31-year-old worried just starting college would be 'stupid' is met with waves of support
A heart warming reminder to embrace second chances in life.
There can actually be some advantages to starting college later.
Recently a 31-year-old wondered if they were making a “stupid” decision for wanting to start college, and sought the opinions of strangers online.
In a post made to Reddit, they shared how they had been working retail and dealing with self esteem issues since they were 19, and felt like maybe, just maybe going to school could help them reach their full potential and give them a “purpose.”
However, they also shared that they currently lived with their parents, who warned them that college would be “wasting time and going into debt.” Hence the dilemma.
So this person asked the community, point blank: “Is this a bad decision?” and got a flood of support from well wishers and fellow later bloomers reminding him of the power of embracing second chances. It was a pretty amazing display of humanity for being a plethora of Reddit comments.
Many who had been in similar situations argued that the life experience gained will only help with this person’s studies.
“I’m in skool rn @ your age and it’s actually super easy, you’ll be surprised how things make much more sense with a bit of life experience under your belt. Good luck, you’ll have fun,” one person wrote.
Another added, “Same. I am 34 and started a little over a year ago. I think I am in a much much better position for it now! I am mature, and I am a lot more focused than 18 year old me would have been. It isn’t “easy” at any age. But you’ll be surprised at how much easier it will be than you think it will be now.”
“I graduated at 42. Feels great. Nice to have a lived life of variety and waited to really find my calling. There’s no ultimatum on improving yourself,” said another,
Even those who hadn’t experienced this personally could share stories of loved ones who had–and succeeded.
“My Dad got his university degree after he retired. He previously only had a Grade 8 education. I was proud of him and I’m proud of you OP,” one person wrote.
Another said, “My anecdotal story. My second year in college, a 30-year old man (who was divorced, and had two kids) enrolled as a freshman. They put him as a roommate with someone in the suite I was in. He had been a coal miner for 12 years are was tired of being "covered up", which was his term for being in three cave-ins. He was actually a really cool guy and despite being clearly older, fit in well. And, very long story short, I heard he just retired as the second-in-command in the state's department of energy. So, using his degree, he had a good career in energy policy that spanned over 30 years. So, my answer is no, you are not a loser.”
One person pointed out how starting from this clean slate, however late, might actually be easier than trying to pivot from a career that's already established.
“So many people are stuck in jobs or on career paths that just don't really suit them (me included). I find it all very disappointing, and deeply dissatisfying, and changing paths is honestly very difficult once you're in the daily grind and have responsibilities,” they wrote.
Still another reminded the OP that learning is an integral part of life, no matter what age you are.
“I have always kept learning, and still learn new things and new ways. After I graduated, I continued off and on to pick up new ways. When you quit learning, you might as well crawl in your casket. I'm older and continue, I do not want to get put in a care home and told to watch some insipid show. No, always continue learning. Good for you.”
And some simply came in to offer encouragement, like this person, who wrote, “I just want to chime in that you are absolutely crushing it in life. Throw everything you can into this. Truly rooting for you. I hope I read your ‘I did it’ story in five or so years.”
Tips for Going to College after 30
There can be many reasons for people 25, 30, 40, and beyond to pursue higher education—be it to boost employment prospects or just to continue being lifelong learners. Sure, it might be daunting, but the most worthwhile things usually are. Here are a few things that can help make that process a smoother one.
Make a solid plan
This is just about researching different schools and programs. Hone in on WHY you want a degree, what kinds of opportunities you hope will come from it, how much time you can commit, will you be going in-person or online, etc. A clearly defined, realistic plan that includes specific timelines, milestones, and even little rewards helps keep you on track and motivated.
And remember you don’t have to do this portion alone. There are often career guides that can help. Speaking of which…
Take Advantage of Student Support Services & Resources
Most colleges offer resources like financial aid advisors, academic advisors, tutoring, technical support, on-campus childcare centers, and writing and career centers that can be very helpful. It’s also worth noting that many programs that accept transfer credits or work credits, so that you can leverage on your previous life experience.
Stay organized
Odds are, you will be multitasking schoolwork along with various other adulting tasks. That’s why things like calendars, to-do apps, or even accountability groups are imperative. Plus, you’ll want to find which note taking system works best for you, because it’s definitely not a one-size-fits all approach.. Also, never underestimate the power of designated study space.
Manage stress
Nobody wants to burn out. It might seem impossible to eat well, exercise, get a good night’s sleep and find time to relax when you have so many demands, but even the smallest amounts of consistent self care will give you more energy to put out in the long run.
Commit and Celebrate!
Participate in class, ask questions, tell friends and family of your milestones. A) because you’ll be able to look back and really have memories, beyond just academic accomplishment and b) because you deserve it.
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How much does "being good and looking tall" matter in a corporate setting?
If you find a company that values your contributions, you will know. 
People skills matter in workplace. 
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Lin Manuel Miranda at the Tony Awards. 
There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."