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Quick thinking waitress worried that a boy was being abused, so she flashed him a secret note

It took her multiple attempts to get through to the frightened boy.

heroes, heroism, everyday hero, bravery, child abuse, kids, parenting, crime, police, heartwarming, rescue
via WFTV
Quick thinking waitress had a gut feeling a boy was being abused. So she gave him a sign.

Everyday acts of heroism and bravery aren't always easy. They take quick-thinking, an ability to assess a dangerous situation, and courage to act on a gut instinct that might be wrong; or worse, might put you in danger. And then of course there's the bystander effect, a theory in social psychology wherein individuals tell themselves that someone else will help, someone more qualified and prepared to handle this situation will step in.

To overcome our human nature, nerves, self-preservation, and psychology in order to step in to help is truly a remarkable feat. And yet it happens every day, and never fails to inspire us when such stories make headlines.

Server Flavaine Carvalho was waiting on her last table of the night at Mrs. Potatohead's, a family restaurant in Orlando, Florida when she noticed something peculiar.

The parents of an 11-year-old boy were ordering food but told her that the child would be having his dinner later that night at home. She glanced at the boy who was wearing a hoodie, glasses, and a face mask and noticed a scratch between his eyes.

A closer look revealed a bruise on his temple.

So Carvalho walked away from the table and wrote a note that said, "Do you need help?" and showed it to the boy from an angle where his parents couldn't see.

heroes, heroism, everyday hero, bravery, child abuse, kids, parenting, crime, police, heartwarming, rescueMrs. Potatohead's restaurant in Orlando, Florida. The child was sitting at a table like these when Carvalho noticed him.Facebook

The boy shook his head, no. But the waitress didn't give up, her gut was telling her something wasn't right. "I knew it that he was afraid," she said.

Her instincts were on the right track. Unexplained injuries on a child, and a parents' attempt at hiding or disguising them, are a big red flag for child abuse.

Carvalho made two more attempts until the boy nodded yes.

The server then called the owner of the restaurant to let her know that she was going to call the police on the boy's parents. It was a bold move with very little information to go on, but one that Carvalho knew was right in her heart. She knew she wouldn't be able to live with herself if she didn't speak up in that moment.

The police arrived and arrested the boy's stepfather on one count of third-degree child abuse. His mother Kristen Swann was arrested with two counts of child neglect.

A four-year-old girl was later taken from the family by authorities. They say she showed no signs of abuse.

Detectives spoke with the boy and learned his parents frequently withheld food from him as a form of punishment. He was 20 pounds underweight. After searching his body, they discovered that he was nearly covered in bruises.

His father had recently beat him with a broomstick and back scratcher. The man, Timothy Lee Wilson, received a life sentence in 2022. The boy's mother was also convicted on her charges of child neglect.

heroes, heroism, everyday hero, bravery, child abuse, kids, parenting, crime, police, heartwarming, rescueThe parents were taken into custody thanks to the waitress' heroic actions via Orlando PD

The boy told detectives that he was once hung upside down from his ankles in a door frame by his father and had been restrained by being strapped to a furniture dolly.

"To be honest what this child had gone through was torture," Detective Erin Lawler said. "There was no justification for it in any realm of the world. I'm a mother and seeing what that 11-year-old had to go through, it shocks your soul."

Carvalho's quick thinking and bravery may have saved the lives of two children.

"This could have been a homicide situation if she had not have intervened," Orlando Police Chief Orlando Rolon said.

"The lesson here for all of us is to recognize when we see something that isn't right to act on it… This saved the life of a child," he added.

The restaurant's owner, Rafaela Cabede, hopes that Carvalho's bravery inspires others to look out for signs of abuse as well. It's so difficult and important for adults to understand the warning signs for child abuse, as it's often difficult or impossible for children to speak up for themselves in these situations.

heroes, heroism, everyday hero, bravery, child abuse, kids, parenting, crime, police, heartwarming, rescueIt's not always obvious when kids need help, so we have to look carefully. Photo by Luke Pennystan on Unsplash

Visible bruises, withdrawn behavior, and limited contact with the outside world are key warning signals. With about one in seven U.S. children tragically suffering some form of abuse, all adults need to be on the lookout for the signs.

"We understand that this has to encourage other people that when you see something, say something," Cabede said. "We know when we see a situation that is wrong, we know what's the right thing to do. We know that speaking up is the right thing to do. But it takes more than acknowledging it. It takes courage.

This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.

