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Need to get the creative juices flowing? Try a dose of sarcasm.

See, mom? Being sarcastic is good for you!

Did you ever watch "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air"? I recently needed a nostalgia fix, so I re-watched the series. And I realized I had a new favorite character: the totally underrated Geoffrey Butler. Sure, he works for the Banks family, but he does not hesitate to talk back.

GIFs via "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air."

I think a big part of why he gets away with it is because, well, (a) he's hilarious, and (b) he uses sarcasm.

Sarcasm gets a bad rap. It isn't hard to find people who are all about disparaging my most beloved form of communication.

Oscar Wilde is known for saying that "sarcasm is the lowest form of wit." One of the most popular quotes about sarcasm on Goodreads is by author Cassandra Clare in her novel "City of Bones": "Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt."

Image by Joe1512517/Someecards.

Not so fast, Oscar!

Fellow sarcasm enthusiasts rejoice because it turns out that sarcasm can be good for you ... AND the people around you.

GIF via "Real Housewives of New York City."

YUP. A recent study published in the journal Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes found that sarcasm helps boost creativity.

In three separate experiments, they had people in two groups: The people who said something either sarcastic or sincere and the people who listened to them.

In every case, the people who said, heard, or thought of sarcasm performed better in creativity tests.

I bet Bob Ross was super sarcastic. GIF via "The Joy of Painting."

Apparently, the benefits of sarcasm come from the structure of the sass: The process of creating and interpreting sarcasm makes your brain do awesome things.

In the study, they found that sarcasm encourages abstract thinking, which in turn gets the creative juices flowing. In an interview with The Huffington Post, co-author of the study Li Huang, Ph.D., explained:

"Both constructing and decoding sarcasm requires overcoming the psychological distance between two opposite meanings -- what's said and what's intended. Traversing psychological distance often triggers abstract thinking, a cognitive process responsible for creative thinking. As a result, sarcasm can fuel creativity for both the expresser and recipient."

See? Sarcasm can be a really great brain exercise!

So the next time someone someone tells you to stop with the sarcasm, you can let them know it's not just for your benefit — it's also for theirs. Who can argue with that?

Sorry, mom. Looks like my sarcastic tendencies are here to stay.

And we wouldn't want that, would we? Image via Abbey1544269/Someecards.

Parenting

When a Patagonia employee breastfed her baby in a meeting her male VP's response was a masterclass in workplace values

Talk about a "family-friendly workplace."

Holly Morissette/LinkedIn

Years after it happened, Patagonia's approach to the "family-friendly workplace" is a whole new level that still deserves our attention - and praise.

The outdoor clothing and gear company has made a name for itself by putting its money where its mouth is. From creating backpacks out of 100% recycled materials to donating their $10 million tax cut to fight climate change to refusing to sell to clients who harm the environment, Patagonia leads by example.

That dedication to principle is clear in its policies for parents who work for them, as evidenced by a 2019 viral post from Holly Morisette, a recruiter at Patagonia.

Morisette wrote on LinkedIn:

"While nursing my baby during a morning meeting the other day after a recent return from maternity leave, our VP (Dean Carter) turned to me and said...'There is no way to measure the ROI on that. But I know it's huge.'

It got me thinking...with the immense gratitude that I have for on-site childcare at Patagonia comes a responsibility to share a 'call to action'. A PSA to tout the extraordinary benefits that come along with not asking employees to make the gut wrenching decision to either leave their jobs or leave their babies. TO HAVE TO LEAVE THEIR JOBS OR LEAVE THEIR BABIES. That perhaps just one person will brave the subject with their employer (big or small) in the hopes that it gets the wheels turning to think differently about how to truly support working families.

That with a bit of creativity, and a whole lot of guts, companies can create a workplace where mothers aren't hiding in broom closets pumping milk, but rather visiting their babies for large doses of love and serotonin before returning to their work and kicking ass.

