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Parenting

Mom is blown away when she asks daughter to finish toxic phrases from her childhood

"This healed something in me."

mom, daughter, trauma, generational trauma, childhood
Photo by Adam Winger on Unsplash

Mom and daughter heal generational trauma.

One of the most redeeming things about being a parent is the opportunity to right parenting wrongs from childhood. Healing generational trauma and breaking chains for a new generation is a powerful parenting gift.

And TikToker Brandi Davis (@brandi_davis24) is trying to do just that. Following a trend that began on Instagram, Davis asked her young daughter to finish some "toxic phrases" she grew up hearing throughout her childhood. Her daughter's responses show that her upbringing has truly been different.

"Asking my daughter to finish these phrases I heard growing up healed me a little bit," she captioned the video. "Her answers 🥺 breaking one generational curse at a time!!"

@brandi_davis24

Her answers 🥺 breaking one generational curse at a time!! #breakinggenerationalcurses #wholesome #disciplinephrases #fyp #trending #mommy #mommydaughter #lovehersomuch

In the video, Davis is sitting in her car with her daughter. She tells her, "I'm gonna start a sentence, and you're just gonna finish it with whatever you think it's supposed to say, okay?" Her daughter agrees, and she begins to say toxic phrases to her that she heard throughout her childhood.

"I brought you into this world so," Davis says, and her daughter replies, "I'm beautiful." Davis responds, "You're beautiful!" (The phrase is: I brought you into this world so/and I can take you out of it.)

"When we go in this store don't," Davis says, and her daughter replies, "Don't run away." (The phrase is: When we go in this store don't/ask for anything.)

"Children are for," Davis says, and her daughter replies, "Attention!"(The phrase is: Children are for/being seen not heard.)

She continues with more questions. "I'm going to give you something," Davis says, and her daughter replies, "Cuz I'm good!" (The phrase is: I'm going to give you something/ to cry about.)

"I love you but," Davis says, and her daughter take a while to reply. "Any answer is okay. It's not a trick," Davis encourages her as she thinks. Ultimately, she can't come up with one. (The phrase is: I love you but/I don't like you.) Davis adds in a caption, "I love that she couldn't think of a 'but' because she knows there is never a 'but' after with me."

The emotional video resonated with viewers in the comment section:

"This healed something in me. You’re doing a great job 🤍,"

"This baby has been nothing but loved and protected her whole life 💐🥹 cheers to you mama 💐."

"Gosh makes me realize how toxic our parents generation was and how much we are breaking those chains for our kids."

I’m a 43 year old man, the kid inside me does not know how to respond to this but feel happy for your daughter and it pointed out some darkness I was not aware of in my childhood."

"The fact I didn’t have to read and knew what the rest of it was… and her little pure heart had no clue 😭😭 definitely made me tear up. Good job mama."

This trend began on Instagram with mental health activist and parent Anna Muller (@annakristinam). She shared a video asking her young son the same questions, captioning it, "Seeing how my son finishes toxic parenting phrases." The video garnered over eight million views, and since then has become a trend on TikTok.

In a follow-up video to her original on Instagram, Muller shared more on the trend in her caption. "Thank you everyone for all the love on my previous video 😭 this trend is so wholesome and it’s so beautiful to see the parents breaking generational cycles and the kind humans we are raising together 🤍," she wrote.

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Planet

45 years ago, Carl Sagan beautifully explained the fourth dimension with just an apple

Sagan was the Mister Rogers of complex scientific concepts.

via Carl Sagan Planetary Society/Wikimedia Commons and John Finkelstein/Pexels

Carl Sagan used a sliced apple to perfectly explain the fourth dimension.

The concept of the fourth dimension seems beyond human comprehension. As three-dimensional beings, we are unable to see beyond a physical object's height, width and depth. What else could there be? Even if you understand the concept, it is almost impossible to picture it in your mind, which is bound by the limits and realities of the physical world around us.

