People are loving this hilarious viral post about a dad bottle-feeding his baby in public.

Despite being the primary method of feeding babies for-literally-ever, breastfeeding in public is still a hot topic of debate.

As someone who's written about parenting for more than a decade, I can attest that few topics prompt a greater outpouring of opinion than breastfeeding in public. The first blog post I ever had go viral was a response to breastfeeding in public criticisms. My most-shared article for Upworthy was about public breastfeeding finally being legally protected in all 50 states. And this video I made for a commenter on that post who said she didn't want to see women breastfeeding in public has been shared thousands of times across various platforms:

Never feel uncomfortable watching a woman breastfeed again!

A commenter expressed her frustration at having to watch women breastfeed in public. Luckily, we have a built-in ability that makes it so that we never EVER have to be subjected to such things.


Posted by Annie Reneau, Writer on Friday, August 24, 2018

People feel very strongly about babies being breastfed in public and they aren't afraid to say so. Perhaps that's why this dad's Facebook post about bottle feeding his baby in public has so resonated with people that it's been shared 25,000+ times.

The story this dad tells about being harassed for his "exposed biceps" is hilariously familiar to breastfeeders.

Blogger Simon Harris shared a photo of him feeding his baby a bottle on his "Man Behaving Dadly" Facebook page with an accompanying description of what happened when he dared to do it in public.

I’m absolutely furious! James wanted his bottle today while we were in a coffee shop, and as soon as I started feeding...

Posted by Man Behaving Dadly on Friday, March 22, 2019

I’m absolutely furious!,” Harris wrote. “James wanted his bottle today while we were in a coffee shop, and as soon as I started feeding him a lady came over and told me that my exposed biceps were putting her off her food and that I should put a sweatshirt on.

*Snort* Okay, we can see where this is going, right?

Because I was holding the bottle at a certain angle apparently it was making my right bicep look too pumped and she said she would complain to the manager. It’s not my fault - when you are bottle feeding your arms get engorged because of all the lifting and holding, as well as the scooping and sterilising.

I told her to leave me alone as I was just providing nourishment for my baby. However, just a few minutes after that, another lady came over, winked at me and told me that she ‘wanted a go’ as well before walking back to her husband who told me not to pay any attention to her as she always makes harmless comments like this and nobody complained in the old days.

Before I knew what was going on, a manager came over and asked if I would like to give him the rest of his bottle in the little room where they keep the dishwasher supplies as it would be ‘more comfortable’ for me. How the hell would squatting on a crate of Finish tablets be ‘more comfortable?’”

Yep. The alleged disgust, the inappropriate comments, and the invitation to feed the baby in an uncomfortable place—it’s all par for the course for parents who breastfeed.

What's funny about Harris's post is that it's so recognizable and predictable. Cue the “Taking a crap is natural, but we don’t do that in public!” commenters, the “Breasts are sex organs!” folks, and the “What about the children?!” pearl-clutchers who love comparing the feeding of babies with having sex or defecating in public. It happens every time this subject comes up.

I've spent many hours explaining to people why those responses are basically bunk. For those who feel tempted to make those kind of arguments, please watch this brief video before you start typing:

Breastfeeding in Public vs. Peeing and Pooping in Public

New video! BREASTFEEDING IN PUBLIC VS. PEEING AND POOPING IN PUBLICI can't even count how many comments I've seen making this comparison. Here's why it's bunk.

Posted by Annie Reneau, Writer on Sunday, September 2, 2018

For those who say it's just so easy to find someplace private to feed a baby, consider which is easier: For mom with a hungry baby to gather up all of her stuff, including perhaps her other small children whom she may have with her, to go find a place that every human in the vicinity considers a discreet enough place for her to breastfeed? Or for a person who doesn't want to see a baby breastfeeding to simply move their eyeballs half an inch in their sockets so they don't have to watch?

Harris concluded his post: "Anyway I bet 97% of you won’t share this, mainly because it’s a load of bollocks and people are only monumental arseholes about boobs for some reason."

Seriously.

Harris's satire is on point, but the satirical comments on the post further drive it home.

If you've ever read an online debate about breastfeeding in public, you'll recognize the hilarity in these comments on Harris's post:

"Well why didn't you just feed him before you went out because thats how it works right?" wrote one woman. "I think you just did it to show off your guns and seek attention. Your biceps should be for your wife's eyes only. Have some respect for yourself!"

"How would I explain this to my children for goodness sakes?" wrote another commenter. "They’ve never even seen their father's biceps, well only in rare instances while he’s doing manly yard work outside in the heat (although he still is quite discreet). I think it should be MY choice if I should be forced to explain to my children what biceps were made by God to do. Shame on you. This is why you should cover up that arm and that baby. Think of everyone else."

