theory”: A Life Changing Mindset Hack That 15 Million People Can’t Stop Talking About” 🔗 in bio #melrobbins #letthemtheory #letgo #lettinggo #podcast #podcastepisode

How you respond to their behavior can significantly impact how they treat you in the future.

It’s also incredibly freeing to relieve yourself of the responsibility of changing people or feeling responsible for their actions. As the old Polish proverb goes, “Not my circus, not my monkeys.”

“Yes! It’s much like a concept propelled by the book ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k.’ Save your energy and set your boundaries accordingly. It’s realizing that we only have “control” over ourselves and it’s so freeing,” 60DaysToLive2012 wrote.

“Let It Be” brought Paul McCartney solace as he dealt with losing his band in a very public breakup. The same state of mind can help all of us, whether it’s dealing with parents living in the past, friends who change and you don’t feel like you know them anymore, or someone who cuts you off in traffic because they’re in a huge rush to go who knows where.

The moment someone gets on your nerves and you feel a jolt of anxiety run up your back, take a big breath and say, “Let them.”


This article originally appeared last year.

Education

Never know how to answer the 'What do you do' question? This simple formula can help.

How many times have you been asked, "What do you do?" and not known what to say?

Let's face it, our answers to this question are usually a bit blasé.

We’ve all been there. The moment we’re face to face with a stranger and the ice breakers begin rolling in. During this little tête-à-tête, one question is sure to be as inevitable as Thanos himself: “What do you do?”

Even for the most skilled small talkers among us, this is not always a particularly easy question to answer. Not without sounding overly vague, sterile, or, yes, even dull. But as CNBC contributor and author Jessica Chen will tell you, there is a tried-and-true method that not only provides an answer for the “What do you do?” question but inspires authentic connection with others.

Her formula, which is included in her book Smart, Not Loud: How to Get Noticed at Work for All the Right Reasons, is pretty simple and definitely gives you more to work with than just saying your job title, which, barring any astronauts or Grammy award winners reading this, can sound pretty bland for most of us.


Without further ado, here are the 3 points to hit in your answer, according to Chen.

1. Talk about the issues you solve

This can help paint the picture that anyone can relate to, even if they have zero familiarity with your industry. Chen advises putting this in the form of a rhetorical question.

Examples:

  • “You know how cyberattacks are getting more frequent and sophisticated?”
  • “You know how you see ads when you scroll through a news story?”

2. Share the solutions you offer

Now’s your chance to clearly explain how your work addresses the issue you set up in step one. Chen notes that it’s important to think about “real-life implications" of what you do every day:

Examples:

  • “What I do is create software systems that alert companies when a suspicious user tries to access their platform.”
  • “What I do is research the best places to put ads so that they have maximum visibility.”

3. Drop some proof

This is where you tie it all together, using a story or other pertinent company details, in order to solidify your credibility.

  • “In fact, our organization is one of the largest cybersecurity companies in the world with clients like [well-known company].”
  • “In fact, the click-through rate of our ads is around 3%, which is much higher than the industry average.”

Put all those together and you’ve got: “You know how [talk about issues you solve]? So what I do is [share the solutions you offer]. In fact, [drop some proof].” Badda bing, badda boom, a concise, yet well-thought out and impactful answer that actually provides a snapshot of what you do for a living. Side effects might include nods of interest and response in the form of, “Wow, cool!”


If you’re struggling with all things small talk, having a go-to approach, much like this one, isn’t a bad idea. Having things like the FORD method, which is essentially a list of ice breaker questions that will get virtually anyone talking, in the back pocket can really help offset any social jitters that get in the way in the heat of the moment.

Basically, it’s totally okay if you don’t naturally have the gift of gab. But since you will likely have to engage in conversations throughout a good chunk of your life, it might behoove you to find ways to make it less stressful. And even for those of us who are extroverted and can chat with anyone, there are ways in which we can make our communication more impactful.

Nolan Reid / TikTok

There's an old joke slash meme that goes something like this: "Guys literally only want one thing and it's disgusting." Its used to imply, obviously, that men are shallow and crude creatures. TikTok creator and simple-life advocate Nolan Reid, however, has a different idea of what men really want.

Nolan recently made a video about "Little things in life that make men happy."

The hilarious list includes:

  • A fridge full of beer.
  • Drinking said beer in the garage. With your dog. And a good buddy.
  • Finding a cool stick.
  • Kicking a rock.
  • Staring at water.
  • Dropping rocks into said water.

As a fellow man, I would say: Yeah. That pretty much covers it.

It really doesn't take much! Watch Nolan's full video to see the rest, and just appreciate how much joy and satisfaction he gets from these simple thing.




People loved Nolan's list – so much so that they began adding their own ideas of "simple things men love."

The video racked up hundreds of thousands of views across TikTok and Instagram.

One commenter wrote, "He just described my whole personality." Another added, "This guy gets it."

Others chimed in with their own additions to the list, like staring at a fire for hours. Or just peace and quiet.

But most of the nearly 200 comments were just people chiming in to say one thing:

"Hell yeah."

Finally, someone who understands us.

Nolan's ultra-relaxed vision of "masculinity" is honestly so refreshing.

Men on social media are usually bombarded with the Andrew Tates and Jordan Petersons of the world, influencers who constantly berate us to make more money, lose weight and add muscle, sleep with more women, take charge, relentlessly self-improve.

I like Nolan's much chiller idea of masculinity. It reminds me of being a kid, taking pleasure in the simple things, not racing to be anywhere, not trying to impress anyone or prove anything.

Nolan's entire account is a breath of fresh air, an antidote to hustle culture. His videos find joy in:

  • Breaking down cardboard boxes
  • Driving at sunset
  • Going fishing
  • Throwing a frisbee
  • Wearing t-shirts
A daily visit to his page is almost like a meditation. I highly recommend giving him a follow to add a little counterprogramming to your social media feed.