It's no wonder that Patagonia has 100% retention of moms. Keeping them close to their babies keeps them engaged. And engaged mothers (and fathers!) get stuff done. Thank you, Patagonia, for leading the way. "


Holly Morissette on LinkedIn: "While nursing my baby during a morning meeting the other day after a recent return from maternity leave, our VP (Dean Carter) turned to me and said..."There is no way to measure the ROI on that. But I know it's huge." It got me thinking...with the immense gratitude that I have for on-site childcare at Patagonia comes a responsibility to share a “call to action". A PSA to tout the extraordinary benefits that come along with not asking employees to make the gut wrenching decision to either leave their jobs or leave their babies. TO HAVE TO LEAVE THEIR JOBS OR LEAVE THEIR BABIES. That perhaps just one person will brave the subject with their employer (big or small) in the hopes that it gets the wheels turning to think differently about how to truly support working families. That with a bit of creativity, and a whole lot of guts, companies can create a workplace where mothers aren't hiding in broom closets pumping milk, but rather visiting their babies for large doses of love and serotonin before returning to their work and kicking ass. It's no wonder that Patagonia has 100% retention of moms. Keeping them close to their babies keeps them engaged. And engaged mothers (and fathers!) get stuff done. Thank you, Patagonia, for leading the way. " www.linkedin.com


Just the first eight words of Morisette's post are extraordinary. "While nursing my baby during a morning meeting..."

As if that's totally normal. As if everyone understands that working moms can be much more engaged and efficient in their jobs if they can feed their baby while they go over sales figures. As if the long-held belief that life and work must be completely separate is a construct that deserves to be challenged.

And then the comment from her male colleague about the ROI (Return on Investment) of breastfeeding—witty, considering the time and place, and yet so supportive.

On-site childcare so that parents don't have to choose between leaving their jobs or leaving their babies. Letting life integrate with work so that working families don't have to constantly feel torn in two different directions. Flexibility in meetings and schedules. Allowing for the natural rhythms and needs of breastfeeders. Making childcare as easy and accessible as possible so that employees can be more effective in their jobs.

All of this seems so profoundly logical, it's a wonder that more companies have not figured this out sooner. Clearly, it works. I mean, who has ever heard of a 100% retention rate for mothers?

Patagonia's got it goin' on. Let's hope more companies take their lead.


This article originally appeared on 8.16.19

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The dull side of these 17 'dream jobs' will erase any doubts about your own work life

Every job has its disappointments. Maybe that's not such a bad thing.

Photo credit: Canva

Maybe there is no such thing as a dream job.

Listen, no job is perfect. Even with what most consider to be a dream gig, there’s bound to be some gap between expectations and reality—be it tedious, but necessary admin work, investments costs, day-to-day stresses, being away from family for extended periods of time…the list goes on.

And that was the topic of conversation led by a recent AskReddit thread, when someone asked:

“What type of job seems appealing but ends up being quite disappointing?”

Out of the 4.7 responses the question garnered, we’ve chosen XX of the most interesting ones.

While it might at first seem like a bit of a downer to pull back the curtain on some of these vocations, it can also instill a little more appreciation for the folks that manage to actually do them day in and day out.

Without further ado…

1. Librarian

via GIPHY

"I tell people it's my job and they say, 'That must be chill," or, 'I'd love to read all day.' It's basically just another customer service job where I'm either checking books in/out or showing people how to do basic computer things, but we also attract a lot of folks with mental health problems or substance abuse issues, and that can lead to some tense situations."

—u/fourphonejones

"I'm a fellow librarian here, and people are surprised when I tell them this. People idealize libraries as a kind of academic third space, but I always explain it by saying, 'It’s more a community center with a bunch of books than a place to read and do research.'

Like all jobs, it comes down to measuring stats to determine value, even though it's a service. How many computer users did we have? How many people attended our programs? Not so much discussing literature genres and theory. Also, here’s some Narcan, and watch this video on dementia and active shooter situations.

And let’s not get started on the book ban.”