Enter Carl Sagan, revered as one of the greatest science communicators of his time. Perhaps best known for his research into extraterrestrial life, he was one of the first people to demonstrate that life could have existed on Mars. Sagan possessed a unique gift for demystifying complex scientific concepts, making them accessible and thrilling for the general public. If you never had the pleasure of watching him on television, you could imagine him as something of a Scientific Mister Rogers. Friendly, a wonderful storyteller, and always able to distill difficult lessons into their simplest form.

In 1980, on Episode 10 of the groundbreaking PBS show “Cosmos,” Sagan embarked on a mission to explain the seemingly impossible fourth dimension.


carl sagan, cosmos ,4th dimension, 3-D, 4-D, 2-D, physics, theoretical physics, math, science, space, spacetime, einsteinA great communicator and handsome, to boot.Giphy

Many of us have commonly heard of time being considered the fourth dimension. That's not so hard to understand — in order to locate an object in the universe, you'd need to know three dimensions of its spatial location and also the time during which it exists.

But there is also a more theoretical and harder to understand place, where all four dimensions are spatial. It is nearly impossible for any of us to comprehend... without the help of a gifted teacher.

What’s excellent about Sagan’s explanation is that he uses simple and relatable objects: an apple and a Tesseract, or a hypercube.

carl sagan, cosmos ,4th dimension, 3-D, 4-D, 2-D, physics, theoretical physics, math, science, space, spacetime, einsteinSagan explains that if an apple existed in a 2-dimensional space, anyone living in this "flatland" would only see a cross-section of it at a time.Giphy

"In discussing the large scale structure of the cosmos, astronomers sometimes say that space is curved. Or that the universe is finite but unbound," Sagan begins. "Whatever are they talking about?"

Yeah, this guy gets it.

Sagan then goes on to explain how a two-dimensional being living in a flat world would perceive a three-dimensional object like an apple.

Watch his full explanation here. It's hypnotic and entertaining and incredibly enlightening.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com


“Imagine we live in this ‘Fllatland’/2-D plane with no concept of ‘up’ or ‘down.’ Then along comes a 3-D object like an apple. We do not even notice it until it crosses our plane of existence — and even then, we have no idea what the apple is,” Sagan explains. “We see only a fragment as it passes through our plane. There is no way we can comprehend the 3-D quality/dimension of the apple, because it is more than we can understand. We only have the evidence of what has passed through our plane.”

To further demonstrate, Sagan stamps the apple into an inkpad and then onto the surface in front of him, which represents Flatland and all of its inhabitants. Inside Flatland, the apple exists only as its points of contact on the paper; or four small dots. He adds that as the apple passes through the 2-dimensional Flatland, its cross-section changes. So someone living in that plane of existence would experience the apple as an ever-shifting and rearranging set of shapes or objects. Wild!

Sagan then related this two-dimensional experience of the third dimension to how we might try to understand the fourth. To do so, he used the Tesseract, a four-dimensional cube, to demonstrate how difficult it is for us to perceive or visualize dimensions beyond our own three.

carl sagan, cosmos ,4th dimension, 3-D, 4-D, 2-D, physics, theoretical physics, math, science, space, spacetime, einsteinA tesseract can not exist in 3-dimensional space, but it can be approximated the same way a cube can be drawn on paper.Giphy

Sagan explains that the tesseract is a cube expanded into a 4th dimension, but "I cannot show you a tesseract because I, and you, are trapped in three dimensions." But what he can do is show us a 3-dimensional rendering of one. Just like a cube can be drawn and approximated (or cast a shadow) onto a piece of paper, a 4-dimensional tesseract can be imperfectly represented in 3-dimensional space. Still following?

At this point, Sagan is asking the viewer to expand their minds to understand the fourth dimension metaphorically. Though we cannot see it or even properly visualize it, that doesn't mean that the things we can see can't offer clues and lessons about the fourth dimension.

Studying 4-dimensional space can help in our understanding of the universe around us. Just because we see and experience only three dimensions doesn't mean that's all that exists. It's critical for physicists and mathematicians to be able to understand and map these theoretical spaces to better comprehend things we otherwise can not explain. Remember the ever-changing, rearranging set of shapes as the apple passes through Flatland?

