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A PERSONAL MESSAGE FROM UPWORTHY
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Education

Adults are sharing things a teacher said or did to them that they've never forgotten

The power of a teacher's words and deeds should never be underestimated.

teacher high-fiving a student

Teachers have a lasting influence throughout our lives.

Few people in our lives have the powerful influence of teachers, for better or worse. During our formative years, feedback from educators and mentors can build our confidence or crush our spirits, make us believe in our abilities, or fill us with self-doubt.

The messages we get from teachers often follows us into adulthood. When those messages are positive, that can be the voices inside our head telling us we're capable and not to give up. When the messages are negative, it can create internal obstacles we have to struggle to overcome.

People on Reddit are answering the question, "What did a teacher say or do to you that you've never forgotten?" and the answers are a testament to the immense responsibility teachers have when it comes to their words and deeds. While there are some painful recollections of uncaring or insensitive teachers, most are a reminder of how many teachers go out of their way to make a positive difference in students' lives.


Support through family issues

"My parents had just divorced and they shared custody of us. When my mother had us, she wouldn't feed us, send us a lunch, bathe or groom us so we'd show up to school tired, hungry, and dirty. When my 1st-grade teacher figured out what was going on, she started keeping a brush and wipes for me in her desk along with lunch money. She'd take me aside before other kids showed up and groom me and feed me. That was about 35 years ago and I still think about her all the time. Ironically, her name was Mrs. Severe. What a beautiful soul. I really needed that maternal care that she gave me."Temporary-Author-641

"I became quite close with one of my band teachers in high school and viewed him as a father figure in many ways. My parents were freshly divorced, and i was floundering without a male role model at all (my father never made attempts to see me). The teacher noticed some changes in me and figured out the story. All it took was a sincere, eyeball-to-eyeball statement of 'I believe in you. You are better than you realize.' And the sun shone brighter, and the clouds parted a bit. When he retired, I made sure to go to his final school concert, and we caught up. It was amazing, but then i saw his wife of several decades. I walked over and introduced myself and thanked her for sacrificing their time together for all those years so he could be someone that his students needed in their lives. We both started crying and hugged.

Thank you, Mr. and Mrs. Rizzo. You are better than you will ever realize."woodworkLIdad

woman holding a cat

Teachers can make a difference outside of the classroom, too.

Photo by Mel Elías on Unsplash

Care and compassion

"Once on the way to school, I found a kitten and couldn't leave it behind. It was dirty, hungry, and in need of help. I had to take it with me to school. At that moment, my parents were against me having a pet... and so, after school, as I sat there crying and not knowing what to do with the kitten, my teacher approached me. She calmed me down and took the kitten with her. After that, she sometimes brought him to class. This way, we continued to communicate. She named him Inkblot. As far as I know, he lived until he was 17. I will always remember this act, as she didn't break my little heart and saved the cute kitten. Double Shot."Wooden-Ranger-8765

"'I know there’s a senior party tonight, if any of you can’t drive at any point during the night you can call me for a ride and I’ll take you home. I won’t tell your parents or get you in trouble, I just don’t want anyone drinking and driving." — Senior biology teacher." chateauboxer777

Understanding mental health struggles

"My freshmen science teacher noticed I was starting to have a panic attack, wrote me a note to go to my counselor and then I left to do so. He was my favorite teacher, I failed almost everything but had the best grade in his class. I will never forget that man, the teacher can make all the difference in a student's work." bigshark276473827

"I had to miss the last 2 months of my sophomore year of high school because I went into an eating disorder treatment program, and had to spend the whole summer making up my classes. My chemistry teacher offered to meet me weekly at the local coffee shop so that she would still be able to actually teach me and make sure I understood the material (as opposed to just teaching myself out of the book like I had to do with the rest of my classes). Graduated college with a bachelors in chemistry 6 years after that." caffa4

