At 11:21 a.m. on Wednesday, June 15, 2016, Sen. Chris Murphy took the floor of the Senate, vowing not to leave until his colleagues agreed to take action on gun control.
For nearly 15 hours, Murphy — with the help of more than 30 other senators — delivered a series of speeches in hopes of getting the Senate to take action on two amendments. The first amendment would require background checks for guns purchased online or at gun shows and the second would be on whether or not to prevent people on the "no fly" terror watch list from buying guns.
It was a long shot, but after the massacre in Orlando, Murphy wasn't about to sit idly by.
Photo by Pete Marovich/Getty Images.
The filibuster's most powerful moment came at its closing when Murphy shared the story of Dylan Hockley, a 6-year-old who was killed during the 2012 Sandy Hook shooting.
Dylan was one of 20 students who died at Sandy Hook Elementary School on Dec. 14, 2012. Dylan's teacher Anne Marie Murphy (no relation to the senator) died trying to shield the child from gunfire.
Photo by John Moore/Getty Images.
Sen. Murphy challenged his colleagues to follow in the footsteps of Dylan's brave teacher.
"Anne Marie Murphy made the most courageous decision that anyone could imagine," said Senator Murphy. "Instead of running, instead of hiding, instead of panicking, Anne Marie Murphy found Dylan Hockley and embraced him. Know why we know that? When the police entered the classroom, that’s how they found Dylan Hockley. Dead. Wrapped in the embrace of Anne Marie Murphy."
"It doesn’t take courage to stand here on the floor of the United States Senate for two hours or six hours or 14 hours. It doesn’t take courage to stand up to the gun lobby when 90% of your constituents want change to happen. It takes courage to look into the eye of a shooter and instead of running, wrapping your arms around a 6-year-old boy and accepting death as a trade for just a tiny little bitty piece of increased peace of mind for a little boy under your charge."
GIF via C-SPAN.
By night's end, Murphy got what he wanted: assurance that the Senate would hold votes on the amendments.
It's doubtful either will pass, but getting these amendments to the floor for an up or down vote is a strong start. The NRA stands in opposition to both amendments. GOP presidential candidate Donald Trump, however, supports banning members of the terrorist watch list and says he plans to speak with the gun advocacy group.
We need to fight against the impulse to by cynical. We need to believe that change can happen.
It's a huge and welcome relief to see Murphy and his colleagues in the Senate working to make that change happen.
Orlando, Virginia Tech, Sandy Hook, Fort Hood, San Bernardino, Aurora — the list of preventable gun tragedies goes on. It's easy to feel cynical, to lose hope for change. After all, the country didn't take any meaningful action on gun control after 20 children were gunned down in Newtown.
But on Wednesday, June 15, 2016, Chris Murphy showed that while sweeping change might still be a ways off, change is possible.
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12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women
We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.
Men and the feels.
Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.
In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.
Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?
IS IT?
Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.
Encourage.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Sharing ideas.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."
Email requests.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
Idea sharing.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.
Sexism.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.
Mansplain.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.
Mistakes.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.
Promotions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.
Rude.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.
Interruptions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.
Collaboration.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.
Disagreements.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!
In conclusion...
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.
About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.
The comedic book cover.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.
This article was originally published on March 25, 2019.