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Man lists 8 not fun, but very important things you need to start doing as an adult.

"Welcome to being an adult. Maybe you weren't told this by your parents, but this is through my trial and error."

adulthood, life hacks, life advice
@johnfluenzer/TikTok

8 things you should be doing as an adult. Spoiler alert—none of them are fun.

Who among us hasn’t come into full adulthood wishing they had known certain things that could have made life so so so much easier in the long run? Choices that, if made, ultimately would have been much better for our well-being…not to mention our wallets.

But then again that is all part of growing older and (hopefully) wiser. However there is something to be said about getting advice from those who’ve been there, rather than learning the hard way every single time.

Thankfully, a man who goes by @johnfluenzer on TikTok has a great list of things young people should start doing once they become adults. Are any of his suggestions fun, cool or trendy? Not at all. But they are most definitely accurate. Just ask any 30+-year-olds who wished they had done at least four of these things.

John started off by saying, “welcome to being an adult. Maybe you weren't told this by your parents, but this is through my trial and error."

Listed below are the eight vital things to maintaining a healthy adulthood, that most of us have no idea about until well into adulthood.

1. Getting an annual doctor visit.

annual checkup

young woman visiting her doctor

Canva

This is the bare minimum amount of visits one should be making, according to John. He recommended more if you “have more medical concerns.”

2. Dental visits. For a yearly cleaning at the very least.

dentist near me

Woman at the dentist

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"Keep in mind that a $300 cavity can turn into a $1,500 root canal, which can then turn into a $2,000 crown on top of the $1,500 you just paid, so it's better to just pay the $300 or whatever it is for a cavity, and just get it sorted,” he explained.

As someone with this exact experience (ignored a cavity because she didn't want to pay $300, only to pay $1500 years later, even with insurance) I can ruefully confirm.

…as can others, judging by the comments sections to John’s video.

“I didn’t go to the dentist for 8 years and now I need a root canal. Learn from my mistakes people,” one person wrote.

Seriously, no amount of flossing and avoiding sugar can make up for a professional cleaning and checkup, folks.

Last note on this subject—John mentioned that if you couldn’t afford to go to a dentist, to check for nearby dental schools that can often perform necessary procedures at a fraction of the cost.

Though he specifically mentioned dental schools in Canada, that is also an option in America. Things I wish I had known as a 20-year-old…

3. Next up, John suggested that if you are sexually active, to get checked for STDs/STIs.

std check, std clinic

an image of STD tests

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“If you're uncomfortable with your GP, or you don't have a GP, go to a sexual health clinic…. Just go get tested — it's better to know,” he said.

4. Get vaccines. “Be up on your vaccines, not just your flu shot."

vaccine near me

A man having just got a vaccine.

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"We're talking Hep A/Hep B, and also if you're under 25, get your Gardasil 9. It's three shots. It prevents the cancer-causing HPV,” he explained.

And while he mostly discussed the free health care options found in Canada, HPV vaccines are covered by most insurances in the US. Plus there are other potentially free/low cost resources, such as the Vaccines for Children (VFC) program for those under 19.

5. Then get a PEP, aka Post-exposure prophylaxis, if you had a “risky sexual encounter” and are worried about having contracted HIV.

pep near me

Image of pills

Canva

For this one, time really is of the essence. The sooner a PEP is taken, the more effective it is at preventing HIV, and must be taken within 72 hours of possible exposure to HIV.

Gotta say…list time 3-5 seem particularly important, as many young people are not given thorough sex education.

6. Rent. Everyone’s favorite.

rent prices, apartment near me

Image of a piggy back with a reminder to pay rent.

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John explains that especially in a housing crisis, “your rent should be the first thing you take care of every month."

"It comes before everything. Now maybe if you have kids and they need to eat, of course, that's important," he added. "But a roof over their head is way more important and you do not want to give landlords any excuse to have you evicted. Pay your rent and pay it on time."

