+
“A balm for the soul”
  review on Goodreads
GOOD PEOPLE Book
upworthy
Family

I got tested for HIV. Here are my 5 big takeaways.

HIV, testing, responsible, positive

**stock photo/could use pic of Robbie with permission**A positive takeaway from responsible action.

Hey, I'm Robbie. And I just got tested for HIV.

I'll be real with you: It'd been a minute since I got tested, which is admittedly embarrassing. I'm a gay man — which puts me at higher risk of infection — with ample access to testing centers in my area of Chicago. I don't have an excuse for putting it off. I need to be getting tested. And frequently!

So I did the damn thing.



I honestly don't know why I was avoiding it. Naiveté? Ignorance of what a positive result would mean for me? Legit laziness? A toxic blend of all three?

Probably. June 27, 2018, is National HIV Testing Day, though. And that kicked my butt into gear.

While my testing experience was surprisingly easy and pain-free, it also served as a slap in the face, a reminder of my own privileges and the barriers exposing those most vulnerable to an ongoing public health crisis that's not getting better.

National HIV Testing Day #HIVTestingDay

celebrating responsible, HIV, testing, government, awarenessNational HIV Testing Day #HIVTestingDay

www.hiv.gov

Here are five takeaways I had from the experience:

1. My test was wicked fast, free, and totally painless.

I went to the nearby Center on Halsted, which is a bustling queer oasis boasting colorful artwork, plush sofas, and an impressive array of programs and services for Chicago's LGBTQ community. I wish every queer in the world had access to it.

I had an appointment, but the center — which, like many similar facilities, offers free testing and doesn't require insurance — takes walk-ins too. I was instructed to head up to the second floor, find a seat on a white couch, and relax until they were ready to see me.

Then I met Melvin, a manager of HIV services at the center who'd be walking me through the testing process. He was a great resource to have.

He patiently answered all of my painfully basic questions about HIV and other STDs ("There's no such thing as a stupid question," he assured me), then filled me in on how testing worked, noting I'd have plenty of helpful, healthy options moving forward, should my result be positive.

Then bloop — I got a tiny prick on my fingertip. Melvin drew some blood and noted it takes just 21 minutes to get results. New rapid-testing technology means clients can be in and out in under an hour, easy, Melvin said. And at larger public testing events, like Pride festivals, the process can be accelerated even more.

While we waited, Melvin asked me a handful of questions so that if I were interested I'd know what kinds of programs I can benefit from at the center.

I learned a few fantastic things while we chatted, too, like:

2. You may be able to get tested along with a partner or a group of friends who also want to know their status.

This is cool! And I didn't know it was a thing!

While guidelines require that the disclosing of test results are done one-on-one, the process itself doesn't need to be a solo affair at the center, Melvin explained. If you want a significant other or your crew to come along for support and also get tested, that's totally fine.

3. PrEP is newly available for teens. And that's huge.

PrEP, or Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis, is a pill that, if taken daily, drastically reduces your risk of HIV infection. Anyone can go on PrEP, which has the brand name Truvada, but it's especially encouraged for those most at risk of infection.

I've been thinking about going on PrEP for awhile. And to be honest, there's no good reason I haven't.

"For most people, it's quite affordable," Melvin said, continuing on to say that health insurance will usually assist with co-pays, and — if you're not insured — there are many programs that can help. (Still, however, the pricing of PrEP has been a controversial barrier for many in the LGBTQ community who need it most.)

In May, the FDA announced that PrEP can now be prescribed to teens as well. And that's a big deal. "The sooner that medication is in that demographic pool of people, the better," Melvin explained.

Why that is, however, reflects a sobering reality about our war on HIV.

HIV is still a public health crisis among certain marginalized groups.

An intersection of racism and socioeconomic inequality means that younger boys and men of color and transgender women, have largely been left out of the progress we've experienced on HIV in the U.S.

If you're a black man who has sex with men, for instance, the CDC projects that you have a 50% chance of contracting HIV in your lifetime, if current rates hold steady.

Why isn't there more urgency to confront this epidemic?

