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3 important things to remember when talking about terrorism, guns, and free speech.

Yesterday marked the one-year anniversary of the shooting at the Charlie Hebdo office in Paris.

In 2015 two men walked into the offices of the French satirical magazine and opened fire, killing 12 people. The tragedy sparked an international period of mourning and an inundation of the slogan "Je suis Charlie" meaning "I am Charlie."


"Je suis Charlie" spray painted onto a Paris street. Photo by Joel Sagat/AFP/Getty Images.

The magazine was attacked for publishing several controversial depictions of the prophet Mohammad over the years, including one on the cover in 2011.

While it's been a year since the tragedy at Charlie Hebdo, it's only been two months since the terrorist attack that killed 130 people in the same city.

Here in America, it's been a little over three years since 27 people were killed at a school in Newtown, Connecticut, but it's only been six weeks since the Colorado Springs shooting that killed three, and less than 40 days since the shooting that killed 14 in San Bernardino, California.

The point I'm approaching here really isn't a new one. I'm not the first to point out that it often feels like we're living in a mad world where every week our phones light up with a news notification about gun violence or terrorism. They're becoming ubiquitous.

Don't worry, this isn't going to be just another, "Hey, we should do something about this" article. We should ... but there are enough of those.

Instead, let's look at how we think about these events.

Terrorism, gun violence, and the consequences of free speech aren't simple problems. We shouldn't talk about them as if they have simple solutions.

While politicians and media make it seem as though standing on one side of an issue means disparaging anyone who disagrees with you, most people fall somewhere more in the middle. And many people feel that they can't say how they feel without being attacked or having assumptions made about their character.

It happens on both sides of every issue.

President Obama addressed many of the complexities of gun violence at a town hall on Jan. 7, 2015. Photo by Aude Guerrucci-Pool/Getty Images

As we move forward, let's face the fact that simple, one-sided, un-evolved opinions don't really solve problems. We all have to apply a little more brain power to our world views and start recognizing some dualities and nuance.

It may not be easy, but here are three simple places to start:

1. You can hate terrorism without being Islamophobic.

Terrorism is undoubtedly terrifying. That's why it's called terror-ism.

And it's OK to be afraid of it. It's OK for you to want your country to do everything in its power prevent tragedies like 9/11 or San Bernardino from ever happening again. Lately though, being anti-terrorism has started to get confusing, as more and more people insist on equating terrorism with Muslims.

In America at least, a lot of people are scoring major points for simply equating the religion of Islam with terrorism. Not just presidential candidates with weird hair either.

Liberal champion Bill Maher has recently come under fire for his comments about Muslims. Saying things like,"For the last 30 years, it's been one culture that has been been blowing s--t up over and over again."

Comedian Bill Maher speaking in 2011. Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images.

The fact is Islamophobia and terrorism aren't things we can properly address with talk show one-liners.

There are over 1 billion Muslims in the world. To suggest they all have a hand in terrorism is morally and mathematically ridiculous and to recommend that starving, desperate refugees be banned from the United States because of their religion is not only silly but dangerous.

Especially since (and I can't believe I have to say this) terrorism isn't inherently Muslim. If it was, you would think Indonesia — the most Muslim country in the world — would be a breeding ground for extremism. It isn't. Not to mention, studies have shown that white supremacists, antigovernment fanatics and other non-Muslim extremists are responsible for a lot more terror in America than Islamic extremism.

Furthermore, treating Muslims as individuals who aren't terrorists by nature should not be seen as a sign of weakness or an inability to lead. It should be seen as the viewpoint of an adult who recognizes that people are individuals.

Everyone hates terrorism. It doesn't mean you have to hate 1.6 billion people.

2. You can be pro guns AND pro gun-control.

Chances are, if you're a gun owner, you already do support gun control. 85% of gun owners support universal background checks, which makes sense because responsible gun owners wouldn't be affected by them at all.

Once again, we have a problem that is complex and multifaceted but is only being publicly addressed through simplified rhetoric.

You're either "pro-guns," meaning you want guns in everyone's hands all the time every day, or you're "anti-guns," meaning you want to round up everyone's guns and throw them into a big fire along with the Constitution.

At least that's how the debate is broken down in the media. The issue of gun violence is, if you can believe it, (say it with me) not that simple.

Supporting tighter restrictions on guns doesn't mean you despise the Second Amendment, and being a gun owner doesn't mean you despise gun control. It also doesn't mean you're a redneck doomsday prepper or that you're not a responsible person.

