Why your choice not to have kids is awesome.

Sometimes it seems like childless adults can't win for losing. That sucks.

I think we can all agree that women are under a lot of scrutiny. A lot.

We are almost always too fat — unless we cross over and become “disgustingly thin“ or a “skinny bitch.“


Photo used with the author's permission.

We are expected to behave, and we hear these commands all the time:

“Smile!”

“Sit up!”

“Don’t be pushy!”

“Don’t be too loud!”

“You are too opinionated!”

“Act like a lady!”

Wait, are those last four said only to me? No, I’m pretty sure they are universal.

We are constantly under observation.

“Sure, she lost some weight, but now her face sags.”

“I think she has had some work done.”

“She has cankles and her left eye is lazy.”

From where I sit, women can’t win for losing. This goes double for moms.

“I don’t know why she even had kids if she is never home.”

“She just lets those kids walk all over her.”

“She is a mess! If you can’t handle the stress, don’t have kids!”

Talking about not being able to win for losing, try that, women. Try not having kids. That will surely keep all that criticism away.

Oh wait — no it won’t.

You want to open yourself up to a huge stinking pile of judgment? Just be a childless female over 30.

Even worse, a married childless female over 30 — a woman who chooses not to have a child.

I have never been a childless female over 30, so I am not speaking from experience. But I can tell you that I have never heard anything good offered up about women who exercise their right to live their life in a way that suits them.

Photo via pixabay.

I can also tell you that when I meet a woman who has chosen not to have children, she often confesses that right away. Sometimes she will share this information apologetically, sometimes with a bit of compensating bravado, and sometimes just as a warning or heads-up that I may find her pristine ovaries all too much and take leave of her company forthwith.

Women would not be so preemptively defensive if they didn’t get a ton of crap for not having a kid.

Here is a list about why we should not dump crap on childless woman, aptly titled:

Why giving people shit for not having babies is messed up.

Photo via Mateus Lunardi Dutra/Flickr.

1. It is their body, their life, and their choice.

That’s right, people. Women are actually autonomous creatures with lots to offer the world besides their uteruses. They are not extensions of a man who can breed with them; they are not cattle impregnated for the good of the farm; they are not the unpaid nannies of the world, continuing the species, alone, on their exhausted shoulders.

They are humans, living in a society and oh so very capable of personal choice.

2. Overpopulation.

Seriously, folks, before you start laying into people about how “they must experience children, for they are God’s gift“ — think about the fact that God has been a little too generous with the gifts when we consider what the planet can sustain. God is like the uncle who brings us a puppy and a drum set. They seem like a good idea, but sometimes we have no place to put the drum set and now we have to feed and care for the puppy.

I know I am opening myself up to major critique with this point, as I have so many “littles,” but that is just my point. When I encounter people who have opted for a childless life, I thank them.

3. Poverty.

This is a very real consideration. It even has a name — the feminization of poverty — with lone mothers experiencing the highest risk for extreme poverty because their income is insufficient to feed their children.

Before we get all high and mighty as we look down on women who choose to lower their risk of destitution, maybe we should stop a moment to think about it as a wise choice.

If as a society we are so hell-bent on every womb being sacred and therefore obligated to hold human life, perhaps we should help a mother out now and again.

Players all be like:

“Have a baby! Have a baby! Have a baby!”

Then:

“Girl, why you have a baby when you can’t take care of it!??!!!”

Can’t win for losing.

4. Babies can kinda suck.

You know, I love me some babies. I am a total addict; I always need to hold them — I will even ask complete strangers if I can hold their babies. And thank God I have a fertile family that pops those little poopers out every few years because there is nothing better than baby head smell.

Buuuuuut ... truth be told, babies can suck the life right out of you, too. You give up your body to make them and your sleep and sanity to raise them. And you get to deeply understand the phrase “this is why we can’t have nice things” for at least 20 years.

When the littles are young, you spend every moment making sure they don’t die, and when they are older, you spend every moment fixing stuff they have broken or looking for stuff they have taken.

I love my kids. But realistically, parenting is not for everyone. Maybe it's not even for most people.

If social pressure did not exist and we had a really clear picture of what it's like to raise children before having them, I think our overpopulation problem would fix itself in a generation.

So, to people who do not have children: You are perfectly complete and amazing.

You have to answer to no one about your mindful decisions and your powerful choices.

You are going to have more time and disposable income than those of us who made a different choice, so good for you! I hope you use both in ways that make your life and the world even better.

Photo via iStock.

The mandate that you must have children to be a “real woman“ is completely false.

You are real. How could anyone ever tell you otherwise?

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Should a man lose his home because the grass in his yard grew higher than 10 inches? The city of Dunedin, Florida seems to think so.

According to the Institute of Justice, which is representing Jim Ficken, he had a very good reason for not mowing his lawn – and tried to rectify the situation as best he could.

In 2014, Jim's mom became ill and he visited her often in South Carolina to help her out. When he was away, his grass grew too long and he was cited by a code office; he cut the grass and wasn't fined.

France has started forcing supermarkets to donate food instead of throwing it away.

