This week, more than 30 black women from across the country will receive the best Mother's Day gift of all: freedom.
They are among the more than half a million people (20% of the U.S. prison population) currently sitting in jail cells who have not been convicted of a crime, largely due to their inability to make bail. Some of these people are left to languish behind bars for days, weeks, months, and even years simply because they're poor.
Black women make up 44% of the female jail population though they are only 13% of the U.S. female population. Mass incarceration is devastating regardless of gender, but women are more likely to be primary caregivers, so many of these locked cells represent families torn apart.
A woman hugs her daughter at the California Institute for Women state prison. Photo by Lucy Nicholson/Reuters.
Thankfully, people across the country are joining forces to do something about this miscarriage of justice.
Mama's Bail Out Day is a coordinated effort to bail black women out of local jails while they await trial.
It's a practice that dates back to the era of American slavery, when black people would pool their resources together to buy each other's freedom.
More than a dozen organizations, including Black Alliance for Just Immigration, Color of Change, Southerners on New Ground (SONG), and local Black Lives Matter groups, came together to bring this idea to life, launching a nationwide online crowdfunding effort to buy freedom for these women and coordinating days of action against the bail system.
Pre-trial detention substantially increases the likelihood criminal conviction, mostly through the increase in guilty pleas to avoid even more time in jail. These convictions can have lasting effects on future employment, housing, and custody.
Ensuring these women can pay bail means families can stay together and black women get a better shot at justice. At home, there are more goodnight kisses. Fewer days of lost wages. More food on the table. There are no limits to the positive ripples that roll off this simple action.
A woman hugs her daughter at California Institute for Women state prison. Photo by Lucy Nicholson/Reuters.
So far, more than $250,000 has been raised for bail money, reuniting a small handful of women and their families.
These women will finally get to return to their communities, careers, and loved ones. It's a small step toward equal justice for black women, but for their families, it's absolutely everything.
"Whether it’s the mothers in the clubs who teach the young kids how to vogue, or the church mothers who took care of me," said Mary Hooks co-director of SONG, in an interview with The Nation. That's why Mama's Bail Out Day is intersectional, supporting queer, trans, disabled, immigrant, and non-traditional mothers; maternal care is not limited to one experience.
A mother and daughter wait to get visitors passes to see the girl's father at Folsom State Prison. Photo by Elijah Nouvelage/Reuters.
There's still time to contribute to the effort and give the gift of a second chance.
The system might not be set up to help these women, but we can.
Share the video, or if you're able, make a donation. Let's bring these mamas home and work to end the use of bail money for good.
An incarcerated mother hugs her children at California Institute for Women. Photo by Lucy Nicholson/Reuters.
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12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women
We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.
Men and the feels.
Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.
In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.
Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?
IS IT?
Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.
Encourage.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Sharing ideas.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."
Email requests.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
Idea sharing.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.
Sexism.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.
Mansplain.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.
Mistakes.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.
Promotions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.
Rude.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.
Interruptions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.
Collaboration.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.
Disagreements.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!
In conclusion...
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.
About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.
The comedic book cover.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.
This article was originally published on March 25, 2019.