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A mom asked if it's appropriate to make a babysitter do housework and set the internet on fire

They're just sitting there while my kids sleep.

babysitting; motherhood; parenting; working parents; babysitter cleaning
Photo by Alexander Dummer on Unsplash

Should babysitters be expected to clean?

When it comes to babysitting, you can hit the jackpot with someone who not only enjoys hanging out with your kiddos but also cleans out of boredom. The only babysitter I've had that experience with is my mom, but I do hear they do exist. While walking into a spotless house after a much-needed night out would be amazing, it's not really part of a standard babysitting package.

Typically, whoever babysits for you is solely there to focus on the well-being of your children. They feed them snacks, play games with them, and follow their bedtime routine to the letter. Then they hang out on your couch reminding Netflix that they're still watching and wait for you to return. Sure, they clean up dishes from dinner and whatever toys were pulled out during their time with your kids, but they don't typically clean your house.

But in a private parenting group I belong to, a long debate was started when a mom asked a group of 260k of her closest friends if it would be appropriate for a parent to ask a babysitter to clean their home.

The anonymous mom explained that her college-aged daughter had recently started babysitting for a family, but on the second day, her duties suddenly changed. There was a list of chores waiting for the babysitter that included cleaning the family's dishes and cleaning up messes that were there before the sitter arrived.

This revelation set off a firestorm of comments with many agreeing that anything outside of cleaning up after the children while they're in your care is a separate job. But not everyone was on the same page and it was clear that this was a topic that was going to cause some intense debate. Since summer months are here, there's no wonder this topic is coming up and views are split.

woman holding kid in the street

Should babysitters be expected to clean, one mom asks.

Photo by Sai De Silva on Unsplash

Scary Mommy recently published an article posing a similar question, only this was coming from a parent who wanted her babysitter to clean while her children slept. Elizabeth Narins explains that she and her husband are stretched thin and have an active toddler she jokingly calls a "toy tornado."

"Given the amount of housework that clearly needs to be done, paying someone to sit on our toy-covered couch during naps or after bedtime just seems... inefficient," Narins wrote before posing the question. "Is it completely out of line for me to ask her to declutter when my kids are in bed?"

Whether it's the expert interviewed for the Scary Mommy article or the parents in the private group, there does seem to be one common theme among the discourse: Any additional chores should be clarified in the original job description, and if it wasn't, then it should be directly brought up in a conversation with the babysitter.

Many parents in the comments believed that a housekeeper should be hired in addition to the babysitter, while others thought the babysitter should be offered more money for the additional work. But there were several people who thought it was just common courtesy for a babysitter to clean the house while the kids were asleep.

It may seem that you're paying a babysitter to do nothing while your children sleep, but you're paying them to be there in the event of an emergency. No matter which side of the debate you're on, it seems proper communication about expectations will save everyone a headache in the future.

Do you think cleaning should be expected from a babysitter?


This article originally appeared on 6.8.23

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Education

Unearthed BBC interview features two Victorian-era women discussing being teens in the 1800s

Frances 'Effy' Jones, one of the first women to be trained to use a typewriter and to take up cycling as a hobby, recalls life as a young working woman in London.

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Two Victorian women discuss being teens in the 1800s.

There remains some mystery around what life was like in the 1800s, especially for teens. As time marches on, we're moving further and further away from the Victorian era and what life was like for the people living through it. Thankfully, though, relics have survived that are not just historical treasures, but connections our human family now since passed. In this rediscovered 1970s clip from the BBC, two elderly women reminisce about what it was like being teenagers during a time when the horse and buggy was still the fastest way to get around.

While cars were just around the corner from being the common mode of transportation toward the end of the 19th century, it's pretty wild to imagine what these women experienced. Frances "Effy" Jones explained how, at age 17, she was encouraged by her brother to check out this new machine in a storefront window. Turns out that machine was a typewriter and, after being trained on how to use it, Jones would sit in the store window typing while people outside gathered to watch. Before long, classes began popping up for women to learn how to use a typewriter, starting a new movement for women of that era.