"As the virus abated in the white population, it also dwindled in the public consciousness," Leah Green recently wrote for The Guardian. "Even charities set up to combat HIV and AIDS changed focus: Their attention turned to the equal marriage fight."

Melvin told me there are a variety of compounding factors that continue to put young men of color and trans women more at risk. These groups are more likely to lack affordable health insurance and face discrimination while receiving care, for example. Black and brown LGBTQ people are less likely to have access to affirmative services that can test for and treat HIV as well. And up until recently, most messaging encouraging queer people to get on PrEP targeted the white, gay, cisgender population.

These barriers need breaking.

5. Ignorance around HIV and how it's transmitted is still stigmatizing people who are HIV-positive.

No, you can't get HIV from sharing a glass of water with a positive person or being serviced by the same barber who cuts their hair. But Melvin continues to hear a lot of wild ideas like these floating around.

"There is still a lot of fear and stigma," he said. "Even among gay men."

The use of dating and hook-up apps haven't necessarily helped either. Many gay or bi men who are "undetectable," for instance, face discrimination from potential partners who don't realize that, although they are HIV-positive, they will not transfer the virus.

"If that person is forthright about being undetectable, they can still be stigmatized on apps or in the community for being honest," Melvin told me.

Detectable or not, however, HIV-positive people can certainly still be in loving, sexual relationships without passing the virus to their partners. It just takes treatment, commitment, and communication.

After 21 minutes had passed, and I'd asked Melvin enough questions to make his head spin, we got my results.

And now I feel so much better just knowing my status.

The worst part about the prospect of HIV/AIDS is living in the unknown. Don't avoid getting tested simply out of fear. Understanding your health and having a solid plan to stay on top of it — regardless if you're HIV-positive or negative — is the best way to live a long and healthy life.

What are you waiting for?

You can find free, fast, and confidential testing near you. Head over to the CDC website to learn more.


Yes, school lunches CAN be easy, healthy and inexpensive.

Parents, let’s face it: prepping school lunches can feel like trying to solve a complex math equation. It's got to be nutritious, appealing, fast, and let's not forget…within budget. But what if we told you there’s a secret weapon that can make this whole ordeal a breeze? Enter: O Organics from Albertsons.

O Organics offers a wide range of affordable, USDA organic goodies that are perfect for school lunches. From crunchy apple slices to delicious, creamy greek yogurt, they've got you covered. Plus, their prices won’t break the bank, proving that healthy eating doesn’t have to be a luxury.

Now, let’s get down to the good stuff: the food! Here are some simple, kid (and wallet) friendly lunch ideas—made entirely with O Organics ingredients—to help you ditch the processed junk and give your kids the fuel they need to conquer the classroom:

1. Pasta Salad

  • Main: A cold pasta salad made with O Organics whole-grain rotini pasta, O Organics chopped vegetables (like cucumbers, bell peppers, and cherry tomatoes), and Italian dressing. Add protein with chickpeas or a three bean blend.
  • Side: O Organics apple slices.
  • Snack: A serving of O Organics Greek yogurt, with some granola for a fun topping.

2. Egg Salad Sandwich

  • Main: A sandwich using whole wheat bread filled with a mixture of O Organics hard boiled eggs, mayo (or Greek yogurt for extra protein), mustard, dill, onion powder, salt and pepper.
  • Side:O Organics tortilla chips and salsa.
  • Snack: A pack of O Organics fruit strips.

3. Peanut Butter Apple Wrap (great for toddlers)

  • Main:O Organics peanut butter spread on a couple of flour soft taco tortillas, topped with thinly sliced apples. Drizzle some O Organics honey, roll it up and voila!
  • Side:O Organics baby-cut carrots with a side of hummus.
  • Snack:O Organics cottage cheese.

4. Quickie Quesadilla

  • Main: A tortilla filled with O Organics Mexican Style Shredded Cheese, black beans, and a sprinkle of chili powder.
  • Side: A couple of hard boiled O Organics eggs.
  • Snack: Ants on a log.

