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I'm teaching my 6- and 7-year-old boys about consent. Here's how it's gone so far.

parenting, consent, education, sexuality, community
Photo by saeed karimi on Unsplash

The scenarios of parenting have many hurdles in order to offer a healthy way of approaching life.

The second week of first grade, my 6-year-old son came home and told me, very seriously, "Mama, I have a girlfriend, and I love her."

I didn't laugh at him or tell him he is too young to have a girlfriend, and I didn't minimize his feelings. We had a very serious conversation about his girlfriend: what he likes about her, what they talk about at lunch, and what games they play on the playground at recess. I asked questions about her; some he knew the answers to, and some he didn't.

Nearly every day after that for some time, we talked about his girlfriend, and in every conversation, in some way, we talked about consent — what it means, what it looks like, and how I expect him to act.

I didn't objectify the little girl by referring to her as "your little girlfriend" as I've heard other adults tease their own children. I didn't make jokes about him being a heartbreaker or tell him that the girls will be falling all over him by high school. I didn't tell him his feelings don't matter — and I definitely didn't tell him her feelings don't matter. I think the seeds of misogyny are planted with words as much as behavior, and I treated his emotions seriously because, for him, being in love for the first time is the most serious thing in the world. He will remember this little girl just as I remember my first boyfriend, and how I handle things now is setting the tone for the future.

I wasn't expecting to have these conversations in the context of a relationship quite so soon.

His older brother is more introverted, with the exception of the occasional fleeting crush. But I have been talking about consent and modeling it since my sons were babies.

The idea that young men need to learn about consent in high school or college goes hand-in-hand with the idea that sex education shouldn't be taught before then, either. Consent is an ongoing conversation in our home, framed to suit the situation. But now that my son has a girlfriend, I'm finding ways to introduce the concept of consent within a relationship on a level that he can understand.

From the time my sons were very little — before they could even talk — I started teaching them about body autonomy and consent.

"Do you want me to tickle you?" "Can I pick you up?" "Do you want me to brush your hair?"

I would ask whenever I could, waiting for their response before proceeding. Yes, of course, there are times when a young child needs to be picked up or hair needs to be brushed whether they want it or not, but there are just as many times when children can be given — and deserve — the right to choose. And so I let them decide whenever I can.

Teaching them that no one can touch them without permission was the first step in teaching them about respecting the boundaries of others.

I model the respect I expect them to extend to others. It is an ongoing lesson, as the most important lessons always are.

Of course they fight — what siblings don't? But I teach them that, whatever the game or activity, if someone says "Stop!" or "No!" they are to stop what they are doing.

To that end, I try to stay out of their squabbles and give them time to sort them out. If they don't stop, there are consequences. We talk about how it feels to have someone keep chasing, tickling, or bothering you when you've told them to stop. I watch their empathy for others grow as they consider how it feels to be little and have grownups want to touch their faces or hug them without permission. They're learning, and it gives me hope.

But now I'm having daily conversations with my youngest son about girlfriends and what is — and isn't — OK.

He knows he has to ask if she wants a hug before he touches her. He knows that it's rude to refer to her as "my girlfriend" when talking about her and that it's better, and more respectful, to use her name.

He knows that if he gives her a gift, he should give her a chance to respond instead of inundating her with more gifts. "Let's wait and see how she feels about this lovely picture you made her before you draw another one," I tell him, explaining how overwhelming it can be to have someone give you gifts when you're not ready for them or haven't had a chance to return the affection. Of course, I'm thinking about the boy I knew my junior year of high school who would constantly leave me trinkets of his affection at my locker — affection that wasn't reciprocated and made me uncomfortable, especially after I asked him to stop.

I don't know if I'm doing this right, honestly.

There are times when I think to myself, "But he's only 6! Why are we even having this conversation?" And then I remind myself, "If not now, when?"

I know what it means to be a girl in this world, and my sons are starting to hear my #MeToo stories, the ones they're old enough to understand. How do I talk about what's wrong in the world if I'm not willing to talk about the right behaviors, the right way to treat women?

