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Think you can't have firsts with an adopted teen? Think again.

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Ad Council - Adopt US Kids

For Scott and Amy Arntson the idea of adoption was always in the back of their minds.

They thought about adoption and talked about it over the years as their biological kids grew up, but the timing just never felt right. Then, two summers ago, they saw a news segment featuring a teenage boy who was waiting for an adoptive family. The segment showcased the hundreds of other teens in their state waiting for permanent families too.

That was it for them. "We looked at each other and said, 'yup, this is our time,'" recalls Amy.

So Scott and Amy began to research adoption from foster care, and quickly realized the great need for families to adopt teens. Roughly 43% of youths actively listed on AdoptUSKids.org are between the ages of 15 and 18 years old. This only solidified their desire to bring a teenager into their family.

The next step was discussing adoption with their kids, Ashleigh and Devan. They wanted it to be a family decision, so everyone had to be on board.

After several discussions over a few days, the kids felt good about it, and the Arntsons were ready to move forward with looking for their new family member.

Amy and Scott reached out to an adoption agency in their hometown of Duluth, Minnesota called North Homes Children and Family Services, and began the process. Eventually they were matched with a 17-year-old boy named Isaiah.

Almost immediately, Amy knew he was going to be a part of their family.

Isaiah is an athlete who enjoys running, and Scott is the head track and field coach at a local high school. Isaiah also has an amazing smile that can only be described as contagious.

Isaiah. All photos via the Arntsons, used with permission.

So Scott and Amy drove four hours to Isaiah's foster home to meet him.

"He’s the only child we ever met," says Amy. "As soon as I met him I knew that he would join our family."

Over dinner, they talked about the sports Isaiah plays and the town of Duluth, which Isaiah had visited and enjoyed. They also talked about math being a difficult subject for him and how Scott might be able to help, as he's also a math teacher. Even though it was their first time meeting, the family felt a connection almost instantly.

The Arntsons invited Isaiah to spend Thanksgiving with them, which was the day after they met him. Amy and her daughter, Ashleigh, drove eight hours to bring Isaiah back to their home for the holiday the very next day.

Between the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays, Isaiah spent most of his weekends with the Arntsons, getting to know them and all their quirks. He was there for some sibling squabbles, two car breakdowns, and a performance by their family band. By the end of December, the Arntsons knew they wanted Isaiah to join their family, but recognized it had to be his decision.

Thankfully, it didn't take long for him to say, 'yes.'

Scott, Isaiah and Amy.

"When you hold a newborn baby in your arms, it’s the exact same thing as when you have a teenager who says they want to join your family," says Amy. "It's the most humbling, loving experience."

The official adoption day was moving for Isaiah too.

"Seeing my dad smile, that was pretty cool," he recalls. "He’s a serious guy, he always has that coach’s face and he smiled. It was a good day."

There was definitely an adjustment period for everyone after Isaiah moved in with the Arnstons.

For example, Amy felt like she needed to put extra effort in so Isaiah always knew that he was loved. One of the things Isaiah loves is scary movies, so she would go see them all in the theaters with him, even though she's not a scary movie person.

Scott also had some adjustments to make.

"I thought after raising two other teens I had an idea of how to raise a teen," he notes. "I was wrong."

The family also took Isaiah on vacations — something he hadn't really experienced before. They spent nights camping, playing games and sharing stories — and that's when Amy feels like Isaiah really started to let his guard down and opened up to them.

Devan, Ashleigh and Isaiah at Mount Rushmore.

Back at home, Isaiah had no trouble starting at his new school. Devan, now his older brother, was a senior there and took Isaiah under his wing at first, but Isaiah's infectious laughter and friendly personality helped him make new friends in no time.

And before the Arntsons knew it, they were experiencing all kinds of firsts with him — prom, getting his driver's license, high school graduation, and moving him into his freshman dorm at college.

Devan and Isaiah ready for prom.

Moving to college was a big deal and left Scott and Amy feeling incredibly proud and emotional, especially since Isaiah is their last child to leave the nest.

While these moments may not have been every first of his life, they were every bit as special.

