+
upworthy

jimmy kimmel

"What Do You Know About The Female Body?" from Jimmy Kimmel

When Jimmy Kimmel takes to the street, you know you’re in for a good laugh at just how little we actually know about, well, seemingly anything. That goes for anatomy too. In this case, female anatomy.

In a segment called “What Do You Know About The Female Body?” men try—and hilariously fail—to answer even the most basic questions, like “does a female have one uterus, or two?” much to the amazement of some of their female partners.

Here are some of the very best bits of nonwisdom:


Woman have LOTS of fallopian tubes and ovaries, apparently.

When asked, “how many fallopian tubes does the average lady have?” one man prefaced with “I know I’m gonna be way off,” before answering “four.”

He was right about being way off, indeed. Women usually have one fallopian tube on either side of the uterus, making that two fallopian tubes.

Another guy guessed that a woman has not one, not two, but six ovaries. Which, in case you didn’t know, is three times more than the correct answer (two ovaries, one on either side of the uterus). Where would a woman keep four extra ovaries? Her purse?

A mammogram examines the stomach.

The interviewer also asked: “What part of the body does the mammogram examine?"

"The lower half…" replied one man. Yikes.

And when asked to demonstrate where exactly the “lower half” is, he gestured toward the uppermost part of his belly, seemingly avoiding the actual area a mammogram covers entirely.

PMS is all in the mind, but only annually.

The next question up was “What does PMS stand for?"

One man shyly answered, “Post…mental…syndrome?”

One outta three ain’t bad. But the correct answer is premenstrual syndrome.

And it definitely happens more than “once a year.”

An IUD is a “mammogram device.”

Oh, and a NuvaRing is a “pap schmear,” and a speculum is the actual “IUD.” Holy moly, if you thought IUDs were uncomfortable before…

Things really took a turn once the graphics came out.

And men were asked to point to where the cervix is. Plenty of things were pointed at—like the uterus. But sadly, no cervix findings.

Changing gears, the interview instructed the men to “point at something you know.”

To which one man replied (inaccurately) “uh…that’s a baby?”

Unless the woman is giving birth to a colon, that was incorrect.

Later in the video, a man is asked “where does the baby go?”

“In there,” the man answers after pointing to the ovaries. (Spoiler alert: It doesn’t go there. A fetus grows in the uterus, which this man thought was the cervix.)

His wife, a gynecologist no less, chuckled “I’m mortified…I’m apparently not a very good educator at home for my husband.”

Though this is just for pure fun, it is food for thought.

A woman’s autonomy over her own body has been the subject of much controversial discussion lately. And I can’t help but wonder how certain politicians/leaders would fare if given the same questions. Perhaps it is unwise to try to govern that which is not fully understood, just saying.

You can catch the full segment here:


This article originally appeared on 01.14.22

The White House Correspondents' Association dinner is an opportunity for the politically powerful to showcase their ability to take a joke. Naturally, Donald Trump won't go near it.

For the second straight year, Trump won't be in attendance for the dinner. Not exactly known for his ability to poke fun at himself or smile along, it makes sense that he wouldn't want to be there for an evening that both undercuts and exaggerates the press's supposedly adversarial relationship with our nation's leaders.

While the event itself dates back more than 100 years, it wasn't until 1993 that C-SPAN began airing the whole thing live. Since then, comedians, such as Conan O'Brien, Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, Jay Leno, Drew Carey, Wanda Sykes, Jimmy Kimmel, and Seth Meyers, have taken the stage to jab at the politicians and the press — all in good fun.


Let's look back at some of the funniest and most daring jokes from past White House Correspondents' Association dinners, made by celebs and politicos alike.

Larry Wilmore in 2016 took jabs at the obscurity of C-SPAN and a failed promise.

"It is good to be on C-SPAN. Glad I’m not on your rival network, 'No input, HDMI1.'"

"Oh, I just got a note from the president saying that if you want another drink, you should order it now because the bar will be closing down. Of course, he said the same thing about Guantanamo, so you have at least another eight years."

Comedian Larry Wilmore hosted in 2016. Photo by Olivier Douliery-Pool/Getty Images.

During his final dinner in 2016, President Obama starred in a video contemplating life after the White House.