7. Hold onto that cellphone as long as possible.

cheap cellphone, lowering cellphone bill

Woman holding a cellphone

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“I know we all want the new cell phones.Keep your phone as long as possible, OK?" he said. "I don't care if it's any iPhone 10, iPhone 8, keep it for as long as possible. Especially if you're under no contract—you have so much freedom.”

Instead of getting a new phone, John suggested switching providers every month to get special deals and save “$40–50 bucks a month,” which, as we all know, really adds up.

8. Only have one streaming subscription a month.

netflix, hbo, showtime, hulu

There's not need to have more than one streaming service at a time.

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This one was admittedly “controversial,” John shared, but in his point of view, it’s a no brainer.

“You don't need Netflix, Disney, Hulu, whatever... you don't need them all the same month. January do Netflix, cancel. February do Hulu... All of these different apps, they let you save watchlists, right, like 'My List.' And if you cancel your subscription and you restart it two months later, your list is still there. So just save stuff, only pay for it once a month, and try to save some money,” he suggested.

What a wake up call, right? But other hardened adults couldn’t help but agree with John.

“This is very good advice, can confirm (unfortunately) as a fellow adult lol,” one person wrote.

Others appreciated how he took the time to share this list to help younger people avoid some pretty disheartening setbacks.

“I love people like you so much, just her to help others in life. People like you are so important because you didn’t have to make this video but you did.”

You can’t always trust what you hear on TikTok, but John’s advice is sound. What most life hacks seem to have in common, other than a healthy blend of common sense and 20/20 hindsight, is that it puts some form of security at the forefront—not necessarily instant gratification. Fun is so important, but as anyone with experience will tell you, peace of mind is priceless.

Watch the full video below:

@johnfluenzer #greenscreen Here is my list if things you jeed to start doing once you’re an adult! I know its not fun bit I wish someone had told me when I was younger. #genz #genalpha #adultingishard ♬ original sound - John

This article originally appeared on 12.10.23

Pets

Four guys asked their new neighbor if they could walk her dog. Then the dog wrote back.

"If you ever get bored, we are more than happy to look after him/her."

via Stevieticks / Instagram

A black dog and a note form "the boys from number 23."

If you've lived your whole life with a dog, a home has to feel pretty empty without one. Your heart has to feel like there's something missing as well. When Jack McCrossan, originally from Scotland, moved to Bristol, England with his three friends, they were bummed out to learn that their landlord didn't allow dogs.

So when they saw a beautiful black Sheprador (a German Sheppard Lab mix) in their neighbor's window, they knew that had to become buddies with her. They wrote the dog's owner, Sarah Tolman, a letter asking to arrange a play date with the dog. "If you ever need someone to walk him/her, we will gladly do so," they wrote.

"If you ever get bored (we know you never will, but we can dream), we are more than happy to look after him/her. If you want to come over and bring him/her to brighten our day, you are more than welcome. If you want to walk past our balcony windows so we can see him/her, please do," the letter continued.


"We hope this doesn't come too strong, but our landlord won't allow pets, and we've all grown up with animals. The adult life is a struggle without one," they wrote. "Yours sincerely, The boys from number 23," the letter concluded.

Soon after, the boys in 23 received a response from the dog herself, Stevie Ticks, accepting the offer. However, it may have been written by her human, Sarah Tolman. In the letter, Stevie shares a bit about herself, saying she's two years and four months old, was adopted in Cyprus, and that she's "very friendly and full of beans." (The boys shouldn't worry about a gassy hound, in England, "full of beans" means lively.)