I know my sons have a good role model in their father and in our marriage. I know they watch how my husband interacts with me, and I see it reflected in how they treat me. It's a start, but I know it's not enough in a world that sends mixed messages to boys about girls and how to treat them.

It's been eye-opening, seeing how my children regard consent.

I've seen how those early lessons in teaching them about their own right to say no have gone a long way in teaching them the empathy and respect they show for others now.

I know we're not done; we're only just starting. I know it's only going to get more complicated as they get older.

But at the end of the day, no matter their age, the core lesson is the same: respect people, care about how they are feeling in your interactions with them, and remember that others have a right to feel differently than you do and to set boundaries for what is OK with them. The situations will change, but those words will be repeated again and again.

Teaching consent is not a one-time discussion. It's something I want my sons to think about every single day.

This story originally appeared on Ravishly and is reprinted here with permission. More from Ravishly:

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    Millennials complain that their Boomer parents won't throw anything away. A psychologist explains why.

    "3 car garage...cannot fit a single car in there."

    boomer, boomers, boomer clutter, clutter, hoarding, too much stuff
    Photo credit: Canva

    A Baby Boomer stands in his cluttered garage.

    Millennials with Baby Boomer parents have not been shy about airing their complaints about the older generation. Millennials have previously noted that their parents tend to hoard food—and now they're are airing their grievances about Boomer "stuff avalanche."

    On Reddit, Millennials discussed their frustrations about their Boomer parents and the insane amount of junk they have in their homes that (allegedly) will one day be passed down to them to deal with. Many Millennials shared that it is a source of contention for them, and that they wish their parents would just throw things out.

    "3 car garage...cannot fit a single car in there," one commented. And another stated, "I am very concerned with the amount of junk my parents are holding onto."

    - YouTube www.youtube.com

    A fellow peeved Millennial added, "The worst part is that our parents think this is all worth lots and lots of money. Don’t worry kids, these three sets of china I’m saving for you will be worth millions!"

    Another had laid down the law: "My mom kept joking about all the 'stuff' being my inheritance. After a few times I was tired of it, I looked her dead in the face and said in the most monotone I could get. 'I will get the biggest dumpster I can, and it will all go in the trash.' She stopped making that joke, and my parents have been slowly throwing out their junk ever since."

    clutter, baby boomer stuff avalance, stuff, too much stuff, decluttering A Baby Boomer garage filled with stuff.Photo credit: Canva

    Why Boomers struggle to throw things away

    "The Boomer generation grew up in the post-war era shaped by rationing and economic rebuilding," Daniel Glazer, clinical psychologist and co-founder of US Therapy Rooms, tells Upworthy.

    He adds that the Boomer inability to let stuff go is often criticized, but when you look at the psychology of their attachment to objects, their behavior makes much more sense.

    "Not so long ago, saving things was an adaptive habit. 'That might come in handy' was a common refrain in households in which replacing something was not so easy, or affordable," says Glazer. "There is also an element of emotional security that comes from the things that have surrounded us through decades of life events, or even across a lifetime."

    And for many Boomers, getting rid of stuff can signify an even bigger mental battle.

    "As people age, there can also be an increased awareness of mortality," says Esin Pinarli, founder and holistic psychotherapist at Eternal Wellness Counseling. "Letting go of objects can feel symbolic, almost like letting go of chapters of their life. If no one is asking about those chapters anymore, those objects become the tangible proof that those experiences mattered. So it’s not stubbornness. It’s often about attachment, meaning-making, and a fear of losing relevance or erasing parts of their story."

    How to help Boomers declutter

    - YouTube www.youtube.com

    Starting the conversation with Boomer parents in an empathetic and understanding way may help the process go more smoothly and deepen the relationship between them and their children. Here are a few examples of conversation starters Millennials can use when talking to their Boomer parents about decluttering:

    Conversation Starter #1: "I know these things mean something to you. I’d love to hear the story behind a few of them."

    "This shifts the focus from getting rid of objects to honoring the meaning behind them," says Pinarli. "When a parent feels seen and understood, they’re often more open to eventually letting go. It validates that the attachment is about memory and identity, not just stuff."