—u/PonyEnglish

2. Florist

via GIPHY

"Working at a flower shop is just like any other retail position, but everyone assumes it’s more enjoyable than it really is. Assisting families in selecting flowers for funerals is definitely not the fun part either."

—u/Serious-Baseball-321

"'I don't care that you're saying you want azaleas, the email specifically said rhododendrons. Yes, I get it's your special day, Janice, but I can't source 34 brand-new centerpieces in the next two hours. Yeah, well, next time communicate with your bridesmaids better. Yes, I was insinuating there will be a next time, because you seem lovely.'"

—u/Worried_Place_917

3. Forensic Scientist

via GIPHY

"A friend of mine is a forensic scientist, and whenever he's on dating apps, it's the only thing people want to talk about. His work is actually pretty technical and involves a lot of routine tasks."

—u/Beneficial-Pop7235

"Former forensic scientist here, it sounds glamorous but often you specialize in one thing like drug analysis or fingerprint analysis and it becomes very repetitive. I was fortunate to be a generalist and did a variety of things."

—u/ironmanchris

4. Personal Trainer

via GIPHY


“Sounds fun, right? Help people exercise all day. Spend time in your already-happy-place - the gym. In reality it's a constant grind to keep getting new people in to replace the ones who drop out suddenly on a whim, or complain about not having enough time, etc etc. They never really put in the true work and focus and expect their hand to be held the whole time. People who can't learn to appreciate the process of losing weight and getting fit.”

—u/relevantelephant00

5. Veterinarian

via GIPHY

"Expectation: Ooo, lots of animals!

Reality: Death. SO MUCH DEATH."

—u/rekniht01

"There's a reason that field has some of the highest suicide rates. I only worked in a pet store, and the number of insane pet parents, abusive/ignorant owners, and pets that were definitely not living their best lives was heartbreaking. Vets get even more angry customers and heartbreaking cases. I befriended a few vet techs and vets, and their mental health is almost always in the dumps."

—u/magicrowantree

6. Security Guard

via GIPHY

"I couldn't believe how lucky I was...getting paid to stand there and do nothing.

Until that job, I had not realized how much I would hate being bored."

—u/series_hybrid

7. Travel Blogger

via GIPHY

"A travel blogger job seems appealing with its promise of adventure and free trips, but it often turns out disappointing due to constant deadlines, unstable income, and the pressure to always 'perform' for social media."

—u/Delilah_KlineXO

…In that same vein…

8. Influencer

via GIPHY

"I know a lot of kids aspire to it, but the idea of having to constantly be on camera and always coming up with new content and always looking and playing the part no matter what seems literally exhausting. Not to mention the fact that you’re an online figure, so you are going to experience abuse and crap from people because that’s what people do online. It’s a hard pass from me."

—u/wellyboot97

9. Rancher/Farmer

via GIPHY

"I cringe every time I see someone say they want to live on a farm or ranch. It's hard, brutal work. Most people that say it will not last."

—u/peezle69

"Every time somebody romanticizes farm life, I think of the time my entire family went on vacation in the middle of winter and left me to take care of the herd. Massive ice storm hit while they were gone. Picture me, a 5'4" woman, alone out in the middle of the prairie in my dad’s overalls and coat, trying to bust ice in the cattle troughs with an ax. Ballerina Farm could never."

—u/jellyrat24

10. Music Store Employee

via GIPHY

"I thought it was going to be listening to awesome music all day. It was just putting stickers on everything, trying to sell an absolute rip-off of a store card, and listening to the same four basic-ass albums over and over and over until you understand why war crimes are a thing."

—u/Comics4Cooks

11. Event Planner

via GIPHY


"Seems exciting until you’re stuck with last-minute changes, unresponsive vendors, and managing everyone’s stress."

—u/Exotic_Insect8587

"I studied event management and I couldn't believe how much red tape and risk management there is. It's like the whole job."

—u/ClammyPlacebo

12. Chef

via GIPHY

"I wanted to be a chef when I was a kid. Now I work in a kitchen and I hate it. The work is harder than you think, a lot of your time is spent doing mundane tasks, and you practically live there so no work-life balance.

