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Family

Flight attendant tired of seeing moms do all the work on flights asks dads to do better

"You do not have to do all the work. I hate to see it."

via Rahul Singh/Pexels and Electrosolar/Flickr

A flight attendant helping a mother and baby.

There is a significant trend happening right now on social media where women are calling out men for using “weaponized incompetence” as a way to avoid taking responsibility for their families.

Weaponized incompetence is when someone pretends they can't do a task correctly, so someone else ends up doing it instead. In families, this can create an unfair workload and reinforce traditional gender roles, leaving one person with more responsibility than they should have.

Obviously, there are many men out there who are pulling their own weight in their families, but those who live in the past and have no problem having their wives take on unnecessary burdens deserve to be called out.

Recently, a flight attendant on Reddit pointed out the unfair distribution of labor she sees when families take summer vacations. According to Yunghazel, she sees women doing all of the work with children on planes while the dads relax and enjoy the flight.

Some fathers even stay in first class while mom and the kids sit in coach.

“I am sick and tired of seeing the women doing all the work when she travels with her family,” she writes. “She is the one with the boarding passes, knows the seats, wrangles the children, and sits with them. Meanwhile, the husband/dad is sitting in a different row, kid-free, having the time of his life watching a movie.”

“The mom is taking care of the kids, has activities, snacks and does bathroom trips,” she continues. “Oh, and don’t even get me started on the ones who sit in First Class and leave their family in the back.”

She added that when she sees a father allowing his wife to relax on a flight, she will point it out. “I actually complimented one father who was amazing with his 3 kids and the mom was able to relax with a drink and assist as needed,” she wrote. “He was shocked when I told him it was a rare case and lovely to see. He said, ‘I’m just being a dad.’”

She finished the post by asking women to demand to be treated as equals when flying with their families. “Ladies, I am begging you. If you are going on a family vacation this summer, set some travel expectations on how you can tackle the plane ride with your partner so it’s an enjoyable experience. You do not have to do all the work. I hate to see it,” she concluded her post.

The post resonated with many women whose husbands who didn’t pull their own weight on trips.

“I hated trips when I was married and had young kids for this very reason. It was vacation for everyone but me. I spent the entire time minding kids, managing everything, making sure things were figured out, managing a man-baby's emotions and being denied enough sleep to function,” whoinvitedthesepeopl wrote.

“I had a mini meltdown a few years ago because my husband checked us in and sat both kids with me and himself in the aisle seat across,” Treelakerockcloud added. “So while he would be close the bulk of the plane parenting would fall on me. He said that’s because we ‘always did it this way.’”

Many gendered double standards are so deeply ingrained into American society that we have a difficult time noticing them, whether we’re the man hiding behind weaponized incompetence or the woman behaving as mothers have traditionally.

Only when people speak up and point out these forms of inequality will we begin to see some change. That’s why posts like Yunghazel’s are important. Sometimes, someone must point out the obvious to start a conversation that we’ve been waiting too long to have.

From Your Site Articles

travel

Joy

Here's why airlines now charge separately for checked bags and the price keeps going up

Checked bags are $99? Are you kidding me?

via James Emery/Flickr

A group of travelers waits patiently to check their bags.

Maybe you’re one of those elite travelers who’s mastered packing for an entire trip using only carry-on luggage. If so, you’re likely haughty and won’t stop crowing about the convenience of hopping off the plane and jetting to your destination.

We know: The airlines lost your bag in 1986 and you vowed never again. So, now you roll three garments, one pair of shoes, a tiny bottle of 5-in-one body wash, and a Kindle into your backpack, and you're good to go.

For the rest of us mere traveling mortals, especially those with kids, checking bags is a necessary evil—a necessary and costly one.

If it seems to you like checked bag fees have been steadily climbing, that’s because checked bag fees have been steadily climbing. According to this article, bag fees on American Airlines rose 33% just last year from $30 per bag to $40 and 5 of the 6 biggest carriers raised their fees last year.

Why is the entire industry upping their checked-bag fees? There’s a specific reason involving an arcane bit of tax code, which accounts for why the fees are tacked on separately versus rolled into the price of the ticket.

Jay L. Zagorsky, a business school professor who studies travel, says 7.5% of every domestic ticket goes to the federal government. Airlines dislike this, claiming it raises ticket prices for consumers. But as long as the bag fee is separate, it is excluded from the 7.5% transportation tax.

