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Moms share the best—and worst—gifts they've ever received for Mother's Day

May this serve as inspiration, or as a cautionary tale, for gift-givers this year.

mothers day gift guide, mothers day, mothers day gift ideas

Does mom really need more cleaning supplies? Probably not.

Mother’s Day is drawing near, and for many gift givers that means rolling out the box mix pancake breakfast in bed or making a clumsy, yet sentimental handmade trinket.

But how do moms actually feel about the presents they’ve received on their special day? Online parenting resource BabyCenter asked, and moms of all kinds answered.

Below are some gifts that brought moms to tears—both tears of joy, and of, well, the other kind. May this list act as a source of inspiration or a humorous cautionary tale for well-intentioned partners and kiddos trying to celebrate Mom.

Let’s start off with some of the worst gifts…


"A toilet-bowl brush set and cleaning supplies."

— Anonymous

"A set of pots."

— Mildred, Canada

"A vacuum cleaner and breakfast in bed way too early."

— Karen, California

"My husband decided to go out of state on Mother's Day weekend, and it wasn't just for business. I was seven months pregnant with our second child."

— Rose, Michigan

"An apron."

— Carolyn

"A screen door."

— Kristin, Wisconsin

In general, cooking, cleaning and basic household supplies are a big no-no, unless mom has shown a specific interest in receiving them as gifts. Sure, practical gifts are great, but there are already too many overworked moms whose identity in the family is far too enmeshed with their ability to take on the domestic labor. There’s so much more to Mom than that, and Mother’s Day is an opportunity to recognize that.

mothers day

This is the face of a mom who does not want to clean or cook on Mother's Day. Please and thank you.

Photo credit: Canva

Also, please don’t be this spouse:

"I asked my husband what we should do for my first Mother's Day. He looked a bit perplexed and said, 'Well, you're not my mother.'"

— Mollie, California

Or…

"My husband gave me the honor of keeping the flower that I bought for his mother!"

— Jennifer, North Carolina

Or…

"My husband gave me a card emblazoned with heart-shaped egg yolks on top of shattered shells that read, 'Thanks for donating your eggs.'"

— Mary, Maryland

Yikes And now, onto the best Mother’s Day gifts…

mothers day gift ideas

These gifts actually take mom into consideration.

Photo credit: Canva

"A picture frame that talks. My husband found a picture of our 3-year-old son and helped him record the message, 'I love you, Mommy.'"

— Anne, New York

"Gift certificates to a local spa."

— Susan, Canada

"A bottle of good scotch."

— Naomi, California

"My beautiful baby boy! He was born at 5:02 am last Mother's Day. And this Mother's Day, he took his first steps."

— Els-Mommy

"My daughter decorated a flower pot at preschool and then planted a flower in it. That flower is still growing beautifully, as is the child who planted it."

— Tracey, Canada

"The time my 3-year-old son slept until noon! I had a Sunday morning to myself to read the newspaper and drink my coffee while listening to him quietly sleeping."

— Sandra, Delaware

"On my first Mother's Day, my husband gave me a mother-and-baby charm with our daughter's birthstone in it. After our second daughter was born, he gave me another Mother's Day charm with both of our children's birthstones in it. I'm now pregnant with my third child, and am hoping for a third charm."

— Jodi, Michigan

"An ad in 'Newsday' wishing me a happy first Mother's Day."

— Tracy, New York

"A picture collage of my son's first year."

— Dee, Texas

mothers day gift guide

Celebrate your unique bond with mom with a unique gift.

Photo credit: Canva

"A ruby ring."

— Terry, Illinois

"A shirt with my 22-month-old daughter's handprints and footprints."

— Amber, Florida

"A gift certificate for a weekend learn-to-surf clinic for women. Getting to spend a weekend having fun in the water was such a treat (and a killer workout)."

— Nancy, California

"A bright, homemade bracelet made of mix-and-match beads. I wore it all day, and I still have it in my jewelry box."

— Mildred, Canada

It’s easy to see why these choices were winners. They either give mom a much needed break or give her a memento to cherish. These are clearly intended to make her feel special and appreciated.

But just like no two moms are alike, there is no one-size-fits all approach when it comes to getting the perfect Mother’s Day gift. Thankfully, Leah Rocketto, BabyCenter’s associate commerce director, provided a few pointers.