But several years later, this one infraction would come back to haunt him after he left to take care of him's mom's affairs after she died. The arrangements he made to have his grass cut fell through (his friend who he asked to help him out passed away unexpectedly) and that set off a chain reaction that may result in him losing his home.

The 69-year-old retiree now faces a $29,833.50 fine plus interest. Watch the video to find out just what Jim is having to deal with.

Mow Your Lawn or Lose Your House! www.youtube.com

Cities

The world officially loves Michelle Obama.

The former first lady has overtaken the number one spot in a poll of the world's most admired women. Conducted by online research firm YouGov, the study uses international polling tools to survey people in countries around the world about who they most admire.

In the men's category, Bill Gates took the top spot, followed by Barack Obama and Jackie Chan.

In the women's category, Michelle Obama came first, followed by Oprah Winfrey and Angelina Jolie. Obama pushed Jolie out of the number one spot she claimed last year.

Unsurprising, really, because what's not to love about Michelle Obama? She is smart, kind, funny, accomplished, a great dancer, a devoted wife and mother, and an all-around, genuinely good person.

She has remained dignified and strong in the face of rabid masses of so-called Americans who spent eight years and beyond insisting that she's a man disguised as a woman. She's endured non-stop racist memes and terrifying threats to her family. She has received far more than her fair share of cruelty, and always takes the high road. She's the one who coined, "When they go low, we go high," after all.

She came from humble beginnings and remains down to earth despite becoming a familiar face around the world. She's not much older than me, but I still want to be like Michelle Obama when I grow up.

Her memoir, Becoming, may end up being the best-selling memoir of all time, having already sold 10 million copies—a clear sign that people can't get enough Michelle, because there's no such thing as too much Michelle.

Don't like Michelle Obama? Don't care. Those of us who love her will fly our MO flags high and without apology, paying no mind to folks with cold, dead hearts who don't know a gem of a human being when they see one. There is nothing any hater can say or do to make us admire this undeniably admirable woman any less.

When it seems like the world has lost its mind—which is how it feels most days these days—I'm just going to keep coming back to this study as evidence that hope for humanity is not lost.

Here. Enjoy some real-life Michelle on Jimmy Kimmel. (GAH. WHY IS SHE SO CUTE AND AWESOME. I can't even handle it.)

Michelle & Barack Obama are Boring Now www.youtube.com

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via EarthFix / Flickr

What will future generations never believe that we tolerated in 2019?

Dolphin and orca captivity, for sure. They'll probably shake their heads at how people died because they couldn't afford healthcare. And, they'll be completely mystified at the amount of food some people waste while others go starving.

According to Biological Diversity, "An estimated 40 percent of the food produced in the United States is wasted every year, costing households, businesses and farms about $218 billion annually."

There are so many things wrong with this.

First of all it's a waste of money for the households who throw out good food. Second, it's a waste of all of the resources that went into growing the food, including the animals who gave their lives for the meal. Third, there's something very wrong with throwing out food when one in eight Americans struggle with hunger.

Supermarkets are just as guilty of this unnecessary waste as consumers. About 10% of all food waste are supermarket products thrown out before they've reached their expiration date.

Three years ago, France took big steps to combat food waste by making a law that bans grocery stores from throwing away edible food.According to the new ordinance, stores can be fined for up to $4,500 for each infraction.

Previously, the French threw out 7.1 million tons of food. Sixty-seven percent of which was tossed by consumers, 15% by restaurants, and 11% by grocery stores.

This has created a network of over 5,000 charities that accept the food from supermarkets and donate them to charity. The law also struck down agreements between supermarkets and manufacturers that prohibited the stores from donating food to charities.

"There was one food manufacturer that was not authorized to donate the sandwiches it made for a particular supermarket brand. But now, we get 30,000 sandwiches a month from them — sandwiches that used to be thrown away," Jacques Bailet, head of the French network of food banks known as Banques Alimentaires, told NPR.

It's expected that similar laws may spread through Europe, but people are a lot less confident at it happening in the United States. The USDA believes that the biggest barrier to such a program would be cost to the charities and or supermarkets.

"The logistics of getting safe, wholesome, edible food from anywhere to people that can use it is really difficult," the organization said according to Gizmodo. "If you're having to set up a really expensive system to recover marginal amounts of food, that's not good for anybody."

Plus, the idea may seem a little too "socialist" for the average American's appetite.

"The French version is quite socialist, but I would say in a great way because you're providing a way where they [supermarkets] have to do the beneficial things not only for the environment, but from an ethical standpoint of getting healthy food to those who need it and minimizing some of the harmful greenhouse gas emissions that come when food ends up in a landfill," Jonathan Bloom, the author of American Wasteland, told NPR.

However, just because something may be socialist doesn't mean it's wrong. The greater wrong is the insane waste of money, damage to the environment, and devastation caused by hunger that can easily be avoided.

Planet

The world is dark and full of terrors, but every once in a while it graces us with something to warm our icy-cold hearts. And that is what we have today, with a single dad who went viral on Twitter after his daughter posted the photos he sent her when trying to pick out and outfit for his date. You love to see it.




After seeing these heartwarming pics, people on Twitter started suggesting this adorable man date their moms. It was essentially a mom and date matchmaking frenzy.

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