"In high school I was the class clown always made people laugh and was there for them. I put up a front 'the happy and cheeriest one' but I was struggling so bad with mental health issues, hated life and myself. Borderline suicidal. Anyway, one day, when I was telling a joke and 'laughing' with everyone, this one teacher took me aside and said, 'You’re such a joy to everyone, but I can see the pain in your eyes. Your place in this world matters and would be so much poorer without you. Don’t give up'. Well god damn I thought I was so good at hiding it from everyone. And it kind of broke me that someone could tell. But yea a moment I’ll never forget."Sarkeshikian

Memorable words of wisdom

"'You’re not a good liar. You shouldn’t do it'…Probably the most useful lesson I learned in all school before college." witblacktype

"'Those who do not have the talent can compensate for it with diligence.' It was a reply to a worry I had, and he was right."mochi_chan

"'What good is going to the church every week if you just gonna go home and abuse your kids?' This was said during a religion class in Ireland secondary school." timchenw

"'Get out before you get stuck.' It was simple wisdom from my 12th grade English teacher that I repeat in my mind quite often. I think he was referring to getting out of our small town, but it rings true for many things in life." RemarkableBeach1603

"'I don't know but I can find out' - my physics teacher Mr. Gould. It's a little thing but it really stuck with me. You don't have to know everything and you don't have to appear like you do either."DarkflowNZ
teacher standing in front of a class of students

Some teachers aren't as nurturing as others.

Photo by National Cancer Institute on Unsplash

The ones you had to prove wrong

"'You won't achieve anything in your life.' I am now an engineer. Every time I was studying I thought about this sentence and it motivated me to be better and work harder to prove him wrong. Even today, every time something is tuff in my life I go over it and remember this sentence, I have to prove him wrong."No_Comment_50

"My science teacher told my parents I 'didn't belong in her class' when I was 13. It was an accelerated class and I finished the year top of her class. Still not sure whether she was a dumb cow or an evil genius." Rosserman

"I remember in my penultimate year of school, my English teacher told my mum in a parent teacher meeting that I should drop to the lower class because hers was too advanced for me. I chose to stay in it out of spite and ended up being one of the top students in my year 🤷♀️" – tlaxette

"Ms. Fowler. My 11th grade math teacher. Told us early on in the school year, 'if you don't understand something the first time I go over it, it's because you weren't paying attention, and I will not waste my time repeating myself.' As someone who struggles with math, I learned the hard way that she meant it. I tried and tried and tried, but I just couldn't get it and she was never any help. Ended up giving up. Just putting random answers to assignments and tests. Flunked out of the class. Think my final grade was in the 20s. Was given the option to pay $150 and go to summer school where I'd just do assignments until I got a passing grade, likely have the same teacher as well. Or, flunk out, repeat the class as a senior and graduate on a lesser plan. I took option B and felt like a failure.

On the flip side. Senior year I got a new math teacher, Mr. Kerr. My grade never went under a 90 in his class. I understood things I never did the year prior. Even got decent at trigonometry. He built a confidence in me I never knew I could have."Klown1327

The ones who believed and encouraged

"I love to sew. I have been sewing since I was a kid. In high school, I took a sewing class as an extra and was miles ahead of the other students. I made a grey, wool, floor length cloak with a red lining while everyone else was making pajama pants. My teacher graded me according to my skill and not compared to the other students. Then she found me a year later and showed me a pic in a catalog of a Renaissance-style dress she thought I'd like. It was a wedding dress but I loved it anyway. My mom took me fabric shopping and the next semester I took that class again and made the dress. My teacher stayed in with me during lunches, after school, during study periods, and guided me through making that dress. She even helped tackle the challenge of gathering many layers of heavy silk and jacquard and linings, tapping into every trick she knew to get it to work. (Zig zag stitch over dental floss finally did it.) Then she graded me according to my skill set. I got a 94. Dinged for some less than perfect hand stitching on the hem.

I then put it on and ran over to my favorite science teacher's classroom to show her (I took biology, anatomy and physiology, ap bio, and ap anatomy and physiology from her—huge science nerd here) and she stopped her class so I could get up on a desk and show off my dress.