5. A Hot Dog…that stays hot

  • Main: You know the drill. Hot dog (we recommended the O Organics Beef Franks). Mustard. Cheese. Bun.
  • Side: A colorful side salad with spring mix, cherry tomatoes, and vinaigrette dressing.
  • Snack:O Organics banana chips.

But how the heck do you keep the hot dog hot? We’ve got just the tip, courtesy of Allrecipes.com:

Step 1

  • Preheat an insulated beverage container by filling it with boiling water. Let stand for 15 to 20 minutes. Right before leaving, dump out water and replace with more boiling water. The preheating keeps it hot for a longer time. Place the hot dog into the water and close the lid.

Step 2

  • When your child is ready for lunch, they can take the hot dog out of the container and place it on the bun.

Remember: This list is just a starting point. You can totally customize it to your kid’s needs and preferences. You can even involve your kiddos in the lunch-packing process to make it more fun for everyone. Let them help choose the menu, make a shopping list, pack their lunches…even grow their own veggies! If you’re feeling ambitious, that is.

No matter how you choose to give your kids the best possible start to their day, making small changes and taking advantage of resources like O Organics can help make it happen in a sustainable and enjoyable way.

So, what are you waiting for? Shop O Organics now exclusively at Albertsons, Safeway or any sister store. Your kids' bodies (and taste buds) will thank you.

@thedailytay/TikTok

"My anxiety could not have handled the 80s."

Raising kids is tough no matter what generation you fall into, but it’s hard to deny that there was something much simpler about the childrearing days of yesteryear, before the internet offered a million and one ways that parents could be—and probably are—doing it all very, very wrong.

Taylor Wolfe, a millennial mom, exemplifies this as she asks her own mother a series of rapid-fire questions about raising her during the 80s and the stark contrast in attitudes becomes blatantly apparent.

First off, Wolfe can’t comprehend how her mom survived without being able to Google everything. (Not even a parent, but I feel this.)


“What did we have to Google?” her mom asks while shaking her head incredulously.

“Everything! For starters, poop!” Wolfe says. “Cause you have to know if the color is an okay color, if it's healthy!”

“I was a nursing mom, so if the poop came out green, it was because I ate broccoli,” her mom responds.

…Okay, fair point. But what about handy gadgets like baby monitors? How did Wolfe’s mom keep her kid alive without one?

“I was the monitor, going in and feeling you,” she says.

@thedailytay My anxiety would have hated the 80s. Or maybe loved it? IDK! #fyp #millennialsontiktok #parenttok #momsoftiktok #comedyvid ♬ original sound - TaylorWolfe

Could it really be that easy? It was for Wolfe’s mom, apparently. Rather than relying on technology, she simply felt her child and adjusted accordingly.

“If you were hot, you slept in a diaper. If you were cold, you had a blanket around you.” Done and done.

Wolfe then got into more existential questions, asking her mom if she ever felt the stress of “only having 18 summers” with her child, and how to make the most of it.

Without missing a beat, Wolfe's mother says, “It's summer, I still have you.”

Going by Wolfe’s mom, the 80s seems like a time with much less pressure.

From feeding her kids McDonald’s fries guilt-free to being spared the judgment of internet trolls, she just sort of did the thing without worrying so much if she was doing it correctly.

That’s nearly impossible in today’s world, as many viewers commented.

“Google just gives us too much information and it scares us,” one person quipped.

Another seconded, “I swear social media has made me wayyyy more of an anxious mom."

Even a professional noted: “As someone who has worked in pediatrics since the 80s, the parents are way more anxious now.”

I don’t think anyone truly wants to go back in time, per se. But many of us are yearning to bring more of this bygone mindset into the modern day. And the big takeaway here: No matter how many improvements we make to life, if the cost is our mental state, then perhaps it’s time to swing the pendulum back a bit.


This article originally appeared on 8.24.23

@mandy_and_mason/TikTok

Thanks goodness they got to him in time.

On Sept 9th, 2023, Amanda Pidruchney and her husband Darren had arrived at a house to rescue six German shepherds from a seemingly responsible breeder who simply couldn’t continue her program after her husband passed away.