Estimated bag fees for 2023 topped 7 billion. By making the bag fees separate, airlines saved themselves about half a billion dollars. If that savings has been passed down to the customer, then we all got a bit of a break, too.

Perhaps you automatically dislike the separate fees because you’re Gen X and remember a time when a ticket was all-inclusive. Now, it feels like you’re paying for stuff you used to get for free.

Turns out that more and more travelers actually like the separate charges.

“One thing that our research has shown,” Henry Hartevedlt, president of travel industry analytics firm Atmosphere Research told USA Today, “is that more than two-thirds of U.S. leisure airline passengers now feel that the unbundling of the coach product and letting people buy what they want and need on an à la carte basis is actually something they like because it helps them stick to their budget.”

This is a positive way to look at something that’s undoubtedly here to stay. And now if you hear someone complain about bag fees at the airport, you’ll know why it’s done the way it’s done, which is really sweet satisfaction in itself.

Of course, there's always this unusual workaround courtesy of Reddit user Old_Man_Withers, "I Fedex my luggage to the hotel and carry nothing on the plane but my laptop for work. It doesn't matter if it's 2 days or two months, I ship it. The hotel has it waiting in my room when I get there and I ship it back home from there when I'm done. No random inspections, no chances of loss without recompense, fully trackable... I see no downside that isn't worth the 50-100 bucks it costs."

From Your Site Articles

airlines

Joy

Flight attendant reveals the two surefire ways to get a first-class upgrade

You must think like a flight attendant, not a passenger.

via Wrapped Up/Flickr

A flight attendant sits in first class.

How are some people able to upgrade from economy to first class on a commercial air flight? A flight attendant who goes by the name of Cierra Mistt on TikTok recently shared the secrets in a viral video.

According to the Salt Lake City-based flight attendant, there are two ways to get into first class for free. One tactic is for overbooked flights, and the other is for flights with a lot of empty seats.

1. Not-full flight: Sit in the very last row

"On flights that aren't full, we normally have to move passengers for weight and balance purposes, and when we do that, it's normally from back to front. If that's the case, the flight attendants are going to move people from the very last row to the front so that they can sit down there after doing their service because it's a lot more comfy to sit in those passenger seats than it is in the jump seat,” Misty reveals.

2. Overbooked flight: Name your price

You will know you are on an overbooked flight if the flight attendant announces they are compensating passengers to change their booking. If you're interested, Misty advises that you don't take their initial offer but make your own demands. She swears it works nearly every time.

"First, go to the gate agent. Second, give them a price and say that you want that in cash," [name said]. "When the gate agent is rebooking you for that next flight, make sure that they put you in first class to compensate for the time that you're losing because you had to get kicked from that flight. Over 99% of the time this works."

@cierra_mistt
flight attendant secrets- how to get FREE upgrades to FIRST CLASS (p 1) ✈️

This article originally appeared on 4.6.24

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flights

Pop Culture

Airline CEO works a flight attendant shift and is 'astonished' at how 'challenging' it is

More CEOs should do this.

Canva

“Sometimes, you need to change perspectives in order to gain new insights!”

“Sometimes, you need to change perspectives in order to gain new insights!” is not exactly a sentence one might expect to hear from a corporate exec, but it is a philosophy that led Jens Ritter, CEO of German company Lufthansa Airlines, to taking on a shift as a flight attendant.

In a post shared on LinkedIn, Ritter detailed his experience of working as additional cabin crew for a flight heading to Riyadh and Bahrain, taking care of passengers in business class.

Though Ritter’s previous career as a pilot gave him some insight into the challenges of working a flight, taking on the responsibilities of an attendant left him “astonished.”

"I was amazed by how much there is to organize, especially if something doesn't go as planned,” Ritter recalled, noting how on his flight the offered menu items weren’t actually the meals loaded onto the plane.

Beyond purely administrative tasks, Ritter acknowledged the difficult task of addressing individual wishes and dealing with different energies (something airline attendants don’t get credit for nearly enough).

Jens Ritter working as a flight attendant on Lufthansa Airlines

media.licdn.com

And on that note, Ritter found it particularly taxing to “be present and attentive and charming” during an overnight flight “when the biological clock just tells you to sleep.” He confessed that it was an “entirely different” experience than what pilots endure.

Ritter concluded his post by thanking the cabin crew and said that his time spent on the ground (well, on the ground, in the air) would make “deciding things in the office different” moving forward.