8 years later... I wore that dress to get married. They were both at my wedding (as well as my 7th and 8th grade English teacher) and singled out as honored guests along with the moms and grandmas as people who were highly influential to me. I will never forget their support and encouragement and dedication to their craft that has inspired me for all my life. I'm 43 now. I was an x-ray tech for 20 years and I still sew regularly."Routine-Register-575


"5th grade teacher, Mrs. W. I doodled and drew a lot as a kid. I’d finish my work, flip the page over, and cover the back with drawings. Most teachers didn’t mind as long as the work was finished, but Mrs. W loved my drawings. I’d recently gotten a 'how to draw dragons' book and kept drawing a specific one over and over to improve. She asked me one day to draw her one on a blank sheet of paper, and after I was finished, asked me to sign it, because, 'You’re going to be a famous artist one day and I want to have a signed copy of one of your original pictures!'

It was such a small thing, but it made me feel really good. She ended up passing away relatively suddenly from cancer when I was a sophomore in college, going to school for 3D art. She was on my mind during the portfolio review at the end of the term. I wished I could’ve shown her some of the art I’d created. She crosses my mind a couple of times a year ever since and I always get teary-eyed thinking about her."soap-bucket

Sponsored

3 organic recipes that feed a family of 4 for under $7 a serving

O Organics is the rare brand that provides high-quality food at affordable prices.

A woman cooking up a nice pot of pasta.

Over the past few years, rising supermarket prices have forced many families to make compromises on ingredient quality when shopping for meals. A recent study published by Supermarket News found that 41% of families with children were more likely to switch to lower-quality groceries to deal with inflation.

By comparison, 29% of people without children have switched to lower-quality groceries to cope with rising prices.

Despite the current rising costs of groceries, O Organics has enabled families to consistently enjoy high-quality, organic meals at affordable prices for nearly two decades. With a focus on great taste and health, O Organics offers an extensive range of options for budget-conscious consumers.

O Organics launched in 2005 with 150 USDA Certified Organic products but now offers over 1,500 items, from organic fresh fruits and vegetables to organic dairy and meats, organic cage-free certified eggs, organic snacks, organic baby food and more. This gives families the ability to make a broader range of recipes featuring organic ingredients than ever before.


“We believe every customer should have access to affordable, organic options that support healthy lifestyles and diverse shopping preferences,” shared Jennifer Saenz, EVP and Chief Merchandising Officer at Albertsons, one of many stores where you can find O Organics products. “Over the years, we have made organic foods more accessible by expanding O Organics to every aisle across our stores, making it possible for health and budget-conscious families to incorporate organic food into every meal.”

With some help from our friends at O Organics, Upworthy looked at the vast array of products available at our local store and created some tasty, affordable and healthy meals.

Here are 3 meals for a family of 4 that cost $7 and under, per serving. (Note: prices may vary by location and are calculated before sales tax.)

O Organic’s Tacos and Refried Beans ($6.41 Per Serving)

Few dishes can make a family rush to the dinner table quite like tacos. Here’s a healthy and affordable way to spice up your family’s Taco Tuesdays.

Prep time: 2 minutes

Cook time: 20 minutes

Total time: 22 minutes

Ingredients:

1 lb of O Organics Grass Fed Ground Beef ($7.99)

1 packet O Organics Taco Seasoning ($2.29)

O Organics Mexican-Style Cheese Blend Cheese ($4.79)

O Organics Chunky Salsa ($3.99)

O Organics Taco Shells ($4.29)

1 can of O Organics Refried Beans ($2.29)

Instructions:

1. Cook the ground beef in a skillet over medium heat until thoroughly browned; remove any excess grease.

2. Add 1 packet of taco seasoning to beef along with water [and cook as directed].

3. Add taco meat to the shell, top with cheese and salsa as desired.

4. Heat refried beans in a saucepan until cooked through, serve alongside tacos, top with cheese.

tacos, o organics, family recipesO Organics Mexican-style blend cheese.via O Organics

O Organics Hamburger Stew ($4.53 Per Serving)

Busy parents will love this recipe that allows them to prep in the morning and then serve a delicious, slow-cooked stew after work.

