upworthy

newborn

Humor

Dad shares an 'Amazon product review' of his newborn baby and it's parody perfection

"4.5 stars. Accidentally got the gassy mode."

Courtesy of @CamOnAll/TikTok

Jordan's "product review" of his baby on TikTok has people rolling.

Amazon product reviews have become a staple for many content creators as they piece together ways to make money with their social media channels. Product in hand, they talk to the camera, addressing other Amazon shoppers to inform them of their experiences with something they got from the website.

There's a bit of a formula with those reviews that might not be super noticeable until you see one done in jest, and one dad with a newborn has totally nailed it.

amazon, amazon order, amazon review, shopping, package An Amazon package.Canva Photos

Jordan (@CamOnAll on TikTok) holds his newborn (Louise—they call her Lou) in a semi-football hold as he delivers an "Amazon product review" of her.

"Hey everybody, this is my product review. We got this from Amazon roughly five-and-a-half weeks ago or so. It came in a little different package than we were expecting. We had to do some manual opening of the box, but hey, we got it out of there." (Lou arrived via an unexpected but non-emergency c-section.)

"They don't tell you exactly the size," he continued. "This one was 21 inches, I believe, so it was a good length. It was six lbs 14 oz, which is a really healthy weight. The thing they didn't tell us after we first got this one was that they may lose a little bit of that delivery weight before you go home in terms of how much they ship to you. That's okay."

@camonall

4.5 stars. Accidentally got the extra gassy mode. 5/5 for looks though.#amazonfinds #productreview

Jordan goes on to explain that he does have a few complaints. He gives this model 4.5 stars, but not because there's anything wrong with its features. "The big thing about this one is this one came with the gassy mode activated. We weren't sure if it was going to be activated or not, but this one most definitely was." It also came with a lip tie and a tongue tie, which they didn't order, but he does give it "5 stars for looks."

In all seriousness, you really never know exactly what you're going to get when you have a baby delivered (or when you deliver one yourself). And whether you hit snags with shipping or find yourself questioning whether something went awry in the manufacturing process, humor is often the best way to handle the unexpected.

family, new parents, baby, parenting, happy family, humor Parents with baby.

Some people played right along with the joke, while other parents chimed in with their own experiences.

"i see you got the model without blinker fluid. can you get them with the blinker fluid already installed."

"Man..10 years ago I got 2 boxes at one time. I thought it was a joke. I guess they had a buy one get one free thing going on. They sent me another 8 months ago. It keeps scratching me and pulling my hair. Now they have another one coming in December😭 should I be scared?? I can’t return to sender LOL"

"👀 careful with the order button, I got 2 for 1 deal!"

babies, twins, parenting, humor, kids baby fight GIF Giphy

"I ordered 2 about 2 years apart. Unexpected opening of the packages as well. Both of mine had gassy mode activated. Make sure to check your owner's manual for both and make sure you don't accidentally activate the colicky mode."

"I hear the shipping is like 9 months. 😳 Can’t get them with Prime!"

"I've been trying to order a third one for 8 years. Freaking amazon."

"28 years ago, I ordered 1 base model and they shipped 2. Now with that I was not charged extra shipping and did not have to order again. My packages arrived 2 months early so I didn’t have to wait the full delivery time."

"Yea I bought 2 of them..but heads up..alot of them start to glitch at about 12 years old..I have to threaten mine that I still have the receipts and the original packaging"

Yep, a sense of humor is definitely necessary when raising kids.

You can follow Jordan on TikTok.

This article originally appeared in June.

From Your Site Articles
humor
HumorJoy
Motherhood

Moms explain the rarely discussed dissociative post birth phenomenon called 'the labor pause'

"When you just had a baby but you're too busy dissociating to enjoy the moment."

Photo credit: Canva

The dissociation that can happen post-birth may have a name

Bringing a baby into the world is an experience you just don't understand until you've done it yourself. There are no current words available that could accurately describe the emotional, physical and mental state of growing and birthing a child. Many people have tried to explain to new expectant moms what the process is like but words often fall short.

This failure of accurate descriptive words isn't the only reason explaining the child birthing process feels impossible. Every person's experience with birth is completely different than the next persons. There are similarities, of course, and those are the things we hang onto as "normal" but everything isn't always discussed. "The labor pause" is a common phenomenon that is rarely talked about and difficult to explain.

When a new mom posted a video of her directly after giving birth appearing dazed, writing in text overlay, "when you just had a baby but you're too busy dissociating to enjoy the moment," a prenatal educator steps in to explain. The educator runs MamaShakti Prenatal and she shares that the phenomenon the mother is experiencing is called "the labor pause."


"Immediately following the birth some women have described feeling shocked and a little disconnected from reality, whilst others have described feeling wide awake, alert and euphoric," the Practice Issue says.