New York Senator Charles Schumer with a delegation of gun owners who support common sense gun laws. Photo by Larry French/Getty Images for MoveOn.org

In France, where the attack on Charlie Hebdo and the attack at the Bataclan theater happened just last year, it's estimated that civilians hold 19 million guns — putting the country in fifth place globally for gun ownership. France also has restrictive gun control laws and about one-eighteenth of the gun homicides that we have in America. (Roughly 1,856 in 2012 versus America's 33,563 in the same year.)

People can own guns responsibly and accept restrictions on their ability to do so. France knows that. Essentially, the entire modern world knows that. Deep down, you probably know it too.

3. You can support free speech and also find things offensive.

The Charlie Hebdo attack was, at its core, an attack on free speech.

Whether or not the 2011 cover photo was offensive, funny, provocative, Islamophobic, satirical, or all of the above is certainly a debate worth having. In fact, it's probably the debate that the Charlie Hebdo staff was trying to have when they published it.

Instead, they were killed for it, and we never got that debate. An open door was slammed shut.

The Charlie Hebdo cover marking the first anniversary of the attack. Photo by Martin Bureau/AFP/Getty Images.

In America, where free speech is written into our constitution, the attack raised a lot of questions about what it means and spurned many discussions regarding what you "can" and "can't" say, do, joke about, write about, or draw a picture of. It also raised a lot of questions about what you "should" and "shouldn't" be offended by and what you "should" or "shouldn't" do if something you've done has offended someone.

The problem is, those are hard lines. As soon as you draw them, the ability to have an open discussion about the issue (aka the most important part of solving a problem) gets lost.

It's a big world out there. People are going to say things you disagree with. That's OK. You may find yourself offended by the words of another person. That's OK too.

Freedom of speech is not freedom from disagreement or consequence. That being said, we all want to live in a world where death is never one of those consequences.

In theory, freedom of speech should look like this: A person says something. Someone else says, "That offends me for the following reasons." They can then get together and discuss it. See how that works? Also, did you notice the part where no one killed anybody?

But we don't live in that America, do we? We live in the one where your ideas are right, the others are wrong, and you better set up your fortress quick because the other side is coming to tear down everything you believe in.

In politics, especially, rhetoric has become more and more extreme to the point where itactually can cost people their lives.

Take the attack at the Planned Parenthood in Colorado Springs, where three people were killed by a lone gunman who reportedly told police, "no more baby parts," after he was arrested.

Many have drawn a connection from the violence perpetrated against Planned Parenthood (and other women's health facilities) to the inflammatory rhetoric used by the anti-abortion movement, which has been adopted by many presidential candidates and politicians who want to defund Planned Parenthood and restrict abortion access.

Planned Parenthood, as well as other abortion providers, have seen a sharp increase in violence over the past year. Photo by Andrew Burton/Getty Images.

Vicki Cowart, president of Planned Parenthood of the Rocky Mountains said in her statement following the attack: "We’ve seen an alarming increase in hateful rhetoric and smear campaigns against abortion providers and patients over the last few months. That environment breeds acts of violence."

See, it's not the ideas themselves that get people killed. It's the extremity with which they're presented and the inability or refusal to listen to or respect any other ideas.

When discourse goes away, beliefs get extreme, and when beliefs get extreme, they can become dangerous.

You can fundamentally disagree with someone without wanting to censor them. They can tell you not to be offended by it, but you can use your free speech to tell them why it's offensive. At the same time, you can also be offended by a cartoon without needing to kill the person who drew it.

These points shouldn't sound complicated. They're not.

You probably fall into one of these grey areas yourself. That's good. It's good when things aren't binary.

Progress happens when we recognize the fact that problems of this scale aren't simple and static, but they need to be changed through understanding and compromise.

From now on, instead of buying into the constant barrage of "this" versus "that" rhetoric, we should embrace the nuance. It's where the progress is hiding.

In the year since Charlie Hebdo, we've only gotten more divided.

Let's stop thinking of everything in terms of "sides." Pro-guns versus anti-guns, pro-refugees versus anti-Islam, Republican versus Democrat. Those boxes we put ourselves in aren't real. They're comfortable and they're easier, but they aren't always helpful.

Fewer people should die tragically. That's the only side worth taking, and it's the one we're all on.

That's a good place to start.

True

Been stressed this week? Who hasn’t. That’s why we’re bringing you the latest in good news—five animal-themed stories we guarantee will put a smile on your face.

This week, we’re celebrating:

The most entertaining animal photos you've ever seen

Jason Moore/Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards 2023 and © Tzahi Finkelstein /Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards 2023

Need a laugh? How about a dozen laughs? Look no further than the 2023 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards, a competition started in 2015 that focuses on the lighter side of wildlife photography. More than 1,800 photographers from around the world submitted photos, and the finalists—from a kangaroo playing air guitar to an arguing set of greenfinches—will absolutely make your day.