Prep time: 15 minutes

Cook time: 7 hours

Total time: 7 hours 15 minutes

Servings: 4

Ingredients:

1 lb of O Organics Grass Fed Ground Beef ($7.99)

1 ½ lbs O Organics Gold Potatoes ($4.49)

3 O Organics Carrots ($2.89)

1 tsp onion powder

I can O Organics Tomato Paste ($1.25)

2 cups water

1 yellow onion diced ($1.00)

1 clove garlic ($.50)

1 tsp salt

1/4 tsp pepper

2 tsp Italian seasoning or oregano

Instructions:

1. Cook the ground beef in a skillet over medium heat until thoroughly browned; remove any excess grease.

2. Transfer the cooked beef to a slow cooker with the potatoes, onions, carrots and garlic.

3. Mix the tomato paste, water, salt, pepper, onion powder and Italian seasoning in a separate bowl.

4. Drizzle the mixed sauce over the ingredients in the slow cooker and mix thoroughly.

5. Cover the slow cooker with its lid and set it on low for 7 to 8 hours, or until the potatoes are soft. Dish out into bowls and enjoy!

potatoes, o organics, hamburger stewO Organics baby gold potatoes.via O Organics


O Organics Ground Beef and Pasta Skillet ($4.32 Per Serving)

This one-pan dish is for all Italian lovers who are looking for a saucy, cheesy, and full-flavored comfort dish that takes less than 30 minutes to prepare.

Prep time: 2 minutes

Cook time: 25 minutes

Total time: 27 minutes

Servings: 4

Ingredients:

1 lb of O Organics Grass Fed Ground Beef ($7.99)

1 tbsp. olive oil

2 tsp dried basil

1 tsp garlic powder

1 can O Organics Diced Tomatoes ($2.00)

1 can O Organics Tomato Sauce ($2.29)

1 tbsp O Organics Tomato Paste ($1.25)

2 1/4 cups water

2 cups O Organics Rotini Pasta ($3.29)

1 cup O Organics Mozzarella cheese ($4.79)

Instructions:

1. Brown ground beef in a skillet, breaking it up as it cooks.

2. Sprinkle with salt, pepper and garlic powder

3. Add tomato paste, sauce and diced tomatoes to the skillet. Stir in water and bring to a light boil.

4. Add pasta to the skillet, ensuring it is well coated. Cover and cook for about 10 minutes, stirring occasionally.

5. Remove the lid, sprinkle with cheese and allow it to cool.

o organics, tomato basil pasta sauce, olive oilO Organics tomato basil pasta sauce and extra virgin olive oil.via O Organics

Woman refuses to change seats for mom and kids

Traveling with preteens and teens is a breeze in comparison to traveling with little ones but as a parent you still want to sit near your kiddos in case they need you for anything. If you've traveled on an airline in the last several years, you know it's much cheaper to chose the basic seats in the main cabin.

There's nothing different about these particular seats other than the airline sort of randomly selects your seat and if you're traveling alone, that's really not a bad deal. The risk gets to be a little higher if you're traveling with a party that you'd like to keep together - like your children. One mom took the risk and banked on a stranger accommodating...that's not quite how it played out.


People sit in the wrong seats on planes all the time, usually because they read their ticket wrong or accidentally sit one row ahead. Takes no time to double check your ticket and move along, but when Tammy Nelson did a double take at her ticket after seeing the mom in her window seat, she realized she wasn't mistakenly staring at the wrong row.

This mom boarded the plane with her older children and had taken it upon herself to sit in the same row as her children, essentially commandeering a stranger's seat. Nelson assumed it was a mistake and informed the woman that the seat was in fact hers but the response she received was surprising.

"She said, 'Oh, you want to sit here?'," Nelson tells Good Morning America. "She said, 'Oh, well I just thought I could switch with you because these are my kids.'"

That's an interesting assumption when seats are assigned and many people, like Nelson, pay extra to have the seat they prefer. Now, there's no telling if funds were tight and this was an unplanned trip for the mom and kids which caused her to buy the more budget friendly tickets or if she was simply being frugal and was banking on the kindness of a stranger.

Either way, Nelson specifically paid for a window seat due to motion sickness and though she paid extra, she was willing to sit in the other row if that seat was also a window seat. But it turns out, it was a middle seat.