    Conversation Starter #2: "What would feel good for you to keep, and what feels like it’s just taking up space now?"

    "This gives them agency," Pinarli explains. "Instead of telling them what to throw away, it invites them to reflect on what still feels meaningful versus what might no longer serve them. That sense of control reduces defensiveness."

    Conversation Starter #3: "Would it help to go through this together so we can make sure the important things are preserved?"

    "This frames decluttering as a collaborative and supportive process, not a demand," Pinarli shares. "It reassures them that their memories and legacy won’t be dismissed or erased, which can lower the emotional intensity around letting go."

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    Costco customers are overjoyed by news that the store's 'archaic' cake ordering system is finally modernizing

    "This is GREAT!"

    costco, costco cake, costco cakes, costco cake order, costco custom cake app
    Canva/Wikimedia

    Costco announces new app for custom cake orders.

    Loyal Costco fans are lauding their favorite big-box store for a long-awaited change to its custom cake ordering system. In a company memo, Costco announced that it will be launching an app for customers to order customized cakes at the touch of their fingers without having to enter a Costco store.

    "We've got ordering cakes and deli trays online coming," said Costco CEO Ron Vachris. "Many of the things that we've heard from our members that could be a little bit clunky are now moving to a digital state, and we're seeing great adoption right out of the chute."

    It's a massive change from the previous custom cake process. Costco lovers have long complained about the old-school ordering system that required customers to physically go to the store's bakery, where they would fill out a slip of paper with their order requests and simply drop it in the order box.

    @eatsbyrachel

    Anyone else feel like the @Costco Wholesale custom cake ordering system is a bit antiquated? 🤔 Regardless, their analog process somehow always works 💯 #costco #costcobakery #cake #customcake #costcodoesitagain #costcocake #costcofinds #costcodeals #costcofind #costcofinds #eatsbyrachel

    Costco's "1800s" custom cake ordering

    Back in 2023, writer Lucy Huber humorously poked fun at Costco's seemingly outdated custom cake ordering system that resonated with fellow Costco shoppers. And her words went viral:

    "Ordered a cake from Costco and their system is from the 1800s, you write what you want on a piece of paper & put it in a box then nobody follows up and you just show up and hope they made it? I tried to call to confirm & they were like 'if you put it in the box, it will be there'," she wrote.



    It was a system that also caused Costco members on Reddit a lot of anxiety.

    "We did our wedding cakes from Costco, talk about a nerve-racking experience hoping everything worked out," one wrote.

    Another shared, "Drop a paper in a hole and cross your fingers 🤣🤣."

    Costco customers have mixed feelings

    Many Costco customers and Redditors expressed their positive reactions to the updated ordering system news:

    "As someone who lives 1.5 hours away from three different Costcos I LOVE this. I'm rarely in the market for a custom cake, but when I am I'm not driving an hour and a half to fill out the request form in store."

    "This is GREAT! But will I also be able to order chocolate cake with white icing and vice-versa? Because currently I can’t do that at my Costco."

    "While the box system worked, it was archaic. With anything, the new system will take time to implement."

    "Jumping from the 19th century to the 21st century. Bravo Costco!"

    Others weren't as happy:

    "Kind of sad in a way. There are not too many interactions like this in the digital age."

    "But the Paper & Pencil worked."

    "Coming in 2027: I didn't get my cake at Costco because Amazon-East-1 is down :(."

    "I have ordered many cakes with this low tech. Never an issue."

    Costco bakery workers react

    Workers in Costco bakeries also chimed in, many with negative opinions:

    "As someone who works in the bakery this is going to be a disaster. Half the people don’t even know the name on the order or what the cake says when they come to pick up. Like 2 times a week we get someone trying to pick up at the wrong Costco."

    "As a bakery employee, this is going to be a nightmare. The whole point of keeping the order form in warehouse only was to not overwhelm our staff AND (this one being the real reason I was given), is it makes people come in and 'grab a few items while their there, and then again when they come pick up the cake.' I am not looking forward to this. People are going to order at the wrong Costco, not do it right and then get mad at us. I'm terrified of this change 🫣."

