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Quick thinking waitress worried that a boy was being abused, so she flashed him a secret note

It took her multiple attempts to get through to the frightened boy.

heroes, heroism, everyday hero, bravery, child abuse, kids, parenting, crime, police, heartwarming, rescue
via WFTV
Quick thinking waitress had a gut feeling a boy was being abused. So she gave him a sign.

Everyday acts of heroism and bravery aren't always easy. They take quick-thinking, an ability to assess a dangerous situation, and courage to act on a gut instinct that might be wrong; or worse, might put you in danger. And then of course there's the bystander effect, a theory in social psychology wherein individuals tell themselves that someone else will help, someone more qualified and prepared to handle this situation will step in.

To overcome our human nature, nerves, self-preservation, and psychology in order to step in to help is truly a remarkable feat. And yet it happens every day, and never fails to inspire us when such stories make headlines.

Server Flavaine Carvalho was waiting on her last table of the night at Mrs. Potatohead's, a family restaurant in Orlando, Florida when she noticed something peculiar.

The parents of an 11-year-old boy were ordering food but told her that the child would be having his dinner later that night at home. She glanced at the boy who was wearing a hoodie, glasses, and a face mask and noticed a scratch between his eyes.

A closer look revealed a bruise on his temple.

So Carvalho walked away from the table and wrote a note that said, "Do you need help?" and showed it to the boy from an angle where his parents couldn't see.

heroes, heroism, everyday hero, bravery, child abuse, kids, parenting, crime, police, heartwarming, rescueMrs. Potatohead's restaurant in Orlando, Florida. The child was sitting at a table like these when Carvalho noticed him.Facebook

The boy shook his head, no. But the waitress didn't give up, her gut was telling her something wasn't right. "I knew it that he was afraid," she said.

Her instincts were on the right track. Unexplained injuries on a child, and a parents' attempt at hiding or disguising them, are a big red flag for child abuse.

Carvalho made two more attempts until the boy nodded yes.

The server then called the owner of the restaurant to let her know that she was going to call the police on the boy's parents. It was a bold move with very little information to go on, but one that Carvalho knew was right in her heart. She knew she wouldn't be able to live with herself if she didn't speak up in that moment.

The police arrived and arrested the boy's stepfather on one count of third-degree child abuse. His mother Kristen Swann was arrested with two counts of child neglect.

A four-year-old girl was later taken from the family by authorities. They say she showed no signs of abuse.

Detectives spoke with the boy and learned his parents frequently withheld food from him as a form of punishment. He was 20 pounds underweight. After searching his body, they discovered that he was nearly covered in bruises.

His father had recently beat him with a broomstick and back scratcher. The man, Timothy Lee Wilson, received a life sentence in 2022. The boy's mother was also convicted on her charges of child neglect.

heroes, heroism, everyday hero, bravery, child abuse, kids, parenting, crime, police, heartwarming, rescueThe parents were taken into custody thanks to the waitress' heroic actions via Orlando PD

The boy told detectives that he was once hung upside down from his ankles in a door frame by his father and had been restrained by being strapped to a furniture dolly.

"To be honest what this child had gone through was torture," Detective Erin Lawler said. "There was no justification for it in any realm of the world. I'm a mother and seeing what that 11-year-old had to go through, it shocks your soul."

Carvalho's quick thinking and bravery may have saved the lives of two children.

"This could have been a homicide situation if she had not have intervened," Orlando Police Chief Orlando Rolon said.

"The lesson here for all of us is to recognize when we see something that isn't right to act on it… This saved the life of a child," he added.

The restaurant's owner, Rafaela Cabede, hopes that Carvalho's bravery inspires others to look out for signs of abuse as well. It's so difficult and important for adults to understand the warning signs for child abuse, as it's often difficult or impossible for children to speak up for themselves in these situations.

heroes, heroism, everyday hero, bravery, child abuse, kids, parenting, crime, police, heartwarming, rescueIt's not always obvious when kids need help, so we have to look carefully. Photo by Luke Pennystan on Unsplash

Visible bruises, withdrawn behavior, and limited contact with the outside world are key warning signals. With about one in seven U.S. children tragically suffering some form of abuse, all adults need to be on the lookout for the signs.