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All In
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5 ways people are going "All In" this week

From the silly to the sentimental, there are so many ways people like to go “all in” on something. Here are our five favorite examples this week.

5 ways people are going "All In" this week
5 ways people are going "All In" this week
5 ways people are going "All In" this week
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When you hear the words “all in,” what do you think? You might think of getting groovy at a nursing home, a french bulldog having a total breakdown in the drive-thru, or maybe even a snack bar company promoting self care. Whatever you picture, the idea is the same: Going “all in” means doing something with total commitment—literally giving it your “all” and going completely over the top. No second guessing, no holding back—just full-throttle enthusiasm with some creativity and flair thrown in. That’s how we get those viral internet moments we can’t stop watching.

This DWTS dance trend 

If you’ve been watching TV or on the internet this week, you might have seen the viral dance move Dylan Efron and Daniella Karagach performed while on Dancing With The Stars (DWTS) last week. The one particular move, where Dylan holds Daniella as she does a mid-air horizontal walk, is going viral with over 8k videos using the sound. Some of my personal favorites include a mom and her baby, two girls or a girl and her cat, proving this dance trend is truly for anyone to try.

All In on Fiber

Speaking of trends, there’s one that really is about going “all in”, it’s called #fibermaxxing. After years of protein being the biggest nutrition trend, it looks like fiber might be taking over. For good reason too, while protein can cause issues with digestion, fiber can lead to better digestion, blood sugar management, weight control and reduced disease risk. Our friends at All In made a video explaining the #fibermaxxing trend. Each All In bar has 6 to 7 grams of fiber , plus they are delicious. Don't take our word for it, though: Click here to try it yourself (for free).

This child's long hair

This creator went all in… on pranking the audience. I don’t want to give away the contents of this video, but let’s just say it’s creative- and it made me quite literally laugh out loud. There are a lot of "momfluencers" out there who make content that uses their children, and as relatable and heartfelt as it is, sometimes a little satire break is worth appreciating.

Two entrepreneurs getting down to business


Lots of people dabble in entrepreneurship. These two went "all in" on helping others learn it. After four years of interviews with CEOs , research, edits, and a Penguin Random House book deal (yes, seriously), their book, Down to Business, has made its way into classrooms and libraries around the world. Now they are teaching other kids that age is not a barrier to entry in entrepreneurship; the earlier you start, the further you can go—and an entrepreneurial mindset will serve you no matter what you do in life.

Bridesmaids who went all in

Last on our list; two bridesmaids who committed to the bit. These ladies went “all in” in their remake of the legendary scene from the movie “Bridesmaids”. If you haven’t seen the original movie, starring Kristen Wig and Maya Rudolph, this might be your sign.

In the viral TikTok this bride, Caroline, had no idea what was coming when she put on her favorite movie while getting ready for her big day. The fact that she wanted to watch her favorite show before her bridesmaids surprised her, makes this going “all in” surprise all the better.

Snag your free (!!) snack bar here while this deal lasts. Just pick up a bar at Sprouts and text a pic ofv your receipt to get it for free. Enoy!

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Beavers were brought to the desert to save a dying river. Six years later, here are the results.

Their engineering feats are pretty dam incredible.

beavers, beaver dam, animals, wildlife, ecosystem, nature, earth, sustainability, deserts, waterways, rivers, pollution, climate change
Canva Photos

Can outsider beavers save this dried up river?

It's not easy being a river in the desert under the best of circumstances. The ecosystem exists in a very delicate balance, allowing water sources to thrive in the harsh conditions. These water sources in otherwise extremely dry areas are vital to the survival of unique wildlife, agriculture, and even tourism as they provide fresh drinking water for the people who live nearby.

But man-made problems like climate change, over-farming, and pollution have made a tough job even tougher in some areas. Rivers in Utah and Colorado part of the Colorado River Basin have been barely surviving the extremely harsh drought season. When the riverbeds get too dry, fish and other aquatic creatures die off and the wildfire risk increases dramatically.

About six years ago, one team of researchers had a fascinating idea to restore the health of some of Utah's most vulnerable rivers: Bring in the beavers.

beavers, beaver dam, animals, wildlife, ecosystem, nature, earth, sustainability, deserts, waterways, rivers, pollution, climate change Beaver on riverbank. Canva Photos

In 2019, master's student Emma Doden and a team of researchers from Utah State University began a "translocation" project to bring displaced beavers to areas like Utah's Price River, in the hopes of bringing it back to life.

Why beavers? Well, it just makes dam sense! (Sorry.)