Healthier, happier, rescued pets

Hundreds of thousands of pets are relinquished to shelters each year, and many vulnerable pet populations—such as disabled and elderly dogs—can be hard to place in loving homes. Fortunately, Subaru has sponsored the rescue, rehabilitation, and adoption of more than 134,000 of these pets through the Subaru Share the Love® Event. As the largest corporate donor to the ASPCA® (The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals®), Subaru and its retailers are donating a minimum of $300 to charities like the ASPCA for every new Subaru purchase or lease during the 2024 Subaru Share the Love Event, happening now through January 2, 2025.

This animal-centric (and adorable) creative writing assignment 

Amy McKinney, a third-grade teacher in Pennsylvania, recently had a genius idea for teaching her class persuasive writing: Rather than have them formulate an argument for an imagined audience (boring!), McKinney partnered with a local animal shelter and had her class write persuasive descriptions of each animal to help them get adopted. Each student chose a pet to write about and sent their essays to the shelter to display and post to the shelter’s social media channels. Student engagement was “tremendous,” said McKinney, and there’s no doubt these persuasive paragraphs made a huge difference in these shelter pet’s lives. Adorable.

The dog who saved his owner with CPR (yes, really)

Dogs have made the news for saving humans before, but have you ever heard of a dog performing CPR? That’s exactly what Bear, a Siberian Husky-Golden Retriever mix, did in 2022 when he found his owner unconscious on the floor after suffering a major heart attack. Not only was Bear able to quickly call for help, he even jumped on his owner’s chest repeatedly while someone else called the paramedics. Thanks to Bear, the owner survived what should have been a fatal heart attack. Now that deserves some head scritches.

Bee populations have reached a record high

macro shot photography of beePhoto by Jenna Lee on Unsplash

Honeybees are essential to the planet, as they pollinate over 130 types of fruits, vegetables, and nuts. For years, honeybee numbers have been in decline—but happily, that’s starting to change. The US has added almost a million bee colonies in the past five years, with more than 3.8 million honeybees in total.

For more ways to smile, check out how Subaru is sharing the love this holiday season.

via Pixabay

When parents can't step up, should grandparents step in?

A story that recently went viral on Reddit’s AITA forum asks an important question: What is a parent’s role in taking care of their grandchildren? The story is even further complicated because the woman at the center of the controversy is a stepparent.

At the time of writing her post, the woman, 38, met her husband Sam, 47, ten years ago, when his daughter, Leah, 25, was 15. The couple married five years ago after Leah had moved out to go to college.

Leah’s mom passed away when she was 10.

When Leah became pregnant she wanted to keep the baby, but her boyfriend didn’t. After the disagreement, the boyfriend broke up with her. This forced Leah to move back home because she couldn’t afford to be a single parent and live alone on a teacher’s salary.


Leah’s story is familiar to many young mothers facing similar difficulties.

The father isn’t involved in the baby’s life as a caretaker or financially. Sadly, research shows that 33% of all children in the U.S. are born without their biological fathers living in the home.

a young mother holds her baby

Single motherhood comes with unique hardships.

via Alexander Grey/Unsplash

The new mother is a teacher and can’t afford to live on her own with a child. In 2019, a study found that out the top 50 U.S. cities, Pittsburgh is the only one where a new teacher could afford rent.

Today, Portland, OR has joined the very short list of cities where an "average teacher can afford 91.3% of apartments within community distance of their school" according to a recent study.

The stressors of taking care of the baby made Leah realize she needed help.

“But once she had the baby around 4 months back, Leah seemed to realize having a baby is not the sunshine and rainbows she thought it was,” the woman wrote on Reddit. “She barely got any sleep during the last four months. All the while Sam was helping her with the baby while I did almost all chores myself.”

“Now her leave is ending. She did not want to leave the baby at daycare or with a nanny,” the woman continued. “Sam and I both work as well.”

Leah asked her stepmother if she would stay home with the baby. The stepmother said no because she never wanted to have a baby and she has a job. “I asked why Leah can't stay home with the baby herself,” the woman wrote. “She said how she was young and had to build a career. I said many people take breaks to raise kids, and she broke down crying about how she was so tired all the time being a mom and needed something else in her life too.”

A woman holds a newborn baby.

The demands of new motherhood are usually all-encompassing.

via Pixabay

After the woman told her stepdaughter no, her husband pressured her to stay home with the baby. But she refused to give up her job to raise her stepdaughter’s child. “Leah said yesterday how she wished her mom was alive since she would have had her back. She said I didn't love her, and my husband is also mad at me,” the woman wrote. The woman asked the Reddit community if she was in the wrong for “refusing to help my stepdaughter with the baby,” and the community responded with rapturous support.