At a time when stories of out-of-touch, greedy CEOs inundate the headlines, it’s refreshing to see those in managerial positions actively try to connect, empathize and support their workers, rather than exploit all resources for a bottom line. Not enough business heads recognize how crucial this kind of connection is—not just for the sake of virtue, but for the profit they so desperately want to maintain. But as Ritter’s action shows, it’s not all corporate greed out there.

Ritter found it particularly taxing to “be present and attentive and charming” during an overnight flight.

media.licdn.com

We could probably all stand to benefit from taking a shift in the service industry. The stress of having to maintain everyone’s good time while simultaneously problem-solving, organizing and generally keeping things afloat is not for the faint of heart. And flight attendants in particular juggle it all on a daily basis—and some even manage to make it a show. It’s great that Ritter is advocating for flight attendants by stepping into their shoes.

All in all, a change in perspective can lead to wonderful things.

From Your Site Articles

workers

When three young women and a man boarded his flight, Wesley Hirata had a bad feeling.

The seasoned flight attendant, who has been with Hawaiian Airlines for the past 16 years, was concerned when he noticed an older man walking onto the plane with three young women. They didn't seem like they belonged together.

While this usually wouldn't be cause for concern — families come in all different shapes and sizes, after all — Hirata couldn't shake his instincts.

He talked to the group (though what he asked wasn't specified) and still had more questions. So he spoke to his fellow attendants, and they decided to check the manifest. What they found was shocking: All three women were traveling under the same name. One of them, reports stated, was visibly underage.

Hawaiian law enforcement met the plane when it touched down in Honolulu. After questioning, they labeled the situation as human trafficking and referred the case to the FBI. Airline officials and media at the time quickly reported Hirata had uncovered human trafficking for certain.

As it turned out, the FBI's investigation determined human trafficking had not taken place, but they still praised Hirata's actions.

"We do appreciate Hawaiian Airlines employees for speaking out and saying something and bringing it to our attention," said Jason K. White, spokesman for the Honolulu FBI field office. "We encourage people to remember that if something seems strange or doesn't feel right most times something is wrong, however, that was not the case in this incident."

The FBI eventually confirmed the man was authorized to take the girls on vacation.

Flight attendants are trained to make these kinds of appropriate notifications with a specific aim to curb human trafficking.

In 2015, Congress made it mandatory for flight attendants to be trained in spotting human trafficking. Airline Ambassadors International — a nonprofit made up of airline employees who "travel to make a difference" — holds a yearly seminar on trafficking for flight personnel on an annual basis. And the Association of Flight Attendants, a union with over 50,000 members, has also made stopping the horrible crime of human trafficking an integral part of its mission.

Human trafficking is a global crisis we can all work to end.

According to UNICEF, there are approximately 21 million trafficked people all across the world. 5.5 million of those people are reported to be children. It's not just a crime; it's a business that brings in billions of dollars a year. And that means it's up to all of us to fight to stop it.

So what can you do if you're on a flight and are concerned that someone might be in trouble? "Trust your gut and prior experience [and] report the situation without alarming or confronting the passengers in a suspicious manner," Hirata told KITV 4.

Of course, that doesn't mean you can or should report everything you find suspicious — we've all got to think critically and everyone's got biases — but we should all keep an eye out for signs of trafficking in our communities.

Here's a list of signs to watch out for.

Correction 7/28/2018: A previous version of this story reported Hawaiian law enforcement had confirmed the case as human trafficking, per the airline and on-site media accounts. We have since updated this story to reflect the FBI's announcement.

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flight attendants

Flight attendant tired of seeing moms do all the work on flights asks dads to do better

"You do not have to do all the work. I hate to see it."

Here's why airlines now charge separately for checked bags and the price keeps going up

Checked bags are $99? Are you kidding me?

Flight attendant reveals the two surefire ways to get a first-class upgrade

You must think like a flight attendant, not a passenger.

1. Not-full flight: Sit in the very last row

2. Overbooked flight: Name your price

Airline CEO works a flight attendant shift and is 'astonished' at how 'challenging' it is

More CEOs should do this.

This flight attendant had a gut feeling about human trafficking. So he followed it.

When three young women and a man boarded his flight, Wesley Hirata had a bad feeling.

As it turned out, the FBI's investigation determined human trafficking had not taken place, but they still praised Hirata's actions.

Flight attendants are trained to make these kinds of appropriate notifications with a specific aim to curb human trafficking.

Human trafficking is a global crisis we can all work to end.

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