    "As someone who has worked in the bakery at Costco, the prevailing thought has been 'the system we have works fairly well, so they’re probably not gonna change it.' It’s the same reason that the major sales department still uses paper slips for computers. Well, except for the apple tables. Those have a little iPad kiosk that will print out your slip for you, but literally none of the members ever use it and instead ask us to do it for them."

    Popular

    Gen Xers share 17 nostalgic dishes they ate growing up—and still make for dinner

    From sloppy joes to pizza bread, these dishes still slap.

    gen x, generation x, gen x meal, gen x food, gen x family meals
    Image via Reddit

    A family enjoys dinner during the 1970s.

    Generation X (those born between 1965-1980) grew up eating classic Americana meals. During the 1970s, comfort meals like tuna casserole and salmon roquettes were popular meals.

    Gen X also grew up eating some pretty unhinged (but all the more yummy) sandwiches. These meals are steeped in childhood nostalgia.

    And to this day, Gen Xers are still fond of their favorite dishes they grew up eating. Together, they discussed on Reddit their most-loved home-cooked dishes that they still whip up, starting with sloppy joes.

    Here are 17 iconic Gen X comfort meals to keep in mind the next time you make dinner:


    @genx_shawn

    🤤😂 Top 10 Things ONLY GenX Knows the Taste Of... #genx #over50club #genxtiktok #over40 #genxcrew #generationx #genxers #genxtok #over40club #over50

    "Breakfast. We will have a 'breakfast for dinner' at least a couple times a month. Yum!" - fadeanddecayed, KddKc

    "Pizza bread! My mom would cut Italian bread into pieces, put butter and garlic salt on them, then pour some spaghetti sauce on them, cover with mozzarella cheese, and broil for like ten or fifteen minutes. Super easy and quick to make and so tasty. I'm sure my mom loved that I was so into something that took roughly zero effort for her to make." - hornybutired

    "Grilled cheese and soup." - reincarnateme

    "Meat loaf. I use 2 pounds ground beef, replace bread crumbs with minute rice, add 1 pkg beef soup flavoring, chop an entire onion for it, and mix BBQ sauce into mixture. Oh, important: do not overmix! Place all ingredients into bowl, then mix quickly 10 or 12 swirls of a large spoon. Grease loaf pan, carefully place mixture in, pat down & bake about an hour. (Extra info: for even better flavor, mix the night before, pat into loaf pan, cover with plastic, put into fridge overnight. Remove from fridge about an hour before baking. BE SURE TO REMOVE PLASTIC WRAP! [Esp. If in Pyrex glass loaf pan])" - jehardt, AbbyM1968

    "White guy tacos." - najing_ftw

    "Skillet dinner. Kielbasa, bell pepper, onion, spuds in a cast iron pan. One dish. Easy peasy." - UnimportantOutcome67

    - YouTube www.youtube.com

    "Chicken pot pie or chicken ala king." - sattersnaps

    "Fried catfish, greens, and red beans and rice." - User Unknown

    "Shepherds pie, technically cottage pie if it’s ground beef. Homemade enchiladas, usually made as a layered casserole instead because I don’t have time to roll them. Pork chops with mashed potatoes and veggies." - XerTrekker

    "Fried rice with chicken or pork leftovers." - AlternativeResort181

    "Hot hamburgers: hamburger patty open face on Texas toast thickness bread, cover with fries then cover that with brown gravy. Wife's variation is hamburger patty over rice with brown gravy." - EnricoMatassaEsq

    @past_archives

    American Gen X Foods That Kids Today Can’t Understand#nostalgia #childhoodmemories #backtochildhood #90s #2000s #usa #80s #90skids #80schildhood #capcutforus #capcut #capcutpioneer #America

    "Stuffed peppers. I make it much more easily by cooking it all in one large frying pan 'deconstructed'. Sauté onions garlic and ground beef, add cut up peppers, tomatoes or tomato sauce, sometimes a little spinach, then add separately cooked rice, salt and pepper and serve. It comes together pretty quickly and tastes just as good as stuffing and baking peppers in the oven." - Affectionate-Map2583