Oh, man. This is all too familiar. As is this:

"Why did you have to put this on Facebook? You're just begging for attention? Back in my day people bottle fed their babies discretely. I'm sick of it being pushed in my face."

And this: "Feeding the baby is perfectly natural but so is pooping and you don’t see people doing that in public do you 😠 why don’t you have some self respect and cover up with a towel people shouldn’t have to be exposed to your biceps when they are TrYiNg tO EaT."

Bottom line: Babies gotta eat. And whether they're being fed from a breast or a bottle, you don't have to watch. Our eyeballs move for a reason. It really is as simple as that.

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Photo by Gregory Hayes on Unsplash

"Can I buy you a drink?" is a loaded question.

It could be an innocent request from someone who's interested in having a cordial conversation. Other time, saying "yes" means you may have to fend off someone who feels entitled to spend the rest of the night with you.

In the worst-case scenario, someone is trying to take advantage of you or has a roofie in their pocket.

Feminist blogger Jennifer Dziura found a fool-proof way to stay safe while understanding someone's intentions: ask for a non-alcoholic beverage or food. If they're sincerely interested in spending some time getting to know you, they won't mind buying something booze-free.

RELATED: States are starting to require mental health classes for all students. It's about dang time.

But if it's their intention to lower your defenses, they'll throw a mild tantrum after you refuse the booze. Her thoughts on the "Can I buy you a drink?" conundrum made their way to Tumblr.

via AshleysCo / Tumblr


via AshleysCo / Tumblr

The posts caught the attention of a bartender who knows there are lot of men out there whose sole intention is to get somone drunk to take advantage.

"Most of the time, when someone you don't know is buying you a drink, they're NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality," the bartender wrote. "They're buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down."

So they shared a few tips on how to be safe and social when someone asks to buy you a drink.

From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, "serve her a stronger drink, I'm trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?" usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I'm a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl's more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her.
But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don't know is buying you a drink, they're NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they're buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down.

Tips for getting drinks-

1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you're none the wiser.

2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn't give two shits that you're not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don't want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you'd like something light, and that's a big clue to us that you're uncomfortable with whomever you're standing next to. Again, we see this all the time.

3. If you're in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol:
Here's a list of light liquors, and mixers that won't get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail:

X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state.
Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%.
Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%.
Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21%
Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%.
Hope this helps someone out!

RELATED: Permit denied for 'straight pride' parade in California

If you do accept a drink from someone at a bar and you want to talk, there's no need to feel obligated to spend the rest of the night with them.

Jaqueline Whitmore, founder of The Protocol School of Palm Beach, says to be polite you only have to "Engage in some friendly chit-chat, but you are not obligated to do more than that."

If someone asks to buy you a drink and you don't want it, Whitmore has a great tip. "Say thank you, but you are trying to cut back, have to drive or you don't accept drinks from strangers," Whitmore says.

What if they've already sent the drink over? "Give the drink to the bartender and tell him or her to enjoy it," Whitmore says.

Have fun. Stay safe, and make sure to bring a great wing-man or wing-woman with you.

Well Being
Photo by Artem Beliaikin on Unsplash

Jasmine has been used as a natural treatment for depression, anxiety, and stress for thousands of years. Oil from the plant has also been used to treat insomnia and PMS, and is considered a natural aphrodisiac. It turns out, our ancestor's instincts to slather on the oil when they wanted a little R&R were correct.

A study, published in the Journal of Biological Chemistry, and according to Professor Hanns Hatt of the Ruhr University in Bochum, Germany, revealed that jasmine can calm you down when you're feeling anxious.The results can "be seen as evidence of a scientific basis for aromatherapy."

"Instead of a sleeping pill or a mood enhancer, a nose full of jasmine from Gardenia jasminoides could also help, according to researchers in Germany. They have discovered that the two fragrances Vertacetal-coeur (VC) and the chemical variation (PI24513) have the same molecular mechanism of action and are as strong as the commonly prescribed barbiturates or propofol," says the study.

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Nature


Rep. Peter King (R-NY) is a name you should remember. If you don't follow politics closely, remember his name because he's the first Republican in Congress to openly join the call for a renewed federal ban on assault weapons.

If you're a Democrat or a diehard progressive partisan, remember his name because it's proof that as a nation we can put principles before party and walk across the political aisle to get things done.

If you're a Republican, remember his name as evidence that real leadership in politics sometimes means risking your reputation to do what is right even when most of your colleagues disagree or lack the political courage to go first.

But let's allow Rep. King to explain himself in his own words:

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Democracy