Surely there's someone out there that loves the middle seat. Maybe a cold natured person that enjoys the body heat of two strangers sitting uncomfortably close. Or perhaps someone that doesn't mind accidentally sleeping on an unsuspecting passenger's shoulder. But that person isn't Nelson, so when the middle seat was offered in exchange for her bought and paid for window seat, she politely but sternly declined.

@myconquering

Having had only 90 minutes of sleep the night before and knowing I had to give a presentation to 500 people, I desperately needed some sleep, so I did not agree to switch seats. 🤷‍♀️ Before anyone comes after me… the kids looked like they were about 11 and 15 years old. And the mom was in arms-reach of both of them from the middle seat in the row behind us. The mom proceeded to complain for at least 15 minutes to the person next to her loud enough for me to hear. But the woman actually defended me – several times. It was so kind and I appreciated it so much because I was feeling really guilty. 🤦‍♀️ ##airplaneseat##seatswitching##airplanekarens

Her refusal to give in to the mom's seemingly entitled request for Nelson's seat has resulted in parents and child-fee people cheering her on after she posted the details on her TikTok page, MyCONQUERing. The video has over 3.4 million views.

"Nope. If it's not an upgrade it's a sacrifice," a commenter writes.

"You did the RIGHT thing. Folks need to plan their travel together. Lack of planning on their part does not constitute an inconvenience on yours," one person says.

"I have 3 kids and have sat in different rows when they were passed toddler age. I agree, book your flight earlier," another writes.

"You were right. As a woman with 3 children, I always pay extra so we're sat together," another mom says.

Nelson is also a mom so she knows how important it is to sit next to kids on flights. But since airlines have made that a luxury, as the parent, you have to plan to pay extra or accept that you likely won't be seated next to your children. Hopefully in the future, this unnamed mom is seated next to her children or pays extra to make sure it happens. In the meantime, people continue to support Nelson standing her ground.

This article originally appeared on 7.28.23

Images provided by P&G

Three winners will be selected to receive $1000 donated to the charity of their choice.

True

Doing good is its own reward, but sometimes recognizing these acts of kindness helps bring even more good into the world. That’s why we’re excited to partner with P&G again on the #ActsOfGood Awards.

The #ActsOfGood Awards recognize individuals who actively support their communities. It could be a rockstar volunteer, an amazing community leader, or someone who shows up for others in special ways.

Do you know someone in your community doing #ActsOfGood? Nominate them between April 24th-June 3rdhere.Three winners will receive $1,000 dedicated to the charity of their choice, plus their story will be highlighted on Upworthy’s social channels. And yes, it’s totally fine to nominate yourself!

We want to see the good work you’re doing and most of all, we want to help you make a difference.

While every good deed is meaningful, winners will be selected based on how well they reflect Upworthy and P&G’s commitment to do #ActsOfGood to help communities grow.

That means be on the lookout for individuals who:

Strengthen their community

Make a tangible and unique impact

Go above and beyond day-to-day work

The #ActsOfGood Awards are just one part of P&G’s larger mission to help communities around the world to grow. For generations, P&G has been a force for growth—making everyday products that people love and trust—while also being a force for good by giving back to the communities where we live, work, and serve consumers. This includes serving over 90,000 people affected by emergencies and disasters through the Tide Loads of Hope mobile laundry program and helping some of the millions of girls who miss school due to a lack of access to period products through the Always #EndPeriodPoverty initiative.

Visit upworthy.com/actsofgood and fill out the nomination form for a chance for you or someone you know to win. It takes less than ten minutes to help someone make an even bigger impact.

via Rachel Lampton/Instagram (used with permission)

Rachel and Spencer Lampton's epic pregnancy announcement.

A new video by Rachel and Spencer Lampton of Minnesota is just a minute long, but it takes the viewer through an intense emotional journey. At first, the couple appears to be headed for divorce because they can’t handle the advantages of living the DINK (double income, no kids) lifestyle.

“Me and Spencer have been married for almost four years now and it’s been so amazing in so many ways,” Rachel says with her tongue firmly planted in cheek. “But recently, it’s gotten pretty difficult.”