Sagan’s demonstration of the fourth dimension isn’t just a wonderful explanation of a scientific idea that many of us find difficult to comprehend; it’s also a great example of how to teach complex ideas by combining clear explanations, everyday concepts everyone can understand, and brilliant storytelling.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Pets

Australian Shepherd gets creative with 'talk buttons' to warn family of impending disaster

His owners had no idea what he meant until they discovered the source of a strange smell.

@letsgoripley/TikTok, used with permission

What a smart doggo: Australian Shepherd Ripley uses talk buttons to warn family of a pending disaster.

Dogs seem to intuitively understand human emotions, and they can be trained to understand and respond to a nearly unlimited number of words, phrases, or commands. Some experts say smarter breeds can learn hundreds of different prompts! It makes you wonder how far off they really are from being able to truly communicate with us using something resembling language.

People have been wondering and experimenting with the idea for a long time. Speech-language pathologist Christina Hunger and her dog Stella were the first to experiment with talking buttons in 2019, where Stella could press a button with her nose to activate a word sound, thereby speaking, in a sense. Since then there has been a surge of online content showing other pet parents using similar kits to communicate with their own pups.

The most fascinating aspect of this phenomenon is the question of whether or not canines are able to understand full-blown complicated sentences beyond “treat” and “outside.”

While the overall jury is still out on that, scientifically speaking, dogs like Ripley — a 2-year-old Australian Shepherd — seem to make an incredibly compelling case for believing the hype.


og talk buttons, australian shepherd, dogs, dog intelligence, animals, pets, animal intelligence, funny, viral videosAn Australian Shepherd like Ripley. Photo by Ilona Frey on Unsplash

Ripley has an entire TikTok account documenting his impressive talk button journey, along with 85,000 followers. But a video posted on March 28, 2024, feels next-level.

In the clip, Ripley presses the “smell” button as his parents eat lunch. When that doesn’t get their attention, he begins to bark.

“What do you smell?” a voice finally asks. To which Ripley replies “outside,” followed by “gardens.”

Confused, someone asks, “It smells like the gardens outside?”

Ripley’s parents had apparently just started a load of laundry before making lunch, and the detergent had been spilling all over the floor from the washing machine. Ripley had been smelling the detergent, which was reminiscent of the gardens outside.

Unfortunately, they didn’t put two and two together until after they went back to the laundry room and saw the rapidly worsening mess.

Hence the moral of the story: “You should always listen to your dog.”


@letsgoripley

He’s so freakin’ smart! #Talkingdog #letsgoripley #ripleytalks #fluentpet #australianshepherd #dogs

Ripley’s amazing feat prompted lots of praise from over a million viewers.

“All of the treats,” one person wrote.

Another added, “I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, he is brilliant.”

"He was so mad y'all weren't moving," someone joked.

"This is amazing!!! It’s a good thing it wasn’t an emergency like a fire or something dangerous!!!! You both seemed a little slow to realize that she was trying to warn you of something off/strange!!!" said another.

Others were quick to compliment the breed. And rightfully so, as Australian Shepherds are known for their remarkable intelligence, as well as their strong drive and exuberance, according to the American Kennel Club. They thrive when they have a job, and the way Ripley jumped into action is a pretty great example of this characteristic.

The whole account is pretty remarkable. In another popular video, Ripley uses the buttons to demand to see his grandma (who, no doubt, gives him lots of treats). In another, he can be seen asking for water and alerting his humans that he smells food. His owners insist that he understands what they're saying to him and uses the buttons to communicate, not just for rewards and praise.

@letsgoripley

Ripley really loves his Grandma! This happened multiple times this day. This was the first time. Stay tuned… 🐶 #australianshepherd #fluentpet #talkingdog #dogswhotalk #dogmom #dogdad #puppy #doglover #grandma #smartdog #aussiesoftiktok #puppylove

So, while we might not have definite evidence for the efficacy of talk buttons, one thing remains abundantly clear—our dogs are trying to communicate with us in whatever way they can. All we need to do is listen.