While there doesn't appear to be an official name for the moments of dissociation some mothers feel right after birth, the prenatal educator calls the post-birth condition, the labor pause. Parents flock to the comments to attempt to explain what this labor pause feels like and why it happens. Some of the answers are amusing and some make this moment after birth make so much sense.

"Your brain is resetting, it's deleting how bad delivery hurt so you will do it again," someone jokes. Another mom emphatically agrees with this hypothesis, writing, "I remember the whole time thinking… there’s no way I’m doing this again, this is literal torture and then somehow a few months post partum I remember it hurting but can’t exactly “remember” if that makes sense… oh.. and want to do it again."

episode 17 friends GIFGiphy

One mom explains, "Its crazy because you go from the most excruciating and terrifying experience (mostly for your first) to basically feeling fine, 10 pounds lighter, and then suddenly theres another human in the room. To feel that much pain for so long and then BAM everything is fine. It is super weird."

"In this mind state while she is mentally adjusting and trying to make sense of the ordeal and yes, trauma, if anyone were to try to take that baby right then, she would probably freak out and become a literal mama bear. She would mentally regress to "protect at any cost" because in this moment, she's just going by instinct, like an animal. Not saying this in any derogatory way, just stating a fact, she's not mentally aware of anything, her brain is reconciling and so it's, in this moment, reverting to a humans base instincts. Id, ego and i can't remember the last one," another woman analyzes the new mom in the video.

New Baby Nbc GIF by This Is UsGiphy

A doctor in the comments explains, "It’s common. Form of shock. Best thing to do is ask the patient to recognize objects in the room, such as do you see that cup next to the sink or notice the color of the wall, or see the socket. Do not ask what she wants or draw attention to the child. Motherhood will kick her right in the a** and they will be inseparable."

"I repeatedly screamed "HOW DID THAT HAPPEN!!!!" For what felt like a minimum of 30 seconds immediately after my child was born. My THIRD child. It wasn't even my first rodeo, I knew full well how that happened. Crazy hormonal/ psychological experience to push a baby out," another laughs.

excited season 2 GIF by ShamelessGiphy

"I had no idea this was a common thing. Right after I pushed my son out I couldn’t look yet, I needed to breathe and then I felt bad for not crying and being overly emotional. I thought I didn’t have a connection or something. That’s the furthest thing from the truth. This boy never ever leaves my side and he is part of my soul," one mom shares.

The labor pause doesn't happen to everyone but it's a very common experience, even if the birth is via cesarean section. There seems to be something about the quick transition from one body to two separate humans that does something to your brain. Maybe your brain is deleting the painful experience or maybe it's digesting everything that took place. Either way, feeling like you're not really there for a few minutes after giving birth is completely normal and has no impact how much you love your new little one.

From Your Site Articles
child birth
MotherhoodFamily
Family

A new father shares why creating an email address for his baby boy is the perfect gift

His first email may end up being the best one he ever gets.

Canva.com

An X post by a new father has been making other new parents take note online. It’s regarding a gift and investment he wishes to give his newborn son for when he gets older. It’s not a savings bond. It’s not a car. It’s not even an heirloom. It’s an email address.

@Mellumjr on X shared that he created a new email address for his son. He intends on sending every photo and achievement his child has made to that email address then giving his son the password to that email address when he gets older. This way, the child can have a time capsule full of memories and thoughts from his father during that time to look through and read.



Comments overflowed all over social media, praising this idea.

“So cool! I wish I knew that before.”

“This is the silver lining!..he will always have that!....what a beautiful resource for your son 🥰💕”

“I don’t have kids, but I think this is a fantastic idea!”

Others had already taken the initiative.

“I actually did that for my daughter years before I got pregnant,” replied @Timberowl. “I would write to her about how I couldn’t wait to meet her some day. I sent pics of her ultrasounds and how excited I was. I emailed her while I was in labor, expressing my fear and excitement.”

“I started this in 2016, and have about 300 emails sent to my daughter. Just don’t know when to give her the pw and email. Maybe when she gets married one day,” @juju_f_baby12 commented.

“Exactly what I did for all my 3 kids,” said @heyfarrukh. “My eldest turned 12 two days ago and got the password. All three are also a part of a family photo album shared on Google Photos highlighting their achievements and memorable moments.”

Ever since the invention of the photograph, parents have been taking pictures of their children for prosperity purposes and memories to carry with them and to pass on to future generations. Even before then there were painted portraits for the same reason. While it is special to have a a physical family photo album or scrapbook for your child, the sad reality is that there is a chance it could be lost, misplaced, or destroyed in an accident.

In the digital age, it’s common for parents to save pictures in the cloud and set up hard drives as well to make sure that those images of their kids can be safely retained. One can argue that the best method is to have pictures saved in the cloud, on a hard drive, and with physical copies to cover all bases. Even critical commenters pointed out to @Mellumjr that the email address could automatically be erased if it wasn't regularly active.