"We understand that this has to encourage other people that when you see something, say something," Cabede said. "We know when we see a situation that is wrong, we know what's the right thing to do. We know that speaking up is the right thing to do. But it takes more than acknowledging it. It takes courage.

This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.

partnerships

5 ways people are going "all in" this week

From the silliest to the most sentimental, there are so many ways people are going “all in” on the internet this week. Here are our five favorites.

True

There's something truly special about watching someone go "all in." This could mean throwing an elaborately themed birthday party for a Chihuahua (see below) or something a little simpler, like surprising someone with a long-anticipated birthday present. Whatever it is, going "all in" means total commitment—no holding back, no second-guessing, just passion and full-throttle enthusiasm. It means being fully present in the moment and creating something truly special as a result.

In this roundup, we’ve scoured the internet for the best examples of people going all in—those moments where passion, creativity, and total commitment take center stage. Some are silly, some are sentimental, but all of them are a reminder that giving 100% is the only way to truly leave a mark on this world. Buckle up—these folks didn’t just show up, they went all in.

1. The guy who learned Mandarin to propose

@yinrun_hello He secretly learned Chinese to Propose 😭😭😭 #fiance #proposal #engagement #love ♬ pluto projector - ☆

Talk about commitment. Getting married is the ultimate example of being "all in," but this guy takes it to a whole other level. Shared to social media by content creator Yinrun Huang, the emotional video captures a marriage proposal that's completely in Mandarin from a non-native speaker. That's right—this guy learned a whole language (and executed it pretty well) to win his girlfriend's hand in marriage. Not only are the words beautiful, his dedication is, too.

2. Kid-approved snacks that help local communities  

It’s scientifically proven that kids are brutally honest, unfiltered, and don’t hold back—which is why our friends at All In couldn’t resist sitting down with this group and getting their honest opinion. Are these snack bars really that good?

The Bite Size Board has spoken—and they’re all in. Not only are these snack bars delicious, they’re also an easy way to help people in need: Every time you buy a bar, 2% goes to a community to help them get fresh food.

Want to try these Board-approved treats? Snag a free box by signing up with your phone number on Aisle. Then grab two boxes of All In bars at Sprouts, snap a picture of your receipt, and text it through Aisle. They’ll Venmo or PayPal you back for the cost of one box. Easy and delicious.

3. This Chihuahua’s extravagant birthday bash

@phoebeparsons__ Tell me you’re a DINK family without telling me #chihuahua #dink #mexican ♬ EVERLASTING LOVE - GROWS

Do you love your dog? Would you throw a birthday party for them? How about a full-out celebration in a Mexican restaurant that includes banners, party hats, and the entire restaurant serenading him? Yeah, we thought not. These pet owners are absolutely "all in" on this dog's birthday, and we love to see it. Not only is this celebration extravagant and clearly well thought-out, people in the comments section are jokingly pointing out that taking a Chihuahua to a Mexican restaurant is a nod to the dog's cultural heritage. If that was intentional, this might be the best dog birthday party we've ever seen.

4. Truly unhinged (and maybe true?) Taylor Swift theories

@grindcitymedia did taylor swift drop super bowl hints? 😲 #swifties #nfl #taylorswift ♬ original sound - grindcitymedia

OK, whether you love Taylor Swift or not, you have to admit that her fans (known as “Swifties”) have an incredible commitment to the fandom (and an eye for detail). Case in point: Last week on her boyfriend’s podcast, Taylor announced the upcoming release of her new album, The Life of a Showgirl. The news was responsible for breaking the internet, and also for spurring a ton of fan theories about the future album and her future performances. In case you didn’t know, Swift is famous for dropping “Easter eggs” that hint at things she’ll be doing in the future, such as when she kept flashing peace signs and dropping the number 2 in her instagram posts in the weeks leading up to her double album “The Tortured Poets Department” in April 2024. This time, Swifties have taken to social media to discuss potential Easter eggs that were hidden throughout her podcast appearance. The latest theory? Her constant references to sourdough bread were actually Easter eggs hinting at a 2027 Super Bowl Halftime performance. Only time will tell if that's accurate, but the enthusiasm, the attention to detail, and the hours of research that must have gone into all these fan theories is truly something to behold.