    "Macaroni and cheese with cut up hot dogs. Seriously, that’s what I ate tonight." - Dazzling-Walrus9673

    "Homemade Stroganoff casserole. Ridiculously easy to make. Ingredients:

    1.25-1.5 lbs. Ground Beef
    1 each of large white onion, green pepper, and red pepper
    1 can mushroom pieces, drained and rinsed
    12 oz. Bag of wide egg noodles
    1 can cream of mushroom soup
    16 oz. Sour cream
    Worcestershire Sauce
    Louisiana Hot Sauce
    White or Black Pepper
    Panko bread crumbs

    To Make: Preheat oven to 360 degrees. Worcestershire, hot sauce, garlic powder, and pepper are all to taste, depending on how much flavor and punch you want it to have. Cook noodles per instructions. Drain. Peel and slice onion (not diced), core and cut peppers into strips Brown meat, onions and peppers along with liberal amount of Worcestershire; garlic, pepper, and hot sauce. Add mushrooms. Cook until meat is fully brown, onions are translucent and peppers are tender. Drain. Combine drained meat, etc. with whole can of soup, half of the sour cream. Gradually add noodles into the mix. Add sour cream as needed to maintain consistency. Add Worcestershire, hot sauce, and pepper to taste. Dump into large, deep Corning dish or whatever. Cover too with bread crumbs. Cover and bake for forty minutes." - CynfullyDelicious

    This article originally appeared last year

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    People share the '10 second decisions' that meaningfully improved their lives forever

    Proof that our fate is made up of a series of tiny choices.

    reddit, ask reddit, decisions, decision making, gut instinct, intuition
    Image via Canva

    A woman at a fork in the road.

    The average adult makes upwards of 35,000 decisions a day. These can include the bigger, more existential questions that require reflection to weigh the pros and cons. But the vast majority of decisions seem insignificant: What will I wear today? Order takeout or make food at home? Podcast or playlist? Still, these fleeting impulse choices can play just as big a role in our lives as the more thought-out ones.

    Prime examples of this were recently made on Reddit, when people were asked to share a "decision you made in under 10 seconds that changed your life forever." These seemingly insignificant choices changed fates in profound ways.

    “Decided to go to Subway instead of Dairy Queen. They were across the street from each other and I was passing through town during lunchtime. Ended up hitting it off with the woman making my sandwich. Next week is our 11 year anniversary.”

    “My best friend said she wanted to move 2000+ miles across the country back to her home state and asked me if I wanted to come. I didn’t think, said ‘Yup, I’ll go.” We moved, less than a year afterwards I met my now wife. Couldn’t be happier.”

    “Said yes to adopting a stray dog that followed me home. 10-second 'sure why not' moment—now he's my best buddy for 8 years.”


    reddit, ask reddit, decisions, decision making, gut instinct, intuitionA van travels down the road. Photo credit: Canva


    Others were able to uncover new passions they never imagined.

    “I flipped a coin to decide if I was going to quit my job. Heads. I quit. A friend saw my lights on that night and stopped by to see what I was doing. I told him what happened, and he told me it was great timing. They let someone go at his job that day. He set me up with an interview for the next day, and I was hired. There were only three people who worked there. I eventually became the plant manager and have been working in management ever since!”

    “Saw a random advert advertising scuba diving certification. I signed up thinking ‘why not?’ I’m now an aspiring diving instructor!”

    “Early 20s and my sister asked me to drive her to the music shop to buy a guitar. I point one out and say ‘that black and gold one is gorgeous. Get that one.’ She tries it out and says ‘ehhh, I dunno if I really feel this one.’ I tell her that if she doesn't buy it, I will, and she says ‘you don't even play guitar! What are you gonna do with it?’ Walked out of the store with it on a complete whim, spent 3 months learning before I started doing open mics, making friends at the music shop, joining a band, and having the time of my life throughout my 20s.”

    reddit, ask reddit, decisions, decision making, gut instinct, intuitionA person plays the guitar. Photo credit: Canva
    For some, a 10-second decision ended up with an unexpected windfall.

