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yelp reviews

Give these ladies an Oscar already.

Online reviews live in a paradoxical world of their own. Their credibility is questionable at best—with positive reviews being either incentivized (if not downright fake) and negative ones being, let’s face it, kind of bonkers. And yet, despite their blatant flaws, a large number of people still use them to influence their purchases.

One thing can be said of negative reviews however: They can be endlessly entertaining.

You might remember seeing actors “performing” impassioned, dramatic (and therefore hilarious) readings of one-star Yelp reviews a few years ago. These videos by "Gotta Kid to Feed" went viral back in 2015, and have recently been resurfacing once again. Why? Because they’re never not funny.


Take this one-star review of Dunkin' Donuts read by actress Therese Plummer, for example. Plummer is a seasoned voiceover actress and lends her talents well in this parody to poke fun at just how intense—and maybe borderline psychotic—some reviews can be.

Unlike the scathing review of Dunkin' Donuts, comments that flooded this video were overwhelmingly positive.

“I never found a 1 star yelp review so riveting!! “ one person wrote.

Another added, “Jesus, there is serious anger in her eyes, this woman is amazing.”

Here’s another one for O’Learys Restaurant in Saint Louis, Missouri, performed by actor Joe Plummer (oddly enough, I don’t think the two Plummer actors are related).

Joe’s character graciously gave a three-star review for the restaurant, since the food was “fresh.” It was the stabbing he didn’t care for.

Yes, he would “consider” coming back despite the stabbing. It’s like Nicole Kidman says at the beginning of every movie at AMC now, “heartbreak feels good in a place like this.” O’Leary’s was just that good.

Here’s another gem of a bad review, this time for San Francisco’s Presidio Cafe. Recognize that face? It’s actress Alysia Reiner from “Orange Is the New Black,” “Blue Bloods” and “Ms. Marvel.”

Apparently Reiner’s character “enjoyed their lunch” at the cafe, but disaster struck after a wayward bird attacked her on her way to the parking lot. Clearly the cafe’s fault.

“The management shirked their duties by not helping me more,” Reiner laments woefully. You can almost catch a single, dignified tear in her eye. She will NOT be dining there. Any. More.

“I know how she feels one time I stepped in a puddle and the nearest store refused to buy me new shoes,” one person joked.

“I guess there's a good reason Hitchcock's ‘The Birds’ takes place in San Francisco,” quipped another.

Further proof that this art form will never go out of style, but merely evolve for modern times: a five-part TikTok series in which Britt, a woman who goes by the username @the.localhedgewitch, brilliantly recreates a negative review from 10 years ago for Bath & Body Works has been going viral online.

@the.localhedgewitch I knew that one day this would somehow come in handy #bathandbodyworks♬ original sound - Britt

Rather than performing a dramatic reading, Britt recites the review alongside the original video while perfectly capturing every single tiny gesture and mannerism. Seriously, her method should be taught in acting classes.

OK, so maybe online reviews aren’t exactly trustworthy. But at least we can have a good laugh at humanity because of them.

Sponsored

This is the most important van in NYC… and it’s full of socks.

How can socks make such a huge difference? You'd be surprised.

all photos provided by Coalition for The Homeless

Every night, the van delivers nourishment in all kinds of ways to those who need it most

True

Homelessness in New York City has reached its highest levels since the Great Depression of the 1930s. Over 50,000 people sleep each night in a shelter, while thousands of others rely on city streets, the subway system and other public locations as spaces to rest.

That’s why this meal (and sock) delivery van is an effective resource for providing aid to those experiencing homelessness in New York City.

Every night of the year, from 7pm to 9:30, the Coalition for the Homeless drives a small fleet of vans to over 25 stops throughout upper and lower Manhattan and in the Bronx. At each stop, adults and families in need can receive a warm meal, a welcoming smile from volunteers, and a fresh, comfy new pair of Bombas socks. Socks may be even more important than you think.

Bombas was founded in 2013 after the discovery that socks were the #1 most requested clothing item at homeless shelters.

Access to fresh, clean socks is often limited for individuals experiencing homelessness—whether someone is living on the street and walking for much of the day, or is unstably housed without reliable access to laundry or storage. And for individuals experiencing or at risk of homelessness —expenses might need to be prioritized for more critical needs like food, medication, school supplies, or gas. Used socks can’t be donated to shelters for hygienic reasons, making this important item even more difficult to supply to those who need it the most.

Bombas offers its consumers durable, long-lasting and comfortable socks, and for every pair of Bombas socks purchased, an additional pair of specially-designed socks is donated to organizations supporting those in need, like Coalition for the Homeless. What started out as a simple collaboration with a few organizations and nonprofits to help individuals without housing security has quickly become a bona fide giving movement. Bombas now has approximately 3,500 Giving Partners nationwide.

Though every individual’s experience is unique, there can frequently be an inherent lack of trust of institutions that want to help—making a solution even more challenging to achieve. “I’ve had people reach out when I’m handing them a pair of socks and their hands are shaking and they’re looking around, and they’re wondering ‘why is this person being nice to me?’” Robbi Montoya—director at Dorothy Day House, another Giving Partner—told Bombas.

Donations like socks are a small way to create connection. And they can quickly become something much bigger. Right now over 1,000 people receive clothing and warm food every night, rain or shine, from a Coalition for the Homeless van. That bit of consistent kindness during a time of struggle can help offer the feeling of true support. This type of encouragement is often crucial for organizations to help those take the next difficult steps towards stability.

This philosophy helped Bombas and its abundance of Giving Partners extend their reach beyond New York City. Over 75 million clothing items have been donated to those who need it the most across all 50 states. Over the years Bombas has accumulated all kinds of valuable statistics, information, and highlights from Giving Partners similar to the Coalition for the Homeless vans and Dorothy Day House, which can be found in the Bombas Impact Report.

In the Impact Report, you’ll also find out how to get involved—whether it’s purchasing a pair of Bombas socks to get another item donated, joining a volunteer group, or shifting the conversation around homelessness to prioritize compassion and humanity.

To find out more, visit BeeBetter.com.

This article originally appeared on 06.01.18


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