The second woman, Berta Ruck, told the BBC that she would get into a bit of trouble at boarding school for drawing instead of completing school work. This talent took Ruck to art school in London where she rode buses around town, attempting to avoid mud getting on her long skirt. But Ruck explained that it never worked and she would spend hours brushing the mud from her skirt before wearing it out again. I'm sure you're thinking, buses? They weren't the buses we would see nowadays. These were double-decker horse-pulled carriages. It may be hard to imagine, but life was just as vibrant and bustling then as it is now. Check out the video below to learn more:


This article originally appeared three years ago.

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Pop Culture

What is 'Generation Jones'? The unique qualities of the not-quite-Gen-X-baby-boomers.

This "microgeneration" had a different upbringing than their fellow boomers.

Photo Credits: Michelle Obama, US Department of Education, Lawrence Jackson

Generation Jones includes Michelle Obama, George Clooney, Kamala Harris, Keanu Reeves and more.

We hear a lot about the major generation categories—boomers, Gen X, millennials, Gen Z and the up-and-coming Gen Alpha. But there are folks who don't quite fit into those boxes. These in-betweeners, sometimes called "cuspers," are members of microgenerations that straddle two of the biggies.

"Xennial" is the nickname for those who fall on the cusp of Gen X and millennial, but there's also a lesser-known microgeneration that straddles Gen X and baby boomers. The folks born from 1954 to 1965 are known as Generation Jones, and they've been thrust into the spotlight as people try to figure out what generation to consider 59-year-old Vice President Kamala Harris.

Like President Obama before her, Harris is a Gen Joneser—not exactly a classic baby boomer but not quite Gen X. Born in October 1964, Harris falls just a few months shy of official Gen X territory. But what exactly differentiates Gen Jones from the boomers and Gen Xers that flank it?

"Generation Jones" was coined by writer, television producer and social commentator Jonathan Pontell to describe the decade of Americans who grew up in the '60s and '70s. As Pontell wrote of Gen Jonesers in Politico:

"We fill the space between Woodstock and Lollapalooza, between the Paris student riots and the anti-globalisation protests, and between Dylan going electric and Nirvana going unplugged. Jonesers have a unique identity separate from Boomers and GenXers. An avalanche of attitudinal and behavioural data corroborates this distinction."

Pontell describes Jonesers as "practical idealists" who were "forged in the fires of social upheaval while too young to play a part." They are the younger siblings of the boomer civil rights and anti-war activists who grew up witnessing and being moved by the passion of those movements but were met with a fatigued culture by the time they themselves came of age. Sometimes, they're described as the cool older siblings of Gen X. Unlike their older boomer counterparts, most Jonesers were not raised by WWII veteran fathers and were too young to be drafted into Vietnam, leaving them in between on military experience.

Gen Jones gets its name from the competitive "keeping up with the Joneses" spirit that spawned during their populous birth years, but also from the term "jonesin'," meaning an intense craving, that they coined—a drug reference but also a reflection of the yearning to make a difference that their "unrequited idealism" left them with. According to Pontell, their competitiveness and identity as a "generation aching to act" may make Jonesers particularly effective leaders:

"What makes us Jonesers also makes us uniquely positioned to bring about a new era in international affairs. Our practical idealism was created by witnessing the often unrealistic idealism of the 1960s. And we weren’t engaged in that era’s ideological battles; we were children playing with toys while boomers argued over issues. Our non-ideological pragmatism allows us to resolve intra-boomer skirmishes and to bridge that volatile Boomer-GenXer divide. We can lead."

Time will tell whether the United States will end up with another Generation Jones leader, but with President Biden withdrawing his candidacy, it has now become a distinct possibility.

Of note in discussions over Kamala Harris's generational status is the fact that generations aren't just calculated by birth year but by a person's cultural reality. Some have made the argument that Harris is culturally more Gen X than boomer, though there doesn't seem to be any record of her claiming any particular generation as her own. However, a swath of Gen Z has staked their own claim on her as "brat"—a term singer Charli XCX thrust into the political arena with a post on X that read "kamala IS brat." That may be nonsensical to most older folks, but for Gen Z, it's a glowing endorsement from one of the top Gen Z musicians of the moment.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Joy

Dedicated pizza guy got a $2 tip delivering on a snowstorm. A cop noticed and changed his life.