    “Decided not to get into an elevator with my ex and her new boyfriend, so I took the stairs instead. On the third flight, I found a discarded scratch-off ticket that ended up being worth $50,000. It’s the only time in my life where being socially awkward actually paid off my mortgage.”

    “A family in my marina announced that they are moving away the following week. They were going to turn their sailboat over to a broker to sell it for them. I mentioned that I was contemplating a larger boat with a smaller engine and would be interested in theirs. I asked what price would they consider? He said, $10k. I said, okay, and we shook on it. The boat was worth over $24k. I got a wheelbarrow from the marina corral and removed stuff from my smaller boat, walked it over to their dock, and loaded it onboard. That was ten years ago, and I still live on it six months out of the year. Sweet.”

    Sometimes, these kinds of life-altering changes are simply fresh new outlooks on life.

    “I was going through old text messages with my then girlfriend and realized I had become a very negative person. I decided right there to always look for the bright side of things. It takes some effort but that was 12 years ago and I'm much happier. It becomes second nature after a while.”

    reddit, ask reddit, decisions, decision making, gut instinct, intuitionA man smiles. Photo credit: Canva
    In many instances, a 10-second decision prevented tragedy for themselves or others.

    “Most of these answers are super happy and mine really isn’t but fits the question. Mine would be double checking on my wife before bed. She suffers from PTSD, depression and anxiety and had just been ‘off’ all day. I checked with her a couple times and she said everything was alright each time. It might sound weird but she was too happy and calm but kind of sad at the same time. It just didn’t sit right with me. She said she was going to bed and we kissed and I asked again she chucked and said to stop worrying. She went upstairs and I waited a few seconds and went up to say I think something is wrong. I stopped her from committing suicide that night. Normally I would take her for her word but that decision was 12 years ago and we are having the best version of our lives because I listened to my gut and went and checked.”

    “One night I drove home from working evening shift (like 2 miles) and when I glanced in the rear view I had chills when I saw the headlights behind me at a red light. I got to my house and was about to park but then heard a voice in my head tell me to keep driving, so I did… and they continued to follow me. Called my dad to stay on the phone as I drove to a police station. Car stopped following when a cop car pulled up behind us (coincidentally). Next morning read about an armed carjacking in the area about an hour later.”

    “In middle school my best friend invited me to Knott's Berry Farm with another group of kids he was friends with…I got to my friend’s house after running some errands with my mom. There were 5 kids aged 14-15 there. I asked my friend how we were getting [to Knott's Berry] and he said he was driving his dad’s car (he was underage and had no license). I was nervous but I wanted to look cool so, I said ok. Right before we got into the car, I had the worst feeling come over me. In approximately 5 seconds, I felt a drop in my stomach to a bottomless pit, a hot flash followed by chills, and intense nausea. I literally left without making a sound, running to a nearby Starbucks and using a stranger's phone and asking my mother to pick me up. I felt so embarrassed. I knew I was going to get shit all month from my friend…A few hours later, they were on their way home on the freeway and lost control of the vehicle. All 5 died.”

    reddit, ask reddit, decisions, decision making, gut instinct, intuitionA damaged vehicle sits on the side of a road. Photo credit: Canva
    What about when you can't decide?

    And yet, for some (make that many) of us, knowing that every decision is uniquely important can be a major source of anxiety, causing us to freeze via “analysis paralysis” and not choose at all—which, in itself, is a choice (they’re inescapable!). In fact, our brains tend to struggle more with less risky decisions.

    Interestingly, experts seem to suggest combating this ambivalence with tools that force a quick deadline. You can either toss a coin or set a time limit, which would arguably incite one of these potentially life-changing 10-second decisions.

    Life will inevitably call on us to make both long, thought-out decisions and to go with our gut. But hopefully, this reminds us that even our whims can lead to something truly pivotal without making us lose our minds.

    Seniors ranting about their friend Barbara cheating at Mahjong is the Internet's best new reality show

    "The Barbara Chronicles are giving me life."

    mahjong, senior citizens, viral videos, funny videos, elderly
    Allison Novak/Instagram

    A woman named Debbie helps explain Mahjong-gate.

