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Retired teacher saw a lot of parenting mistakes throughout her career. This was the biggest.

Take it from someone who's seen thousands of kids grow up in the blink of an eye.

A child who disagrees with her mother.

Let's do a little bit of quick math. If an elementary school teacher starts their job immediately after finishing college and then works until they are 65, they’ll likely teach over 1,200 students and interact with around 2,000 parents. That type of experience, paired with a great understanding of children, provides teachers with incredible insight into what makes a great parent.

That experience can also help people understand where many parents need help these days. Elena Nicolaou, senior editor for “The Today Show,” asked her mother, a retired elementary school teacher, to share the most significant parenting mistake she had seen throughout her career, and it’s disappointing to hear. “They didn’t enjoy them,” she said. “Kids are fun. You’ve got to enjoy them. They wanted them to be something that — most of us aren’t exactly what other people want us to be — so enjoy the kid you have.”

“I enjoyed you,” the retired teacher said while looking at her daughter.

@elenanico22

Lisa says it like it is #momlife #momsoftiktok #momwisdom #momtok #momhumor #parenting #parentingwisdom

What’s one of the biggest mistakes parents make today?

The teacher’s advice reminds parents everywhere to see their children for who they are, not who they want them to be. Because there’s nothing worse in this world than being a square peg that our parents are trying to squeeze into a round hole. You may want your child to excel in sports, but maybe they are happiest and most successful in theater. You may push your child to be in beauty pageants when they want to play music. You may want your child to be stoic when they are really sensitive and artistic.

The teacher’s advice suggests that parents should help their children become their best rather than shaping them into something that conflicts with their inner nature.

parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, teachers, retired teachers, A father and son talking together.via Canva/Photos

What is the problem with strict parenting?

The retired teacher shared what happens when parents push their children too far by using the example of a famous person at the school where she taught. “There was one very famous parent who, unfortunately, is sort of still involved now in politics,” the teacher said. “But he was a doctor then, and he was very strict about what his kids could eat. Like, super strict. So, of course, what did the kids want? Everything they couldn't have.”

There’s a reason why kids who have overly strict parents often rebel against how they were raised, whether it’s in a repressive household where they aren’t allowed to watch cartoons or a health-obsessed home where they couldn’t enjoy the occasional cookie. It’s a psychological phenomenon called “reactence.” When people feel their freedom is being threatened, they will become motivated to do the opposite of what they feel pressured to do. This can also be a problem when children are pushed to be something they are not.

parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, teachers, retired teachers, A mom and daughter.via Canva/Photos

“I call it the picture frame parent. As long as the kid looks like the perfect kid in a frame on their desk and the kid doesn’t mess up big enough to break that image, it’s all good,” one commenter wrote. “Toddler teacher. Same. So heartbreaking. I saw it a lot when I worked with highly educated parents with high incomes,” another added.

Some chimed in with sympathy for parents who are working hard and can't give their children the attention they deserve. "Parents are stressed, and they don’t realize how quickly childhood goes by," a commenter wrote. "We do enjoy our kids, but most of us have no village. It’s exhausting," another wrote.

A great carpenter cuts with the grain just as a seasoned sailor adjusts to the wind and a master chef seasons according to taste, not just the recipe. According to this retired teacher, a good parent sees their child for who they are and tries to develop them into the best version of themselves, rather than pushing them to be someone they are not.

This article originally appeared earlier this year. It has been updated.

4th grader wows 'Wicked' star with rendition of 'Defying Gravity'

Even if you've never seen the movie Wicked, you've heard Cynthia Erivo's rendition of the hit song, "Defying Gravity." When the first part of Wicked hit theaters in November 2024, the song quickly became the song of the season. Fans were blown away by Erivo's performance as Elphaba and her knockout vocals. Now, as the Wicked stars and fanbase celebrate the forthcoming release of part two, Wicked: For Good, one pint-sized fan decided to perform the song for her school talent show.

Ava Dargin, a fourth grader from Detroit, Michigan, went viral after her mom uploaded a video of the little girl singing "Defying Gravity" at her school talent show. It would seem Ava was channeling Cynthia Erivo, because such a big voice came from such a tiny body. To no one's surprise, the little girl won first place. Social media viewers were in awe of the little singer's talent, and so were various news outlets. It was The Today Show, thoughthat made Ava's dream come true. She got to meet the Wicked star in person before Erivo performed new music for the show's summer concert series.

@ravinlemar_

And Another One !!!!!! I’m so proud of my babygirl 💕🎶⭐️. #fyp #cynthiaerivo #daas #singing #explorepage #defyinggravity #viralvideo #talentshow

It was clear that Ava was a little starstruck, as evidenced by her not really knowing what to say to the singer even when prompted with appropriate questions she could ask. She quietly smiled up at Erivo, but all the shyness went out the window when Carson Daly suggests she sing a little bit from the song. This suggestion prompted Erivo to go a bit into protective mode by saying the request was putting the young girl on the spot. But it seems that singing is where Ava feels most comfortable because it didn't take any further prompting for her to belt out a line from the song.

Such a powerful voice coming out of a child so small had everyone watching in awe, including Erivo who admits, "I've got goosebumps!" Imagine being the little girl who sings a song so well that you gave the actual singer of the song goosebumps. That had to be a surreal experience for Ava whose classmates wouldn't believe if it hadn't been recorded in front of a national audience.

People are blown away by the little girl's big voice, leaving comments of praise and admiration for the family to read. One said, "Girl. whew. I'm crying! she did so good! Bravo baby! you keep defying gravity!"

Another can't get over Ava's breath control, writing, "The control she has over her oxygen, and vocals is crazy at her age!!!!"

"Girl she has me BAWLING like I’m watching Cynthia Erivo herself… she’s FABULOUS!!!" someone says.

