I didn’t understand male privilege until I became a stay-at-home dad

When my wife returned to work after parental leave, I took my first trip to the grocery with two kids.

Little did I know I would return home feeling like a hero.

On a Monday morning, I pushed the green cart with flame decals through the second set of sliding doors and toward the deli. My 3-year-old son was strapped in the seat and my 3-month-old son was wrapped against my chest.

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I saved my 'virginity' for marriage, and it worked out great — until it didn't.

In 1993, at the tender age of 14, I took a pledge.

I promised not to have sex until my wedding night and to find a man who would honor that promise too.

I was taught that my body belonged to God, first and foremost, and then one day it would also belong to my husband. Then it would belong to my babies (and there would be babies, without a doubt).

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Unlearning toxic masculinity can be difficult. Here are a few role models who can help.

We talk a lot about toxic masculinity.

It seems like people are starting to confound the meaning of the term.

"Oh, so you're saying that masculinity is TOXIC," they say. "That's SEXIST against MEN," they say.

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Casey Affleck dropping out of the Oscars should motivate us all.

A lot has changed in just a year.

Last year Brie Larson presented Casey Affleck with the Oscar for Best Actor, and it was ... uncomfortable.

Just a year earlier, Larson had won the Oscar for her powerhouse performance in "Room," playing a woman who was held kidnapped, sexually assaulted, and forced to live in captivity with her young son. Hers was a moving performance that reflected a lot of Larson's own advocacy work for victims of sexual harassment and violence. But then she was asked to present one of acting's top honors to Affleck, who had been sued on multiple occasions for sexual harassment years earlier.

The audience erupted in applause as Affleck's name was announced and he took the stage — with one very notable exception: Larson. After offering Affleck a polite hug, she stood off to the side, motionless. In a pre-#MeToo, pre-Time's Up environment, her reluctance to follow the unspoken rules of being a presenter was a statement in itself.

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