First, gift etiquette differs between gift givers. For partners, gifts should “show appreciation, support, and acknowledgment of her transition into motherhood.” That can range from the sentimental, like a piece of jewelry with her baby’s birth stone, to something that encourages self-care, like an at-home back massager. It all depends on what mom wants as an individual. And Baby Center assures that “she won’t be mad if you ask for hints or suggestions!”

As for children looking to get mom a gift, the possibilities are endless, as long as they represent the unique bond shared between the two. Handmade crafts are totally welcome, as long as they come from the heart.

mothers day 2024

No two moms are alike. So there is no one-size-fits all approach when it comes to Mother's Day gifts.

Photo credit: Canva

There’s also the different stages of motherhood to consider, be it mothers-in-law, grandmothers, and moms of 3+ kids as well as new moms. Here’s what Rocketto suggests:

Mother-in-law: What you give your mother-in-law will vary depending on your relationship with her. If you’re not super close but still want to celebrate her, a card and flowers are a safe bet and will do just fine. If you’re closer, you can gift her an experience, like dinner at her favorite restaurant or a spa day for the two of you.

Grandmother: You can’t go wrong with a sentimental angle. A craft from her grandchild never disappoints, like an artistic rendition of a family tree from her grandchildren which can be a fun way to get them to create something that also leaves a lasting reminder for grandma of her family's love and legacy. If you want to add something from you, consider a piece of art or jewelry that acknowledges her transition from mother to grandmother. A plaque featuring the names and birth flowers of her children and grandchildren, for example, or a piece of jewelry with her grandchildren’s initials, are great options. You can also tap into nostalgia with a family photo album or scrapbook with doodles and notes from her grandchild in the margins.

New mom: First and foremost, do not give a new mom (or any mom) something for her child. This is, after all, a day to celebrate and show appreciation for her. Again, sentimental and customizable gifts will always win. A necklace with her baby’s birthstone, a bouquet of her baby’s birth flowers, or even a keepsake frame with a photo alongside her baby’s handprint or footprint. And while a trip to the spa or a night out are also good ideas, be mindful of the fact that not all new moms can easily schedule time outside of the house.

Gift-giving, when done thoughtfully, is a wonderful way to make someone feel truly loved. Hopefully this little guide helps you make the mom in your life experience that.

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5 ways people are going "All In" this week

From the silly to the sentimental, there are so many ways people like to go “all in” on something. Here are our five favorite examples this week.

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When you hear the words “all in,” what do you think? You might picture a color-coordinated, fairy-themed surprise proposal that took months to create, or maybe you think of a singer who went on stage and nailed the perfect high note in front of everyone (like this girl). Whatever you picture, the idea is the same: Going “all in” means doing something with total commitment—literally giving it your “all” and going completely over the top. No second guessing, no holding back—just full-throttle enthusiasm with some creativity and flair thrown in. That’s how we get those viral internet moments we can’t stop watching.

When people decide to go “all in,” something special usually happens as a result, and we’re here to show you how. This week, we’ve found the very best examples of people going “all in” across the Internet—moments where passion, creativity, and commitment take center stage. Follow along and feel inspired.

Hamilton superfans 

@itz.unique POV: You seen Hamilton the first night in theaters #hamiltonmusical #fyp #relatable #hamilton ♬ original sound - Uniii 😜

You already know we love a good Hamilton reenactment. This past weekend, though, Hamilton fans took their love for the musical to a whole other level. As theatres released the filmed stage production in honor of the musical’s tenth anniversary on Broadway, theatre kids everywhere showed up in costume and belted out every single word (it’s okay to sing in the theatre this time, by the way! Hamilton creator and star Lin-Manuel Miranda totally said we could). Some theatres sang along quietly, some chimed in loudly at the emotional parts, and some theatres truly went all in, staging elaborate reproductions of the scenes in the aisles, in time with the music. A bunch of theatre kids totally nerding out together, having fun, and celebrating good art? We love to see it.

Everyone's love of Pumpkin Spice Lattes

@deangelodbyrd It’s hereeee 😂🍂 #pumpkinspicelatte #fall2025 #funnyvideo #silly #funnydance @Starbucks ♬ original sound - DeAngelo

You know it's fall when you start seeing those plastic cups everywhere. That's right—it's Pumpkin Spice Latte season. Everyone is drinking them. Everyone is posting about them. Everyone is figuring out the perfect PSL pairing, whether that's pumpkin spice matcha lattes or just drinking a PSL curled up on the couch watching some spooky movies. (How about all of the above?)