In 2015, Cecily Strong of "Saturday Night Live" brought up reproductive rights.

"Since I’m only a comedian, I’m not going to try and tell you politicians how to do politics. That would be like you guys telling me what to do with my body. I mean, can you even imagine?"

Joel McHale used his 2014 platform to torch ... well, everyone.

"C-SPAN is like one of those 'Paranormal Activity' movies. It’s just grainy shots of empty rooms interrupted by images of people you’re pretty sure died a few years ago."

"Jeb Bush might announce that he’s running. Wow, another Bush in the White House. Is it already time for our every-10-years surprise for Iraq?"

"At this point, CNN is like the RadioShack at a sad strip mall. You don’t know how it stayed in business this long, you don’t know anyone that shops there, and they just fired Piers Morgan."

"[Fox News anchors are the] Mount Rushmore of keeping old people angry."

Joel McHale and President Obama during the 2014 dinner. Photo by Olivier Douliery/ABACAUSA.com.

In 2013, Conan O'Brien took on Twitter, Mitt Romney, and Obama's name.

"If in 1995 you told me that in 2013 we'd have an African-American president with a middle name Hussein who was just elected to a second term in a sluggish economy, I would have said, ‘Oh, he must have run against Mitt Romney.'"

"If any of you are live-tweeting this event, please use the hashtag '#incapableoflivinginthemoment. Yes, also to any U.S. senators here tonight, if you would like to switch either your dessert or your position on gay marriage, please signal a waiter."

Comedian Conan O'Brien hosted the 2013 event. Photo by Pete Marovich/Bloomberg.

Jimmy Kimmel joked about Occupy Wall Street and Mitt Romney in 2012.

"Americans are in terrible shape. You can even tell how out of shape we are by the way we protest. We used to march. Now we occupy.”

On Mitt Romney: "You can't have a beer with him, because he doesn't drink. You can't have a cup of coffee with him, because he can't have caffeine. You can't even play Monopoly with him because he keeps trying to put the dog on the car."

Seth Meyers jabbed at Donald Trump and the Huffington Post during his 2011 set.

"Donald Trump has said he's running for president as a Republican, which is surprising because I thought he was running as a joke."

"The New York Times party used to be free, but tonight there's a cover, so like everyone else I'll probably just go to the Huffington Post party. And the Huffington Post party is asking people to go to other parties first and just steal food and drinks and bring it from there."

In 2011, Obama took a few (joking) swipes at Donald Trump and his presidential ambitions. Oops.

“Now, I know that he’s taken some flak lately, but no one is prouder to put this birth certificate to rest than the Donald. Now he can get to focusing on the issues that matter. Like, did we fake the moon landing? What really happened at Roswell? And where are Biggie and Tupac? All kidding aside, we all know about your credentials and experience. In 'Celebrity Apprentice,' the men team’s cooking did not impress the judges from Omaha Steaks, but you recognized that this was a lack of leadership, so you fired Gary Busey. These are the kinds of decisions that would keep me up at night. Well-handled, sir. Well-handled."

In 2015, Obama brought up Keegan-Michael Key to play the role of Luther, his anger translator. Photo by Olivier Douliery-Pool/Getty Images.

During the 2008 event, Craig Ferguson got laughs with his deadpan suggestion that Dick Cheney lives in a dungeon.

"Tonight we mark the end of an era. George W. Bush leaves in eight months. The vice president is already moving out of his residence. It takes longer than you think to pack up an entire dungeon."

Comedian Craig Ferguson hosted the 2008 event. Photo by Kristoffer Tripplaar-Pool/Getty Images.

Stephen Colbert's 2006 performance is the stuff of legend, but didn't exactly win him many friends at the time.

"I know there’s some polls out there saying that this man has a 32% approval rating. But guys like us, we don’t pay attention to the polls. We know that polls are just a collection of statistics that reflect what people are thinking in ‘reality.’ And reality has a well-known liberal bias."

"Here's how it works: the president makes decisions, the press secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the press type those decisions down. Make, announce, type. Just put 'em through a spellcheck and go home. ... Write that novel you got kicking around in your head. You know, the one about the intrepid Washington reporter with the courage to stand up to the administration. You know — fiction!"

Comedian Stephen Colbert performed during the 2006 dinner. Photo by Roger L. Wollenberg/Getty Images.

