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'I'm 45 years old and I have never once casually, comfortably, held hands with a partner in public.'

"I'm 45 years old and I have never once casually, comfortably, carelessly held hands with a partner in public."

Do you think much about the simple, seemingly small things you do in public?

Most of us probably don't give too much thought to holding hands. It's small, right? But for some people, everyday gestures are anything but small. As Panti explains, for many gay people, holding hands is a big deal.


Instead of simply walking down the street, doing your thing, being happy, you're looking around, seeing who's there, trying to decide if it's even worth holding hands. And if you think, "Yeah, we're doing this," then you have to wonder if someone will hurt you for it.

Those small gestures, though, are what make us human.

And when you can't do the small human things without a great deal of thought, it takes a toll.

On a large scale, Panti says that homophobia drives people to mistreat LGBTQ people.

What is homophobia, anyway?

"So, gay people are going to destroy the institution of marriage. Gay couples will be wandering through orphanages picking babies off shelves, trying to find one that matches their new IKEA sofa. Or that allowing gay people to get married will destroy society itself.

... Now, of course, the other real driver of homophobia — and you can all clutch your pearls here because I'm going to go here — is a disgust with gay sex. In particular with gay male sex... They feverishly imagine that we spent all day jumping around buggering each other ... and, in fact, what they actually do is reduce us down to this one sex act whether or not we do it at all. Because we are not regular people with the same hopes and aspirations and ambitions and feelings as everyone else. We are simply walking sex acts."

It's time we stop tolerating it.

People are people. We are all people. And we all deserve to be treated the same.

Watch Panti's full talk because it's truly inspiring.

Are you a fan of equality? You can share this incredible talk. Maybe someone who needs to see it will.

All illustrations are provided by Soosh and used with permission.

I have plenty of space.

This article originally appeared on 04.09.16


It's hard to truly describe the amazing bond between dads and their daughters.

Being a dad is an amazing job no matter the gender of the tiny humans we're raising. But there's something unique about the bond between fathers and daughters.

Most dads know what it's like to struggle with braiding hair, but we also know that bonding time provides immense value to our daughters. In fact, studies have shown that women with actively involved fathers are more confident and more successful in school and business.

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Identity

This blind chef wore a body cam to show how she prepares dazzling dishes.

How do blind people cook? This "Masterchef" winner leans into her senses.

Image pulled from YouTube video.

Christine Ha competes on "Masterchef."

This article originally appeared on 05.26.17


There is one question chef Christine Ha fields more than any other.

But it's got nothing to do with being a "Masterchef" champion, New York Times bestselling author, and acclaimed TV host and cooking instructor.

The question: "How do you cook while blind?"

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This story first appeared on the author's Medium and is reprinted here with permission.

Because you're a girl.

This article originally appeared on 04.14.17


I was promoted a few weeks ago, which was great. I got a lot of nice notes from friends, family, customers, partners, and random strangers, which was exciting.

But it wasn't long until a note came in saying, “Everyone knows you got the position because you're a girl." In spite of having a great week at a great company with great people whom I love, that still stung, because it's not the first time I've heard it.

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Gordon Ramsay at play... work.

This article originally appeared on 04.22.15


Gordon Ramsay is not exactly known for being nice.

Or patient.

Or nurturing.

On his competition show "Hell's Kitchen," he belittles cooks who can't keep up. If people come to him with their problems, he berates them. If someone is struggling to get something right in the kitchen, he curses them out.

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This article originally appeared on 01.27.20


From 1940 to 1945, an estimated 1.3 million people were deported to Auschwitz, the largest complex of Nazi concentration camps. More than four out of five of those people—at least 1.1 million people—were murdered there.

On January 27, 1945, Soviet forces liberated the final prisoners from these camps—7,000 people, most of whom were sick or dying. Those of us with a decent public education are familiar with at least a few names of Nazi extermination facilities—Auschwitz, Dachau, Bergen-Belsen—but these are merely a few of the thousands (yes, thousands) of concentration camps, sub camps, and ghettos spread across Europe where Jews and other targets of Hitler's regime were persecuted, tortured, and killed by the millions.

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Health

What I realized about feminism after my male friend was disgusted by tampons at a party.

"After all these years, my friend has probably forgotten, but I never have."

Photo by Josefin on Unsplash

It’s okay men. You don’t have to be afraid.

This article originally appeared on 08.12.16


Years ago, a friend went to a party, and something bothered him enough to rant to me about it later.

And it bothered me that he was so incensed about it, but I couldn't put my finger on why. It seemed so petty for him to be upset, and even more so for me to be annoyed with him.

Recently, something reminded me of that scenario, and it made more sense. I'll explain.

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