Although all the chefs I know that 'made it' make quite a bit of money, they were so hard on their bodies from lack of sleep and drinking that they can’t enjoy their life after they retire. Their friends were reduced to their drinking buddies because they were the only ones who were available after closing.

Those who had families had strained relationships with their children and wives. Super sad."

—u/Dry-Substance3260

13. Film Crew

via GIPHY

"Don't get me wrong, I love it, but after five years I can already tell my body will not be able to keep up with it till retirement."

—u/Flanman1337

"The hours that people in this industry work are completely insane. I'm talking everything from set building to cameras to makeup to the damn accountants. Our hotels offered free breakfast and even light dinners, and we almost never saw them."

—u/lovebyletters

14. Video Game Developer

via GIPHY

"Video games are great. Creating them is hell with long work hours and minimum pay."

—u/The1joriss

15. College Professor

via GIPHY

"Much less lecturing on profound topics of importance, much more trying to keep your course running properly on Canvas than expected..."

—u/PuzzleheadedPin1817

16. Archeologist

via GIPHY

"When I was an undergrad, it was so exciting. A different dig every summer… different eras, different cultures, different countries, different crews, so much to learn! But I figured out in grad school pretty quickly that it was 90% begging for money for your project while having to juggle teaching first-year yokels at some school in a part of the country you never wanted to visit — let alone live — and 10% using a toothbrush on the same patch of dirt that no one was ever going to be interested in for the rest of your life."

—u/SnappyTippyTappies

17. Social Media Manager

via GIPHY

"Thought it’d be memes and chill, turns out it’s dealing with 2 a.m. crises over emojis."

—u/SunbeamHeart

"Even if I'm at home and on my social media privately, I can't not see what people are trying to sell, product or way of life, or what trend they are hopping on. It's handy since I can spot a scam but also a balls because I don't really enjoy social media like normal."

—u/isaidyothnkubttrgo

And as a positive bonus, we’ve added in a few jobs people said might seem UNappealing but are actually not half bad!

1. Data analyst

“Definitely not exciting to talk about and I live in spreadsheets but it's honestly a lot like doing puzzles, lots of problem solving.”

—u/DrunkenJetPilot

2. Financial analyst

"This is the best job I've ever had. I'm always looking for more projects, because I love that initial rush of looking at all the angles, and trying new things to figure out this particular issue. And then when you create something really cool that makes people's lives easier, amazing. A very satisfying job with lots of appreciation."

—u/WalmartGreder

3. Urban Forester

“I’m a forester who got into that line because I liked physical outdoor labor, but moved into the more technical side of urban forestry because I don’t want to be doing physical labor when I’m 50.

Don’t tell my forester friends this but I’ve fallen hard for spreadsheets. I just set up a 5 tab sheet that’s all interlinked and I feel like I just created a miniature universe. It’s fascinating.

And I have a MiFi so I can work spreadsheets outside under trees. Life is good!” —u/TheMonkus

Let's face it—humans need novelty, relaxation, creative expression, stimulation, opportunities to learn. No job can fulfill all these needs. Maybe we're better off accepting that as long as we're getting these needs met in other ways, then maybe we're not doing so bad after all.

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Woman's rare antique turned away from 'Antique Roadshow' for beautiful heart-wrenching reason

"I just love you for bringing it in and thank you so much for making me so sad."

Photos by Murat Rahim Caglak and Antoni Shkraba via Canva

Woman's antique turned away from 'Antique Roadshow'

People come by things in all sorts of ways. Sometimes you find something while at a garage sale and sometimes it's because a family member passed away and it was left to them. After coming into possession of the item, the owner may be tempted to see how much it's worth so it can be documented for insurance purposes or sold.

On a recent episode of BBC One's Antique Roadshow, a woman brought an ivory bracelet to be appraised. Interestingly enough, the expert didn't meet this rare find with excitement, but appeared somber. The antique expert, Ronnie Archer-Morgan carefully explains the purpose of the bracelet in what appears to be a tense emotional exchange.