Check out even more of Ripley's talk button shenanigans on TikTok.

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Family

Middle-class families share how much they have in their savings accounts and it's eye-opening

"We make the most money we ever have and have zero savings. We live paycheck to paycheck and every month I don’t know how we get by."

Photo by Karolina Kaboompics/Pexels

Many middle class families are sharing that they have nothing in savings right now.

According to an April 2024 Gallup poll, 54% of Americans identify as part of the middle class, with 39% identifying as "middle class" and 15% identifying as "upper-middle class." That percentage has held fairly steady for years, but what it feels like to be a middle-class American has shifted for many.

Notably, inflation caused by the pandemic has hit middle-class families hard, with incomes not keeping up with cost-of-living increases. Housing costs have skyrocketed in many areas of the country, mortgage interest rates have risen to levels not seen since the pre-Obama era, and grocery bills have increased significantly. One government study found that the cost of living has increased between around $800 and $1,300 a month, depending on the state, since 2021, putting a squeeze on everyone, including the middle class.

How much money do middle-class Americans have in their savings accounts?

One woman shared that her family is just getting by and asked other middle-class people to "chime in" with what they have in their savings accounts.

@abbyy..rosee

somethings gotta give #savings #middleclass #relatable

"I swear, every paycheck I am putting money into my savings, but needing to transfer it back within a few days," shared @abbyy..rosee on TikTok. "My registration is due. My husband's registration is due. He needed two new tires, even though they had a warranty. That's $300. My oldest needs braces, he needs a palate expander, that's $120 a month. Not to mention groceries are $200 more a week. Forget about feeding your family great ingredients because who has $500 a week to spend on perfect ingredients to feed your family?"

middle class, cash, savings, family finances, dollar bills, A depressed couple doing their bills.via Canva/Photos

She explained that her husband makes enough money that they should be able to live comfortably, and that she quit her job because the cost of daycare was more than she was making.

"At some point, something has to give," she said. "What is going on? How do I save money?"

People in the comments chimed in with their savings account totals and it was quite eye-opening. Many people shared that they have $0 saved.

"We make the most money we ever have and have zero savings. We live paycheck to paycheck and every month I don’t know how we get by."

"I think the middle class is 1 personal disaster away from bankruptcy."

"Y’all got savings accounts?!?! 😂"

"I used to freak out if I had under $10k in savings, now I’m happy when I have over $150. 😫"

"We make almost 100,000 a year with no savings!!!! It's always something!!"

"I'm lucky if we have $500-$1K for an emergency. Every single time we start saving, something happens: the vet, the cars, the kids... something."

"Savings account? I transfer money each paycheck but always end up needing to transfer it back. My husband makes great money too but we are scraping by."

"$803 but we have to pay a $750 deductible this week b/c my Husband hit a deer soooo… back at it 😭 It’s exhausting. Constantly draining it, refilling it, transferring."


middle class, cash, savings, family finances, dollar bills, An upset couple doing their bills.via Canva/Photos

Some people shared that they do have some savings, but several said it was because they'd had an inheritance or other chunk of money come their way. Many people shared that their savings has dwindled as increased costs have taken their toll. Some people gave lifestyle advice to save money, but most agreed that just the basics have gotten so expensive it's harder to make ends meet much less put extra into savings.

Thankfully, the inflation issue appears to be waning, but even just plateauing at their current financial reality isn't ideal for many American families. Middle class is supposed to be a comfortable place to be—not rich, but well enough off to feel secure. That's not how many middle class folks feel, though. Most Americans don't have anything close to the amount of money saved that is recommended across the age spectrum, but at least hearing that others are in the same boat is somewhat comforting.

middle class, cash, savings, family finances, dollar bills, An upset couple doing their bills.via Canva/Photos

Further, a 2024 study found that 37% of Americans can't afford an unexpected expense over $400, and nearly a quarter of them don't have any emergency savings at all. “Not all surprises are good, and people know it. The study suggests financial precarity at a time when household finances may be stretched due to rising prices and inflation,” says Rebecca Rickert, head of communications at Empower. “Life happens, and people are stressed about the surprise expenses that could tip them off-balance.”