In all seriousness, beaver dams restrict the flow of water in some areas of a river, creating ponds and wetlands. In drought-stricken areas, fish and other wildlife can take refuge in the ponds while the rest of the river runs dry, thus riding out the danger until it rains again.

When beavers are present in a watershed, the benefits are unbelievable: Better water quality, healthier fish populations, better nutrient availability, and fewer or less severe wildfires.

It's why beavers have earned the title of "keystone species," or any animal that has a disproportionate impact on the ecosystem around them.

beaver, dam, dam building, nature, ecosystem Pbs Nature Swimming GIF by Nature on PBS Giphy

Doden and her team took beavers who were captured or removed from their original homes due to their being a "nuisance," interfering with infrastructure, or being endangered, and—after a short period of quarantine—were brought to the Price River.

Despite the research team's best efforts, not all the translocated beavers have survived or stayed put over the years. Some have trouble adapting to their new home and die off or are killed by predators, while others leave of their own accord.

But sine 2019, enough have stayed and built dams that the team is starting to see the results of the effort. In fact, beaver projects just like this one have been going on all over the state in recent years.

- YouTube youtu.be

The water levels in the river are now the healthiest they've been in years. The fish are thriving and Utah residents are overjoyed with the experiment's results.

According to an early 2025 column in The Salt Lake Tribune (i.e. six years after the beaver translocation began) the revitalization of the Price River has "helped save [our] Utah town."

"A tributary of the Colorado River, the Price River runs through downtown Helper," wrote column authors Lenise Peterman and Jordan Nielson. "On a warm day, you’re likely to find the river filled with tourists and locals kayaking, tubing and fishing along its shore. A decade ago, it was hard to imagine this scene—and the thriving recreation economy that comes with it—was possible."

Of course, it wasn't JUST the beavers. Other federal water cleanup investments helped remove debris, break down old and malfunctioning dams, and place tighter regulations on agriculture grazing in the area that depleted vital plant life.

But the experts know that the beavers, and their incredible engineering work, are the real MVPs.

beavers, beaver dam, animals, wildlife, ecosystem, nature, earth, sustainability, deserts, waterways, rivers, pollution, climate change An actual beaver dam on the now-thriving Price River Public Domain

In other drying, struggling rivers in the area, researchers are bringing in beavers and even creating manmade beaver dams. They're hoping that the critters will take over the job as the rivers get healthier.

Utah's San Rafael River, which is in bleak condition, is a prime candidate. In one area of the river, a natural flood inspired a host of beavers to return to the area and "riparian habitat along that stretch had increased by 230%, and it had the most diverse flow patterns of anywhere on the river," according to KUER.

It's hard to believe that beavers nearly went extinct during the heyday of the fur trapping industry, and continued to struggle as they were considered nuisances and pests. Now, they're getting the respect they deserve as engineer marvels, and their populations have rebounded due to better PR and conservation programs.

It's about dam time!

This article originally appeared in June.

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Parenting

Expert reveals 3 easy one-liners to remember next time your kid is being rude or talking back

It's hard to stay calm when we get upset. Having these short phrases memorized can help.

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via Hunter Johnson/Unsplash

Dr. Becky shares 3 simple phrases that stop rude kids in their tracks.

Every parent has to deal with a child who talks back and makes rude comments at one point or another. Even the best behaved kids will do it from time to time. It’s a normal part of growing up. But it’s a parent's job to stop it before it becomes an everyday behavior and an ingrained part of their personality.

Stopping rude behavior can be especially difficult for parents because it's easy to get upset and escalate the situation when their children talk back or act rudely.

The good news is that Dr. Becky is around to show us how to handle these situations like an adult. Dr. Becky Kennedy is a popular social media clinical psychologist who founded “Good Inside,” a program that helps support parents and children through every developmental phase. She's been called the "millennial parent whisperer," a fitting nickname she earned for her spot-on advice.

Dr. Becky recently shared 3 lines parents can use to respond to rudeness and talking back.

“These will help you de-escalate the situation and immediately set you on the path for a positive interaction with your kid,” she says at the start of her video.

Line 1: “I hear you, and you must be really upset to say something like that to me.”

Line 2: “Look, all I’m saying is I know you’re a good kid, even when you say some not so good things.”

Line 3: “I know there’s another way you can say that to me. Do you want to try again?”

At first, a lot of folks may think that Dr. Becky is asking us to be too permissive of a kid who mouths off. But she has another perspective. “Now, I know what you might be thinking: ‘Am I just kind of permitting this rudeness?'” she says. “No! You are acting like an adult.” She says the key is avoiding being pulled into a power struggle or escalation of rudeness.

