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Prosperity

A woman flew to Nigeria to directly confront her internet scammer. And now, they're friends.

A woman flew to Nigeria to directly confront her internet scammer. And now, they're friends.
Maria Grette

The relationship that has developed between artist Maria Grette, originally from Sweden, and "Johnny," a former Nigerian scammer, has a very bizarre beginning. But, in the end, it's a heartwarming lesson about human potential.

Twelve years ago when Grette was 62, she was encouraged by her friends to start an online dating profile to get back into the swing of things after a divorce. "I received messages telling me that people had contacted me, but I never looked at them," she told the BBC.

Then one day she logged into the site and responded to an email from a man she refers to as "Johnny." "I still don't know why," she said. "It was like a sudden impulse happening before I could stop it."


He described himself as a 58-year-old from Holland, raised in South Carolina, currently working in England. His son was a student at Manchester University.

The two exchanged emails for a while and he eventually called her from a UK number. He had an accent that she couldn't place but didn't let it worry her.

After three months of communicating, he agreed to visit her in Sweden.

"I wanted to meet him because I liked him," she said. "He had a way and a sweetness I had never known in a man before. And he was innocent in a way that puzzled me." He told her that he would come to see her in Sweden after making a brief stop in Nigeria for a job interview with his son.

Johnny first called her from London's Heathrow airport. Then to let her know he had landed in Nigeria and met up with his son. The next time he contacted her, he claimed to be at Lagos hospital with his son who had been shot in the head during a mugging.

Johnny said that the hospital was requesting €1,000 for his son's treatment but he couldn't pay the bill because his bank had no locations in Africa. He asked Grette to wire him the money so that his son can receive treatment.

"I will never forget how I rushed to the Western Union office, trembling while I did the transfer," Grette said. "All I could think of was to get the two persons in Nigeria out of danger."

After the initial transfer, Johnny asked her for more money due to "complications" and demanding doctors. After sending €8,000 to Johnny, she began to believe that something was up. "I was angry, I sent some very angry emails when I realized something was wrong," she said according to The Mirror.

Three weeks later, something unbelievable happened. Johnny called her to confess that he was a 24-year-old Nigerian scammer. He had finished university two years before but couldn't find a job so he was forced into preying on people. "When he revealed everything to me I was past the point of shame. I felt so sorry for him," she said.

"He said he had never met anyone like me before, that he had been fighting his feelings for me for a long time," she said. "He said his scamming mates had warned him about falling in love with a 'client', that he had ignored them because he trusted me and did not want to lose contact with me."

"I wanted to meet him," she said. "I could not live with this relationship unless it was adjusted to reality in all senses."

In October of 2009, Grette traveled to Nigeria to meet Johnny. "When I saw him at the airport in Abuja, tears fell over his face, and I knew I had known him all my life," she said.

During their time in Nigeria, the two developed a strong friendship. After meeting some of her friends that were scammers she began to wonder how she could help get these men out of such dubious employment.

Two years later she began helping African artists visit Europe for exhibitions and workshops. She has also traveled to Uganda to give talks on art. She credits it all to meeting a very unique Nigerian scammer.

"Johnny has given me more than he took," she said, "Without him, I would not have met Africa."

Johnny has stopped working on scams and with the help of Grette, moved to America to get his education.

"He is very dear to me," she said. "He has asked me so many times to forgive him and I told him that the most important thing is to forgive himself."

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Three women, three MS journeys: How multiple sclerosis looks different for everyone

Gina, Nathalie and Helga share their reactions to being diagnosed with MS and how they stay informed and positive in the face of ever-changing symptoms.

Courtesy of Sanofi

Helga, Nathalie and Gina all have MS, and their experiences show how differently the disease can manifest.

True

It’s been 155 years since neurologist Jean-Martin Charcot gave the first lecture on a mysterious progressive illness he called “multiple sclerosis.” Since then, we’ve learned a lot. We know MS causes the immune system to attack healthy tissue, including damaging the brain and spinal cord. Resulting symptoms can be debilitating and include fatigue, blurred vision, memory problems and weakness. Huge advancements in our understanding of MS and its underlying causes, as well as treatment advances, have been made in the past few decades, but MS remains a complex and unpredictable reality for the 2.8 million+ people diagnosed around the world.

Ironically, the only real constant for people living with MS is change. There’s no set pattern or standard progression of the disease, so each person’s experience is unique. Some people with MS have mild symptoms that worsen slowly but sometimes improve, while others can have severe symptoms that drastically alter their daily lives.

All people with MS share some things in common, however, such as the need to stay informed on the ever-evolving research, find various lines of support and try to remain hopeful as they continue living with the disease.

To better understand what navigating life with MS really looks like, three women shared their MS stories with us. Their journeys demonstrate how MS can look different for different people and interestingly, how the language used to talk about the disease can greatly impact how people understand their realities.

woman with horse, woman riding horseGina loves riding her horse, Benita.Courtesy of Sanofi

Gina—Hamburg, Germany (diagnosed with relapsing multiple sclerosis in 2017)

When her youngest son was 4 months old, Gina started having problems with her eye. She’d soon learn she was experiencing optic neuritis—her first symptom of MS.

“Immediately after the diagnosis, I looked up facts on MS because I didn’t know anything about it,” Gina says. “And as soon as I knew what could really happen with this disease, I actually got scared.”

As her family’s primary income provider, she worried about how MS would impact her ability to work as a writer and editor. Her family was afraid she was going to end up in a wheelchair. However, for now, Gina’s MS is managed well enough that she still works full-time and is able to be active.

