Conan O’Brien laments the normalization of mass shootings in a somber monologue.
"How could there be a file of mass shooting remarks for a late night host?"
When Conan O'Brien walked into work the morning after the Las Vegas massacre, his head writer handed him a stack of papers. That act became the centerpiece of his monologue.
"He said, 'Here are the remarks you made after the Sandy Hook shooting and the Pulse night club attacks in Orlando. You might want to look at them to see what you might want to say tonight,'" O'Brien recounted of the conversation.
Mass shootings, the kind with the headline-grabbing intensity that compels even a late-night talk show host to address, have become so routine that O'Brien's staff actually had a file filled with his past responses to them. He was horrified.
"How could there be a file of mass shooting remarks for a late night host?" he asked, incredulously.
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When O'Brien first started in late night, it was "practically unheard of" for a host to have to address this type of event.
A bevy of data show all the ways mass shootings have gotten more deadly and more frequent over the past several decades in the U.S. Over that same span of time, interestingly, Pew Research found that support for gun ownership over gun control has risen.
"When did this become a ritual?" asks O'Brien.
[rebelmouse-image 19531363 dam="1" original_size="450x253" caption=""When I began in 1993, occasions like this were extremely rare."" expand=1]"When I began in 1993, occasions like this were extremely rare."
[rebelmouse-image 19531364 dam="1" original_size="450x253" caption=""We're all tired of hearing reporters, let alone comics, discuss mass carnage in the most affluent and influential country in the history of the world."" expand=1]"We're all tired of hearing reporters, let alone comics, discuss mass carnage in the most affluent and influential country in the history of the world."
O'Brien doesn't have the answers — and neither do members of Congress, apparently — but we cannot simply accept that this is just something that happens and will always happen.
Will strict gun control measures put an end to mass shootings? Maybe. Maybe not. That doesn't mean that we shouldn't at least try to take action to make accessing these types of weapons more difficult for people who wish to use them to commit acts of mass death and destruction.
[rebelmouse-image 19531365 dam="1" original_size="450x253" caption=""I don't think it should be so easy for one demented person to kill so many people so quickly."" expand=1]"I don't think it should be so easy for one demented person to kill so many people so quickly."
That shouldn't be so much to ask.
12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women
We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.
Men and the feels.
Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.
In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.
Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?
IS IT?
Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.
Encourage.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Sharing ideas.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."
Email requests.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
Idea sharing.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.
Sexism.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.
Mansplain.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.
Mistakes.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.
Promotions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.
Rude.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.
Interruptions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.
Collaboration.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.
Disagreements.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!
In conclusion...
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.
About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.
The comedic book cover.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.
This article was originally published on March 25, 2019.