5. This dirt bike birthday surprise 

@dmndboys_

This is why I look forward to fatherhood 🔥

♬ original sound - dmndboys_

These parents didn't give their kid a birthday present—they gave him the best birthday present of all time. Not only did the setup require a lot of thought and planning, but check out this kid's reaction. You can tell this was something he'd been wanting for a long time. Going "all out" and getting such a great response in return—it's something amazing to see.


Snag your free (!!) snack bars here while this deal lasts.

@maplespetdinosaur/Instagram

The kids are alright!

The ‘90s/’00s music scene, especially genres like emo, pop-punk, and nu-metal, have been making a comeback—since the peak of COVID 19, really. Which makes a lot of sense. These styles originally emerged from a time of political and social upheaval as a way for young people to process what insanity was happening all around them and find a healthy way to let out their rage. This music still serves that purpose today, but with the added nostalgic effect of an “old-school” feel.

One teen band, called Maple’s Pet Dinosaur, has perfectly captured this gritty, retro vibe, not just in their now mega-viral song, “Lego,” but in the way they shot their music video…which just so happened to be filmed entirely on a neighbor's ring camera.

In the video, we see lead singer Maple Johns asking though the camera, “is it okay if we use your ring to make a music video, please?” to which the homeowner reluctantly replies, “Uh…yeah I guess…” (Is this part staged? Who knows? Who cares! It adds an awesome touch)

The band then immediately rocks out to a snippet from their song, which very much aligned with their ‘90s inspirations, which include Faith No More, Beastie Boys, and L7.

Watch:

Wasn’t that rad? Having it filmed via the ring cam gives such a fish-eye lens vibe, which all of us olds know is very apropos for the vibe they were going for. Many were even reminded of punk rock icons like Paramore and Avril Lavigne.

All in all, the video left viewers inspired for the future.

“Kids these days, you absolutely have to love their ingenuity. This generation rocks.”

“This gives me hope about the next generation of music. I legitimately enjoyed this song. And I can’t wait to see the whole video.”

'90s, band, music video, music, kids, pop punk Music video shot in fish-eye lens. media4.giphy.com

“Kids making garage bands a thing again is making this year a little better for me.”

In the comments section, the band shared that, like a lot of teens during lockdown, they began watching—and falling in love with— 90s/00s music videos, and were definitely trying to tap into that aesthetic for their own music. Mission accomplished.

'90s, gen alpha, kids, teens, cool, kids, alright The kids are all alright. media0.giphy.com

Pop-punk music has always been a distinct blend of catchy, dance-able (or at least headbang-able) beats paired with pretty emotionally raw lyrics depicting angst, heartbreak, and rebelling against the status quo. “Lego” certainly follows suit, as Johns said the song is a “bully diss track.”

“It’s for anyone who’s ever felt targeted and wants to fight back. A lot of songs about this topic are ‘in your feelings’ type ballads but I wanted to deliver a bully-beat down, a heavy ‘f*** you’ to anyone out there who tries to kill another person’s vibe and confidence. Writing this song gave me the strength to set boundaries and find my own people. Now I want to build that community further through this music.” (Life without Andy)

Just when you thought rock was dead, the kids prove they’ve got it handled. Give “Lego” a listen on Spotify, Apple Music, iTunes, and more.

Cleopatra lived closer to the iPhone coming out than the pyramids being built.

As the information age morphs into the misinformation age, it's hard to know what to believe anymore. Falsehoods are referred to as "alternative facts," established institutional knowledge as "an agenda" and there's so much spin on political narratives that objective truth gets lost in a dizzying stream of senseless word vomit.

It's wise to be skeptical when propaganda abounds, especially when a "fact" looks fake on its face. But in reality, sometimes truth really is stranger than fiction, as evidenced by a Reddit thread in which someone asked for facts that sound fake but are actually true and people delivered.

truth, true, facts, information, random facts It's true. Giphy

Of course, as expected, not all of the responses actually constitute fact. But some fact-checking reveals that a whole bunch of them are true, and they are wild.