"[The woman] should tell her husband to knock it off and stop trying to pressure her into raising his daughter’s baby. If he wants a family member to look after her baby while she works, then he can do it," user Heavy_Sand5228 wrote.

"This is Leah's baby that she alone chose to have. That doesn't obligate you to change YOUR life to suit her desires. The whole business of saying you don't love her because you won't quit your job to watch her baby is manipulative and messed up, and I'm shocked your husband is siding with her," user SupremeCourtJust-a** added.

Leah and many women like her are in this situation because, in many places, teachers are underpaid, rent is high, and not all dads pay child support, even those required by law.

Another commenter noted that the baby is much more the father’s responsibility than the stepmother's. "To add, Leah should consider seeking child support from her ex. Her kid should be getting that money," Obiterdicta wrote.

While there are resources to help stepparents connect with their stepchildren and step-grandchildren, it's important to remember that the responsibility to raise a child ultimately rests with the parent(s).

This article originally appeared last year.

Julie McFadden and former President Jimmy Carter.

Former President Jimmy Carter is known for being one of the most beloved former presidents in American history for his resolve to use his talents to help others, whether it was eradicating the Guinea worm or his work with Habitat for Humanity into his late 90s. Carter says that his faith is the big reason for his resilience. “I have one life and one chance to make it count for something,” he said. “My faith demands that I do whatever I can, wherever I am, whenever I can, for as long as I can with whatever I have to try to make a difference.”

The man who held the presidency from 1977 to 1981 went into hospice in February 2023 but has lived much longer than most expected. Carter has made 2 public appearances in that time, the first in November 2023 for the funeral of his wife of 77 years, Rosalynn and on October 1, 2024 for his 100th birthday. When Carter was wheeled into his wife’s funeral, some family members expressed shock and worry about Cartter’s appearance.

Since beginning hospice care, Carter has appeared frail and gaunt without expression and mouth agape. It shouldn’t be shocking for a person who has reached the age of 100 to appear so fragile, but it’s right to be concerned that he may be uncomfortable in such a state. However, Julie McFadden, also known as Hospice Nurse Julie, settled a lot of people’s fears in a TikTok video where she explained Carter’s appearance and why he’s most likely comfortable during his transition.

McFadden has assisted over a hundred people in their final days and is the author of the bestseller, "Nothing to Fear."

@hospicenursejulie

#greenscreenvideo #greenscreen Jimmy Carters 100th birthday! #hospicenursejulie #hospicenurse #jimmycarter #education

What is Jimmy Carter's condition?

“I have been tagged in this Jimmy Carter turns 100 years old today video,” she begins her viral TikTok with over 600,00 views. “So many times people asking me, why does he look like this? Is he okay? Does this mean anything? As a hospice nurse, this video was not alarming to me. Jimmy Carter, to me, looks just like someone who was 100 years old on hospice and getting towards the end of their life.”

She then speculated on what his life is like at age 100. “Jimmy Carter is likely sleeping 20 to 22 hours a day. He is likely not really eating and drinking, which is all normal and to be expected at the end of life. So that's why he looks so thin. He looks cachectic. His body is slowly shutting down and the more we just let his body be the guide, the better he will be.”

A lot of people are concerned about the way that Carter’s mouth seems to be permanently open. McFadden says that is due to muscle wasting. “His mouth is hanging open because it takes muscles to keep your mouth shut. And at the end of life, those muscles relax. So he is likely so relaxed that when he's sleeping, which is most of the time, even when he's in a wheelchair, he's asleep, and his muscles relax, so his mouth hangs open.”



McFadden also addressed many people's concerns: Should Carter have been brought outside to celebrate his birthday with his family in such an advanced state? Should he have been in front of the cameras?

“In my opinion, it's up to the family. The family knows that person best,” McFadden said. “From what we know of Jimmy Carter, he was a family man who loved being around his family. So why not be around him and celebrate his one hundred? One-hundredth birthday and bring family around, bring him outside. They know his personality. They must think he would love this. So let's do it. We don't have to keep dying people hidden away.”

McFadden is such an incredible gift because we tend to lock away the dying and talking about death and hospice is a very uncomfortable topic for most. This lack of information leads us to believe that someone in Carter’s position suffers. But, according to McFadden, he’s probably comfortable and relaxed. McFadden knows that when people better understand Carter’s condition, they will probably feel better about their final days as well.