Here's our recommendation: Pumpkin spice lattes pair perfectly with All In snack bars—specifically the Madagascar Vanilla + Almond option. It's got honey, it's got pumpkin seeds, and it's even got tons of fiber so you're getting some nutrition along with all the deliciousness. Don't take our word for it, though: Click here to try it yourself (for free).

This rendition of the Happy Birthday song

@kamoramakaylee Happy 84th birthday to our dad #tbt ♬ original sound - Kamora

There’s singing the Happy Birthday song, and then there’s singing the Happy Birthday song. This group of sisters did the latter. For their father’s birthday, they presented him with a cake (aww) and then launched into an embellished musical production of the last two lines that would put Whitney Houston to shame. The girls truly went all in, but perhaps the best part of this entire video is their dad,sitting wide-eyed at the table and gritting his teeth until the performance is over. (“He’s fine,” someone said in the comments section. “He lost his hearing ten birthdays ago.”)

Llama costumes

@kristeninmn Some of the costumes from the Minnesota State Fair’s 4-H Llama-Alpaca Costume Contest! #minnesotastatefair #mnstatefair #exploremn #onlyinmn #stpaulminnesota ♬ Mr. Blue Sky - Electric Light Orchestra

Every year at the Minnesota State Fair, the 4-H Llama-Alpaca Costume Contest steals the show. In it, participants dress their llamas in wildly imaginative costumes—everything from a sea anemone to a bucket of popcorn to Buzz Lightyear from the movie Toy Story—and transform the livestock barn into a whimsical runway. Every glittery cape, hand-painted prop, or themed outfit is a testament to their creativity, their time and effort, and most importantly their love for animals. All of it is on full display and it’s seriously impressive work. You can tell when it comes to their animals (and creativity), Minnesotans don’t hold back.

This dog who's totally faking it. 

@binkythechichi2

The king of drama

♬ original sound - cass

Okay, you have to give this guy some respect—he really doesn’t want his owner to go to work and he’s found an absolutely genius way of showing it. As soon as her alarm goes off in the morning, TikTok creator Cassidy Butler shared that her chihuahua Binky runs to the front door and actually starts faking injuries to get her to stay home with him (and sometimes, she admits, it works). Binky is absolutely committed, holding up his paw as though it were injured, plus shivering and even squinting one eye to show just how injured he is. He’s almost perfectly convincing—until Cassidy offers to take him outside to play and he momentarily breaks character. Oops! Still, we respect his dedication to the craft.

Snag your free (!!) snack bars here while this deal lasts. Just pick up a box at Sprouts and text a pic of your receipt to get it for free. Enoy!

Andrew Huberman and a woman sleeping.

There is nothing worse than lying in your bed, with your mind racing, and you can’t fall asleep. The longer you lie in bed, the more anxious you get about falling asleep, which makes it even harder to catch some ZZZs. You've tried clearing your mind, but can’t. You’ve tried counting sheep but reached 100. What do you do now?

On a recent Real Time with Bill Maher, neuroscientist Andrew Huberman made an off-the-cuff remark about a sleep hack that he swears by, and it's based on brain research. Huberman is a Stanford University neuroscientist and tenured professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology. He's also the host of the popular podcast Huberman Lab, which focuses on health and science.

How to fall asleep fast

“In fact, if you wake up in the middle of the night and you're having trouble falling back asleep, try just doing some long, extended exhales. And get this, this sounds really weird, but it has a basis in physiology. Keep your eyes closed and just move your eyes from side to side behind your eyelids like this, back and forth,” Huberman told Maher as he moved his eyes from side to side as if he was surveying a vast landscape. “Do some long exhales. I can't promise, but I'm willing to wager like maybe one pinky, that within five minutes or so, you'll be back to sleep.”

- YouTube youtu.be

Andrew Huberman’s hack is based on neuroscience

Huberman explained the exercise in greater detail on Mark Bell's Power Project podcast. In his appearance, he discussed the interesting connection between our eyes and their connection to the amygdala, an almond-shaped part of the brain that controls our emotional response. “Eye movements of that sort actually do suppress the amygdala [to] make people feel calmer, less fearful,” Huberman said. He adds that when we are on a walk, we move our eyes from side to side, to analyze the terrain ahead of us, and the amygdala calms down.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

“But for most people who are sighted, moving your eyes from side to side for 10 to 30 seconds is going to calm you down," Huberman said. "And this makes really good sense because, from an evolutionary perspective, an adaptive perspective, we've always been confronted with interpersonal threats and animal to human threats. Forward movement is the way that you suppress the fear response."