“You are not being pulled into a power struggle or rudeness escalation. Yes, it might feel good in the moment to say something like, ‘You can’t talk to me like that, you’re so disrespectful, no iPad tonight!’ But we know if we give rudeness back to our kid, they are just going to give more rudeness back to us. That is so ineffective and we have to be the adult. So try one of those lines and let me know how it goes,” Dr. Becky said.

The key question for parents to consider in this situation is: Am I reacting or responding to my child’s behavior?

Dr. Becky believes we should respond to the situation calmly and redirect the child’s behavior. Of course, it's easier said than done. That's why it helps to have easy one-liners like these, or short scripts, in your back pocket to lean on when your own emotions are running a little hot.

kids, parenting, motherhood, fatherhood, family, rude kids, child behavior, parenting tips As hard as it is, we have to stay calmer than our kids. Photo by Andre Taissin on Unsplash

The post racked up tens of thousands of views and likes on social media.

"That’s so important, to not respond the same way they are acting. And that’s where our power lies! To show them that is possible to deal with conflict in a different way!" one commenter wrote.

One commenter put Dr. Becky’s advice into action and had a great result.

“This absolutely works! My son said something awful to me the other morning while getting ready for school. I thought of you , took a deep breath, and said, ‘Wow, you must be really upset to have said that to me’ and he just nodded and said, ‘I am.’ We hugged, he even apologized and we connected,” A commenter wrote.

A fellow therapist, Dr. Claudia Luiz, explained the psychological concept behind Dr. Becky’s advice a bit further.

“This is what psychoanalysis calls ‘fusion.’ When the bad is fused with good, it neutralizes toxic interactions. Fusion is hard to achieve. Negative feels eclipse the living, positive ones, leading to ‘rudeness.’ To get more ‘fused’ you start by processing your impatience with your own negative feelings. You can learn to appreciate why it’s hard to dislike and feel angry at your children with fusion to feel less intense or disregulated. With fusion, you can be more chill,” Dr. Luiz wrote.

Dr. Becky’s advice is valuable because most parents would have a knee-jerk reaction to their child being rude and attempt to punish them or correct them in a harsh manner. However, Dr. Becky says that it’s best to diffuse the situation instead and that will make it less likely for the child to be rude because they aren’t getting the response they want. But what they are getting is something more, a chance to connect with a parent and an open, safe space to share their feelings without having to mask them in hostility.

Similarly, Dr. Becky has advised parents that a little bit of defiance in kids is actually a good thing. It's important for them to learn to trust their own voice and feelings — when communicated properly. Squashing their rudeness doesn't and shouldn't mean dampening their feisty inner spirit.

Raising emotionally resilient kids isn't always the easiest thing, but it's so important for living a healthy adulthood. And often, as Dr. Becky's tips illustrate, a lot of it comes down with being able to "tolerate distress" ourselves as parents. Find even more expert-backed suggestions on how to do that by following Dr. Becky on Instagram.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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10-year-old girl walks into police station and brings officers to tears with 2 simple words

She's been handing out handwritten cards to officers all over the country ever since.

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Photo credit: Canva

A 10-year-old has been handing out Thank You cards to police officers across the country for years.

10-year-old Savannah Solis knew she had to do something. Per KHOUN, the girl from Tyler, Texas had heard the tragic news that two local police officers in New York had been murdered. The news, all the way back in 2015, brought her to tears.

Solis knew that, as a kid, there wasn't much she could do, to stop the bad guys, to make the world safer. But she dreamed of one day being a police officer herself and being able to help. As a 5-year-old, Solis says her mother had a heart attack and the first person to arrive and offer help was a police officer. She never forgot that officer's kindness and bravery.

Savannah’s mom, Debbie, recalled the immense love and support the girl had for police officers all over the world. Inspired and mesmerized by their line of duty, she hoped and wished only the best for each of them. “We would drive by and see them stopping somebody and in the backseat she would pray, asking God to take care of them,” the mom recounted.

In the meantime, she wanted the heroes in her own community to know that she cared. So she decided to write personal letters. Hundreds of them.

police, cops, police officers, law enforcement, heroes, 10-year-old, thank you letters, kindness a piece of paper with a heart drawn on it Photo by Immo Wegmann on Unsplash

Her letters had two words recurring each time, “Thank you.”