Amy says she didn't need to rock Isaiah to sleep to love him — she loves him because he's her son.

She wants other prospective parents to know that when you adopt an older child, it doesn't mean they're going to leave when they turn 18. Just like any child, they want a family who will be there for them throughout their life.

When kids in foster care age out of the system, they often have little to no support. A permanent family provides a support system that will forever change their future.

"That's what having a family is," says Amy. "Someone who's there no matter what."

The learn more about the Arntsons, check out the video below:

Science

Researchers dumped tons of coffee waste into a forest. This is what it looks like now.

30 dump truck loads and two years later, the forest looks totally different.

assets.rebelmouse.io

One of the biggest problems with coffee production is that it generates an incredible amount of waste. Once coffee beans are separated from cherries, about 45% of the entire biomass is discarded.

So for every pound of roasted coffee we enjoy, an equivalent amount of coffee pulp is discarded into massive landfills across the globe. That means that approximately 10 million tons of coffee pulp is discarded into the environment every year.


When disposed of improperly, the waste can cause serious damage soil and water sources.

However, a new study published in the British Ecological Society journal Ecological Solutions and Evidence has found that coffee pulp isn't just a nuisance to be discarded. It can have an incredibly positive impact on regrowing deforested areas of the planet.

via British Ecological Society

In 2018, researchers from ETH-Zurich and the University of Hawaii spread 30 dump trucks worth of coffee pulp over a roughly 100' x 130' area of degraded land in Costa Rica. The experiment took place on a former coffee farm that underwent rapid deforestation in the 1950s.

The coffee pulp was spread three-feet thick over the entire area.

Another plot of land near the coffee pulp dump was left alone to act as a control for the experiment.

"The results were dramatic." Dr. Rebecca Cole, lead author of the study, said. "The area treated with a thick layer of coffee pulp turned into a small forest in only two years while the control plot remained dominated by non-native pasture grasses."

In just two years, the area treated with coffee pulp had an 80% canopy cover, compared to just 20% of the control area. So, the coffee-pulp-treated area grew four times more rapidly. Like a jolt of caffeine, it reinvigorated biological activity in the area.

The canopy was also four times taller than that of the control.

Before and after images of the forest

The forest experienced a radical, positive change

via British Ecological Society

The coffee-treated area also eliminated an invasive species of grass that took over the land and prevented forest succession. Its elimination allowed for other native species to take over and recolonize the area.

"This case study suggests that agricultural by-products can be used to speed up forest recovery on degraded tropical lands. In situations where processing these by-products incurs a cost to agricultural industries, using them for restoration to meet global reforestation objectives can represent a 'win-win' scenario," Dr. Cole said.

If the results are repeatable it's a win-win for coffee drinkers and the environment.

Researchers believe that coffee treatments can be a cost-effective way to reforest degraded land. They may also work to reverse the effects of climate change by supporting the growth of forests across the globe.

The 2016 Paris Agreement made reforestation an important part of the fight against climate change. The agreement incentivizes developing countries to reduce deforestation and forest degradation, promote forest conservation and sustainable management, and enhance forest carbon stocks in developing countries.

"We hope our study is a jumping off point for other researchers and industries to take a look at how they might make their production more efficient by creating links to the global restoration movement," Dr. Cole said.


This article originally appeared on 03.29.21

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Pop Culture

Hugh Jackman and Ryan Reynolds deliver the most entertaining 'Hot Ones' interview ever

They reached whole new levels of spicy silliness.

Credit: First We Feast/YouTube

Watching Reynolds keep a brave face while Jackman hopelessly struggles is everything.

Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman ended their promotional journey for “Deadpool and Wolverine” truly in the spiciest way possible.

The superhero duo appeared in the latest episode of “Hot Ones,” the internet’s favorite interview series where guests eat increasingly spicier hot wings while answering burning questions. And boy, torture never looked so good.

At first, each held their own as they discussed how the movie actually began as a fake-out plan.

“The original idea with this movie was to shoot a fake movie called 'Alpha Cop,' that was intentionally bad… It was about two guys that were sharing one brain and together they make the perfect cop…and the poster says ‘Alpha Cop: two cops, one brain, all balls,’” Reynolds explained to “Hot Ones” host Sean Evans.