    If you've ever watched seniors play Mahjong, you know they're not messing around. Some might find it complicated. A player's guide explains, "Mahjong is a 4-person game of skill and chance that originated in China." It involves numbered tiles, winds, dragons, flowers, and jokers. It's serious business that, while fun and an excellent way to stretch the mind, can lead to actual fights.

    No fight has been more dramatic than what happened between Allison Novak (@allisonnovak) and her family. While visiting her parents in Florida (an escape from the cold Minnesota winter where they all usually reside), Novak, alongside her brother, sister, husband, and son, piled into the car en route to the airport. From there, we get the full rundown on "Mahjong-gate."


    @alllisonnovak

    My mom telling me about the mahjong drama at her retirement community. #mahjong #mahjongtable #drama #retirement #florida

    According to Allison's mother, Cynthia, a woman named Barbara allegedly cheats at this game—and the other players aren't having it. She shared, "We're done with her. We're not playing with a cheater anymore."

    Cynthia goes on to explain an "incident" regarding tapping tiles. "They tapped it. They put it down. And I said, 'Oh damn. I wanted that tile.' And Sharon goes, 'Just take it.' And Barbara said, 'No, I tapped it already.'"

    From there, it takes a dramatic turn: "Last night, Barbara did some stuff that was outright…I mean really bad." She explains another tapping incident before explaining the etiquette of Mahjong: "So when you Mahjong, meaning you won, you have to show all your tiles to prove it. Kinda like bingo. But she takes her tiles and flips them over so no one really knows what she really had."

    These videos have become a massive hit online. On TikTok alone, the first in the series was so popular it has nearly 5,000 comments.

    "Barbara is mentioned thousands of times in the Mahjong Files," jokes one TikToker, a comment itself garnering over 7,000 likes.

    "The secret lives of Mahjong Wives," another comments, putting a spin on the popular reality show The Secret Lives of Mormon Lives.

    The Mahjong saga was so popular it has now become a series, with each video clip more exciting and dramatic than the last. (Novak has put menacing music underneath the dialogue, adding to the already terrifying tension.)

    @alllisonnovak

    The Real Housewives of Mahjong Mannor update!!! 🚨🚨🚨 #mahjong #mahjongtable #drama #retirement #florida

    In Part Two of the series, Cynthia's friend Debbie (while chatting with their other friends Bud, Diane, and Ralph) says, "Oh, she looks like this innocent little lady. She goes to church. Like I told them, I don't go to Mahjong to see how well I can cheat. You want to play the game."

    She complains that Barbara never bothers to change her game up, which the others find frustrating. From there, the conversation goes left, escalating into a possible murder accusation. (They're joking, of course, but you'll have to watch the video to see for yourself.)

    Commenters from Instagram and Threads are also getting in on the fun by treating the saga like the soap opera/reality show it is. Many point out the pronunciation of Mahjong as "Mar-Jawn," which adds an extra element of delight.

    "The Barbara Chronicles are giving me life," reads one of the comments. Another points out how quickly it all escalated, saying, "The jump from cheating to murdering your own husband…LOVE IT."

    In Part Five, Allison summarizes the whole affair, which leads to Barbara’s banishment from the game. At one point, Barbara runs away, and they chase after her with a camera. We then see a black screen with a chyron reading, "As of this recording, Barbara has declined all interview requests. Sources close to Barbara declined to comment. Some questions remain unanswered."

    On Threads, one person noted that not everything is always as it seems. "This is one of those documentaries where Barb walks in for her talking head interview in the last ten minutes and blows it all up."

    @alllisonnovak

    And that’s Mahjong 🀄️ #finalscene #barbaramahjong #mahjong #mahjongdrama #secretlives

    Novak told Upworthy how it all began:

    "My brother, sister, and I (and my husband and son) visit them every year. My mom and dad picked us up from the airport and immediately started telling me about the drama regarding Barbara. I couldn't help but laugh, and I was like, 'I need to record this!'"

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