Rape is a huge problem in South Africa.
According to the United Nations, South Africa has the highest rates of rapes in the world.
Photo by Zeno Petersen. All photos used with permission.
Despite the progress made post-apartheid, such as interracial marriage and same-sex marriage, dismantling toxic masculinity and destroying rape culture still has a long way to go.
That's why people started hanging undergarments in the streets of Johannesburg.
It's not only a direct call for change — it's also an example of South African values and progress.
Creators Jenny Nijenhuis and Nondumiso Msimanga stand with their exhibition. Photo by Zeno Petersen.
Using donated pairs of panties through the #SasDirtyLaundry hashtag, a Facebook page, and collection centers across Johannesburg, Jenny Nijenhuis and Nondumiso Msimanga created a 4,000-foot-long washing line installation that displayed 3,600 pairs of panties, the approximate number of rapes that occur on a daily basis.
Eloquently called “SA’s Dirty Laundry,” the exhibit has taken the city by storm.
“I had been feeling like we live in a world gone crazy, there is so much turmoil, hurt, disconnect and lack of self-love,” Nijenhuis writes in an email. “I felt powerless and unable to do anything about it. Then I realized that we can do something about it without reaffirming the status quo. I approached Nondumiso and asked her if she would work with me in saying something, as women, as human beings, as people who’ve been given a gift. So we started a journey together, we decided to be that change. To encourage other women [and] other people to join us and start a revolution without the need to revolt.”
Photo by Brett Skolmen.
To bring people together, the artists took an idea from Ram Dass’ "Be Here Now."
“We’re living in a country (world) which is drowning under the weight of systemic dysfunction,” writes Nijenhuis. “Duality or polarization is the world that most everyone is living in all of the time, in every moment. The only solution is to take the poles of every set of opposites and see the way in which they are one.”
Alumni of the University of the Witwatersrand and Rhodes University, respectively, Nijenhuis and Msimanga have found creativity to be critical in their lives. Both are survivors of sexual assault, and both wanted to air South Africa’s dirty laundry to create a connection with others without expecting anything in return.
“This book [Lewis Hyde’s "The Gift"] helped me to see that an artistic talent (or any talent for that matter) is not something that you own,” writes Nijenhuis. “It is given to you, you are a vessel for it and in being that vessel you put a gift out into the world with no expectation of return. If you truly do this, the gift is given life by the people who receive it and value is placed in life and the gift is passed on.”
Photo by Jenny Nijenhuis.
The number of daily assaults portrayed in the display — 3,600 — has been criticized. (According to the UN, 132 rapes occur per day in South Africa.) Nijenhuis points out, though, that rape statistics can be tricky. Every police organization uses data differently in South Africa.
And because rape survivors are often treated like they’re the ones at fault (a similar issue in the U.S.), rape victims are less likely to report a crime.
While they weren’t looking for anything in return, the artists’ installation certainly grabbed viewers' attention.
Many were shocked at the extent of rape culture in South Africa, and the dialogue has started to go viral on social media. While they aren’t sure what’s next for the exhibit, they are sure that they want the message behind the exhibit to continue spreading around the world.
“The problem in South Africa is that there’s a culture or belief that women and girls are owned and that sex is a man’s right,” writes Nijenhuis. “We hope that the exhibition therefore will educate and make people more aware of what their choices and beliefs are and how these choices affect the lives of women [and] others every day.”
12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women
We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.
Men and the feels.
Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.
In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.
Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?
IS IT?
Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.
Encourage.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Sharing ideas.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."
Email requests.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
Idea sharing.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.
Sexism.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.
Mansplain.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.
Mistakes.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.
Promotions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.
Rude.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.
Interruptions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.
Collaboration.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.
Disagreements.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!
In conclusion...
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.
About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.
The comedic book cover.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.
This article was originally published on March 25, 2019.