"I love meeting new people and it would be great if we can be friends. I must warn you that the price of my friendship is 5 x ball throws a day and belly scratches whenever I demand them," the letter continued. A few days later, the boys got to meet Stevie. "Meeting Stevie was great!" McCrossan told Buzzfeed. "She was definitely as energetic as described. We got to take her for a walk and she wouldn't stop running!"

black labrador, dogs, dog-walkers, kind nieghbors, stevieticks, bristol, ukA black labrador (representative image).via Canva/Photos

Tolman thought the boys' letter was a fantastic gesture in an era where, quote often, neighbors are strangers. "In a day and age where people don't really know or speak to their neighbors, it was really nice for them to break down that barrier," she said. After the story went viral, she saw it as an opportunity for people to share their love of dogs with the world. "My mother and I are amazed at all the love we've received from around the world these past few days," Tolman wrote as Stevie. "If you have a doggo in your life, share that love with those around you."

A lot has changed in the past 6 years since this story warmed hearts around the globe. The boys have since moved away, but as of September 2024, Stevie is around 8 years old and still doing well. Her keeper and Sarah's partner, Chris Bowley, shared an update on Instagram. "[The boys] sadly moved out of Bristol. However, we have always tried to keep the ethos going of Stevie having as many friends and meetups as possible," Bowley wrote.


This article originally appeared six years ago.

Humor

Millennials are revealing their 'retirement plans' with perfectly dark humor

They're known for their self-deprecating humor and didn't disappoint.

Millennials. We're house poor, but humor rich.

If there’s one thing millennials are known for, it’s their self deprecating, nihilistic humor. Usually pointing to how they weren’t exactly set up for success in life, especially when it comes to being able to afford a home, pay off student loan debt, or even get a job in the field they racked up debt for in the first place.

Basically, add three parts depression and anxiety, then top it off with obscure Disney references, and you’ve got the formula down pat. So it’s no wonder that when someone online asked millennials what their “plans” were for retirement, they went dark, and fast.

Below are some of our favorites:

Obviously, there were a few jabs about never being able to retire in the first place.

millennials, retirement for millennials, 401K, roth IRA, savings plans for millennialsMake sure you've accrued enough PTO for that funeral! Photo credit: Canva

“I'm hoping to get off work in time to attend my funeral”

“Literally my retirement age will probably be 10 years after I die. My body will be used to prop open a door by the government”

“Die at my job… Ill keel over mopping one day and that will be that. My job will be filled by that afternoon.”

“I did some financial planning and determined I can retire by the time I am 97 and can live for 11 minutes on my savings.”

A few came up with some…er…creative ways to live out their golden years.

“Maybe federal prison?”

millennials, retirement for millennials, 401K, roth IRA, savings plans for millennialsI mean, threes square meals a day…Photo credit: Canva

“Gonna listen to some Portishead while I have a sand shower at the indentured service prison camp while I daydream about increased water rations.”

“I figure there are at least three big economic busts between now and then, so I’m planning to die in a nude beach bl*w j*b jet ski shootout.”

“Live longer than everyone else in the family, inherit their stuff, retire five minutes before I die.”

"Save a lot, die before retirement, will my retirement savings to my kids so they have a chance."

“Find a nice commune and go die in the woods like a house cat.”

“The cliff scene in Midsommar.

“Cats! Cats Cats Cats Cats Cats Cats Cats”

And then, there was perhaps the most millennial response of all:

“I try not to have dreams.”

And, arguably, this gallows humor is justified, considering that, compared to both older Gen Xers/Boomers and young Gen Zers, prospects don’t generally look as promising. There are many reasons for this, including shift away from pensions toward 401(k) plans and high student debt burdens.

Still, there are reasons for millennials to be optimistic. Many employers automatically offer a matching contribution to a 401K plan. Alternatively, those without 401 K plans can set aside funds through an IRA (even $10-$20 a month can make a difference).

In fact, one savvy millennial in the above thread seems to have that strategy down:

“Maxing out my Roth IRA, nearly maxing my company's traditional 401k. Should be all good by 60 then I can do whatever I want. SS would be a nice bonus, but I'm not counting on it.”

millennials, retirement for millennials, 401K, roth IRA, savings plans for millennialsSaving, like any other skill, can be learned. Photo credit: Canva

There’s also something to be said about gaining extra income with a side hustle…though you’d be hard pressed to meet a millennial without 17 of those.