“And it was meant to be kind of like horrible. Like 10 people in America would go to see this movie on opening weekend and five minutes into the movie the Marvel logo would flip up and it would actually be ‘Deadpool & Wolverine.’”

There was also a chat about former jobs, where Jackman (already beginning to tear up from the heat) recalled being a clown-for-hire.

“I literally rented a clown outfit…and we had no skills, literally no skills…I broke my rule and I did an 8-year-old’s party. I always knew they were going to find me out and he found me out and this kid yelled to his mom, ‘Mom, this clown is crap.' And I’m like ‘Shut up, kid.'”

Then around the halfway point, hilarious chaos ensued. Though both suffered through the latter rounds, poor Jackman was clearly more victimized. Poor fella goes though all the stages of spice grief—tears, sweat, uncontrollable shimmies, delirious laughter…even bargaining.

Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman Go Claws Out While Eating Spicy Wings | Hot Oneswww.youtube.com

"It tastes angry," Jackman said of the sixth hot sauce. "You know what I'm gonna eat? A bag of rusty razors that's what I'm gonna eat."

Reynolds, on the other hand, was doing far better at keeping his cool. As well as his sarcasm.

"Hugh has never felt physical pain so for him as a pampered starlet, this is important, an important rite of passage," he quipped.

This dynamic was, undoubtedly, everybody’s favorite aspect of the interview.

“The funniest part is watching Ryan provide deep, in-depth responses to Sean's questions and Hugh just fighting for his life in the background,” one viewer said.

Another echoed, “Ryan cracking jokes and Hugh just fighting to survive is funnier than it has any right to be. This is one of my favorite ones to date.”

Some else astutely wrote, “You know the friendship is real by how much they enjoy seeing each other suffer. Like brothers, really.”

But of course, even though Reynolds and Jackman have projected animosity toward each other for laughs, underneath all those jabs is a true friendship.

"Most of our conversations are very vulnerable,” Reynolds revealed.

Jackman even praised Reynolds as a “great father, great family, great family, loves his job, loves his work.”

He continued, “and I don't have anything -- apart from making me do this and he said if you don't I'm gonna just disparage you and make fun of you and tell all of Australia that you just didn't have the guts and Canada is better -- but apart from that, I have nothing. There's nothing [bad to say]."

As Evans put it, they bravely “climbed the hot sauce mountain together,” and we love them all the more for it.

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Family

Naming twins is an art. Here are some twin names people say are the best they've ever heard.

With twins, all the regular pressures of having a baby are doubled, including choosing a name.

Photo credit: Canva

Are you in favor of rhyming twin names? Or is it too cutesy?

Having twins means double the fun, and double the pressure. It’s a fairly known rule to name twins in a way that honors their unique bond, but that can lead to overly cutesy pairings that feel more appropriate for nursery rhyme characters than actual people. Plus, it’s equally important for the names to acknowledge each twin’s individuality. Again, these are people—not a matching set of dolls. Finding the twin baby name balance is easier said than done, for sure.

Luckily, there are several ways to do this. Names can be linked by style, sound or meaning, according to the baby name website Nameberry. For example, two names that share a classic style would be Elizabeth and Edward, whereas Ione and Lionel share a similar rhythm. And Frederica and Milo seem to share nothing in common, but both mean “peaceful.”

Over on the /NameNerds subreddit, one person asked folks to share their favorite twin name pairings, and the answers did not disappoint.

One person wrote “Honestly, for me it’s hard to beat the Rugrats combo of Phillip and Lillian (Phil and Lil) 💕”

A few parents who gave their twin’s names that didn’t inherently rhyme until nicknames got involved:

"It's the perfect way! Christmas cards can be signed cutely with matching names, but when they act out you can still use their full name without getting tripped up.😂"

"The parents of a good friend of mine did this: her name is Allison and her sister is Callie. Their names don’t match on the surface, but they were Alli and Callie at home."

“Alice and Celia, because they’re anagrams! Sound super different but have a not-so-obvious implicit connection.”