Amanda and Darren told “Newsweek” that their plans were to take the dogs and enter them into Schutzhund competitions, which are popular for the breed. Those plans however got quickly “derailed” when they arrived to find the dogs severely malnourished and in “horrific conditions.”

And it was the runt of the litter, named Dorel, that had the worst treatment of all.


"Dorel was chained up to one side of the house all by himself—no food, no water, filthy with an infected wound—completely unprotected from bears…in a bear-filled area…during bear season.

In essence, Dorel was “bear bait.

Even after being rescued and taken to a vet, Dorel’s plight was dire, since he was dealing with a ton of inconclusive, yet serious symptoms, including a dilated colon and inflamed lymph nodes.



But through Amanda and Darren’s tireless efforts, Dorel not only survived, but is now thriving.

Flash forward to a year later, and Amanda posts another video, where she writes a message in Dorel's POV to his former owner: "What you missed since leaving me chained up as bear bait."

In it we see the amazing dog life Dorel has now—one filled with Christmas light ride, frolicking through spacious backyards, enjoying “endless snuggles,” chomping on toys, going on walks—everything a dog wants and deserves.


Unsurprisingly, the clip quickly racked up millions of views, with a ton of comments showing support.

“Bear bait! Omg my heart broke into a million pieces. Thank you momma for saving him. He deserves the world,” person wrote.

Another echoed, “Australian here: ummm as bear bait is wild! Evil! Thank you for reducing and giving the life this beauty deserves.”

Still another said, “My stomach is turning and my eyes are filled with tears. Love him extra for me. Precious boy.”

Indeed, there are few cruelties as unfathomable as mistreating animals. Thank goodness Amanda and Darren were willing and able to turn Dorel and the other doggos’ lives around.

Darren and Amanda have since reported the breeder, and were able to help rescue the other dogs that were kept there (yes, there were more). Many of course are in dire need of help, particularly vet care, which is why the couple set up a GoFundMe page, which you can check out here.

You can also follow along on their whole adventure on TikTok.

The Glass Sniper is taking people back to 1998.

A popular TikToker known as The Glass Sniper is going viral with a video that struck a chord with people who remember the early days of the internet.

In the video, he teases a specific sound that was everywhere before it suddenly disappeared into the collective memory of those born before the Clinton-Lewinsky scandal hit the news.

“There is only one sound in this entire world that will forever separate the old generation from the new one,” Glass Sniper in the viral video. “'For when the new generation hears it, they'll have no idea what we're talking about. But when the old generation hears it… We cringe!”


The sound, of course, is the squeak of a dial-up modem connecting with an Internet service provider or ISP, as they were known back in the day.

New year. New Generation. What year is the line drawn? Lol

@theglasssniper

New year. New Generation. What year is the line drawn? Lol

One of the biggest problems with dial-up internet was that if you were online, no one in your home could use the phone, which caused some big domestic problems. Also, if you used a long-distance phone number for your dial-up number, you could be in for a hefty phone bill.

"I can hear my mom yelling 'IM ON THE PHONE!'" — MacksMom1990 wrote in the comments. "Followed by...You've got mail," DawnMichel added.

"I can already hear my sister yelling at me to get off the computer so she can call her friend," Uncle B wrote.

Although they’re uncommon, people still use dial-up modems in 2023. For some comparison, in 2002, 55 million people in the U.S. used dial-up internet but that number quickly dropped to 51 million in 2003. As of September 2023, 400,000 people in the U.S. still have dial-up internet.


This article originally appeared on 1.23.24

@thedorestantfamily/Instagram

He's a a master of the ol' bait and switch

No parent knows what they're going to get when they open up their kid’s school pictures. Even if they’ve practiced their smile a million times that morning, something could (and let’s face it, probably will) go awry.

But more often than not, these bouts of chaos make for a delightfully entertainment parenting monet.

Just take Vially Dorestant’s word for it.


In a clip posted to her Instagram, Dorestant is seen trying to prep her son Corey for his big picture day happening at preschool the following week.

“Are you gonna smile?” she prompts. Corey replies, “yes!” He even shows off an adorable grin.

Dorestant tries to confirm, “That’s how you’re gonna smile?” Corey, with the same smile, says “yes!”