Nolan says in another recent video that he started making TikToks and Instagram reels just for fun, but discovered along the way that he was really passionate about the message.

"I never thought that my simple living and love for little things would resonate with so many of you."

He said he hopes to inspire people to "take a step back and enjoy the good simple things in life."

I suddenly have the urge to go chuck a rock into a river, so I would say: Mission Accomplished!

This article originally appeared last year.

A woman can't believe who just texted her.

It’s funny to think that text messaging has only been a common form of communication for about 25 years. It began to take hold in the late 1990s, but most phones didn’t have full keyboards. You had to multi-tap a number on the handset to get to the correct letter. Needless to say, it took a long time just to get your thoughts out. It could also be expensive. Unlimited text wasn’t a thing back then, so you got dinged for 10 to 20 cents for every message you sent.

In 1998, Donovan Shears of Coventry, England, was so excited to get his first mobile phone for his 18th birthday that he texted a bunch of random numbers while hanging out at a pub where he worked. "I started sending out random text messages, showing off to my friends. I picked the first four digits the same as mine, then the last three digits randomly—it was probably about five or six different numbers—and then didn't think anything of it,” he said, according to the BBC.

But one person responded to his text, an 18-year-old girl named Kirsty in Cleethorpes, Lincolnshire, 100 miles away, who wrote, “Who’s this?” Donovan responded with a simple “Don.” Kirsty had just got a mobile phone, so she figured the text was from someone she had recently given her phone number to. Remember, those were the wonderful days when you didn’t get spam texts randomly saying, “Hi, how are you?” Today, Donovan’s text probably would have been blocked and marked as SPAM.

Donovan and Kirsty then began a conversation that has continued ever since. "That single moment led to over 20 years of love, laughter, and partnership," they said. They began texting each other daily, but after getting £250 ($311) phone bills, they started calling one another. Donovan immediately fell in love with Kirsty's Scottish accent.

Six months after the first text, Kirsty drove to Coventry to meet Donovan in person. "I said to my stepsister, I've got to go and meet this guy, and she was like, 'He could be anyone,' and I was like, 'Yes, I know,' but I was 18 and didn't really think about consequences. I just got on a train and came to Coventry."

The couple danced the night away at a club and then, in pure English tradition, capped the night off with a kebab. "I remember coming back from our first night out, and we just cuddled up; it was kind of magical in a way,” Donovan said, according to Grimsby Live.

The couple married four years later and have two children, Alora, 6, and Stirling, 9. Donovan has nothing but praise for Kirsty: "She is an amazing woman. She's so intelligent, and we know each other so well. She's my best friend as well as my wife."

The story is an incredible example of how the most important relationships in our lives sometimes come together just out of random chance. A meeting at a bar or an interaction at the supermarket can change our lives forever. It’s also a touching example of how the excitement over the ability to send a text message in 1998 brought together two people who never would have met without it. For all the pain that technology brings us in the modern world, there are still many reasons to love its ability to bring people together.

Photo credit: Canva, Note via @nightsayni/Reddit

He's sorry. He didn't mean to be mean.

For the most part, mood swings are pretty normal for kids. But man, can it be a challenge for parents to ride those emotional rollercoasters. After all, to stay completely regulated as someone goes from sweet giggles to unintelligible rage in .0002 seconds takes the tolerance of a trained monk. Still, even a little patience goes a long way with this herculean task.

Take this dad for instance, who recently shared two wildly different handwritten notes from his 5-year-old son, spanned only 10 minutes apart. For context, the dad explained that his son has gotten furious at him for “reading something to him instead of slowly sounding out the sounds for him to read himself.” What a monster, right?

During a time out his son took to cool off, he managed to write this sick burn: “You’re the worst dad in the world. I don’t even like you.”

The little fella must have immediately regretted his choice, because he also wrote another note, which read: “Sorry, sorry. I did not mean to be mean to you,” along with a sad picture of himself for good measure.


Have many, many, many parents been in this exact same boat? Judging by the comments, most certainly. One person wrote, “Kids are... interesting when it comes to mood swings; my 2 year old had a total meltdown this weekend because I opened his yogurt for him (he wanted to open it, but I didn't think he wanted to do it). A few minutes of crying and he popped back together and just ate his yogurt and was happy again.”

Another echoed, “Father of two 5y/os here. This is 100% normal and happens multiple times a week in our home. Lots of emotions at this age.”

One parent even shared how having safe spaces to process those big emotions can help kids develop into pretty emotionally stable adults, writing, “My son at that age would put himself into timeout (I never once put him into timeout but his kindergarten had that system).. so he would go into his room after he said something mean to me.. sit in a corner for 5-10 min and then come out and apologize and say he didn’t mean it.. he is almost 21 now and still the most thoughtful person I know, always considering how his words impact others.”

One person could even relate to the kiddo’s dilemma, saying, “Emotions are big and overwhelming! Sometimes I want to do the dang thing myself and sometimes I just want it done when I think about it. Thankfully in my decades on earth I'm better at recognizing and communicating the difference, but I totally get his frustration.”

gif of man throwing a tantrumIf we don't teach our kids to regulate their emotions early, workplaces might look like this in 20 years.media.giphy.com

But of course the best comment goes to the person who simply appreciated that “Lil bro had a whole character arc.”

It’s funny to see in plain writing the kind of emotional whiplash that every parent experiences once in a while. But this story is also a nice reminder to not take any of it personally. Because sometimes all it takes is ten minutes, and a little compassion, for things to go back to normal again.

Hopefully the dad holds onto these notes to re-read aloud one day. At his son’s wedding perhaps. Or his 21st birthday.