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Drew Barrymore writes raw, honest Mother's Day blog detailing her stay in rehab as a teen

A great read for those who have mom challenges of their own.

drew barrymore, mothers day

Drew Barrymore has always had a complicated relationship with her mother.

Drew Barrymore made a recent blog post in honor of Mother’s Day reflecting on her own complicated mother-daughter relationship, which eventually led to the actress and talk show host filing for emancipation at the age of 14.

Barrymore has long been candid about having a turbulent childhood, and in her blog post, she details being sent by her mother to a mental health facility in her adolescence, where she spent two years in the center's youth program attending individual and group therapy.


While going to rehab was certainly a humbling experience for the teen star, looking back she can confirm it was also a “revelatory” one, particularly in the way she viewed the importance of adults setting up protective structures for kids.

“I understand now: kids love feeling safe, and having boundaries is one of those crucial bumper rails. I lived a boundaryless life and job. And this place, as hellacious as it was, it was exactly what I needed from the too much excess my life had become on the outside,” she wrote.

During that time, she also learned the importance of advocating for one’s own emotional needs, even if that means putting distance between themselves and those they dearly love. Certainly a relatable lesson for many.

“It taught me the foundations of telling your truth…Your feelings. Your faults. Your hopes and wishes. Your hurts. What and where you wanted to get to in life,” she wrote. “And—very important—who was going to help you on your path and who would you have to let go. For me…it was my mother.”

When Barrymore did emancipate from her mother, there was a newfound sense of freedom (“the umbilical cord was severed,” she wrote). But still, she had to learn to reparent herself and somehow establish a structure she had never been taught. No easy task.

“I cannot give myself rave reviews. I drank too much. Partied and burned the candle at every end. I danced on desks and posed half-naked in the name of art. Nothing I judge. It’s my history. I was just trying to figure out how to grow up and who I wanted to become,” she shared.

Though over the years she has found a way to bring stability into her life, Barrymore admitted that being a mother “constantly triggers everything from my own childhood now,” especially since today, with social media providing “everything at your fingertips,” kids live in a similar world to what she grew up in. “It is the world I promised my daughters wouldn’t experience…and yet all our kids are in it now,” she shared.

And still, she declared that being a mom is the “greatest thing” she will ever do in her life.

“Everything in my experience here on this pale blue dot has been for them,” she wrote. “And now it is also my chance to not make it about me but learn how to deal with all that comes with choosing to be a parent.”

As for her current relationship with her mom, Barrymore finished her blog post by sharing that it had recently been her mother’s birthday. After sending a quick and simple birthday message, her mother wrote back, “Thank you so much! I’m incredibly proud of you and send you love,” which felt like the “greatest gift.”

And to her girls, Barrymore had this sweet Mother’s Day message: I just hope I can be someone who makes you feel safe,” she wrote. “And that you can laugh with. And that you can tell me anything. I’m here for it. I’m in the circle with you… for life.”

Barrymore has a reputation for being raw and honest, but fans seemed more profoundly struck by the vulnerability of this essay.

"I love your openness and honesty about what you have been through and experienced. Your example helps those you struggle in their own ways to see past the step they are on in this thing called life and know you can continue in whatever way/path you choose,” one person commented on Barrymore’s Instagram.

Another wrote, “Thank you! For your openness, for sharing and for fighting to be different and be yourself, for helping me set my heart at peace and know I am being true to myself. Happy Mother’s Day you beautiful human!”

Mother’s Day can indeed be a complicated time for many. The holiday can trigger feelings of loss, betrayal, resentment, yearning, fear—maybe all of the above and all at once—if someone’s relationship with their own mom was/is turbulent. There has been more awareness and sensitivity around this in recent years. Many companies have even given the option for customers to opt out of any Mother’s Day-related messaging.

No matter what wounds our mothers might have left us with, open conversations can be healing, be it online, in therapy groups or in our close friend circles. Who knows, it might just provide that bit of nurturing the soul has been searching for all along.

If you’d like to read Barrymore’s full blog post, click here.

Identity

Celebrate International Women's Day with these stunning photos of female leaders changing the world

The portraits, taken by acclaimed photographer Nigel Barker, are part of CARE's "She Leads the World" campaign.