Here are 15 true facts that seem totally made up, with links to solid sources that back up their veracity:

"Bananas are berries and strawberries aren’t."

TRUE: Botanically speaking, there are all kinds of things that are berries that we don't realize are berries, and vice versa.

"There is a fish with the scientific name Boops boops."

TRUE: That's not a nickname, either. The actual scientific name of the fish is Boops boops. The common name is bogue.The most delightful thing ever.

"The chainsaw was originally invented to deliver babies."

TRUE: Yep. I know. So disturbing. I won't go into detail, but if you're curious, here's the whole gruesome history.

"Radio Shack sued a regional auto parts chain Auto Shack for infringing on their name. Auto Shack changed their name to AutoZone. Years later, Radio Shack created a section called POWERZONE so AutoZone sued them for infringing on their name."

TRUE: And the fact that there was more than a decade in between the lawsuits just makes it all the more petty. The lawsuits were technically between the Tandy Corporation (the parent company of Radio Shack) and AutoZone (which started out as Auto Shack). The first trademark infringement action was brought by Tandy against Auto Shack in 1985 and was settled in 1987 with Auto Shack changing its name to AutoZone. The action brought by AutoZone over Radio Shack's POWERZONE name ended in summary judgment in 2001 and unsuccessfully appealed in 2004. AutoZone may not have been successful in its legal action, but Radio Shack wasn't successful in holding onto its business, so who really won in this battle?

"Woolly mammoths were still alive when the Egyptian pyramids were being built."

TRUE: This one kicks of a few wild ancient Egypt facts. We often think of wooly mammoths as caveman days creatures, which they were. But they lived on Earth for a looooong time, dying out around 4,000 years ago (so approximately 2,000 B.C.). The Egyptian pyramids were built roughly between 2700 B.C. and 1500 B.C., so yep, wooly mammoths overlapped right in there.

To be fair, it was a pretty small band of mammoths that managed to stay alive on an island for thousands of years after their peers had kicked it, but still. They were there.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"Cleopatra lived closer to the invention of the iPhone than the building of the Pyramids of Giza."

TRUE: The Pyramids of Giza were built between 2575 and 2465 B.CB.C. Cleopatra lived from 69 to 30 B.C. The first iPhone came out in 2007. The math checks out.

"There would be a lot more ancient Egyptian mummies around if the Victorians didn’t turn most of them into paint or eat them."

Ew, but TRUE: Sorry about this one. Victorian artists did grind up mummies to make paint—in fact, the pigment created from them was literally called "mummy brown." And as far as eating the mummies goes, yep, they did that, too. For medicinal reasons, apparently. They crumbled Egyptian mummies into drinkable tinctures to help stop internal bleeding.

Oh, and just for a bonus fun fact, they also used to have mummy-unwrapping parties.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"Pokemon has made more money than Harry Potter, Marvel, the Beatles, and Taylor swift combined. Pokemon is the highest grossing IP of all time and it isn’t even remotely close. Pokemon is many $10B’s ahead of second place."

TRUE: Pokemon has been around since 1997 and in that time has earned a whopping $103.6 billion in total retail sales, with a cool $12 billion of that coming from 2024 alone. For reference, the Harry Potter franchise has made somewhere just north of $25 billion between all of the books, movies, and merchandise. The Marvel Cinematic Universe has made around $31 billion since 2008. The Beatles and Taylor Swift are estimated to have accumulated a net worth somewhere in the $1 to $2 billion range, so yes, Pokemon has left them in the dust, even all combined. As far as being $10Bs ahead of second place, it might depend on what you technically consider an IP (intellectual property). Regardless, Pokemon is raking in the dough.

"The U.S. Appalachian Mountains and the Scottish Highlands are the same mountain range, torn asunder by plate tectonics. The ancient mountains are older than sharks, themselves older than the Rings of Saturn, and knew a world before trees."