Americans aren’t getting enough sleep

Huberman’s video is important because many Americans need to get more sleep. A 2022 Gallup poll found that only 32% of Americans said they got “excellent” or “very good” sleep; 35% described their sleep as “good”; and 33% said their sleep was “fair” or “poor.”

Sleep is essential to maintaining good health. Getting at least seven hours of sleep a night is great for your memory, focus, emotional regulation, appetite, muscle recovery, and tissue repair. It also reduces the risk of chronic conditions like heart disease and diabetes. It’s great that Huberman shares his hack, which few people would have come up with without a background in neuroscience, to improve their sleep. It’s also another exciting way to show just how interconnected the body is, from eyes to brain and beyond. Sweet dreams.

Sandra visiting E’s family in Georgia (2023)

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Levi Strauss Foundation

Sandra McAnany isn’t one to sit on the sidelines. A 58-year-old grandmother from Wisconsin, McAnany spends her days teaching soft skills classes to adults and spending time with her family. Outside the classroom, however, she’s taken on a role that’s helping people in a big way: serving as a humanitarian parole sponsor and personally taking on the financial responsibility of supporting families fleeing from persecution, violence, and instability.

Since 2023, McAnany has welcomed 17 migrants—11 adults and six children through the CHNV humanitarian parole program, which allows individuals and families from Cuba, Haiti, Nicaragua and Venezuela to live and work temporarily in the United States with the support of an approved sponsor.

“Everyone has their own views and perspectives, but every person I sponsored is thriving and doing well here,” McAnany said.

McAnany didn’t know any of the parolees before sponsoring them, but she had a commitment to helping families from Venezuela specifically, hoping to reunite them with their families who were already living in the United States. After “praying a lot along the way” and communicating with the applicants through WhatsApp, she decided to apply as a sponsor and help them settle into the United States.

“I have a bedroom and a bathroom in my basement,” McAnany says. “My door is open and will always be open for any of the people I sponsored, if they ever have a need for housing.”

Sandra’s granddaughter, E’s daughter, and another friend at an indoor park (July 2025)

At the time, McAnany decided to volunteer as a sponsor to make friends and help other people through hardship. Now, her mission has grown: Seeing how humanitarian parole programs have changed her parole beneficiaries’ lives—as well as her own—for the better.

Humanitarian parole: A long history

Humanitarian parole programs are nothing new. Since 1952, both Democratic and Republican administrations have used humanitarian parole to provide a safer, lawful pathway for noncitizens to enter and live temporarily in the United States. In recent years, through different programs, people from Afghanistan, Ukraine, Cuba, Haiti, and other countries have been able to come to the U.S. to escape urgent crises in their own countries, such as political instability or war.

Coming to the United States through humanitarian parole is no easy feat. The process has its own strict criteria and involves extensive applications and vetting for both beneficiaries and their sponsors. Parolees don’t need to qualify for any other immigration benefit like asylum, but they need to meet the standard for humanitarian parole and successfully pass vetting requirements.

According to Refugees International, 532,000 people have been granted parole through the CHNV program.

A life-changing experience

From the moment she met her first parole beneficiaries at the airport—two families —McAnany already knew it would be a life-changing experience. “It immediately felt like family, like we were lifelong friends,” she said. But she could also sense that it was a culture shock for the parolees. On the way home from the airport, McAnany pulled into a nearby McDonald's and encouraged them to order dinner. Hearing the word “Big Mac,” the families smiled in recognition.

Despite the culture shock, McAnany’s parole beneficiaries had to adapt quickly to life in the United States. Once they were settled, McAnany worked “nonstop” to help the families acclimate to their new lives, answering questions about school and vaccinations while also helping them create resumes, search for jobs, and find English classes online.

It was through this process that McAnany realized just how resilient people could be, and was amazed “not only how hard it was for individuals to leave their loved ones behind, but the amount of work they did to come to the country and remain here.” McAnany also realized how fortunate she was to have her own family living nearby. “I can’t imagine any one of us leaving a country and being apart for an unknown length of time,” she said.

Eventually, and as circumstances changed—one of the parolees found a new job in another city, for example, and was able to move out. But no matter the length of time they spent with each other, McAnany says that with every parolee they formed a bond built for life. One woman, who she refers to as ‘E,’ has even become “like an adopted daughter.” McAnany has traveled to Georgia, where E now lives, three times to visit her.