Furthermore, the girl explained as best as she could what their service meant to her and how grateful she was to them for saving lives.

During her Christmas break, the girl went all out making these letters and posting them—she even delivered a few personally to police departments all over Texas.

“You are my heroes. I want to say don’t stop, please don’t give up. Many do not care or appreciate the sacrifices you make every day. But I do,” the girl remarked. Savannah added a note of inspiration which read, “Many are standing with me today to let you know that you matter. Officers across Texas, you matter to me. Officers in New York City, you matter to me. Officers all across America, you matter to me. Please keep taking care of us.”

One of Solis' deliveries was caught on video, per KXAN, where officers were moved to tears by her gesture.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

She went about taking autographs of as many officers as she could. Debbie noted that her daughter didn’t want celebrity or artist autographs but those of the cops. All the officers are seen shaking hands and getting teary-eyed as they read the cards colored and highlighted with the title, “My hero.”

Austin Police Department Assistant Chief Jessica Robledo felt proud of the girl’s gesture and of the fact that their role was so valued in someone’s eyes.

“The words she spoke from her heart touched every single officer. I noticed everyone was trying to blink back tears. That’s what it’s all about. She is an old soul. She knows the right thing to say and I don’t think she even realizes the impact of her words on these officers and this department,” she remarked.

That was 10 years ago. As Solis grew up, she continued her personal outreach to police officers all over the country, letting them know that their bravery was appreciated.

She visited a precinct in Manchester, New Hampshire as recently in 2021 where she brought cards to the officers, met the K9 dogs, and was introduced to the police horses as well. Commenters were blown away that Solis was continuing the gesture after so many years.

"Savanna. Officers need that inspiration with everything going on today. You're remarkable for doing this."

"Amazing young lady right, thank you Savannah I appreciate all your efforts to show your appreciation for our men, woman, dogs and horses in blue"

"What an amazing young woman thank you for sharing this post and thank you for your service to our city. And all the law enforcement officers all over the Country."

Bravo, Savannah!

This article originally appeared in July. It has been updated.

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Mom left phone with 6-year-old. Amazon showed up with a mountain of boxes the next day

This is the modern day equivalent of leaving a kid alone in a toy store.

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(Cover Image Source: YouTube|CBS Philadelphia)

Six-year-old Katelyn Lunt standing next to Amazon delivery boxes

Kids are becoming fluent in technology at astonishingly young ages. A 2024 Common Sense Media report found that children under 8 now spend an average of 2 hours and 52 minutes a day on screens (much of it unsupervised). And as any parent knows, that combination of curiosity, confidence, and easy-to-navigate apps can lead to some very unexpected outcomes.

In fact, accidental kid-driven online purchases have been steadily rising for years, with Amazon and other platforms reporting thousands of refund requests each month from parents whose little ones mastered “Buy Now” faster than the alphabet.

That’s exactly what happened to 6-year-old Katelyn Lunt, who caused a whole lot of chaos after her online shopping spree, as per ABC News. In 2018, the first-grader from Utah used her mother's Amazon account to buy herself $350 worth of toys and video games.

funny news, kids, amazon, shopping, parenting, news, local news, shopping for kids, boundaries Barbie can't watch. media0.giphy.com

According to Good Morning America, Lunt's mother Catherine was stunned to see Amazon delivery trucks pulling up in front of their home.

"Our family came home and the truck pulls up and all of these boxes are being pulled out of the truck," Catherine, who had no idea about Lunt's online splurge, told the news outlet.

Earlier that week, Catherine had told Lunt she could order one Barbie doll as a prize for doing extra chores at home. But the little girl had something else in mind. Instead of stopping at one toy, she added pages upon pages of items to the online shopping cart.

While her mom was tracking unrelated orders on the Amazon app, she suddenly noticed the avalanche of extra toys Lunt had slyly purchased. Catherine tried to cancel everything, but it was too late. The boxes were already on their way.

"They just started unloading box after box after box," Lunt's older cousin, Ria Diyaolu, recalled to BuzzFeed News. "Her mom went on her Amazon account and saw three pages of things she had ordered. She knew exactly what she was doing when she did it. I was so surprised that a 6-year-old knew how to do one-click, next-day shipping. She did not get grounded but she does not have access to the internet for a month."

Catherine learned the hard way that leaving her phone unattended with her daughter was a huge mistake. But instead of simply punishing Lunt, she decided to turn the mishap into a teachable moment.