There would be no appraisal of this antique ivory bracelet adorned with beautiful script around the circumference. Archer-Morgan gives a brief disclaimer that he and the Antique Roadshow disapprove of the trade of ivory, though that was not his reason for refusing the ivory bangle.

"This ivory bangle here is not about trading in ivory, it’s about trading in human life, and it’s probably one of the most difficult things that I’ve ever had to talk about. But talk about it we must," Archer-Morgan says.

Turns out the woman had no idea what she had in her possession as she purchased it from an estate sale over 30 years before. One of the elderly residents she cared for passed away and the woman found the ivory bracelet among the things being sold. Finding the bangle particularly intriguing with the fancy inscription around it, she decided to purchase the unique piece of jewelry.

After explaining that his great-grandmother was once enslaved in Nova Scotia, Canada before being returned to Sierra Leone, Archer-Morgan concluded he could not price the item.

"I just don’t want to value it. I do not want to put a price on something that signifies such an awful business. But the value is in the lessons that this can tell people," he tells the woman.

In the end the woman leaves without knowing the monetary value of the item but with a wealth of knowledge she didn't have before visiting. Now she can continue to share the significance of the antique with others. Watch the full explanation below.

This article originally appeared on 4.3.24

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Health

Here's why you're probably waking up right at 3 or 4 in the morning and how to make it stop

It happens to just about everyone.

via Polina Kovaleva/Pexels

A woman with her eye mask on in bed.

Do you often wake up at 3 or 4 a.m. with an intense feeling of anxiety? Do you get stressed that you’re awake and begin making a mental laundry list of everything you need to do the next day? Do you start thinking about fights you once had with your spouse or ponder how you have let yourself down in the past?

If so, you’re not alone. It’s common for people to wake up at 3 or 4 a.m. regularly and there’s a reason why we choose this time to catastrophize and worry. The good news is that there are some steps we can take to get through that awkward phase of the night so we can wake up refreshed.

Why do I wake up at 3 or 4 a.m. every night?

Many of us reliably wake up in the middle of the night because after we’ve had a good chunk of sleep, our bodies start to slowly prepare us for the day by reducing melatonin, the hormone that puts us to sleep and increasing levels of cortisol, the stress hormone.

That biological phase of sleep is why we start to feel stressed.

sleep, nightmares, cortisole A woman wakes up in the middle of the nightvia Oscar Calstrom/Pexels

After the big hormone release at 3 or 4 in the morning, if you are dealing with stress in your life, you are more likely to wake up. If your life is calmer and you don’t already have a stress baseline, you will probably wake up, fall asleep quickly and forget that it happened.

Why do I wake up feeling stressed in the middle of the night?

If you’re already experiencing stress in your life, that extra cortisol kick is going to cause you to wake up with a feeling of anxiety. The problem is that when we’re lying in bed in the middle of the night, we are in a vulnerable position. “Around this time in the sleep cycle, we’re at our lowest ebb physically and cognitively. From nature’s viewpoint, this is meant to be a time of physical and emotional recovery, so it’s understandable that our internal resources are low,” Greg Murray, a psychology researcher with expertise in mood, sleep, and the circadian system, writes in The Conversation.

“But we also lack other resources in the middle of the night – social connections, cultural assets, all the coping skills of an adult are unavailable at this time,” Murray continues. “With none of our human skills and capital, we are left alone in the dark with our thoughts. So the mind is partly right when it concludes the problems it’s generated are unsolvable – at 3 a.m., most problems literally would be.”


At this moment, when we’re stressed and feeling vulnerable, stuck in bed with no way out, we can begin to spiral. This is when we ruminate on why we forgot to feed the dog that one day in 1994 or contemplate why things went bad with your first significant other at 21. It’s when we start recalling a disagreement with a friend and plotting out what we’ll say the next time the issue arises.