Uncertain ground: What’s next for humanitarian parole programs

Despite being a critical part of immigration policy in the United States for the last 73 years, humanitarian parole programs are under threat. Immigrant justice nonprofits Justice Action Center and Human Rights First are currently suing the federal government to protect humanitarian parole programs and allow parole beneficiaries to remain in the country for the duration of their parole. McAnany is a plaintiff in the lawsuit.

One of the ladies Sandra sponsored from Venezuela and her partner during Sandra’s first visit to meet her (December 2023)

Participating in the lawsuit has only further bolstered McAnany’s belief in and support for humanitarian parole programs. She hopes the lawsuit will be successful, she says, so that parole beneficiaries and their families can finally have some stability.

“We don’t know what the future is,” she says, “but I want to be optimistic and hopeful that every person I sponsored will be able to stay here safely in the U.S. and continue to thrive.”

This article is part of Upworthy’s “The Threads Between U.S.” series that highlights what we have in common thanks to the generous support from the Levi Strauss Foundation, whose grantmaking is committed to creating a culture of belonging.


Public Domain, Poul Steffensen/Public Domain

Hundreds and thousands of years ago people ate foods that are now extinct. But they might not be for long.

The history of food is absolutely fascinating. Human beings have come up with some pretty weird stuff, like turning rotten milk into cheese, drinking old grape juice because it makes us feel warm and fuzzy, and following the lead of giddy goats that were buzzing after eating coffee beans.

Our diets have changed drastically over the centuries. Simply put, the ancient Roman mind could not have comprehended the concept of Flamin' Hot Cheetos.

However, a lot of the crops and animals we used to eat have gone extinct, or nearly so. Some fell out of favor, but some were beloved and simply lost to history, over-farming, disease, or random chance.

In some cases, food scientists and researchers are actively trying to bring them back. Maybe we'll be able to taste a few of these delicacies again one day.

Almota apples (and dozens of others)

almota apples, apples, foods, humans, nature Artist's rendering of the Taliaferro appleBy Taliaferro1776 - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0

Think there are a lot of different kinds of apples at the grocery store? While there are quite a few—about 20 kinds that make up most apple sales—there used to be hundreds of unique, interesting types of apples available for people to eat.

David Benscoter, founder of the Lost Apple Project, recently discovered seven apple breeds that were once thought extinct, including delicious options like the Almota apple, the Ivanhoe, the Eper, and the Iowa Flat. The Lost Apple Project is dedicated to regrowing these lost fruits.

The Taliaferro apple, in fact, was a favorite of Thomas Jefferson, who called it the best apple for making cyder due to its intense juiciness.

The Ansault Pear

ansault pear, pear, fruit, extinct foods, nature An illustration of the ansault pear.Public Domain

The Ansault pear was described in the 1921 book The Pears of New York as having a rich, buttery flavor. "Flesh tinged with yellow, granular at the center, melting and tender, buttery, very juicy, sweet, aromatic," author U. P. Hedrick observed. He also noted that the tree was not well-suited to commercial orchards, which gives a good clue as to why it ultimately did not survive into the 20th century.

Too bad, because it sounds delicious.

The auroch

Aurochs were an ancient breed of giant cattle, first used by humans over 10,000 years ago for their meat, milk, hides, and bones, according to the Natural History Museum. The domestication of these beasts was central to the development of modern agriculture.

The auroch went extinct around 1627 after disease, habitat destruction, and over-hunting took its toll.

However, some scientists think the aurochs are a keystone species that can positively affect biodiversity, and are trying to bring them back. For science, of course, and not for delicious burgers. Modern Farmer notes that the auroch was leaner and produced less meat than modern cows, and that “their meat almost has a wild taste: It is marbled, tender and juicy and full of omega 3 and 6, vitamins like B12 and E, and iron.”

auroch, auroch cow, extinction, nature, extinct foods Artist's rendering of an aurochBy Jochen Ackermann - Own work, CC BY-SA 3.0


Mammoths

You probably already know that the great woolly mammoth is long-since extinct. You might not know that early humans actually ate these gigantic animals on the regular. They were a great source of protein!

Thirteen thousand years ago during the Ice Age, humans didn't just eat mammoths here and there—the hairy beasts were actually a staple of the human diet.