But it’s not just photos that make this a wonderful gift to a child. With an email in their name, with those pictures could come messages from the past from a new parent. Videos of moments with time stamps and comments made from the parent to their future adult child. An archive of not just pictures memories that could be revisited on other platforms, but also one-on-one, just-for-them correspondence. A modern, more convenient version of parents writing letters to their future kids.

Who knows, it could turn into their day-to-day email address in which they could revisit their past whenever they want, and recall how much they were loved. There’s no one way to save a memory. Just make sure you have enough storage space, on the bookshelf or in your data plan.

From Your Site Articles
parenthood
FamilyParenting
Family

'Sleep training' is a heated debate in the parenting world. It shouldn't be.

Any parent who takes a definitive stance on sleep training needs to understand a few things.

Photo by RDNE Stock project/Pexels

Parents debate whether it's wrong to sleep train babies.

Welcoming a new baby to the world is a wonderful but daunting experience, and no matter how much you try to prepare, there will always be something you aren't fully prepared for.

For many parents, that thing is lack of sleep.

You can hear parents talk about exhaustion and sleep deprivation and still be wholly unprepared for what a baby who isn't a great sleeper does to to your psyche. It's no surprise that many parents turn to parenting books and "experts" to try to figure out how to get their babies to sleep, which is where the idea of "sleep training" comes in.

Sleep training is a broad term for teaching or training a baby to go to sleep (or back to sleep) without needing to be soothed by a parent or other caregiver. There are many sleep training methods that range from fairly common sense to borderline abuse, which is one reason it seems to spark big debates between parents. Everyone's talking about a different method when they defend or vilify sleep training.

Sleep training usually involves letting a baby fuss or cry for some length of time, which some see as problematic because of research on the importance of responding to babies' cries. Others say that a little crying is a small price to pay because it's healthier in the long run for baby and parents to get good sleep.

Of course, there's a huge difference between "crying or fussing for a few minutes" and "wailing and screaming with no end in sight," and that's where the big disconnect comes in. For some parents, sleep training entails the former, and it works, so they swear by it. For others, it entails the latter, and it's a nightmare, so they think it's horrible.

There's also a huge difference between "I'd love it if my baby would sleep all night without waking" and "I think I might die if I don't get a 4-hour stretch of uninterrupted sleep." Desperation makes many parents who might not love the idea of sleep training to give it a go.

I have some personal experience with this. My first baby wasn't a great sleeper. I remember thinking, at six weeks postpartum, "There's no way a person can survive on this little sleep." I adored my baby, but the sleep deprivation from waking up several times a night for weeks on end felt like literal torture.

She started sleeping through the night when she was a few months old, but that didn't last long. Teething happened. Then crawling happened. It seemed like just when she'd get into a nice sleep routine, some milestone would throw us right back to waking up and crying multiple times a night. She slept in our room next to our bed, so it was easy enough to nurse her back to sleep, but it was still night after night of disrupted sleep.

I was desperate to try something, but I wasn't keen on the idea of sleep training. It's a natural instinct to respond to your baby's cries, so walking away didn't feel right. One book had suggested leaving the baby in their crib to cry by themselves and not pick them up no matter what. If they got so upset that they threw up, you were just to clean them up and do the same thing again. Um, no thank you.

But I had heard other parents say they tried different sleep training methods that involved leaving them to cry for just a few minutes, going in to pat/comfort them, leaving them again for a little longer, and going back and forth until they eventually fall asleep. I read so many parents say something like, "It took like 15 minutes of fussing for them to fall asleep the first night, 5 minutes the second and after that they just went right to sleep and didn't wake up until morning!"

baby sleeping If only all babies slept this peacefully.Photo by Yan Krukau/Pexels

That sounded reasonable. So I tried it, a couple of times.

It went nothing like how those parents described. Not even close.

First of all, my baby did not "fuss." It was full-on crying, wailing and screaming with snot and drool involved. Secondly, there was no patting her to calm her down—she would only calm down if I picked her up. Third, the wailing when I left the room didn't ever subside, it only got worse and worse. I felt like I was torturing my baby and it was breaking my mama heart, so we gave it up.

I have no doubt that those parents were telling the truth about how sleep training worked with their child. It just absolutely did not work that way with mine.

That baby is now 24 and has slept in her own bed all night for over two decades. My other two kids had their own sleep personalities as babies—one of them super easy and the other more like my first. I didn't do anything different to make them that way—it's just how they were. It was hard sometimes. We co-slept as needed. It all worked out in the end.

There are a few things I know for sure after parenting three kids and talking with countless other parents:

1) Every baby, child and family is different and what works for one won't necessarily work for another. As long as no one is actually being abused or neglected, do what works for your kid and your family.

2) Anyone who offers definitive, one-size-fits-all advice on any part of parenting is flat-out wrong. One size most definitely does not fit all.

3) Sleep is important, but unless you've slept a night in their bed, don't judge a parent for how they choose to handle sleep with their baby. What's right for you may not be right for them.

From Your Site Articles
parenting
FamilyParenting
Trending Stories