The couple admits they just can’t handle having free time for their hobbies, a clean house and excess money in the bank. So they decide they “need a change” that will undermine their happy, stress-free existence. They’re having a kid or, as they call it: “F---ing up our lives in the best way we knew how.”


The funny, well-produced video has won raves with commenters on TikTok and Instagram. “This is an award-winning pregnancy announcement,” one commenter wrote. “This deserves an Oscar,” another added.

“You forgot to mention that you’re tired of getting enough sleep,” a commenter joked.

The couple was inspired to make the announcement video after friends and family members who, instead of encouraging them to have children, warned them about how having one would disrupt their lives. Rachel said their naysayers forced her to “overthink” her plans for the future. But now, they’re ready for a new life with a baby due in December.

The couple hopes that having a child will “Prove the haters wrong. We know we’ll be good parents,” Rachel told Today.com.

via Pixabay

A sad-looking Labrador Retriever

The sweet-faced, loveable Labrador Retriever is no longer America’s favorite dog breed. The breed best known for having a heart of gold has been replaced by the smaller, more urban-friendly French Bulldog.

According to the American Kennel Club, for the past 31 years, the Labrador Retriever was America’s favorite dog, but it was eclipsed in 2022 by the Frenchie. The rankings are based on nearly 716,500 dogs newly registered in 2022, of which about 1 in 7 were Frenchies. Around 108,000 French Bulldogs were recorded in the U.S. in 2022, surpassing Labrador Retrievers by over 21,000.


The French Bulldog’s popularity has grown exponentially over the past decade. They were the #14 most popular breed in 2012, and since then, registrations have gone up 1,000%, bringing them to the top of the breed popularity rankings.

The AKC says that the American Hairless Terrier, Gordon Setter, Italian Greyhound and Anatolian Shepherd Dog also grew in popularity between 2021 and 2022.

The French Bulldog was famous among America’s upper class around the turn of the 20th century but then fell out of favor. Their resurgence is partly based on several celebrities who have gone public with their Frenchie love. Leonardo DiCaprio, Megan Thee Stallion, Alexandra Ocasio-Cortez, Reese Witherspoon and Lady Gaga all own French Bulldogs.

The breed earned a lot of attention as show dogs last year when a Frenchie named Winston took second place at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show and first in the National Dog Show.

The breed made national news in early 2021 when Gaga’s dog walker was shot in the chest while walking two of her Frenchies in a dog heist. He recovered from his injuries, and the dogs were later returned.

They’ve also become popular because of their unique look and personalities.

“They’re comical, friendly, loving little dogs,” French Bull Dog Club of America spokesperson Patty Sosa told the AP. She said they are city-friendly with modest grooming needs and “they offer a lot in a small package.”

They are also popular with people who live in apartments. According to the AKC, Frenchies don’t bark much and do not require a lot of outdoor exercise.

The French Bulldog stands out among other breeds because it looks like a miniature bulldog but has large, expressive bat-like ears that are its trademark feature. However, their popularity isn’t without controversy. “French bulldogs can be a polarizing topic,” veterinarian Dr. Carrie Stefaniak told the AP.

american kennel club, french bulldog, most popular dog

An adorable French Bulldog

via Pixabay

French Bulldogs have been bred to have abnormally large heads, which means that large litters usually need to be delivered by C-section, an expensive procedure that can be dangerous for the mother. They are also prone to multiple health problems, including skin, ear, and eye infections. Their flat face means they often suffer from respiratory problems and heat intolerance.

Frenchies are also more prone to spine deformations and nerve pain as they age.

Here are the AKC’s top ten most popular dog breeds for 2022.

1 French Bulldogs

2 Labrador Retrievers

3 Golden Retrievers

4 German Shepherd Dogs

5 Poodles

6 Bulldogs

7 Rottweilers

8 Beagles

9 Dachshunds

10 German Shorthaired Pointers


This article originally appeared on 03.17.23

A nasty note gets a strong response.

We've all seen it while cruising for spots in a busy parking lot: A person parks their whip in a disabled spot, then they walk out of their car and look totally fine. It's enough to make you want to vomit out of anger, especially because you've been driving around for what feels like a million years trying to find a parking spot.