It can be vulnerable to share your financial reality, but it's helpful to hear what other people are doing and dealing with so we all feel less alone when we're struggling. Perhaps if people were more open about money, we'd all be able to help one another find ways to improve our financial situations rather than lamenting our empty savings accounts and wondering how to change them.

This article originally appeared last year.

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Pop Culture

Two brothers Irish step dancing to Beyoncé's country hit 'Texas Hold 'Em' is pure delight

The Gardiner Brothers and Queen Bey proving that music can unite us all.

Gardiner Brothers/TikTok (with permission)

The Gardiner Brothers stepping in time to Beyoncé's "Texas Hold 'Em."

In early February 2024, Beyoncé rocked the music world by releasing a surprise new album of country tunes. The album, Renaissance: Act II, includes a song called "Texas Hold 'Em," which shot up the country charts—with a few bumps along the way—and landed Queen Bey at the No.1 spot.

As the first Black female artist to have a song hit No. 1 on Billboard's country music charts, Beyoncé once again proved her popularity, versatility, and ability to break barriers without missing a beat. In one fell swoop, she got people who had zero interest in country music to give it a second look, forced country music fans to broaden their own ideas about what country music looks like, prompted conversations about bending and blending musical genres and styles, and gave the Internet a crash course on the Black roots of country music.

And she inspired the Gardiner Brothers to add yet another element to the mix—Irish step dance.

In a TikTok that's been viewed over 42 million times, the Gardiner Brothers don cowboy hats while they step in time to "Texas Hold 'Em," much to the delight of viewers everywhere.

Watch:

@gardinerbrothers

Beyoncé 🤝 Irish dancing #beyonce #countrymusic

Michael and Matthew Gardiner are professional Irish-American step dancers and choreographers who have gained international fame with their award-winning performances. They've also built a following of millions on social media with videos like this one, where they dance to popular songs, usually in an outdoor environment.

The melding of Irish dance with country music sung by a Black American female artist may seem unlikely, but it could be viewed merely as country music coming back to its roots. As mentioned, country music has roots in Black culture and tradition. One major staple of the country music genre, the banjo, was created by enslaved Africans and their descendants during the colonial era, according to The Smithsonian. The genre also has deep roots in the ballad tradition of the Irish, English and Scottish settlers in the Appalachian region of the U.S. Despite modern country music's struggle to break free from "music for white people" stereotypes, it's much more diverse than many realize or care to admit, and Queen Bey is simply following tradition.

banjo, country music, country, roots, genreMan playing banjo.Canva Photos

People are loving the blending of genres and culture that the TikTok exemplifies.

"Never thought I’d see Irish step dancing while Beyoncé sings country," wrote on commenter. "My life is complete. ♥️"

"So happy Beyoncé dropped this song and exposed my timeline to diversified talent 👏🏽👏🏽," wrote another.

"Beyoncé brought the world together with this song 😭," offered another person.

"Ayeeee Irish Dancing has entered the BeyHive chatroom… WELCOME!! 🔥🔥🔥" exclaimed another.

"I don’t think I can explain how many of my interests are intersecting here," wrote one commenter, reflecting what several others shared as well.

The Beyoncé/Gardiner Brothers combo and the reactions to it are a good reminder that none of us fit into one box of interest or identity. We're all an eclectic mix of tastes and styles, so we can almost always find a way to connect with others over something we enjoy. What better way to be reminded of that fact than through an unexpected mashup that blends the magic of music with the delight of dance? Truly, the arts are a powerful uniting force we should utilize more often.

And for an extra bit of fun, the Gardiner Brothers also shared their bloopers from filming the video. Turns out stepping in the rain isn't as easy as they make it look.

@gardinerbrothers

Beyoncé Bloopers #texasholdem #gardinerbrothers

This article originally appeared last year.