In 2004, President George W. Bush got a lot of criticism when he showed a sideshow of him jokingly looking around the Oval Office for weapons of mass destruction.

Sure, nothing should be off-limits in comedy, but maybe making a joke about how we were led to war based on a lie is a bit callous.

President Clinton played the role of a bored lame-duck president in this 2000 video.

In 1995, Conan O'Brien implored loyal C-SPAN viewers to please find something else to do on a Saturday night.

"I have an announcement for those of you watching this event live on C-SPAN. For God's sake, it's Saturday night! Go outside! ... There are things you can do!"

President Bill Clinton laughing during the 1996 event. Photo by Ted Mathias/AFP/Getty Images.

The show must go on, as they say.

Last year's host was Hasan Minhaj, who scorched the president with a comparison to King Joffrey from "Game of Thrones." This year, the event will be hosted by Michelle Wolf. It's sure to be as awkward as ever — and it's still pretty strange to see the press rubbing elbows with the same politicians their jobs require them to criticize. But with the world as dark as it is right now, maybe we do need to just find a way to laugh.

Comedian Hasan Minhaj hosted the 2017 White House Correspondents' Association dinner. Photo by Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images.

More

Jimmy Kimmel asked a 2nd grader to explain trade to Trump. She didn't disappoint.

'Are trade deficits good or bad? They're both, Mr. President.'

Managing global economics isn't for everyone.

It takes levelheadedness, a knack for diplomacy, and a basic understanding of math.


Unfortunately, if the recent tweets by businessman-turned-President Donald Trump are any indication, he may be lacking in all three.

On April 4, Trump tweeted that "when you're already $500 billion DOWN, you can't lose!"

The statement was in regards to the U.S. trade deficit. America's largest deficit, by country, is with China.

In recent weeks, Trump has escalated talks of a trade war with China, slapping a 25% tariff on several Chinese-made products on April 3. China retaliated by imposing its own tariffs on $50 billion-worth of American goods, including pork and soybeans.

Many economists say these moves will inevitably hurt workers in U.S. agricultural and manufacturing sectors — ironically, the same industries Trump vowed to protect.

The scary thing, as Jimmy Kimmel pointed out during the April 5 episode of his show, is that Trump doesn't seem to understand the complexities of trade.

“[Trump] seems to think that if one side has a deficit, that side is losing by $500 billion," Kimmel said, pointing to Trump's tweet. "That's not how trade deficits work."

So, on the off-chance Trump might be tuning in that night, the late night host asked a second-grader named Shilohto explain the concept of trade deficits to the president.  

It was funny, adorable — and actually really informative, too. Check it out (story continues below):

It's OK — if global trade isn't your forte, I'll break down Shiloh's lesson.

"What is a trade deficit?" she began the video. "It sounds like a bad thing. But really, it's just the difference between how much we buy from another country and how much we sell to that country. So, if we buy more stuff from China than we sell to them, that's a trade deficit."

[rebelmouse-image 19477017 dam="1" original_size="566x242" caption="All GIFs via "Jimmy Kimmel Live!"/YouTube." expand=1]All GIFs via "Jimmy Kimmel Live!"/YouTube.

"But don't freak out," she assured viewers. "We didn't actually lose anything, because we have all the stuff we bought."

Despite the scary name, deficits can actually be a good thing, she explained — it often indicates a strong national economy and means we have more money on hand to spend.

"But there are problems," as she pointed out.

Trump's more populist, protectionist ideas have some merit. She said, "Some American workers lose their jobs making stuff if we buy that stuff from other countries." Those abroad who end up with those jobs may work under dangerous working conditions and get paid less than U.S. workers would have.

The moral of Shiloh's story?

Trade deficits are complicated. They result in both pros and cons for us in the U.S. And the totality of their effects can't be adequately summed up in a 280-character tweet.

"So, are trade deficits good or bad? They're both, Mr. President," Shiloh concluded. "If you have any other questions, let me know. Good luck."

Abstinence-only sex education is making a comeback.

The Department of Health and Human Services is shifting away from comprehensive sex education — in which abstinence is only one component of instruction — and toward a model that emphasizes delaying sex.

If you're there thinking, "Wait, what?" You're not the only one.