Bottom line: millennials can joke all we want, but 20-30 years can go by in the blink of an eye. We might not be equipped with the tools we thought we’d receive to succeed, and yes, times are scary and uncertain, but there are options out there. So throw on a nostalgic cartoon, and get to saving.

woman lying in a hospital bed looking out the window

It's hard to explain the relentless intensity of having young children if you haven't done it. It's wonderful, beautiful, magical and all of that—it truly is—but it's a lot. Like, a lot. It's a bit like running an ultramarathon through the most beautiful landscape you can imagine. There's no question that it's amazing, but it's really, really hard. And sometimes there are storms or big hills or obstacles or twisted ankles or some other thing that makes it even more challenging for a while.

Unfortunately, a lot of moms feel like they're running that marathon alone. Some actually are. Some have partners who don't pull their weight. But even with an equal partner, the early years tend to be mom-heavy, and it takes a toll. In fact, that toll is so great that it's not unusual for moms to fantasize about being hospitalized—not with anything serious, just something that requires a short stay—simply to get a genuine break.

moms, motherhood, exhaustion, parenting, parentingAn exhausted mom looks at her laptop while kids play in the backgroundImage via Canva

In a thread on X (formerly Twitter), a mom named Emily shared this truth: "[I don't know] if the lack of community care in our culture is more evident than when moms casually say they daydream about being hospitalized for something only moderately serious so that they are forced to not have any responsibilities for like 3 days."

In a follow-up tweet, she added, "And other moms are like 'yeah totally' while childfree Gen Z girls’ mouths hang open in horror."

Other moms corroborated, not only with the fantasy but the reality of getting a hospital break:

"And can confirm: I have the fondest memories of my appendicitis that almost burst 3 weeks after my third was born bc I emergency had to go get it taken out and I mean I let my neighbor take my toddlers and I let my husband give the baby formula, and I slept until I was actually rested. Under the knife, but still. It was really nice," wrote one mom.

"I got mastitis when my first was 4 months old. I had to have surgery, but my hospital room had a nice view, my mom came to see me, the baby was with me but other people mostly took care of her, bliss," shared another.


motherhood, moms, babies, exhaustion, mental healthAn exhausted mom holds her newborn babyImage via Canva

Some people tried to blame lackadaisical husbands and fathers for moms feeling overwhelmed, but as Emily pointed out, it's not always enough to have a supportive spouse. That's why she pointed to "lack of community care" in her original post.


They say it takes a village to raise a child, but it also takes a village to raise a mother. Without the proverbial village, we end up bearing too much of the weight of childrearing ourselves. We're not just running the ultramarathon—we're also carrying the water, bandaging the blisters, moving fallen trees out of the way, washing the sweat out of our clothes—and we're doing it all without any rest.

Why don't moms just take a vacation instead of daydreaming about hospitalization? It's not that simple. Many people don't have the means for a getaway, but even if they do, there's a certain level of "mom guilt" that comes with purposefully leaving your young children. Vacations usually require planning and decision-making as well, and decision fatigue is one of the most exhausting parts of parenting.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Strange as it may seem, the reason hospitalization is attractive is that it's forced—if you're in the hospital, you have to be there, so there's no guilt about choosing to leave. It involves no decision-making—someone else is calling the all shots. You literally have no responsibilities in the hospital except resting—no one needs anything from you. And unlike when you're on vacation, most people who are caring for your kids when you're in the hospital aren't going to constantly contact you to ask you questions. They'll leave you to let you rest.

Paula Fitzgibbons shares that had three kids under the age of 3 in 11 months (two by adoption and one by birth). Her husband, despite being very involved and supportive, had a 1.5 hour commute for work, so the lion's share of childcare—"delightful utter chaos" as she refers to it—fell on her shoulders. At one point, she ended up in the ER with atrial fibrillation, and due to family medical history was kept in the hospital for a few days for tests and monitoring.

