Kids really do say the darnedest things.
This article originally appeared on 01.31.22
Any parent knows that kids can be surprisingly astute little philosophers at the most unexpected times. One minute your child is throwing a tantrum because you sliced their sandwich wrong, and the next they are blowing you away with their deep preschool thoughts. It's enough to give you whiplash, but it's also one of the most fun things about being around kids. You never know what they're going to say and sometimes what they say is just awesome.
Case in point: This 5-year-old who gave his mom some sage advice about handling her nerves.
Twitter user @Eprecipice (StressieBessie) shared the story in a tweet thread. She wrote:
When talking about our agendas for the day, I told my 5yo I was a little nervous about a meeting I have today. He said, \u201cMama, I am nervous all the time. I know what to do.\u201d So friends, here is all the advice he could fit into the drive to school:— StressieBessie (@StressieBessie) 1643118594
1. “You gotta say your affirmations in your mouth and your heart. You say, ‘I am brave of this meeting!’ , ‘I am loved!’, ‘I smell good!’ And you can say five or three or ten until you know it.”
Okay, first of all, the fact that this kiddo knows what affirmations are is awesome. Some people have questioned whether this advice really came from a 5-year-old because of the vocabulary, but kids are sponges and affirmations aren't rocket science. It's become quite common for preschools and kindergartens to teach kids things like this, so it's not actually surprising to hear him talk about affirmations. It's just adorable to hear the ones he suggests.
2. \u201cYou gotta walk big. You gotta mean it. Like Dolly on a dinosaur. Because you got it.\u201d— StressieBessie (@StressieBessie) 1643118788
2. “You gotta walk big. You gotta mean it. Like Dolly on a dinosaur. Because you got it.”
Okay, so this actually is sound advice. Researcher Amy Cuddy gave a whole TED Talk about how our minds respond to our own body language, and how using confident body language can actually release chemicals in our brains that make us feel more powerful and self-assured. So "walk big" like you mean it is legit.
4. \u201cThink about the donuts of your day! Even if you cry a little, you can think about potato chips!\u201d— StressieBessie (@StressieBessie) 1643118922
3. "Never put a skunk on a bus."
No idea what this means, but it's definitely solid wisdom.
4. "Think about the donuts of your day! Even if you cry a little, you can think about potato chips!"
I'm genuinely not sure if this is referencing real donuts or not, which is part of what makes it delightful advice. Metaphorically, "the donuts of your day" could be the positive things that happened, and focusing on those instead of the negative is basic positive thinking. Then again, if you cry and think about potato chips, perhaps he's just referencing comfort with food. Either way, totally feeling it.
6. \u201cEven if it\u2019s a yucky day, you can get a hug.\u201d— StressieBessie (@StressieBessie) 1643119356
5. "You gotta take a deep breath and you gotta do it again."
Pretty much every therapist from every psychological school of thought will tell you that breathing exercises are one of the quickest ways to calm your body and mind. Simple, but seriously sound advice.
6. "Even if it's a yucky day, you can get a hug."
Even though that sounds like a pretty typical thought for a kid, it's also good well-being advice. According to The Conversation, the chemicals released when we hug can help us manage stress, reduce anxiety and manage our emotions.
Smart kid.
He added one more piece of advice for good measure as well for those of us who tend toward distraction.
Extra addition from this afternoon: \u201cDon\u2019t get distracted and your feet will stay on the sidewalk and not too full of snow.\u201d— StressieBessie (@StressieBessie) 1643147180
Like a little Confucius, this one.
Seriously, if you ever want to hear some of the most oddly profound things you'll ever hear in your life, spend some time interviewing a 4- or 5-year-old. They really do say the darnedest things. And if you're nervous about something, just keep telling yourself you're "brave of" it. If nothing else, it'll bring a smile to your face remembering this delightful thread.
A great story but seriously, do not try this at home.
Steve Irwin, "Crocodile Hunter" cut-out
When a headline mentions anything about “wrestling gators,” you might expect it to be the shenanigans of a “Florida Man.” However, this gator story takes place further west in Missouri City, Texas … and it was indirectly brought to us by the late great “Crocodile Hunter” himself, Steve Irwin.
“What a morning,” Mike Trinh wrote on his Facebook post. Trinh had been preparing to take his youngest daughter to her first day in middle school when the girl ran to him yelling that an alligator was at the front door.
Thinking it a get-out-of-school ploy, Trinh didn’t take it seriously. That is, until he saw the creature himself.
Luckily, Trinh knew exactly what to do, thanks to a certain wildlife icon.
“All my years watching Steve Irwin, I figured I can deal with any wildlife as long as it ain’t a stingray,” Trinh wrote. He shared with ABC 13 that Irwin was one of his “heroes” and he'd been watching him since childhood.
Trinh might have used what he dubbed “Steve Irwin tactics” including covering the alligator's eyes and pinning its mouth closed, but he also added his own spin, using Brazilian jiujitsu.
“Once I got closer, I put my knee on it. In jiu-jitsu, it's called 'knee in belly.' I had a knee on it, spun to the back, sat on it, and then grabbed the mouth,” Trinh told ABC 13.
And as Trinh learned from Irwin, “Once you grab the mouth, that's it. It's done.”
How does Trinh’s technique compare with Irwin’s? Judging by this video below, not bad.
Here we see Irwin making sure the the crocodile’s eyes and mouth are incapacitated, and making sure to stay on top of it. Although that second part wasn’t so easy—two other full grown men had to come in and assist.
Of course, the obvious caveat in all of this is Irwin was a trained professional and had been catching crocs since the ripe old age of 9. The man had successfully rescued hundreds of them, according to the Irwin family’s official website.