“When I tell somebody that I have MS, they often don't believe me the first time because I don't fulfill any stereotypes,” she says.

Overwhelmed by negative perspectives on living with MS, Gina sought support in the online MS community, which she found to be much more positive.

“I think it’s important to use as many positive words as you can when talking about MS.” It’s important to be realistic while also conveying hope, she says. “MS is an insidious disease that can cause many bad symptoms…that can be frightening, and you can't gloss over it, either.”

To give back to the online community that helped her so much, Gina started a blog to share her story and help others trying to learn about their diagnosis.

Though she deals with fatigue and cognitive dysfunction sometimes, Gina stays active swimming, biking, riding horses and playing with her sons, who are now 11 and 6.

Cognitive dysfunction is common in MS, with over half of people affected. It can impact memory, attention, planning, and word-finding. As with many aspects of MS, some people experience mild changes, while others face more challenges.

Gina says that while there’s still a lot of education about MS needed, she feels positive about the future of MS because there’s so much research being done.

woman in wheelchair holding medal, woman rowingNathalie is an award-winning rower with multiple international titles.Courtesy of Sanofi

Nathalie — Pennes Mirabeau, France (diagnosed with relapsing-remitting multiple sclerosis in 2002)

Nathalie was a teenager and a competitive athlete when she noticed her first symptoms of MS, but it would take four years of “limbo” before she was diagnosed.

“Ultimately, the diagnosis was more of a relief, than a shock,” she says. “Because when you have signs and you don’t know why, it’s worse than knowing, in the end, what you have.”

However, learning more about the disease—and the realities of disease progression—scared her.

“That glimpse of the future was direct and traumatic,” she says. Her neurologist explained that the disease evolves differently for everyone, and her situation might end up being serious or very mild. So, she decided to stop comparing herself to others with MS.

She said to herself, “We’ll see what happens, and you’ll manage it bit by bit.”

By 2005, Nathalie’s MS had progressed to the point of needing a wheelchair. However, that has not dampened her competitive spirit.

Nathalie began her international rowing career in 2009 and has won multiple world titles, including two Paralympic medals—silver in London and bronze in Tokyo. Now, at 42, she still trains 11 times a week. Fatigue can be a problem, and sometimes hard workouts leave her with muscle stiffness and shaking, but she credits her ongoing sports career for helping her feel in tune with her body’s signals.

“Over the years, I’ve learned to listen to my body, letting my body guide when I need to stop and take breaks,” she says.

Nathalie explains that she used to only look backwards because of the initial shock of her diagnosis. In time, she stopped thinking about what she couldn’t do anymore and focused on her future. She now lives in the following mindset: “Even when doors close, don’t miss out on those that open.” Instead of focusing on what she can’t do, she focuses on the opportunities she still has. Right now, this includes her training for the 2024 Paralympic Games in Paris, where she will compete for another rowing medal.

“I only go forward,” she says. “Well, I try, anyway…It’s easy to say, it’s not always easy to do. But that’s what I try to do.”

woman exiting water after swimming, woman with great daneHelga's Great Dane has become a helpful and beloved companion.Courtesy of Sanofi

Helga—Johannesburg, South Africa (diagnosed with relapsing multiple sclerosis in 2010)

When Helga first started having balance issues and numbness in her feet, she chalked it up to her training as a runner. But when the numbness moved to her face, she knew something was wrong. She never guessed it was MS.

“When I was diagnosed, I felt completely overwhelmed and clueless,” Helga says. “I felt that I had nowhere near enough information. I did not know anything about the disease…I had no idea that it was going to be a process of continually monitoring and adjusting your lifestyle.”

In the beginning, Helga’s symptoms developed slowly, and she didn’t appear ill to others. She was even able to run for a few years after her diagnosis, but she couldn’t do marathons anymore, and she began to fall frequently due to balance issues and right-foot dragging. Then her cognition issues became more problematic, especially in her job as a trainer in a printing company.

“My executive function, decision-making and short-term memory were affected to the point that I was eventually medically unfit for work,” she says. She stopped working in 2017.

However, she didn’t stop living life. Even though she could no longer run, she continued to swim competitively. She got a Great Dane puppy and trained him as a service dog to help her walk. She also serves as vice chair of the patient support organization Multiple Sclerosis South Africa, and she advises others who have been diagnosed to join a patient advocacy group as soon as possible to get reliable information and meet others with MS.

Helga says she is “hopeful” about the future of MS. “I must say that I am so grateful that we have all the new medications available, because my life would not be the same if it wasn't for that,” she adds.

Part of how she manages her MS is by looking at the positives.

“If I could tell the world one thing about MS, it would be that MS is an incurable disease of the nervous system, but it's also the greatest teacher of valuing your health, family, friends, and managing change in your life,” she says. “My life is diversified in a way that I never, ever thought it would, and MS has been honestly the greatest teacher.”

Each MS journey is unique – with each person impacted experiencing different struggles, successes, and feelings as they manage this unpredictable disease. But the common thread is clear – there is a critical need for information, support, and hope. We are proud to participate in World MS Day and share these incredible stories of living life while living with MS. To learn more about MS, go to https://www.sanofi.com/why-words-really-matter-when-it-comes-to-multiple-sclerosis.

MAT-GLB-2301642-v1.0-05/2023

This article was sponsored by Sanofi. Participants were compensated when applicable.

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