"When people came to visit me or called to see how I was, I responded that I was enjoying my time at 'the spa,' and though I missed my family, I was soaking it all in," she tells Upworthy. "My husband understood. Other mothers understood. The medical staff did not know what to make of my cheerful demeanor, but there I was, lying in bed reading and sleeping for four straight days with zero guilt. What a gift for a new mom."

moms, motherhood, mental health, exhaustion, relaxing, relaxation A mom relaxing in a chairImage via Canva

When you have young children, your concept of what's relaxing shifts. I recall almost falling asleep during one of my first dental cleanings after having kids. That chair was so comfy and no one needed anything from me—I didn't even care what they were doing to my teeth. It felt like heaven to lie down and rest without any demands being made of me other than "Open a little wider, please."

Obviously, being hospitalized isn't ideal for a whole host of reasons, but the desire is real. There aren't a lot of simple solutions to the issue of moms needing a real break—not just an hour or two, but a few days—but maybe if society were structured in such a way that we had smaller, more frequent respites and spread the work of parenting across the community, we wouldn't feel as much of a desire to be hospitalized simply to be able to be able to rejuvenate.

This article originally appeared three years ago.

Love Stories

Wife throws husband epic surprise 45th birthday party at Costco

"I threw my Costco-loving husband a surprise party for his birthday!"

itsdanapollack/Instagram

Wife Dana Pollack threw her husband a surprise 45th birthday party at Costco.

Pulling off a surprise birthday party is a feat that not many can say they've done. But Dana Pollack (@itsdanapollack), owner of Dana's Bakery, definitely can. The mom of two pulled of an incredible birthday surprise for her husband Adam's 45th birthday at their local Costco.

She shared the epic surprise with her followers in a video on Instagram, and it was a success; Adam was totally surprised. ""I threw my Costco-loving husband a surprise party for his birthday!" she wrote in the video's caption.

"He's straight to business," she writes as the video begins with their family walking into Costco and Adam getting his game face on for their shopping trip. "Sumo oranges first, obviously," she writes in the video as they run into the first (of what will be many) friends during the excursion.

"First run in. He has no idea (yet)," she writes in the video as her husband recognizes one of his guy friends and daps him up. Dana plays it off, also exchanging general pleasantries. Soon, they run into another pal. "Second run in. He's catching on but not 100% sure...," she writes in the video as her husband says hello to another one of his friends and his wife. Adam looks at the camera and shakes his head, acknowledging how crazy it was that they saw another friend during their outing.

Meanwhile, the family continues to shop and add items to the cart as they make their way through the store. But by the third friend run-in, she writes, "The gig is up. He's onto us." The camera shows a fourth meeting, then a fifth. Clearly, it's no coincidence at all.

From there, the gang heads towards the picnic tables at the food court, and the video pans to the party's catering: Costco's cheese pizza and hot dogs, of course. "A+ catering," she writes in the video. In the comment section, Dana added that the crew ate 3 pizzas and 10 Costco chocolate chip cookies. It truly was a birthday feast of feasts.

No birthday celebration is complete without a cake, though, and Dana came prepared with a chocolate one with '45' candles. Everyone sings happy birthday to him, and once he blows out the candles, a huge applause goes up. Other patrons in the food court and walking out of Costco cheer for Adam and get in on the celebratory vibes.

Finally, the group poses for a photo at the end of the video. "Success," Dana writes. In all, 23 people came out to celebrate Adam—and her sure felt the love.

The epic Costco surprise birthday party got lots of love from Dana's followers.

"This is the most parent coded event I have ever witnessed. Come for a party, leave with your weekend errands completed 😂😂 and bring the kids," one commented.

"Wife of the year and errands are done ✅ 😂😂😂😂," said another.

"The level of WHOLESOMENESS in this video is infinite. ❤️🙌🔥"

"Lmao this many friends with Costco memberships is insane tbh," still another says, making a great point. Then again, it isCostco, so are we all that surprised?