Plus, the Crocodile Hunter had the utmost respect and reverence for the creatures he worked with. Even in the above video, he put his own life on the line in an attempt to rescue wildlife.
Bottom line: Maybe don’t try this at home. Even if you’re the biggest Irwin fan of all time.
Still, it did make for a cool story. And it seems to have been a success. Trinh applied everything he learned from Irwin and even gave his daughter a lesson too, as she had to “tie up the mouth.” Seems like the kind of hands-on teaching style Irwin would be proud of.
Like many of “The Crocodile Hunter”’s famed catches, this Texas alligator got a happy ending, as Trinh was finally able to load him in a truck and relocate him to a nearby pond.
Sometimes you never know when the things you learn will come in handy. But when they do, it just might be a surprise that’ll make you say “Crikey!”
Here are 21 of the most powerful responses.
Millennials are now old enough to seriously reflect on life.
This article was first published on 4.20.22.
It seems like only yesterday a millennial was a college kid that baby boomers chided for being entitled and Gen Xers thought were way too sincere and needed to learn how to take a joke. Today, the oldest millennials, those born around 1980, have hit their 40s and have lived long enough to have some serious regrets.
They also have enough experience to take some pride in decisions that, in hindsight, were the right moves.
The good news is that at 40 there is still plenty of time to learn from our successes and failures to set ourselves up for a great second half of life. These lessons are also valuable to the Gen Zers coming up who can avoid the pitfalls of the older generation.
A Reddit user who has since deleted their profile asked millennials nearing 40 “what were your biggest mistakes at this point in life?” and they received more than 2,200 responses. The biggest regrets these millennials have are being flippant about their health and not saving enough money when they were younger.
They also realized that the carefree days of youth are fleeting and impossible to get back. So they should have spent less time working and more time enjoying themselves. Many also lamented that they should have taken their education more seriously in their 20s so they have more opportunities now.
The responses to this thread are bittersweet. It's tough hearing people come to grips with their regrets but the realizations are also opportunities to grow. Hopefully, some younger people will read this thread and take the advice to heart.
Here are 21 of the most powerful responses to the question: “Millennials of Reddit now nearing your 40s, what were your biggest mistakes at this point in life?”
"Not taking care of my hearing, not even 35 and going deaf." — Kusanagi8811
"Not getting healthy earlier." — zombiearchivist
"Staying too long at a job in my 20s, just because it was safe and easy. When I finally got the motivation to leave, ended up with an almost 50% pay boost." — Hrekires
"Thinking that I could and should put myself on the back burner for anything and anyone else." — lenalilly227
"Smoking and not dealing with my shit the right way." — Allenrw3
"Pining after the wrong person." — runikepisteme
"I turned 40 this year and just started liking who I am. Why the fuck did it take 40 years for self acceptance?" — guscallee
"Take care of your fucking back. Lift with your knees. Sure it's rad when you grab a fridge by yourself and lift it in the back of a moving truck unaided, but one day that shit is going to have consequences that won't just magically go away by resting and "taking it easy" for a week." — GuyTallman
"I wish I spent more time with my dad while I had the chance." — CharlieChooper
"I'm 37. I absolutely could have taken better care of my body, but I'm in relatively good health. I'm starting to realize how important it is to maintain my health. I do also think I drank far too much in my 20 and early 30's. I'm trying to rectify that now, but it's hard. So that I guess." — dartastic
"I'm not sure if people have experienced the same but when I entered my 30s I became convinced I was rapidly running out of time. Rather than using that as motivation I let it paralyze me with indecision because I "couldn't afford to make the wrong choice." Consequently, I'm now 39 and, though I've had great things happen in my 30s, I regret spending so much time worrying and so little time committing to a course of action." — tomwaste
"Work to live, don’t live to work. You have half your working life after you turn 40 but only 20-25 years to really live it up before the responsibilities become heavy and your joints start to ache. Live life. Really LIVE it. Experience as much you can. Every sensation, sight, sound, touch. Be open. Be brave. Live your first few decades in the fast lane. You have the rest of your life to take it easy, when you have no choice." — MrDundee666
"I should have paid more attention to my parents telling me to save money and less attention when they were teaching me about purity culture." — Arkie_MTB
"If I could tell my 18 year old self one thing, it would be to save 10% of every paycheck I ever got." — PutAForkInHim
"Thinking that I have time to do everything I want only to find myself loosing time, and the endless energy I used to have in order to purse them." — ezZiioFTW
"Not wearing sunscreen." — blueboxreddress
"Not recognizing the importance of work/life balance earlier in life. My late teens, all 20's, and early 30's were spent pulling 60-100+hr weeks because I thought it was what was required to succeed. How wrong I was. Others stabbed me in the back and reaped the reward.
1.) Putting work first for too long. Work is my #1 priority during work hours now. After quitting time, I don't think about it (much) anymore. I don't vent to my wife or friends about it anymore either.
2.) Investing more into fast cars than solid long-term investments. Sure, it was fun, but I could have made bookoos more had I put that towards less-fun investments.
3.) Not using PTO and just waiting for the payout. All those years, missed. I'm in my mid 30's and I didn't actually have a real vacation until 3 years ago.
4.) Not realizing that "the good guy" often loses. Just because you're morally justified doesn't mean you're going to win. Just because there's a number to call doesn't mean anyone will actually help you. Just because "law" exists, doesn't mean people follow it, enforce it, or create justice. The world is dog eat dog and cynicism can be healthy in moderate doses." — [Deleted]
"When you get out of college, keep your friends. No matter how hard it is. Hold on to them." — mpssss22
"I imagine these are kinda universal:
"Always ask for more pay. Starting, yearly, before leaving, whatever. Get that money." — SensibleReply
"Spending too much time in front of a screen and not enough enjoying life." — BellaPadella