If you've ever wondered what woolly mammoth tasted like, some explorers in 1901 came across a frozen mammoth so well-preserved that they prepared it into a feast. The mammoth steaks were a hit—"which all the learned guests declared was agreeable to the taste, and not much tougher than some of the sirloin furnished by butchers of today," noted The Atlantic.

Scientists have been working on "de-extincting" the woolly mammoth for a long time now. The best we've got so far is an Asian elephant with lots of hair due to gene editing. Even if we do resurrect the mammoths, you probably won't get to eat one, but it's fun to imagine a gigantic mammoth steak.

Silphium

siphium, plant, seasoning, extinct food, nature, aphrodisiac Silphium, part seasoning, part aphrodisiacPublic Domain

To the ancient Greeks and Romans, silphium was a pantry staple just like garlic, salt, and pepper are for us. The stalks could be cooked and eaten like broccoli, while the rest of it was turned into a delectable seasoning. They put that stuff on everything!

The Greek botanist Theophrastus described silphium as being closely related to fennel, which many of us are familiar with in the modern world. But unlike fennel, silphium was said to have medicinal, spiritual, and even sexual properties. It was said to be a powerful aphrodisiac and, weirdly, even a contraceptive.

Unfortunately, silphium only grew in one specific part of Northern Africa and was not suitable to wider farming. It went extinct thousands of years ago, but that hasn't stopped scientists from looking for ways to revive or recreate it.

Judean date palm

judean date palm, plant, plants, extinct, trees, ancient trees This date palm tree was grown from a 2,000 year old seed.By DASonnenfeld - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0

Another delectable fruit lost to history, the Judean date palm was extremely popular in biblical times. Not only was it well-regarded for its delicious tastes all throughout Israel and the surrounding region, the date palm, like silphium, was said to have medicinal properties and to be a powerful aphrodisiac.

Amazingly, scientists were able to revive the Judean date palm in 2005 thanks to modern agriculture techniques and a preserved, 2000-year-old seed. One of the lead scientists on the project was lucky enough to taste one of the fruits and described it as, "Not as sweet as the Medjool date, not sticky at all, and with a pleasant honey aftertaste."

A lack of biodiversity in modern farming, along with climate change, habitat destruction, over-farming, and more, means many more crops are in danger of disappearing forever.

Certain varieties of bananas, dragon fruits, and mangos are considered critically endangered. Even our beloved avocados are at risk as the climate crisis worsens.

Seed sharing and supporting small, local farmers are two simple ways to support better biodiversity—especially when it comes to fruits and veggies. It's also important that we continue to fund and support the sciences, both in their efforts to ward off climate change and in exciting experiments to "un-extinct" fascinating crops and animals from our history.

No, we probably won't be seeing mammoth burgers on restaurant menus in our lifetime, but it may be possible to sink your teeth into a new kind of apple you've never heard of before, or taste a honey-sweet date from biblical times. That kind of cultural connection to our ancestors is really exciting to think about.

Elya/Wikimedia Commons

Should you hang the toilet paper roll over or under?

Humans have debated things large and small over the millennia, from democracy to breastfeeding in public to how often people ought to wash their sheets. But perhaps the most silly-yet-surprisingly heated household debate is the one in which we argue over which way to hang the toilet paper roll.

The "over or under" question has plagued marriages and casual acquaintances alike for over 100 years, with both sides convinced they have the soundest reasoning for putting their toilet paper loose end out or loose end under. Some people feel so strongly about right vs. wrong TP hanging that they will even flip the roll over when they go to the bathroom in the homes of strangers.

Contrary to popular belief, it's not merely an inconsequential preference. According to health experts and the man who invented the toilet paper roll, there is actually a "correct" way to hang toilet paper.

What is the correct way to hang a roll of toilet paper?

First, let's be clear about what we're even talking about here with a visual. In the image below, left is "over" and right is "under."

toilet paper, bathrooms, over or under, toilet roll, bathroom etiquette Toilet paper hung "over" (left) and "under" (right)Elya/Wikimedia Commons


So which one is the right way? According to health experts, "over" is the way to go.

"One key to maintaining a hygienic washroom is minimising contact between people and surfaces," Dr. Christian Moro, associate professor of health sciences and medicine at Bond University on Australia's Gold Coast, told Australian Broadcasting Corporation. "Depending on the type of roll holder, [hanging the toilet paper "over"] often lowers the chance that a user will touch the wall behind when fishing for paper, leaving germs behind on that surface which can be spread to the next user."