He was delivering in an affluent neighborhood, too.

via GoFundMe

A heroic pizza delivery man.

A story out of Indiana shows a point that we often prove on Upworthy: even though some people out there do wrong, there are far more folks out there willing to do what’s right. Connor Stephanoff, an employee for Rock Star Pizza in Indiana, braved his way a half mile through a snowstorm wearing sneakers and sweatpants to deliver $40 worth of pizza to a home in an affluent neighborhood. All he got for a tip was $2.

Officer Richard Craig, who goes by Officer Craig on TikTok, saw the delivery man’s incredible effort to get the pizza to the right home, recorded it on video and posted it to TikTok. His dedication astounded the officer, but he couldn’t believe how the young man was treated. “Look at this man. This man walked through hell and high water to deliver a pizza,” Craig said in the video. But he was shocked to learn how cheap the tip was. “Absolutely insane. Do better folks,” he said.



@officercraig $2 TIP SHOULD BE A CRIME! Whoever did this: #SHAMEFUL ROCKSTAR PIZZA HAS A ROCKSTAR DRIVER. (Brownsburg, IN.) This guy is a RARE breed. During today’s all day snowstorm, crashes and slideoffs were coming in near 30 calls an hour. This school bus had a minor crash. The bus slid backwards and sideways down a hill and gets stuck, blocking this neighborhood street, and making it completely impassable. The roads were so bad, it took us 20 min. to get 3-4 miles. THIS #DELIVERYDRIVER pulled up before officers arrived. The delivery was about 1/4 mile past where the bus was blocking the street. This young man did not allow this to discourage him. He didn’t call his manager to complain, he didn’t call the customer and tell them their $40 pizza order could not be delivered. Oh no. THIS MAN IS BUILT DIFFERENT. He would not be discouraged by the obstacles he was encountering, which included a 1/2 mile hike round trip in the cold, wet snow. He parked his vehicle at the top of the hill, got out, wearing grey sweats, Nikes, and NO COAT nor GLOVES. He grabbed this #RockstarPizza, and took off hiking thru the very cold, and wet snow with the pizza in tow. It was the beginning of his shift at 4:30p on a Friday afternoon, BUT he was determined this family got their pizza. This is in a more affluent neighborhood, and I’m sure he thought he would be rewarded properly for his RARE display of PRIDE and DEDICATION to his work- that is often times not seen by some of his generation. But more so, he wanted to ensure this family got their pizza to their door! So they did not have to leave the confines of their warm, comfortable, AND VERY NICE home. He got my attention as I see him walking in the middle of street after he made the delivery. I said outloud “what does this guy think he is doing?” As I initially thought he was a neighbor coming to “rubberneck” the crash. The bus driver told me he walked by once and was delivering a pizza. I didn’t believe that fully because what young pizza delivery guy in 2025 would do this??? None that I know! Not believing it completely, I hit RECORD and ask this young man. I was dumbfounded and in disbelief when he confirmed. But most of all - I was impressed- AND STILL AM! I’m proud to witness this firsthand. But my excitement and pride quickly turned to frustration when I asked him about his tip. WHO TIPS A GUY WHO RISKS EVERYTHING TO DRIVE FOOD TO YOUR DOOR LIKE THIS?? Let alone, gets out to hike it to you while every road was nearly impassable! I REALLY HOPE this algorithm is good enough that whomever DID THIS, SEES THIS! You should be ashamed of yourself whoever u are!! SHAME ON YOU. A $40 pizza delivered and a $2 tip! EVERYONE IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD CAN AFFORD IT. AND IF THEY CANT, STOP ORDERING PIZZA YOU CANT AFFORD! After processing he only received $2, and what I just witnessed, I reached for my own wallet. To PAY THE TIP FOR SOMEONE THAT PROBABLY MAKES DOUBLE MY SALARY. But I did not want this young man discouraged. Unfortunately my wallet was in my Tahoe, which was at the top of the big hill. I quickly as I could chased him down up the hill giving him the little cash I had in my wallet. (About $15) HE DESERVED MUCH MORE. Not sure who this guy is, BUT IF YOU DO, PLZ TAG HIM, SHOW HIM SOME ❤️❤️❤️ AND GIVE HIM THE RECOGNITION HE DESERVES! Well done sir.🫡#IncredibleWork #Rockstar #Brownsburg #Indiana #delivery #Driver #snow #PizzaGuy #pizza @Dave Portnoy #LifeLawAndFootball #dedicated #workethic @Pat McAfee Show Clips ♬ original sound - Officer Craig




How much should I tip for a pizza?