Because of the magic rule of threes, mom really tries to clench the deal by asking a third time, saying “when they say ‘cheese’ what are you gonna do?”

Corey demonstrates an impressive “cheeeeeese” with a classic tooth-showing smile. So of course Dorestant can feel safe knowing that that’s exactly how he’s gonna do it for picture day.

Spoiler alert: that is NOT how he did it for picture day. But arguably…he did something way better.

Watch:

Um, okay. The pure, unadulterated swagger of this kid. Eyes squinted, one hand in his pocket, the other holding his chin, posed more like he’s coming out with a new hip-hop album than a school portrait. So cool, and so unexpected.

“Nothing could’ve prepared me for the ending 😂😂,” one viewer wrote

Another surmised that “Dad must have gave him a different prep talk 😂😂”

There are even more fun comments where that came from:

“Corey at home: 😁Corey at school: 😏”

“Let him cook”

“Lied straight to your face 🤣”

“These baddies at the playground need to know.”

“Definitely make this a poster size for his graduation party lol!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣”

“He made a business decision 😂”

“Hand in the pocket too, come on man, this the hardest elementary pic of the year 🔥🔥”

“🙌🏾 My boy understood the assignment! 😎🤣❤️🔥”

The greatest part of this story is that Dorestant mainly wanted to practice Corey’s smiling with nhim because she was concerned he would be shy on the day.

“He tends to get shy and freeze up around others,” she told Newsweek. “Since this was his first picture day at a new school, I wanted to ensure he felt comfortable and confident.”

But Corey’s amazing bait and switch became a heart warming lesson.

"As parents, we often feel the need to shield our kids and prepare them for the world, which can make us anxious about their readiness, but we need to trust in their abilities and give them the space to shine on their own.”

Indeed, kids can teach us things too.

Pop Culture

Ryan Reynolds filmed his colonoscopy after losing a bet—it turned out to be 'lifesaving'

If anyone can motivate people to get this medical procedure done, it's Reynolds.

Sometimes when you lose, you win.

Cancer is serious. Ryan Reynolds is not. Luckily his characteristic sense of humor—along with being true to his word—has helped shine a light on a sobering topic in a fun way.

After apparently losing a bet to friend and “Welcome to Wrexham” co-star Rob McElhenney of “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia,” Reynolds agreed to get a colonoscopy … while broadcasting it to the entire world, of course.

Reynolds is an actor famous for hilarious hijinks. From his intense fictional feud with Hugh Jackman to performing epic pranks on talk shows, he is often the best thing on the internet for a good laugh.

However, he is also not one to shy away from difficult conversations, particularly when it comes to health. So raising awareness about the importance of colonoscopies was, as he quipped, “enough motivation for me to let you in on a camera being shoved up my ass.”

Reynolds might have lost the bet, but his actions paid off. The procedure turned out to be lifesaving.


The video shows the “Free Guy” actor getting the news that an “extremely subtle” polyp was discovered and cut out. Reynolds had previously shown no symptoms.

“I’m not being dramatic,” his doctor told him. “This is exactly why you do this. You are interrupting the natural history of a disease, of something of a process that could have ended up developing into cancer and causing all sorts of problems. Instead, you are not only diagnosing the polyp, you are taking it out.”

Ever the expert marketer, Reynolds smoothly slid in a quick plug for his alcohol brand, joking that “I can’t believe you pumped all that Aviation Gin into my IV. I was out like a light” before thanking the doctor.

Reynolds got his colonoscopy at 45, which is the recommended age to begin routine screenings. Though it’s a preventable cancer, colorectal cancer is the third most common cause of cancer-related deaths for men and women combined, and it is predicted to be the top cancer killer for people under 50 by the year 2030.

Because of the inherent invasiveness of the procedure, many people feel uncomfortable even talking about colonoscopies, let alone getting one, despite early detection being so vital. But now, thanks to Reynolds hilariously riffing on his experience, the whole thing might not seem so daunting after all.

Thanks for the delightfully silly PSA, Ryan.


This article originally appeared on 9.16.22