You're obviously not going to confront them about it because that's all sorts of uncomfortable, so you think of a better, way less ballsy approach: leaving a passive aggressive note on their car's windshield.

Satisfied, you walk back to your car feeling proud of yourself for telling that liar off and even more satisfied as you walk the additional 100 steps to get to the store from your lame parking spot all the way at the back of the lot. But did you ever stop and wonder if you told off the wrong person?



What if that person on the receiving end of the note had a perfectly good explanation for why they're driving car with a disabled sticker and tag?

That's exactly what happened to Emma Doherty, who was surprised to see someone pen such vitriolic words to her in this letter she found on her car.

The language in the note is pretty harsh:

"You lazy conning b-tch. You did not have a disabled person with you! These spaces are reserved for people who need them!!!"

I get that avoiding conflict is something that's been trained into us, but maybe if whoever wrote this note decided to say something to Emma, this entire thing could've been cleared up entirely.

Instead, she had to take to Facebook to pick apart the anonymous grouch and explain her situation to the rest of us. And hopefully whoever wrote the note (if they see her post) understands why they were terribly wrong.

Emma is the mother of a terminally ill child, Bobby. Her ruthless and powerful message sheds light on the misconceptions associated with disabilities and helps to break the stigma that all impairments are visible, because they're not.

"To the person who put this on my car, which I had put my disabled badge fully on, I'm not angry at your pure ignorance, I'm actually upset with it. How dare you ever accuse anyone of not needing a disabled badge without knowing. I wish you had the balls to say this to my face and I would have told you (even tho I don't need to explain myself to the likes of you) but I'd have happily said why I have a badge."

"I promise to get the stigma away from people with disabled badges who don't "look disabled." I hope this gets shared and back to you and you will see my son is terminally ill, he's had over 15 operations, 3 open hearts, 2 stomach, lung and diaphragm and countless artery stenting operations and spent half his life on intensive care."

respect, community, disabilities, visible disability

Emma Doherty and her son Bobby.

SOURCE: FACEBOOK

In her post, she delineates the severity of Bobby's illness, which has put the young man through multiple surgeries and procedures that are no walks in the park.

"He's had 2 strokes and was paralyzed, brain damaged and has a spine and hip condition as well as a massive heart condition. The reason I didn't get his wheelchair out was because I was running late because my son, who had a MRI scan, CTSCAN and a dye for heart function yesterday, only got discharged late and was back in this morning so carried him in."

"But for your information not everyone who holds a blue badge needs to have a wheelchair! I've told ... security and broke down, I've sat through things nobody should see but why did your note break me? Because it's your pure ignorance towards others. I'm a single mom trying my best to hold it together for my son who's in and out if hospital. NOT ALL DISABILITIES ARE VISIBLE and I hope you regret doing this and learn your lesson!”

Throughout her post, Emma simultaneously castigates the person and drives one important point home: Just because someone isn't in a wheelchair or crutches, doesn't mean they aren't disabled or in need of physical care or assistance.

I knew something would be said one day as every day I get looks and stares and see people whispering to each other about me and Bobby walking from the car. Everyone needs to stop and think before acting. I hardly ever let anything upset me but this did. How aggressive as well, and as for conning my son's disabled pass... [It] is not a con, he's actually seriously ill. I've added a picture of him to prove not everyone looks ill or disabled but can be seriously ill.

The mother clarifies at the end of the message that she's sure it wouldn't be a hospital staff member who wrote the message, because those who work in healthcare are well aware of the various reasons someone would have a disabled tag on their vehicle.

"I'd like to point out this has nothing to do with the hospital itself. They were lovely with me when I was upset and they treat us with every respect, always have [in our] 3 long years with them. They've saved my son's life many times. It [was] just somebody who was parked [there].”

Her post quickly went viral, with many people echoing her sentiments and thanking her for helping to clear up that tons of people suffer from different disabilities and that not all of them are so readily apparent.

SOURCE: FACEBOOK

And as it turns out, Emma isn't the only parent who's dealt with judgmental individuals who gave them flack for having a disabled sticker on their car. As if having to deal with a sick child isn't enough, they also have to suffer through getting guff from randos on the street over a measly parking spot.