Images provided by CARE

Kadiatu (left), Zainab (right)

True

Women are breaking down barriers every day. They are transforming the world into a more equitable place with every scientific discovery, athletic feat, social justice reform, artistic endeavor, leadership role, and community outreach project.

And while these breakthroughs are happening all the time, International Women’s Day (Mar 8) is when we can all take time to acknowledge the collective progress, and celebrate how “She Leads the World.

This year, CARE, a leading global humanitarian organization dedicated to empowering women and girls, is celebrating International Women’s Day through the power of portraiture. CARE partnered with high-profile photographer Nigel Barker, best known for his work on “America’s Next Top Model,” to capture breathtaking images of seven remarkable women who have prevailed over countless obstacles to become leaders within their communities.

“Mabinty, Isatu, Adama, and Kadiatu represent so many women around the world overcoming incredible obstacles to lead their communities,” said Michelle Nunn, President and CEO of CARE USA.

Barker’s bold portraits, as part of CARE’s “She Leads The World” campaign, not only elevate each woman’s story, but also shine a spotlight on how CARE programs helped them get to where they are today.

About the women:

Mabinty

international womens day, care.org

Mabinty is a businesswoman and a member of a CARE savings circle along with a group of other women. She buys and sells groundnuts, rice, and fuel. She and her husband have created such a successful enterprise that Mabinty volunteers her time as a teacher in the local school. She was the first woman to teach there, prompting a second woman to do so. Her fellow teachers and students look up to Mabinty as the leader and educator she is.

Kadiatu

international womens day, care.org

Kadiatu supports herself through a small business selling food. She also volunteers at a health clinic in the neighboring village where she is a nursing student. She tests for malaria, works with infants, and joins her fellow staff in dancing and singing with the women who visit the clinic. She aspires to become a full-time nurse so she can treat and cure people. Today, she leads by example and with ambition.

Isatu

international womens day, care.org

When Isatu was three months pregnant, her husband left her, seeking his fortune in the gold mines. Now Isatu makes her own way, buying and selling food to support her four children. It is a struggle, but Isatu is determined to be a part of her community and a provider for her kids. A single mother of four is nothing if not a leader.

Zainab

international womens day, care.org

Zainab is the Nurse in Charge at the Maternal Child Health Outpost in her community. She is the only nurse in the surrounding area, and so she is responsible for the pre-natal health of the community’s mothers-to-be and for the safe delivery of their babies. In a country with one of the world’s worst maternal death rates, Zainab has not lost a single mother. The community rallies around Zainab and the work she does. She describes the women who visit the clinic as sisters. That feeling is clearly mutual.

Adama

international womens day, care.org

Adama is something few women are - a kehkeh driver. A kehkeh is a three-wheeled motorcycle taxi, known elsewhere as a tuktuk. Working in the Kissy neighborhood of Freetown, Adama is the primary breadwinner for her family, including her son. She keeps her riders safe in other ways, too, by selling condoms. With HIV threatening to increase its spread, this is a vital service to the community.

Ya Yaebo

international womens day, care.org

“Ya” is a term of respect for older, accomplished women. Ya Yaebo has earned that title as head of her local farmers group. But there is much more than that. She started as a Village Savings and Loan Association member and began putting money into her business. There is the groundnut farm, her team buys and sells rice, and own their own oil processing machine. They even supply seeds to the Ministry of Agriculture. She has used her success to the benefit of people in need in her community and is a vocal advocate for educating girls, not having gone beyond grade seven herself.

On Monday, March 4, CARE will host an exhibition of photography in New York City featuring these portraits, kicking off the multi-day “She Leads the World Campaign.

Learn more, view the portraits, and join CARE’s International Women's Day "She Leads the World" celebration at CARE.org/sheleads.


Health

Over or under? Surprisingly, there actually is a 'correct' way to hang a toilet paper roll.

Let's settle this silly-but-surprisingly-heated debate once and for all.

Elya/Wikimedia Commons

Should you hang the toilet paper roll over or under?



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The "over or under" question has plagued marriages and casual acquaintances alike for over 100 years, with both sides convinced they have the soundest reasoning for putting their toilet paper loose end out or loose end under. Some people feel so strongly about right vs. wrong TP hanging that they will even flip the roll over when they go to the bathroom in the homes of strangers.

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Photo via iStock.

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