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Being mentally ill doesn't mean you can't help others. Just ask this therapist.

It’s no secret that the field of mental healthcare attracts individuals who’ve receivedmental healthcare themselves. Most of us become therapists because we’ve either needed therapy or benefitted from it. (Or both!)

I’m a child and family therapist. I also happen to have my own mental illness.

While some may argue that my mental illness impacts my work in a negative way, I believe it provides me with additional insight and skill. I’m a therapist with mental illness and, while my work is challenging, I’m better because of it.


The truth is, mental illness runs in most families. But in mine? It sprints. From relatives in prison to alcoholism, I’ve got it all in my lineage.

Jealous? Don’t fret, you probably have it too, even if you’re blissfully unaware.

Current theories state that most of us have a genetic tendency toward mental illness imprinted in our DNA.

But it's our environment and experiences that determine whether or not those tendencies are ever activated.

These “switches” get activated by what we refer to as adverse childhood experiences (or ACES). When we have a high number of ACES, we are more likely to suffer from addiction, maladaptive behavior, and mental illness.

I have a high ACES score. I am reminded of this every time I go to a training on trauma (which is often, since I am, after all, a trauma therapist).

I go through bouts of depression and occasional anxiety and have recovered from an eating disorder, but what’s pervasive for me is my complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PSTD).

How does this manifest?

I have an addictive personality. I am sometimes a control freak. I often want to plan my every waking — and sleeping, to be honest — moment down to the minute. I demand consistency from my loved ones and flip out on them if they fail to meet my standards.

I have sensory processing issues that leave me unable to function at Wal-Mart on a crowded Sunday afternoon (as in, I've left a full cart of items in the middle of the store and ran for the door, tears streaming down my face).

I have mood swings and migraines. I have somatic symptoms, including eczema and fatigue. When engaged in conflict, I tend to cry and shut down, running away from conversations that could help me grow if I just gave myself a chance.

So I’m complicated to love (and even to be around!) much of the time. But you know what else?

I’m compassionate as f*ck to any, all, and every being on this earth.

I feel your pain, your dog’s pain, the pain of the bug under your shoe — I feel all of it. Sometimes I feel pain so you don’t have to.

I can carry and navigate an emotional load bigger than a boulder, all while multitasking personal and professional responsibilities.

This means, as a therapist, my mental illness has provided me the tools to work through feelings with my clients.

While I don’t always allow their emotions to permeate me, I am always comfortable with the uncomfortable in my space.

That means my clients can feel safe feeling even the most difficult of emotions with me, in front of me, alongside me.

I can alter my approach to facilitate regulation and safety when emotions feel out of control and/or I can create a sort of feelings vacuum wherein a client feels safe to venture outside the lines of what they usually tolerate. They can then express the full range of a feeling to experience true processing of their trauma.

Practically speaking, I have self-care and coping skills coming out my ears and am happy to help clients learn to use journaling, yoga, creating a support system, mindfulness, art, and a hundred other skills to start feeling better in their daily life from the moment they walk through my door.

The most valuable thing about being a therapist with mental illness is that I get it.

I know how desperate you feel to change your life while you seem paralyzed and unwilling to do anything different. I understand how intimidating both therapy and emotions can be when you’ve experienced trauma. I know that not all trauma is war-zone, house-burning-down stuff, and I believe clients when they tell me they’ve experienced traumatic things, no matter how small or insignificant they’ve been told those things are.  

And, by tapping into my own experiences, I can help my patients cope with, accept, or overcome their issues — maybe even better than I could without my mental illness.

This story originally appeared on Ravishly and is reprinted here with permission. More from Ravishly:

All images provided by Prudential Emerging Visionaries

Collins after being selected by Prudential Emerging Visionaries

True

A changemaker is anyone who takes creative action to solve an ongoing problem—be it in one’s own community or throughout the world.

And when it comes to creating positive change, enthusiasm and a fresh perspective can hold just as much power as years of experience. That’s why, every year, Prudential Emerging Visionaries celebrates young people for their innovative solutions to financial and societal challenges in their communities.

This national program awards 25 young leaders (ages 14-18) up to $15,000 to devote to their passion projects. Additionally, winners receive a trip to Prudential’s headquarters in Newark, New Jersey, where they receive coaching, skills development, and networking opportunities with mentors to help take their innovative solutions to the next level.

For 18-year-old Sydnie Collins, one of the 2023 winners, this meant being able to take her podcast, “Perfect Timing,” to the next level.

Since 2020, the Maryland-based teen has provided a safe platform that promotes youth positivity by giving young people the space to celebrate their achievements and combat mental health stigmas. The idea came during the height of Covid-19, when Collins recalled social media “becoming a dark space flooded with news,” which greatly affected her own anxiety and depression.

Knowing that she couldn’t be the only one feeling this way, “Perfect Timing” seemed like a valuable way to give back to her community. Over the course of 109 episodes, Collins has interviewed a wide range of guests—from other young influencers to celebrities, from innovators to nonprofit leaders—all to remind Gen Z that “their dreams are tangible.”

That mission statement has since evolved beyond creating inspiring content and has expanded to hosting events and speaking publicly at summits and workshops. One of Collins’ favorite moments so far has been raising $7,000 to take 200 underserved girls to see “The Little Mermaid” on its opening weekend, to “let them know they are enough” and that there’s an “older sister” in their corner.

Of course, as with most new projects, funding for “Perfect Timing” has come entirely out of Collins’ pocket. Thankfully, the funding she earned from being selected as a Prudential Emerging Visionary is going toward upgraded recording equipment, the support of expert producers, and skill-building classes to help her become a better host and public speaker. She’ll even be able to lease an office space that allows for a live audience.

Plus, after meeting with the 24 other Prudential Emerging Visionaries and her Prudential employee coach, who is helping her develop specific action steps to connect with her target audience, Collins has more confidence in a “grander path” for her work.

“I learned that my network could extend to multiple spaces beyond my realm of podcasting and journalism when industry leaders are willing to share their expertise, time, and financial support,” she told Upworthy. “It only takes one person to change, and two people to expand that change.”

Prudential Emerging Visionaries is currently seeking applicants for 2024. Winners may receive up to $15,000 in awards and an all-expenses-paid trip to Prudential’s headquarters with a parent or guardian, as well as ongoing coaching and skills development to grow their projects.

If you or someone you know between the ages of 14 -18 not only displays a bold vision for the future but is taking action to bring that vision to life, click here to learn more. Applications are due by Nov. 2, 2023.
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