TRUE (mostly): The Appalachian Mountains are among the oldest mountains in the world, dating some 1 billion years back in Earth's history, before sharks and trees. When the Pangaea supercontinent split, what is now the Appalachians and the Scottish Highlands parted ways.

The only part of this claim that's iffy is the Rings of Saturn part. Scientists thought they were only around 400 million years old, but now they think they might be off by several billion years.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"Up until a few months ago, John Tyler, the 10th president of the United States, had a living grandson."

TRUE: As the rest of the response explains, "John Tyler was born in 1790 and took office in 1841 when he assumed the presidency upon William Henry Harrison's death; he had 8 children with his first wife and 7 with his second, the youngest being born in 1860 when he was 70, making him the US president who fathered the most children.

His son Lyon had a child when he was 75 years old, in 1928; Tyler's grandson Harrison Ruffin Tyler, was living in Virginia until his passing on May 25th, 2025. The difference from John Tyler's birth to Harrison Tyler's death was a span of 235 years."

That's a lot of genealogical math, but it's legit. The grandson of the 10th U.S. president, John Tyler, died in May of 2025 at the age of 96. Totally bonkers.

dennis the menace, comics, cartoon, fun facts, two Dennis the Menaces Did you know there were two Dennis the Menaces? Giphy

"There are two comic strips called Dennis the Menace - one from the UK, one from the US. They have nothing to do with each other and were developed entirely separately from each other - but they both premiered on the same day (March 12 1951)."

TRUE: Yep. Smithsonian magazine calls the U.K. version the "evil British twin" of the U.S. comic character, a truly "sinister counterpart" to the lovable little rascal we Americans know as Dennis. It's just a super weird coincidence that they came out at exactly the same time.

"Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is the fear of long words."

TRUE: Delightfully verified by Merriam-Webster.

"Michelin stars are given out by the Michelin tire company. It was a marketing ploy, designed to get people to drive further, and to wear down their tyres. Now it is seen as one of the highest endorsements in the cooking world."

TRUE: Yep, the coveted Michelin stars that tell us how fine a dining establishment is come right from the Michelin tire company. Kind of makes them feel a lot less fancy, doesn't it?

michelin, michelin guide, michelin stars, michelin tires, michelin man This Michelin? Really? Giphy

"You can fit all the other planets in the solar system between the earth and the moon."

TRUE: Even NASA says so. (Though the use the phrase "just about fit," but close enough.)

"The majority of the Canadian population lives south of Seattle."

TRUE: Literally south. When you see it on a map, it's pretty clear. It's not some kind of map magic, either. It's just that the vast majority of Canada's population lives in the cities of Toronto, Ottawa, Montréal, and Québec City, which all sit below the 49th parallel and south of Seattle.

This is not an exhaustive list of facts that sound made up but are actually true, but hopefully you've had your mind blown enough for one article. Isn't reality a hoot?

Credit: Condé Nast (through Vogue Taiwan)

Prepare to get Thatcherized.

Adele has a face that is chiseled into the public's mind. She's been a global icon for two decades with a number of mega hit albums and songs. But this photo might be the most unforgettable of all. Perhaps you’ve seen the image in question previously (it seems to make the rounds every couple of years). But in case you missed it—it’s Adele’s face. Normal, just upside down.

Only it’s not normal. In fact, when you turn Adele’s face right side up, what you notice is that her eyes and mouth were actually right-side up THE ENTIRE TIME, even though the entire head was upside down. So when you turn the head right side up, the eyes and mouth are now UPSIDE-DOWN—and you can’t unsee it. Do you feel like you're Alice in Wonderland yet?

Just wait. Things get even more fascinating. Especially because this optical illusion is over 40 years in the making.

Below you’ll find the Adele photo in question. Go ahead. Take a look at it. Then turn the image upside down.


adele, thatcher effect, psychology Can't. Unsee.scontent-lax3-2.xx.fbcdn.net

Crazy right? And just a little terrifying?

