Widow shares the 'bedtime snacks' she once had with her husband and it's been healing for all
It started because she was "aching to talk to somebody.”

Her "bedtime snacktimes" have become a healing salve for all
Though the grief of losing a spouse never truly goes away, there tend to be certain times when the pain hits a little harder. Many widows and widowers find that the most mundane rituals they once enjoyed with their partners, such as waking up in the morning or eating a meal, are often the most tender and lonely.
For Donna Clements, 66, who lost her husband of 43 years, Pat, in March (2025), the tradition she missed most was their “bedtime snacks,” where they would munch on a small morsel (sometimes even a late-night run to Mcdonald’s) and chat about their day.
However, Clements decided to keep this tradition alive by sharing her bedtime snack ritual with viewers on TikTok, and it’s ended up being a wholesome healing salve for all.
One video (below) really paints the picture. Donned in burgundy polka-dot pajamas, Clements sits with a bowl of Special K cereal and sliced bananas, giving folks a warm welcome.
@donnac41 Bedtime Snacktime let’s talk! #bedtime #snacktime #snack #swingingmedallions #griefjourney #fyp #fypシ #laborday #labordayweekend ♬ original sound - Donna Clements
“Hey y’all, it’s ‘Bedtime Snacktime,’” she says. “If you’re new here. I’m a recent widow, about five months.This is the hardest time of the day for me, right before bedtime, because my husband and I would always have a snack and talk about our day, and make our plans. I decided I would just do it on TikTok, because I was just aching to talk to somebody.”
Opening up further, she talks about the “dread” she felt going upstairs.
“Do you ever feel that way?” she asks. “Just maybe dread going to bed, or dread going in a certain room, or dread watching something? Don’t really want to go up there tonight, so I’m just having my snack here in the kitchen, just me and you talking about our day.”
Judging by the comments, Clements is certainly not alone in feeling this way sometimes.
“My husband died a year ago,” one person wrote." I still can’t sleep in the dark . I go to bed around 6am and get up at noon. I can't stand being in our bed alone.”
Another added, “I just lost the only grandma I’ve ever known in March. The shows we watched together will stay unwatched. I miss her so much.”
“There are times I sit in my truck. I dread going into my lonely house and I dread eating dinner by myself.”
In the few months since posting her first bedtime snack video, Clements has racked up a loyal following of folks who find as much comfort and connection as she does.
@donnac41 Blueberry White Chocolate Cheese Cake #bedtime #snacktime #snack #joinme #griefjourney #bedtimeroutine #fyp #fypシ #fastfooddonna ♬ original sound - Donna Clements
As one fan eloquently put it, “Oh miss Donna, little do you know that you’re that you’re healing us while we’re here to heal you.”
Now, whether the snacks come from suggestions from viewers—like mochi or Dr. Pepper with vanilla creamer—or are her own tried-and-true favorites (chocolate ice cream was apparently one of Pat’s go-to’s), Bedtime Snacktime is something that Clements looks forward to, thanks to the community that has emerged.
@donnac41 Replying to @Ali C Trying Dr Pepper & sweet cream #dirtysoda #momtok @Dr Pepper @Nestlé @Coffee mate @Taylor Bryant #bedtimesnacktime ♬ original sound - Donna Clements
@donnac41 Trying Mochi tonight #bedtime #snacktime #snack #bedtimeroutine @trader joes #mochi #griefjourney #fyp #fypシ ♬ original sound - Donna Clements
Thanks to opening up about her own grief journey, Clements learned, according to her interview with Today, that “Everybody’s grief journey is different, and then in a lot of ways the same.”
“When you’re going through grief, you wonder, ‘Is this normal? Is this not normal?’ One thing that so many people have said to me is, ‘Just give yourself grace.’ There’s no right or wrong way to grieve. We’re all different. It’s just a journey.”
Indeed, it’s a journey. One perhaps made a little less bittersweet through the right snack…and the right conversation.
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