NerdWallet suggests that people tip a pizza delivery person the amount they'd pay for a regular sit-down dinner, 15% to 20%. However, it notes that you should add more if the pizza is delivered in poor weather conditions. So, in this situation, the people who received the pizza should have at least tipped $7, which is still cheap considering the weather.

The officer then posted a follow-up video in which he gave a better look at the icy terrain Stephanoff had to walk through. He noted that he was in an affluent neighborhood where most people should be able to afford a decent tip, especially for a guy who went above and beyond.



@officercraig Replying to @Brooklyn Johnson-Waterman Luckily I had a little cash in my wallet that was in the truck! BUT HE DESERVES MUCH MORE. I just started his GoFundMe! Please share and encourage others to throw in if they can!! I want to try to get him a tip he deserves -if we can!! Let’s go! https://gofund.me/2d6f19ec. #OfficerCraig #RockStarPizzaBrownsburg #PizzaDeliveryDriver #RockstarDriver #GoFundMe #fyp #foryou #LifeLawAndFootball ♬ original sound - Officer Craig



After the videos went viral, Craig started a GoFundMe campaign for the delivery man to reward him for his efforts and prevent him from becoming discouraged. “I witnessed firsthand the work ethic, dedication, and determination by this young man while I was on the scene of a crash during Friday's snowstorm here in Indiana," he wrote on the GoFundMe page. "He received just a $2 tip - from a home in a very affluent neighborhood."

“I ran to my police vehicle to grab my wallet to give him the little cash that I had (about $15) which I didn’t feel is enough," he added. "I would LOVE to raise at least $500 for this guy!" As of January 23, the fundraiser has earned over $31,000.

Stephanoff’s heroic effort to deliver a pizza earned him praise from his boss, Rock Star Pizza manager Ron Mathews. "He wasn't here in the restaurant; he had no idea people were watching him. But he got out, walked it to the house, and came back without any expectations,” Mathews told WRTZ.

Matthews told NBC affiliate WSAZ that Stepahnoff’s story is a reminder that many folks have it rough these days and to look out for one another. “Everyone is going through it tough. Everyone has it. It could be you. It could be the delivery driver. But at the end of the day, we’re all people," he said. "Just be nice to the next person."

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Science

Can't comprehend the 4th dimension? Carl Sagan explains it with an apple in this classic clip.

Sagan was a master science communicator.

via Carl Sagan Planetary Society/Wikimedia Commons and John Finkelstein/Pexels

Carl Sagan and a sliced apple

The concept of the fourth dimension seems beyond human comprehension. As three-dimensional beings, we are unable to see beyond a physical object's height, width and depth. What else could there be?

Enter Carl Sagan, revered as one of the greatest science communicators of his time. He possessed a unique gift for demystifying complex scientific concepts, making them accessible and thrilling for the general public. In 1980, on Episode 10 of the groundbreaking PBS show “Cosmos,” Sagan embarked on a mission to explain the seemingly impossible fourth dimension.

What’s excellent about Sagan’s explanation is that he uses simple and relatable objects: an apple and a Tesseract, or a hypercube.

Sagan began by discussing how a two-dimensional being living in a flat world would perceive a three-dimensional object like an apple.

“Imagine we live in this ‘flatland’/2-D plane with no concept of ‘up’ or ‘down.’ Then along comes a 3-D object like an apple. We do not even notice it until it crosses our plane of existence — and even then, we have no idea what the apple is,” Sagan explains. “We see only a fragment as it passes through our plane. There is no way we can comprehend the 3-D quality/dimension of the apple, because it is more than we can understand. We only have the evidence of what has passed through our plane.”