As the Facebook post explains, this mind-boggling image highlights a phenomenon known as the Thatcher effect. Our brains, so much more used to recognizing faces that are right-side up, have difficulty detecting specific changes once a face is upside down.

margaret thatcher, colleage of thatcher photos, thatcher effect Image manipulation illustrating the Thatcher effect. Rob Bogaerts Image manipulation: Phonebox

Seeing that everything is more or less where it should be, our brains don’t notice anything out of the ordinary in Adele’s face until we turn her face back to a normal position.

The Thatcher effect got its name from British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, on whose photograph it was first demonstrated back in 1980 by Peter Thompson, Professor of Psychology at York University.

This demonstration was one of the first to explore just how facial recognition works, and certainly the first to suggest that humans (and monkeys, it turns out) process faces on a more holistic level, rather than by individual components like lips and eyes. There's even evidence that rhesus monkeys and chimpanzees experience the Thatcher effect, meaning it may have deep roots in the evolutionary biology of mammals.

Since its publication, there has been a wealth of research exploring how our brain takes in both subtle and striking facial configurations.


- YouTube www.youtube.com


Funny enough, it was once believed that this illusion only worked on the Prime Minister’s face. But as Adele has proven, anyone can be Thatcherized.

This article originally appeared two years ago.

A Wollemi pine and one of its cones.

As the old adage goes, money doesn’t grow on trees. However, what if you had a tree that was so rare that people would spend good money for its seeds? Then you could honestly say that you have a money tree growing in your yard. Such is the case for a retired couple in England, Pamela and Alistair Thompson, both 75, who in 2010 paid £70 ($98) for a 46cm-tall Wollemi pine sapling that a friend bought on the Shopping Channel. It’s believed that it was the first ever endangered tree species to be protected by making it available to the general public.

What is the Wollemi pine?

The Wollemi pine is valuable because it appears in the fossil record as far back as 200 million years ago and was thought to have gone extinct about 70 to 90 million years back. However, in 1994, a bushwalker in Australia came across a Wollemi pine in a secluded gorge. Biologically, it was a discovery as significant as coming across a living dinosaur in a hidden part of Australia in the ‘90s.

Wollemi is an Australian Aboriginal word that means "watch out—look around you."

wollemi pine, endangered trees, australian trees, seattle, washington, rare trees A Wollemi pine in Seattle, Washington. via Brewbooks/Wikimedia Commons


The tree may have made its way to Eurpoe, but the wild trees are under threat from wildfires and climate change. It’s believed that only about 90 exist in the wild today. In 2006, it made its European debut when Sir David Attenborough planted one at the Royal Botanic Gardens in Kew. “How exciting we should discover this rare survivor from such an ancient past,” Attenborough said.

After 15 years of special care, the Thompson’s tree began to bear fruit for the first time in August 2025. “This year has been so ­unusually dry, it happened earlier,” she said, according to The Times. The couple now plans to package the valuable seeds from the tree and give the money to the National Garden Scheme. The National Garden Scheme is a government program where people open their gardens up to the general public, and the money that is generated is donated to the Queen’s Nursing Institute.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

How much does a Wollemi pine cost?

“I saw a small tree for sale for more than £1,000 ($1352), which shows how rare they are. We’re planning to package the seeds five or six at a time and sell the bundles online for £5 ($6.76). We’ve seen some retailers sell them for much more, but we want to make them accessible for people, as well as raise money for charity. We don’t yet know how many will be healthy and produce trees. Only time will tell.”

"We have around five large cones, which have produced about a hundred or so large seeds each. It would be lovely to see just how many seeds we can produce, but I have been very surprised by the numbers so far this year,” she said, according to Unilad. So, if you do the math, 100 seed packs at $6.76 each would go for $6,760. Not bad for just collecting seeds.

But they could make a lot more money off the seeds if they chose to do so. It’s believed that one seed can go for as much as £10 ($13.52). This tree could net them thousands of dollars a year in perpetuity. “It really does prove that money can grow on trees,” Mr. Thompson said, according to The Times.

wollemi pine, endangered trees wollemi pine cone, australia trees, money tree, dinosaur tree A female Wollemi pine cone.via Adrian198cm/Wikimedia Commons

Preserving the Wollemi pine for the future

In 2023, over 170 young Wollemi pines grown by the Botanic Gardens of Sydney, in Australia, were shipped to be planted in 28 botanic gardens with climates that could support the pines, across the UK and Europe. One Wollemi was sent to Atlanta, Georgia, in the U.S.