Rather than keeping all the toys, the Lunt family chose to donate them to kids at Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake City, Utah. CBS Philadelphia's official YouTube page shared photos and footage of Lunt and her mother delivering the toys—transforming an honest mistake into an act of generosity.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Catherine later admitted that she should have been far more vigilant about handing over her phone without any restrictions, and she hopes other parents learn from her experience. With so many children navigating devices at earlier ages than ever before, she wants families to know about the security controls available on phones and shopping apps, so they don’t end up in the same situation.

Sure, Katelyn lost her internet privileges for a month, but she also gained something better: the chance to brighten the day of kids who needed it most. And Catherine gained a valuable reminder that in the age of one-click shopping, even a six-year-old can accidentally become a VIP Amazon customer.

Sometimes the best lessons happen when things don’t go as planned.

This article originally appeared 4 months ago.

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Wellness expert explains simple acts of self-care anyone can do without spending a dollar

Expensive facials and massages are great, but they're not self-care.

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Self-care is not what we've be taught one therapist explains

Let's talk about it: Self-care. It's something that has been co-opted by wellness influencers and gurus that somehow (and all-too-often) involves spending money on something luxurious. Self-care is often branded as things like pedicures, vacations, and hour-long massages at the spa, but according to Dr. Raquel Martin, we've been doing self-care all wrong.

In July 2024, Martin—a licensed psychologist—uploaded a video to her Instagram explaining what self-care is truly supposed to be. Spoiler alert? It's not meant to be indulgent. At least, indulgence shouldn't be an all-the-time expectation of self-care. Martin acknowledges that the wellness industry has monetized and conflated self-care with self-indulgence, and she explains that having self-care propped up as something that is indulgent isolates people who cannot afford those types of activities.

The psychological toll for conflating self-care with self-indulgence can get dangerously high. In the 2020 Psychology Today article, "Why Does Self-Care Sometimes Feel So Hard?", author and licensed psychologist Alicia H. Clark Psy.D notes that "indulgence stops being self-care when you feel guilty or unhappy with yourself, and this threshold is different for everyone." She goes on to say that "one person's self-caring indulgence can be another's gateway to self-harm, depending on your relationship with the activity, your capacity for moderation, and the reality of its consequences." This makes wellness influencers who tout a heavily indulgent, "treat yo' self" ideology of self-care all the more dangerous. Self-care is not one size fits all, and for those who struggle with self-discipline and moderation, the mindset can do more harm than good.

self-care, indulgence, moderation, treats, discipline Parks And Recreation Treat Yo Self GIF Giphy

So, what is self-care actually? How is it achieved? And is it always supposed to feel good? Dr. Martin goes on to share how she practices self-care, and what she lays out was surprising her viewers. According to Martin, "Self-care is not responding to every call and, if I do not have the bandwidth to have the conversation, stating that I don't have the bandwidth to have the conversation." She also notes that she says "No" to things she doesn't want to do, sets a financial budget, and does not drink caffeine after 4 p.m.

These things might seem a little boring when compared to indulgent self-care, but one thing is clear: these self-care practices are actually good for Martin's body, health, and overall wellness.

Much of what Martin listed are things a lot of people don't consider as self-care, but in actuality, self-care is defined simply by taking care of one's self. This means practicing self-care is getting in a few minutes of exercise a day, drinking more water, or spending time with friends. You don't have to spend money to care for yourself.

yoga, exercise, movement, body, health, self-care A woman practices Yoga.Image via Canva.

Commenters were shocked and thankful for Martin's clarification on what self-care is actually supposed to be:

"Love this list!! As a massage therapist, I have to call out the misconception that massage is indulgent. I'm always telling my patients that self care is more than a bath. I will be sharing this list with my patients. I'm also trying to make massage more accessible," one person writes.

"Thank you for this post. I’m internalizing your advice to see how I can apply. You resonated with my thoughts on so many levels. However, you also provided some clarity and food for thought/fuel for action," another says.

"I really appreciate what you said about pallet cleansers! Sometimes I get frustrated with myself because I'm not able to read and consume and learn about all the issues different people are facing. It's really important to me to learn about those things, not just for awareness, but also so I can do something about it. But self care is so important throughout that, like leaving my phone in the other room, or watching my comfort shows like you said. I often read kids books or TV because of how horrible the world is right now, and I need something extremely wholesome to balance it out. Also, workshop? I'm not sure what that means but I like learning from you. Thanks," another viewer shares.

So, maybe it's time to collectively ditch those indulgent expectations of self-care and really take a look at ways we can actually care for ourselves instead.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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