Picture it: Grabbing the end of the toilet paper when it's hung "over" means you only touch the part of the toilet paper you're going to use. When it's "under," you sometimes have to fish for it or scrape your fingers on the wall in order to grab the loose end. In addition to whatever might be on people's hands already, think about all the people who wipe twice, potentially transferring fresh fecal matter or other bacteria to the wall on the second pass, which then get picked up by other people who inadvertently touch that wall when trying to grab their TP.

Theoretically, we all should have become better hand washers during the pandemic, scrubbing with soap for the full 20 seconds it takes to remove bacteria. But I wouldn't be willing to bet on it.

toilet paper, empty toilet paper roll, batthroom, bathroom etiquette, over or under Empty toilet paper roll.via Canva/Photos

And touching any surface in a bathroom is pretty nasty, according to a study from the University of Colorado. As Inc. reported: "Using a high-tech genetic sequencing tool, researchers identified 19 groups of bacteria on the doors, floors, faucet handles, soap dispensers, and toilets of 12 public restrooms in Colorado — six men’s restrooms and six women’s restrooms. Many of the bacteria strains identified could be transmitted by touching contaminated surfaces."

Bacteria means things like e.coli, which is a common source of food poisoning and one of the most common bacteria found on bathroom surfaces in the study. If you've ever had a bout of food poisoning, I'm sure you'll agree that a toilet paper roll hanging preference isn't worth risking it.

But sanitary health concerns aren't the only argument for the "over" camp. After all, the original patent for the toilet paper roll, issued in 1891, clearly shows the TP in the "over" position. Thank you for the clarity right from the get go, Mr. Wheeler.

toilet paper, bathrooms, over or under, toilet roll, bathroom etiquette The toilet paper roll was patented by Seth Wheeler in 1891.Public Domain


In Wheeler's patent, the perforated toilet paper hangs on a roll in the "over" position. In the words of the patent, the sheets of TP are “partially separated, having their points of attachment arranged in a novel manner, whereby each sheet will easily separate from the series as it is drawn from the roll, there being no litter occasioned, and any waste of paper is thereby prevented.”

Now, before the "under" folks come running with their pitchforks, there are some understandable exceptions to the "over" rule. Namely: cats and kids.

If you have a furry friend or a tiny toddler who likes to unroll the toilet paper roll, "over" makes it super fun for them, while "under" stops them in their tracks. For many people, cats and kids are the primary motivator of their TP hanging habits.

That doesn't change the fact that "over" is actually the "correct" way to hang toilet paper according to health science and the inventor's intention, of course, but "under" is certainly preferable to having a pile of TP on the floor.

Now go forth, do that with information as you will, and try to make peace with your over vs. under rivals.

This article originally appeared last year.

Mel Robbins and a woman looking at her smartphone.

Most people have a few hundred or more followers on social media, and it can be paralyzing to post something because even if you express a rather bland opinion, it’s bound to bother someone. It's also nerve-racking to post a photo of yourself or your family because you may be judged on your appearance.

You have a joke? Someone might find it unfunny. Went on vacation? A friend may subtly brag that they went somewhere nicer. Went out for a nice dinner? Your dietary choices may face scrutiny. Lost a few pounds and want to show off how good you look? You know who may get jealous.

How to post on social media without fear

The problem is, you’re letting others subtly control how you express yourself on social media. Mel Robbins, a podcast host, author, motivational speaker, and former lawyer, offers empowering advice for those holding you back: Let them.

@melrobbins

This is your sign to stop giving away your control to other people’s opinions… If you find that you take things personally, worry what other people think about you, are scared of being judged, or find that you can’t stop overthinking, you need to hear this episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast 🎧 “How to Stop Caring What People Think of You.” #melrobbins #melrobbinspodcast #letthem #peoplepleasing

“I want to remind you of something," Robbins says in a TikTok video. "Your social media is for your self-expression. It's for your business. It's for your artistry. It's not for your sorority sisters from college. It's not for your family. It's not for the women in your mother’s group. It's for you."

She adds that people’s reactions to your post are something that you have no control over. Instead, Robbins believes that you should take your life back by letting go of the need to control how others react to you.

Robbins' theory is so popular that she wrote an entire book about it, entitled The Let Them Theory.