“Discovering the lost Wollemi pines in the wild was a truly astounding moment for international tree conservation, and to be a leading partner nearly thirty years later in launching this important new metacollection on UK soil is an exciting moment for Forestry England,” Mike Seddon, Forestry England Chief Executive, said in a press release. “As we care for the Wollemi pines we plant today, we’ll be able to study the way they grow, learning with the other botanic gardens how they flourish outside Australia. The climate crisis means that across all continents, many trees like Wollemi pines are facing urgent threats to their survival. We know that 34 per cent of conifers are now endangered, and our ongoing work to research, propagate, and save tree species is more vital than ever.”

@donnac41/TikTok

Her "bedtime snacktimes" have become a healing salve for all

Though the grief of losing a spouse never truly goes away, there tend to be certain times when the pain hits a little harder. Many widows and widowers find that the most mundane rituals they once enjoyed with their partners, such as waking up in the morning or eating a meal, are often the most tender and lonely.

For Donna Clements, 66, who lost her husband of 43 years, Pat, in March (2025), the tradition she missed most was their “bedtime snacks,” where they would munch on a small morsel (sometimes even a late-night run to Mcdonald’s) and chat about their day.

However, Clements decided to keep this tradition alive by sharing her bedtime snack ritual with viewers on TikTok, and it’s ended up being a wholesome healing salve for all.

One video (below) really paints the picture. Donned in burgundy polka-dot pajamas, Clements sits with a bowl of Special K cereal and sliced bananas, giving folks a warm welcome.


“Hey y’all, it’s ‘Bedtime Snacktime,’” she says. “If you’re new here. I’m a recent widow, about five months.This is the hardest time of the day for me, right before bedtime, because my husband and I would always have a snack and talk about our day, and make our plans. I decided I would just do it on TikTok, because I was just aching to talk to somebody.”

Opening up further, she talks about the “dread” she felt going upstairs.

“Do you ever feel that way?” she asks. “Just maybe dread going to bed, or dread going in a certain room, or dread watching something? Don’t really want to go up there tonight, so I’m just having my snack here in the kitchen, just me and you talking about our day.”

Judging by the comments, Clements is certainly not alone in feeling this way sometimes.

“My husband died a year ago,” one person wrote." I still can’t sleep in the dark . I go to bed around 6am and get up at noon. I can't stand being in our bed alone.”

Another added, “I just lost the only grandma I’ve ever known in March. The shows we watched together will stay unwatched. I miss her so much.”

“There are times I sit in my truck. I dread going into my lonely house and I dread eating dinner by myself.”

In the few months since posting her first bedtime snack video, Clements has racked up a loyal following of folks who find as much comfort and connection as she does.


As one fan eloquently put it, “Oh miss Donna, little do you know that you’re that you’re healing us while we’re here to heal you.”

Now, whether the snacks come from suggestions from viewers—like mochi or Dr. Pepper with vanilla creamer—or are her own tried-and-true favorites (chocolate ice cream was apparently one of Pat’s go-to’s), Bedtime Snacktime is something that Clements looks forward to, thanks to the community that has emerged.

@donnac41 Replying to @Ali C Trying Dr Pepper & sweet cream #dirtysoda #momtok @Dr Pepper @Nestlé @Coffee mate @Taylor Bryant #bedtimesnacktime ♬ original sound - Donna Clements


Thanks to opening up about her own grief journey, Clements learned, according to her interview with Today, that “Everybody’s grief journey is different, and then in a lot of ways the same.”

“When you’re going through grief, you wonder, ‘Is this normal? Is this not normal?’ One thing that so many people have said to me is, ‘Just give yourself grace.’ There’s no right or wrong way to grieve. We’re all different. It’s just a journey.”

Indeed, it’s a journey. One perhaps made a little less bittersweet through the right snack…and the right conversation.