Sagan then related this two-dimensional experience of the third dimension to how we might try to understand the fourth. To do so, he used the Tesseract, a four-dimensional cube, to demonstrate how difficult it is for us to perceive or visualize dimensions beyond our own three. At this point, Sagan is asking the viewer to expand their minds to understand the fourth dimension metaphorically.

Sagan’s demonstration of the fourth dimension isn’t just a wonderful explanation of a scientific idea that many of us find difficult to comprehend; it’s also a great example of how to teach complex ideas by combining clear explanations with thought-provoking visuals.


This article originally appeared last year.

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Joy

Teen honors local UPS driver with a tiny public diorama and his reaction is so wholesome

Brandon is beloved in the community.

Images courtesy of Andrea Hanson/Instagram

Brandon the UPS driver checks out the art installation made in his honor.

Service workers help our communities run more smoothly, but their contributions can often go unrecognized. In some instances, however, people in service jobs become household names and beloved fixtures in their community.

A UPS driver named Brandon is apparently one of those people in Red Wing, Minnesota.

Red Wing resident Andrea Hanson shared how her 14-year-old daughter Mari created a delightful art installation called "Petite Postal Place Featuring: Brandon." Set in a tiny box, the square diorama includes shelves of mini boxes and packages with incredible detail, right down to the Amazon Prime packaging and barcodes, with Brandon the UPS driver standing among them.

Hanson shared a video on Instagram of Brandon's reaction to seeing the art installed next to the postal box in his honor, and it's so wholesome. "Shut up!" he kept saying. "I love it…that is the coolest thing ever."

Watch:

Brandon clearly appreciated the gesture—"She made that just for me, though?"—and was blown away by Mari's attention to detail—"The Chewy box!"

Other people also loved the art as well as Brandon's reaction to it:

"Bless all delivery drivers!!!! You have no idea how much that made his day!"

"It’s the 'shut up' and the '4H' and 'fair' giving me those MN vibes. Love this so much."

"“Wait til my buddies see this” awwwwwww.❤️"

"Love his reaction. Saying he’s gonna share with his friends at work. 🥹"

"That is so cool!!! She is very VERY talented! 👏👏 And that is the cutest reaction ever. 🥹🥹"

"Love this. ❤️ His genuine appreciation and love he felt. Nice job!"

Mari's art is part of the Art in the Alley community initiative "designed to turn overlooked spaces in downtown Red Wing into vibrant, engaging places, through the power of community art." The people of Red Wing are encouraged to add something artistic to spaces like the alley where Mari put her art piece and to go check out what others have done.

Mari shared a description of "Petite Postal Place Featuring: Brandon" on the city's downtown website along with her history with art:

photo of mini diorama"Petite Postal Place Featuring: Brandon" by Mari HansonPhoto courtesy of Andrea Hanson

A miniature postal room with shelves filled with packages. Brandon the UPS man is standing proudly in front of the boxes, ready to deliver parcels with his radiant personality. Bio: Once I had the capability to hold a marker, I have been creating artwork. One thing that has been on my Christmas list every year is art supplies. Our dining table was always filled with clay, markers, paint, and paper. When my Dad moved to a new office in the house, I got his old one (which is now turned into my art room). It is filled with every art supply imaginable and is all in its own organized spot. Now I spend hours there every day, creating whatever I think up.

Hanson shared with Upworthy's audience on Instagram that her daughter was thrilled that her art has been making the viral rounds and that Brandon has been tickled by it as well:

"I just want to say that my daughter is so overwhelmed and grateful you’re seeing her hard work. She’s not on social media yet…only 14. But I’ve shown her you cheering her on to never quit making art. 🫶🏻 You are making a difference in her life. And Brandon feels like a rockstar. (Which he is!) Such well deserved love for our local UPS guy. He deserves a raise!!! ❤️"

It's heartening to see community being celebrated in so many ways here, from Brandon's obviously stellar service to Mari's appreciation through art to the community encouraging artistic expression to the people of the internet sharing the love. There may be a whole lot of ick in the world, but shared joys like this are potent reminders that humanity can be a force for good.

This article originally appeared last year.

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