SOURCE: FACEBOOK

Bobby's condition has left him without pulmonary artery function, which means that blood will not pump throughout his body. As you can imagine, walking long distances — or performing many physical tasks otherwise healthy individuals take for granted — are out of the question for the 3-year-old.

As a result of her son's condition, Emma has to take him to the hospital for treatments throughout the week, and seeing the note on her car while having to deal with that ultimately set her off. Thankfully, she used her anger to send a positive message.

Floored by the positive response to her message, Emma went back online to thank people for being so receptive and helping to spread awareness that disabilities come in many forms.


"My inbox is full of people who have told me they have been stared at or even spat at. This is a serious problem and I just want it to change. I am hoping by sharing what I went through people will start to think before acting."



This article first appeared on 11.26.19.


Gordon Ramsay at play... work.


Gordon Ramsay is not exactly known for being nice.

Or patient.

Or nurturing.

On his competition show "Hell's Kitchen," he belittles cooks who can't keep up. If people come to him with their problems, he berates them. If someone is struggling to get something right in the kitchen, he curses them out.



His whole TV persona is based on being the world's worst boss.

Ramsay went on Reddit and allowed users to ask him any question they wanted.

So when a fellow cook asked him a sincere, deeply personal question about what to do when you've hit a roadblock in your career, you could probably guess what was coming.

economics, inspiration, mentorship

How do you deal with it Ramsay?

Indeed, I thought the guy was making a terrible mistake pouring his heart out to a chef as notoriously tough as Ramsay:

"My hopes and dreams are nowhere to be found as I scale and portion salmon after salmon, shelling pods after pods of broad beans.
...
Sometimes I look out the tiny window and I can see people walking around the streets, enjoying the sunlight, while I'm here, questioning my dedication to this art as I rotate stock in the cool room, getting frost bitten, but the fear of the chef stops me from stepping outside to warm up.
...
The closest thing to feeling any kind of joy I get is those rare moments when I walk through the dining room near the end of service to get some coffee for everyone, and there will be a few diners left, idly sampling those little petite fours that we've painstakingly ensured are all perfectly round, identical, and just plain delicious. Then, one of them will stop the conversation they're having with their company, look up from their food and say, 'Thank you, chef. This is delicious,' and making the previous 14-hours of sweat and tears kind of worthwhile.

My question is, how did you deal with it? How the fuck did you deal with all the bullshit, Gordon?”

But the way Ramsay responded? Totally amazing. And completely unexpected.

uplifting, chef, labor laws

That’s an amazing question.

assets.rebelmouse.io

Turns out, real-life Gordon Ramsay? He actually can be a really kind, big-hearted dude.

He's sympathetic to the guy. Not just because he's a good person. But because he's been there.

Working in restaurants is a tough, tough business. As of 2012, the average salary for cooks was less than $23,000/year. And those who are just starting out often have to work unglamorous, tedious jobs that no one else wants to do. Ramsay didn't have fancy culinary school training. He rose up through the ranks putting in long hours for low pay in kitchens all over the world. That's why he gets it.

Which brings up another point.

Diet Dieting GIF by Bobbi DeCarlo - Find & Share on GIPHY

diners, food, job security, restaurants

(Does this salad dressing have black pepper in it?? No tip for you!)

Diet Dieting GIF by Bobbi DeCarlo - from GIPHY.

When we go out to eat, we, as a culture, tend to behave ... how should I put this?

Let's go with "not like perfect angels."

Of course, no one likes getting the wrong order. Or waiting a really long time for a meal. Or eating something that doesn't taste the way you expect it to.

But it's important to remember that the people behind the food, like Ramsay's anonymous letter-writer, might be working 14-hour days. Or might be a recent immigrant who speaks limited English, trying to support a family thousands of miles away. And possibly making very little money. And sure, they screw up sometimes. But we all screw up at our jobs sometimes.

Because they, like the rest of us, are human beings.

Which is why saying...

"Thank you, chef. This is delicious."

Could mean everything to someone.


This article originally appeared on 04.22.15