“Let them think a negative thought about what you're gonna post," Robbins adds. "Let them unfollow you. Let them roll their eyes. Let them gossip. You can't control any of it anyway. The only thing you can control is you can control what you think of yourself...Let them think something negative. Let them do something negative, like unfollow you or write some comment or whatever...Let them know that the power is not in someone else. The power is in you.”

grandma, grand daughter, social media, photos, smartphone, park bench A granddaughter shares her social media post with grandmother.via Canva/Photos

Robbins is also clear that she’s talking about people looking to make posts about their business, a creative endeavor, or something about themselves that shows that they aren’t perfect. A lot of Robbins' work is about how to deal with difficult and toxic people, so she’s clearly not pushing people to feel free to make provocative posts that antagonize people, but to have the confidence to express themselves without worrying about pleasing everyone.

What is the locus of control?

Robbins' advice has its roots in psychology, in a concept known as the locus of control. It’s the extent to which people feel that the outcomes in their life are based on what they do (internal control orientation) or on events outside their personal control (external control orientation). When we say “Let them” to any host of reactions we get from people, we switch the locus of control to an internal setting, where we believe that by being unattached to opinions, we can better control the outcomes in our lives.

Next time you’re feeling a little trepidation before hitting “post,” don’t forget Robbins’ mantra: Let them. Their opinions don’t define you, but your willingness to share authentically does. Your social media feeds are your page to express your voice, not a monument to others’ expectations.

Pop Culture

Real women trying on 'micro shorts' is the comedy gold we didn't know we needed

Proof we don't need to force ourselves to fit into trends…unless we're needing a good laugh.

Women are trying Free People's 'micro shorts' with hilarious commentary

With every season, comes a new trendy fashion item that retailers push as the must-have piece. But as we know, no trend is universally flattering.

Case and point, last year, when Free People, a specialty lifestyle brand for bohemian styled fashion, released its "micro shorts," which, as you can probably guess, are teeny tiny. They might check off all the requirements for a pair of shorts...except, they appear to be about the length of underwear.

If you're thinking "there's no way those would look good," you're not wrong! And to prove that point, a couple of women bought some to try on so you don't have to. The videos are not only honest but hilarious.

In one video Nicole Walters, a New York Times best selling author and mom to three girls, decided to order the shorts to see how they looked on someone with, "thigh meat." She wears a size 12 and often jokes about being a curvier on the bottom. When she pulled the shorts out, it looked as if she was going to have to perform a magic trick to get them on. They looked to be the size a small child would wear, but they seemed to have gone on easily even though they looked extremely uncomfortable. She looked uncomfortable. The viewers likely looked uncomfortable.

"Oh wow. They're in there and by in there I mean everywhere. There's a lot of thigh meat happening right now in the, this region," Walters says as she gestures at her upper thighs. "There's some thigh meat, um...uh...I feel like they're definitely in some places that I didn't know I had."

Walter's review of the shorts has people in stitches as she jokes about her Christianity falling out of the shorts.

"It’s the Barbie walk for me lol!!! Thank you for your service," one person says.

"The way you warn us that you’re going to turn around almost made me scream with laughter," someone writes.

"I'm just going to go ahead and dial 911 for help bc looks like you may need the jaws of life to come out them shorts...lol!! Your commentary had me dying laughing..lol," another commenter jokes.

In another Free People "micro shorts" try on video, Nicole Story Dent braved the itty bitty shorts to show her audience the summer trend they can look forward to seeing. The first pair of shorts has multiple flaps that appear to be large pockets which inspires Dent to pretend to fly in them before the discomfort sinks in.

"It's kinda giving waitress...if they ever want to make a Waffle House-Hooters hybrid, we have their uniform, "she said. "We have been asking for more pockets so they delivered. Speaking of delivered, you could deliver a baby without having to take these shorts off."

Dent guessed that the shorts would be more like "jundies" or "janties" than jorts, the shorthand term for jean shorts. Commenters couldn't stop laughing at her description of the shorts while others provided her with words of wisdom.

"Do NOT drop it low in these jundies, that kind of contact with the club floor is NOT hygienic," someone wrote.

"'There is nothing vegan about these. There is absolutely a cat being harmed!' I’m cackling! You really should win something from Free People for this! @freepeople we found your next model," another person joked.

"This is the kind of content the internet was made for, it’s just so good. However my thighs started getting chafed just watching this," added a third.

If you're brave enough to give these micro shorts a try, go ahead and stock up on some baby powder for all the chaffing. However, it's all about long Bermuda shorts this year. And since no one can keep up with fashion's rapid pace anyway, why not just stick with what feels good?

This article originally appeared last year.