This incited an avalanche of other anagram ideas: Aidan and Nadia, Lucas and Claus, Liam and Mila, Noel and Leon, Ira and Ria, Amy and May, Ira and Ari, Cole and Cleo…even Alice, Celia, and Lacie for triplets.

Others remembered name pairs that managed to sound lovely together without going into cutesy territory.

twin names, twins, babies, baby namesThese matching bunny ears though. Photo credit: Canva

“I know twin toddler boys named Charlie and Archie and they go so well together,” one person commented.

Another wrote, “Tamia and Aziza. I love how they follow the same sound pattern with the syllable endings (-uh, -ee, -uh) without being obnoxiously matchy matchy.”

Still another said, “Lucy and Logan, fraternal girl/boy twins. I think the names sound so nice together, and definitely have the same 'vibe' and even though they have the same first letter they aren't too matchy-matchy.”

Other honorable mentions included: Colton and Calista, Caitlin and Carson, Amaya and Ameera, Alora and Luella, River and Rosie, and Eleanor and Elias.

One person cast a vote for shared style names, saying, “If I had twins, I would honestly just pick two different names that I like separately. I tend to like classic names, so I’d probably pick Daniel and Benjamin for boys. For girls my two favorites right now are Valerie and Tessa. I think Val and Tess would be cute together!”

Overall though, it seems that most folks were fans of names that focused on shared meaning over shared sound. Even better if there’s a literary or movie reference thrown in there.

twin names, twins, babies, baby namesMany adult twins regret that their names are so closely linked together. Photo credit: Canva

“My mom works in insurance, so I asked her. She’s seen a lot of unique ones, but the only twins she remembers are Gwenivere [sic] and Lancelot... bonus points... little brother was Merlin,” one person recalled.

Another shared, “If I had twin girls, I would name them Ada and Hedy for Ada Lovelace and Hedy Lamarr, both very early computer/tech pioneers. Not that I’m that into tech, I just thought it was a brilliant combination.”

Other great ones: Susan and Sharon (think the original “Parent Trap”), Clementine and Cara (types of oranges), Esme and Etienne (French descent), Luna and Stella (moon and stars), Dawn and Eve, plus various plant pairings like Lily and Fern, Heather and Holly, and Juniper and Laurel.

Perhaps the cleverest name pairing goes to “Aubrey and Zoe,” since…wait for it… “they’re A to Z.”

It’s easy to see how naming twins really is a cool opportunity for parents to get creative and intentional with their baby naming. It might be a challenge, sure, but the potential reward is having the most iconic set of twins ever. Totally worth it!

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Family

Wife has the perfect response when husband introduces her to coworkers as 'The Housewife'

She began by laughing hysterically.

via Artur Voznenko/Unsplash

An anry wife shares her thoughts with her husband.

A husband invited some new coworkers over for dinner and instead of properly introducing his wife, he made a sexist joke that she felt was belittling. The wife, who goes by the name Sadie on Reddit, shared the story on the AITA forum to ask if she responded correctly.

Spoiler alert: Yes, she did.

“My husband invited his new coworkers over for dinner. When they arrived, he introduced me by gesturing at me and saying, ‘This is Mrs. Smith (he didn't even say my name)...the housewife!'" Sadie revealed.

“I looked at him for a second, then I started laughing hysterically,” Sadie continued. “I then told said, ‘No, honey, I work full time, and YES I still act like a housewife when I'm home because you simply can't bother to help.’” After Sadie’s remark, the guests stared at the husband, who tried to laugh it off and then changed the subject by asking them if they wanted a drink.

The rest of the dinner was awkward, with the husband and wife exchanging angry glances. After the guests left, the husband blew up at Sadie, saying that she laughed like a “lunatic” and that she ruined “his image.”

“I told him he was wrong to lie about my status and deny my degree, to begin with,” Sadie continued. He said I could've talked to him about it privately later but not like this, and making his coworkers think he's useless.” Sadie asked the online forum if she was out of line, and they responded with a collective no.

People overwhelmingly supported the wife, raising an issue far beyond the fact that her husband was seriously inconsiderate. It’s a big red flag in a relationship when one spouse diminishes or belittles the other in public or private.