At this point, if we don’t stop spiraling, we’ll be up until 5 a.m. and will feel like garbage when it’s time to go to work.

The good news is that there are ways to get back to sleep and stop the downward anxiety spiral.

Make a list

Dr. Jade Wu says that if you wake up and feel stressed about things you need to take care of, walk out of your room (so you don’t associate it with stressors) and make a list to read in the morning. This will free you of your worries, because you know you can care for them when you are awake.

Pay attention to your breath

Murray says you should redirect your attention from your thoughts to your breath, which is a form of meditation. “I bring my attention to my senses, specifically the sound of my breath. When I notice thoughts arising, I gently bring my attention back to the sound of breathing,” Murray writes in The Conversation. This works in 2 ways: first, it takes your attention away from your spiraling thoughts and second, the breathing exercise helps you relax.

Have a bite to eat

Sometimes, we wake up in the middle of the night because we’re hungry and our blood sugar is dropping. “The first question I ask [my patients] is, ‘When was the last time you ate?’” Michael Breus, Ph.D. psychologist specializing in sleep disorders, told Sleep.com. “Often, they’ve finished their last meal at 7 p.m.; now it’s 3 in the morning — that’s eight hours later — so guess what? They’re out of fuel.” If you’ve woken up because of a drop in blood sugar, experts recommend eating a small snack that includes protein and fat, like peanut butter.

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Lebanese dance troupe wins 'America's Got Talent' with one final incredible performance

The lionesses have proudly walked to victory.

Talent Recap/YouTube

The competition came down to the Mayyas and pole dancer Kristy Sellars.

The fan-favorite all-female dance troupe from Lebanon took home the ultimate prize on a September 2022 episode of “America’s Got Talent,” beating out some incredibly heavy competition this season. With the win came a $1 million cash prize as well as the opportunity to headline a show at Las Vegas' Luxor Hotel and Casino.

From first-round auditions to the riveting live finale, the Mayyas have consistently lived up to their name, which translates to “proud walk of the lioness,” with remarkable skill and fearlessness in each and every performance.

You can take a look at their entire “AGT” journey below, ending with that unforgettable finale. Prepare to be blown away.

The dance crew promised to “hypnotize” during its first-round audition, and did so with flying colors. Having previously won “Arab’s Got Talent” back in 2019, the Mayyas were well prepared to wow the crowd.

Their spellbinding performance granted the Mayyas a golden buzzer from judge Sofia Vergara, who called it the “most beautiful creative dancing” she had ever seen.

They once again left audiences with their jaws on the floor after their semifinal routine, which was even more bold and dramatic. Howie Mandel called it the “best moment in AGT history,” adding that the Mayyas should be “the poster people for female empowerment."

Simon Cowell also predicted that their performance would “change the world.”

Then came the live finale, where the proud lionesses left it all on the stage. The stunning performance had glowing orbs of light, glittery galaxies and a huge white gown made out of large feather fans. In a word, it had everything.

Yeah, it was hauntingly beautiful.

Viewers have been rooting for the Mayyas from the beginning—not only for their ability to create mesmerizing illusions using clever choreography and brilliant prop manipulation, but for their mission to “prove to the world what Arab women can do, the art we can create, the fights we fight.”

As explained by Nadim Cherfan, the team’s choreographer, “Lebanon is not considered a place where you can build a career out of dancing, so it’s really hard, and harder for women.”

This combined with the country’s worsening economic crisis and apparent political corruption made each advancement to the next round mean so much more than getting closer to a coveted title. As Cherfan told People, “It’s about a huge bigger message for our people to make them believe in themselves and to give hope to our country who is going into a dark time."

The Mayyas shared their well-deserved victory with their home country, posting a video to Instagram of the win along with the caption saying “Lebanon, this one’s for you.”

It’s lovely to see incredible talent. It’s even better to hear the incredible stories behind the talent. The Mayyas were dedicated to showing the world what Arab women can do, and they succeeded.


This article originally appeared on 9.16.22

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