"Just saw her on someone’s page. She is absolutely talented!! Her voice is so amazing and strong! I just know u cried! lol she’s a star. I hope Cynthia sees this," another person chimes in.

"The stage presence isn't being talked about enough bc aside from that beautiful talent she is very composed and uses her facial expressions perfectly. She needs to be on a stage or set," one person admires.

"She is clearly such a sweet girl! I've never been more proud of a complete stranger. you go girl! following and cheering you on from Toledo OH sis," someone else says.

Family

NICU nurse adopts teen mom after she delivered triplets alone

It was an understanding that only teen moms could share.

NICU nurse shares why she opened her home to teen with triplets.

Having your first baby is a scary experience. Everything is new—you've quite literally never done this before—not to mention an entire human is going to be removed from your body one way or another. Childbirth, no matter how your baby leaves your body, is not for the weak. But imagine giving birth alone to not just one baby, but three, all at the same time. Then imagine doing that feat at the age of 14.

Shariya Small experienced that scenario in a hospital in Indiana, and her nurse Katrina Mullen took note. Small's babies were premature, born at just 26 weeks, when the average gestation for triplets is 33 weeks, according to ReproductiveFacts.org. Due to their early birth, the babies, Serenitee, Samari, and Sarayah, had to stay in the NICU at Community Hospital North in Indianapolis for more than five months, according to Today.com.

During their time in the NICU, Mullen noticed the young mom visited her babies alone, not appearing to have much of a support system. “She’d be there alone for days at a time sitting at her babies’ bedside,” Mullen told Today.com.

The pair got to know each other over the months that the babies were in the hospital, but Small continued to be reluctant to open up about her family life. That changed after she found out that Mullen had her first child at 16 and had given it up for adoption. Their experiences bonded the two moms, and Mullen began helping to care for the babies and Small by giving her advice and showing her how to care for the infants properly.

Eventually, Mullen gave Small her phone number before the babies were discharged from the hospital. It quickly became apparent that Small did not have a support system, as she called Mullen often asking for advice. Out of concern, the nurse went to visit Small an hour away, where she was living with a family member.

The condition of the home was concerning enough, but Mullen became even more worried when she saw how thin Small's son Samari was. It turns out he had to be admitted to the hospital, which prompted a visit from Child Protective Services, who determined that Small and her three infants would need to enter foster care. She gave the social worker Mullen's information and things began to fall into place.

Listen to Small and Mullen explain their unique story below:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com


The triplets in April 2023.


shariya small, triplets, adopted children, kids eating burgers, today show, gofundme Shariya and the triplets.via Katrina Mullen/GoFundMe


Shariya and the triplets in 2024.


shariya small, triplets, adopted children, today show, gofundme Shariya and the triplets.via Katrina Mullen/GoFundMe

Since this story was published in 2023, things have gone well for the family of nine. After the story gained national media attention, a GoFundMe was started to help the family and raised over $140,000. Shariya is now 18 and completed her first year of college, Katrina was able to buy a house, and her boys' high school football team won the state championship. "We are so blessed," Katrina wrote on the GoFundMe page. "Thank you all for your kind words supporting our family. Every day is an adventure."

This article originally appeared two years ago and has been updated.

via Pexels

A woman sitting cross-legged on a yoga mat

Everyone wants to know how long they will live and there are many indicators that can show whether someone is thriving or on the decline. But people have yet to develop a magic formula to determine exactly how long someone should expect to live.

However, a doctor recently featured on the "Today" show says a straightforward test can reveal the likelihood that someone aged 51 to 80 will die in the near future. NBC News medical contributor Dr. Natalie Azar was on the "Today" show on March 8 and demonstrated how to perform the simple “sit to stand test” (aka sit-rising test or SRT) that can help determine the longevity of someone between 51 to 80.

The test is pretty simple. Go from standing to sitting cross-legged, and then go back to standing without using any parts of your body besides your legs and core to help you get up and down. The test measures multiple longevity factors, including heart health, balance, agility, core and leg strength and flexibility.

You begin the test with a score of 10 and subtract points on your way up and down for doing the following:

Hand used for support: -1 point

Knee used for support: -1 point

Forearm used for support: -1 point

One hand on knee or thigh: -1 point

Side of leg used for support: -1 point

A 2012 study published by the European Society of Cardiology found a correlation between the SRT score and how long people live. The study was conducted on 2002 people, 68% of whom were men, who performed the SRT test and were followed by researchers in the coming years. The study found that “Musculoskeletal fitness, as assessed by SRT, was a significant predictor of mortality in 51–80-year-old subjects.”

Those who scored in the lowest range, 0 to 3, had up to a 6 times greater chance of dying than those in the highest scores (8 to 10). About 40% of those in the 0 to 3 range died within 11 years of the study.

Azar distilled the study on "Today," saying: "The study found that the lower the score, you were seven times more likely to die in the next six years.”

"Eight points or higher is what you want," Azar said. "As we get older, we spend time talking cardiovascular health and aerobic fitness, but balance, flexibility and agility are also really important," she stressed.

One should note that the people who scored lowest on the test were the oldest, giving them an elevated risk of death.

Dr. Greg Hartley, Board Certified Geriatric Clinical Specialist and associate professor at the University of Miami, told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution that we should take the study with a grain of salt. “Frailty, strength, muscle mass, physical performance—those things are all correlated to mortality, but I would caution everybody that correlation doesn’t mean causation,” he said.

And of course, the test doesn't take into account injuries or disabilities that may make doing the test impossible. But one of the study's authors says that the study is a call to take our mobility seriously.

“The more active we are the better we can accommodate stressors, the more likely we are to handle something bad that happens down the road,” Dr. Claudio Gil Araujo, told USA Today.


This article originally appeared two years ago.