Jimmy Kimmel, (almost) everyone's favorite late-night comedian, had a lot to say about the issue. Buckle up, folks, it's going to get bumpy.

Kimmel, who's no stranger to calling out controversial issues, found it hypocritical that the Trump administration is asking to earmark $75 million to champion the euphemistically titled "sexual risk avoidance education" considering the latest of the president's many scandals.

So the comic did what he does best, lighting up Trump's plan with his own abstinence-only pamphlet.

The video’s funny, but here’s something a little less hilarious: A focus on abstinence-only education is terrible for teens.

Organizations receiving Sexual Risk Avoidance Education funding, for instance, would have to teach teens about contraception from a theoretical rather than a practical perspective. Huh? Exactly. Instructors will still present the idea that birth control and barrier methods exist somewhere out in the real world, but non-prescription contraception won’t be distributed or even demonstrated.

Basically, we’re going to have a lot of this:

GIF from "Mean Girls."

(Thank god for YouTube, right?)

There's loads of research to back up how much abstinence-only education doesn’t work.

Data shows that abstinence-only education doesn’t actually decrease pregnancy rates among teens. It does the opposite.

And while opponents of comprehensive sex ed think teaching kids about disease prevention and contraception encourages early sexual activity, the flip side is that not teaching these ideas doesn’t make teens less fascinated with sex. It just leaves them confused and without the knowledge they need to make educated decisions about sex.

Laura Lindberg, co-author of a 2017 report that confirmed abstinence-only programs didn’t reduce either teen pregnancy or delay the age of sexual activity, put it bluntly to NPR, "We fail our young people when we don't provide them with complete and medically accurate information."

That’s especially evident in the case of Sen. Bill Cassidy (R-Louisiana), whose staunch support of abstinence-only education didn’t prevent the pregnancy of his own 17-year-old daughter in 2014.

Another study found that teens who received abstinence-only education were less likely to use condoms while still engaging in sexual activity.

So what actually reduces rates of teen sex and pregnancy? Comprehensive education and affordable contraception methods.

But being transparent with teens about safe sex is only one piece of the puzzle.

Teaching teens they should wait until marriage can be particularly stigmatizing. As Dr. Terez Yonan, a physician specializing in adolescent medicine told Teen Vogue, the heteronormative framework such programs are based on alienates and sidelines LGBTQ youth. "It isolates them," she said. "They don’t learn anything about how to have sex with a partner that they’re attracted to and how to do it in a safe way that minimizes the risk of STDs and pregnancy."

Abstinence-only education also often provides teens with information on relationships and consent that marginalizes and puts pressure on young women.  As Refinery 29 points out, these programs "engage in teaching affirmative consent and violence prevention in ways that perpetuate gender stereotypes, such as putting the onus on young women to be in control of young men's sexual behaviors."

But even if the above weren’t true (and all of it is), abstinence-only education is behind the cultural curve in general. Marriage rates are dropping as priorities and cultural ideas about the role of marriage change. Many are waiting until they’re older to get married or deciding not marrying at all. According to 2015 statistics, the average age of first marriage was 27 for a woman and 29 for a man in America.

Are we really expecting teens to wait until they’re almost 30 to figure out the right way to unroll a condom (there’s a reason we need the banana demonstration!) or that lube is a must in the bedroom?

Abstinence-only education, while ostensibly well-intentioned, is also often terrifying.

Take this clip from the 1991 movie "No Second Chance" for instance. It intercuts a teacher threatening an entire classroom with death by venereal disease with grainy stock footage of a man loading a gun.

"What if I want to have sex before I get married?" One nervous student asks.

"Well," the teacher says, leaning in close, "I guess you just have to be prepared to die."

It hasn’t gotten much better. While the fashions have changed, a 2015 episode of "Last Week Tonight" made it clear that the message remains the same: Sex before marriage is dangerous, shameful (especially for young women), and morally repugnant.

If we really want to give today’s youth a chance at a bright and healthy future, it’s going to come from frank and open discussions about sex, sexuality, and healthy relationships — not by scaring them into celibacy.

Of course, if we need another idea for how to prevent teens from having sex early, Kimmel has some words of wisdom.  

"I didn’t need abstinence education when I was a teenager," he quipped. "I just played the clarinet."