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Animals & Wildlife

34-year-old orangutan learns how to tie knots, and now we're wondering what else he can do

Could an orangutan learn to braid hair? The people want to know.

Metro Richmond Zoo/TikTok

Patrick the orangutan is a knot-tying master.

We've all heard the stories about how intelligent the great apes are, the great apes being a family of primates that include chimpanzees, orangutans, gorillas, and bonobos. There've been many famous cases of gorillas learning sign language, caring for kittens, or otherwise showing pretty astounding human-like behaviors.

Remember Koko, the famous gorilla who knew over 1,000 American Sign Language gestures? Her language proficiency may have been overestimated at the time, but she did help to completely change the way we view the intelligence and capabilities of the great apes. More recently there was Kanzi, a bonobo, who showed amazing proficiency at understanding and communicating with language. Kanzi once demanded the materials for s'mores, made his own fire, and roasted his own marshmallows!

The next famous great ape just might be Patrick the chimpanzee, a resident at the Metro Richmond Zoo.

orangutan, animals, zoo, great apes, monkeys, chimpanzees, animal intelligence, viral, funny, amazingPuffy cheeks called flanges are a sign of attractiveness and dominance in orangutans. Photo by CHUTTERSNAP on Unsplash

In a video posted to TikTok, the zoo notes that Patrick just turned 34. His zookeepers gave him a royal green cloak to mark the occasion.

If he looks a little different than you're used to, it's because Patrick has especially pronounced flanges, or puffy cheeks. Not all males have flanges, but the ladies dig them. So those big old cheeks are just one more reason Patrick is a total stud.

In the video, we see Patrick wrap the cloak around himself and tie it into a perfect knot. It's absolutely astonishing to watch. It's maybe less impressive than some of the greatest feats accomplished by Koko and Kanzi, but there's something so human about the moment. It makes you view these animals in a completely different light. Just watch him pull the knot tight and then double-knot it to make sure it won't budget. Amazing!

Watch the viral moment here:

@metrorichmondzoo

Patrick turns 34, receives a royal cloak, and then ties the perfect knot - because even jungle royalty needs a signature look! 👑🦧✨ King behavior. #metrorichmondzoo #rva #orangutans #patricktheorangutan


5 million people viewed the video and were left in awe. They were also left wondering: What else can Patrick do?

Commenters had some interesting ideas:

"Now give him a fitted sheet and see what he can do"

"why do I feel like he could french braid my hair better than I can"

"Has anyone ever hugged him and if so what was it like?"

People were jokingly convinced that Patrick could speak, but chose not to:

"100% believe the conspiracy that they can talk but dont because they dont want humans to know"

Patrick isn't the first orangutan to tie knots. They've been observed doing it in the wild, and their weaving and tying skills are considered an extension of their nest-building behaviors.

orangutan, animals, zoo, great apes, monkeys, chimpanzees, animal intelligence, viral, funny, amazingOrangutans have been observed tying knots in the wild without human instruction. Photo by Pat Whelen on Unsplash

But truly, what else can great apes do?

It was recently discovered that chimpanzees used medical plants to treat each other's wounds in the wild, in addition to using leaves to wipe themselves down after sex or pooping. This fits with the great apes well-known use of tools, but it also challenges the notion that humans are the only species that displays empathy and altruistic behaviors. Chimpanzees also have highly sophisticated memories and are capable of recalling specific events from years ago and even recognizing photos of themselves when they were younger.

Chimps and other apes have been proven to be able to perform basic math and some experts even say they have a photographic memory!

It's impossible to read all this and watch Patrick's intelligence on display without wondering whether great apes should ever be kept in captivity. They're so intelligent and capable of feeling, it seems cruel to keep them behind bars. But as conservation organizations have pointed out, many great apes simply can not be introduced back into the wild due to massive habitat loss. These creatures are endangered for a reason, and kudos go to the caring zookeepers who take care of them and help provide apes like Patrick with safe, enriching lives.

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