“Men who diminish their partners to look better at the office are gross. He only seemed to care about his embarrassment and not yours. I'd be mortified if my husband used a lie that robbed me of my success and accomplishments to prop himself up," Geranium27 wrote.

“It's a red flag for the relationship. He doesn't want a partner who is an equal. He wants a dependent woman who he can provide for completely so he can feel like a man," RedWanderingLizard added.

Some also noted that it was wrong of him to disparage homemakers.

"He diminished (being a housewife is not a ‘low’ role, but he meant it that way) you in public, you corrected him. In public. As he deserved,” LetThemEatHay wrote.

The viral post received over 24,000 comments, highlighting the idea that belittling your partner is a serious sign of a dysfunctional relationship that should not be ignored.

According to Psychology Today, backhanded compliments, digs and subtle put-downs are attempts by one partner to make the other feel small and themselves feel big. “Although cleverly disguised as a joke or a compliment, these comments may qualify as ‘toxic’ if they sting, cause confusion, and replay in a person’s mind for days, disrupting their peace,” Erin Leonard, Ph.D. writes.

Ultimately, commenters overwhelmingly agreed that Sadie was right not to let her husband's belittling compliment go unnoticed. By sharing it online, she opened up a meaningful discussion about appropriate humor in relationships. Studies show that it’s healthy for partners to joke around with one another, but when the comments are thinly veiled put-downs and backhanded compliments, it’s no laughing matter.


This article originally appeared on 5.9.24

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Identity

A teacher had to tell her deaf students that people can hear farts. Their reaction was hilarious.

This is amazing.

Photo from Facebook.

Anna Trupiano educates on passing gas in public.

Anna Trupiano is a first-grade teacher at a school that serves deaf, hard-of-hearing, and hearing students from birth through eighth grade.

In addition to teaching the usual subjects, Trupiano is charged with helping her students thrive in a society that doesn't do enough to cater to the needs of the hard-of-hearing.

Recently, Trupiano had to teach her students about a rather personal topic: passing gas in public.

A six-year-old child farted so loud in class that some of their classmates began to laugh. The child was surprised by their reaction because they didn't know farts make a sound. This created a wonderful and funny teaching moment for Trupiano.

Trupiano shared the conversation on Facebook.

1st grade, farts, passing gas

"Wait, they can hear all farts?!?!"

See posts, photos and more on Facebook.

deaf, education, funny

An education reduced to conversations on farts.

See posts, photos and more on Facebook.

students, teacher, sound

Farts are funny.

See posts, photos and more on Facebook.

hard of hearing, vapors, gas

The discerning listener.

See posts, photos and more on Facebook.

While the discussion Trupiano had with her students was funny, it points to a serious problem faced by the deaf community. "I know it started with farts, but the real issue is that many of my students aren't able to learn about these things at home or from their peers because they don't have the same linguistic access," she told GOOD.

"So many of my students don't have families who can sign well enough to explain so many things it's incredibly isolating for these kids," she continued.

Trupiano hopes her funny story about bodily functions will inspire others to become more involved with the deaf community by learning sign language.

"I would love to see a world where my students can learn about anything from anyone they interact with during their day," she told GOOD. "Whether that means learning about the solar system, the candy options at a store, or even farts, it would be so great for them to have that language access anywhere they go."

Interested in learning ASL? Here's a great list of places you can start.

While the discussion Tupiano had with her students was funny, it points to a serious problem faced by the deaf community. "I know it started with farts, but the real issue is that many of my students aren't able to learn about these things at home or from their peers because they don't have the same linguistic access," she told GOOD.

"So many of my students don't have families who can sign well enough to explain so many things it's incredibly isolating for these kids," she continued.

Tupiano hopes her funny story about bodily functions will inspire others to become more involved with the deaf community by learning sign language.

"I would love to see a world where my students can learn about anything from anyone they interact with during their day," she told GOOD. "Whether that means learning about the solar system, the candy options at a store, or even farts, it would be so great for them to have that language access anywhere they go."

Intersted in learning ASL? Here's a great list of places you can start.


This article originally appeared on 12.14.18

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