Humor

People are sharing their favorite Mitch Hedberg jokes, 20 years after his passing

"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask where they're goin', and hook up with them later."

Comedian Mitch Hedberg

It will have been twenty years this month since comedian Mitch Hedberg passed at the age of 37, and he's still revered by many as one of the best stand-up comics who ever lived. He had a delivery unlike any other. A combo of styles that was pieced together in such a specific way that no one could quite replicate it. Sometimes it was one-liners, sometimes not—but it was always observations about life from a mind that refused to think "inside the box."

In honor of his one-of-a-kind absurdity, fans online are sharing their favorite Hedberg jokes, plus telling stories about the few lucky times they saw him perform.

Across two Reddit threads, both entitled "What's your favorite Mitch Hedberg joke?," fans were eager to share their answers

@johnny5comedyisalive

What's your favorite dwelling cheese? #mitchhedberg #comedy #standup #standupcomedy #fyp #fypcomedy

.

There were the shorter jokes:

"I’m highly opposed to picketing, but I don’t know how to show it."

"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask where they're goin', and hook up with them later."

"Dogs are always in the pushup position."

And then the longer premises with twists. (Some are performed differently than Reddit fans remember.)

Map Safety

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

“I wanna hang a map of the world in my house. Then I'm gonna put pins into all the locations that I've traveled to. But first, I'm gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won't fall down.”

My house, my choice

"I bought a two-bedroom house, but it's my choice how many bedrooms there are, isn't it? This bedroom has an oven in it. This bedroom has a lot of people sitting around watching TV. This bedroom is over in that guy's house."

Prove your donut

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

"I bought a donut. They gave me the donut and a receipt. I said, "Whoa, man, there is no need to bring ink and paper into this transaction. I give you the 50 cents, you give me the donut." I can't fathom a situation where I have to prove I bought this donut. A skeptical friend asks, "Is that your donut?" And I say, "Yeah, and I got the documentation to prove it. No wait, it's at home in the file, under D for donut."

Koala scatter

"My apartment is infested with koala bears. It's the cutest infestation ever. Way better than cockroaches. When I turn on the light, a bunch of koala bears scatter. And I do not want them to. I'm like, 'Hey… Hold on, fellas… Let me hold one of you and feed you a leaf.'"

Who can eat at a time like this?

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

“When you go to a restaurant on the weekends and it’s busy, so they start a waiting list, they say, 'Dufrene, party of two, table ready for Dufrene, party of two.' And if no one answers, they’ll say the name again: 'Dufrene, party of two.' But then if no one answers, they’ll move on to the next name. 'Bush, party of three.' Yeah, but what happened to the Dufrenes? No one seems to care. Who can eat at a time like this? People are missing. You people are selfish. The Dufrenes are in someone’s trunk right now, with duct tape over their mouths. And they’re hungry."

Of course, people didn't just relay the jokes. They talked about why the jokes worked and how Mitch would deal with one that bombed. One Redditor points out, "Even jokes that bombed were hilarious... 'Cause then he'd be like, 'Oh, that didn't work? I'm going to take all those words out and replace them with new words. That joke will be fixed.'"

The OP of the thread later revealed, in part, "The fact that all you guys know all these Mitch jokes means he was obviously an awesome Force, even though he died. And many stand-ups still talk about him fondly. He really had a different thing. He was up there with Steven Wright, and probably followed by Demetri Martin... just a fantastic style."

comedy, show, stand up, improv, stageblack and gray microphone on black stand Photo by Matthias Wagner on Unsplash


On the thread, "Almost 20 years since Mitch's death," this commenter shared, "I got to see Mitch at the DC Improv while I was a freshman or sophomore in college. A couple of years later (2005) he was coming back in town and I had tickets. I remember getting on the computer in the library to make sure the show was still happening. I saw the news that he had passed away, and like other people, I thought it was an April Fools joke."

This fan sums it up perfectly, paraphrasing one of Mitch's most recited jokes: "I used to be a fan, I still am, but I used to be too."