Fowl Language by Brian Gordon

Brian Gordon is a cartoonist. He's also a dad, which means he's got plenty of inspiration for the parenting comics he creates for his website, Fowl Language (not all of which actually feature profanity). He covers many topics, but it's his hilarious parenting comics that are resonating with parents everywhere.

"My comics are largely autobiographical," Gordon tells me. "I've got two kids who are 4 and 7, and often, what I'm writing happened as recently as that very same day."

Gordon shared 15 of his oh-so-real comics with us. They're all funny 'cause they're true.

Let's get started with his favorite, "Welcome to Parenting," which Gordon says sums up his comics pretty well. "Parenting can be such tedious drudgery," he says, "but if it wasn't also so incredibly rewarding there wouldn't be nearly so many people on the planet."

Truth.

I hope you enjoy these as much as I did.

1.

parenting, comics, humor

“Welcome to parenting."

via Fowl Language

All comics are shared here with Gordon's express permission. These comics are all posted on his website, in addition to his Facebook page. You can also find a "bonus" comic that goes with each one by clicking the "bonus" link. Original. Bonus.

2.

food allergies, fussy, picky eaters

Eating is never fundamental.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

3.

sleep deprivation, children, isolation

Adjusting the coping mechanism.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

4.

ducks, birds, fowl

I used to be cool.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

5.

naps, popcorn, movies

Naps happen.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

6.

politics, advice, education

Rolling with the punches.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

7.

emotions, therapy, emotional maturity

Tears happen.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

8.

insomnia, sleep deprivation, kids

It’s time to get up.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

9.

psychology, toddlers, family

The benefits of experience.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

10.

babies, diapers, responsibility

Is it gas?

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

11.

sociology, grief counseling, dads

Everyone gets therapy, yea.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

12.

moms, dress up, costumes

Everyone has a role to play.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

13.

doctor, medicine, pediatrics

What’s up doc?

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

14.

sports, competition, aggression

Everyone gets a participation ribbon.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

15.

theatrics, advice, Dan Gordon

Perception shifts.

via Fowl Language

Original. Bonus.

I love Gordon's comics so much because they're just about the reality of parenting — and they capture it perfectly.

There's no parenting advice, no judgment, just some humor about the common day-to-day realities that we all share.

When I ask him about the worst parenting advice he's ever received, Gordon relays this anecdote:

"I remember being an absolute sleep-deprived wreck, sitting outside a sandwich shop, wolfing down my lunch quickly beside my 1-month-old son, who was briefly resting his lungs between screaming fits.

A rather nosy woman walked up to me and said, all smugly, 'You should enjoy this time while they're easy.' It was the exact worst thing anyone could have said to me in that moment and I just wanted to curl up on the sidewalk and cry."

Who hasn't been on the receiving end of totally unneeded and unwanted advice? That's why Gordon's comics are so welcome: They offer up a space for us to all laugh about the common experiences we parents share.

Here's to Gordon for helping us chuckle (through the tears).


This article originally appeared eight years ago.

Community

Family finds surprise gift on mom's memorial bench after leaving balls of yarn as a tribute

"I just hope this is a reminder to everyone that the simplest act of kindness from you can completely brighten a stranger’s day."

Family finds surprise gift on mom's grave after leaving yarn tribute

Losing a loved one is difficult. It feels exceptionally more difficult when the person you've lost is your parent but you do what you can to keep their memory alive. Everyone has their own way of doing this. It could be that they've planted a tree to put their ashes around or they wear their loved one's favorite sweater on rough days.

There's no right or wrong way of paying tribute to someone that has passed as it's usually a personal decision. When Robin Epley, a writer for the Sacramento Bee lost her mother Cynthia in 2019, she and her father went with a bench design for her grave marker so they could sit with her. The bench is made of stone with her mother's picture emblazoned on the front.

On a more recent visit to the memorial bench, the pair decided to leave balls of yarn as a tribute since the mom was an avid crocheter, teaching Robin the craft at just six years old. The small act of remembrance was just that, a tiny gesture that meant something that a passerby may not understand. After leaving, the pair didn't think much of it until they returned for another visit only to find a surprise waiting for them on that very bench.

pink and green flower bouquet on brown concrete wall Photo by Caroline Attwood on Unsplash

Someone had taken the yarn and knitted a scarf out of it, draping it over the area of the bench that displayed Cynthia's name. There was no note left with the handmade gift. Just a scarf created by someone that decided to turn a family's tribute into a piece of wearable love and a couple of bouquets of flowers.

Robin shared a photo of the bench with the knitted scarf visible on X, explaining how the scarf got there, writing, "im sobbing: My mom was a big crocheter, so on her bench at East Lawn, my dad and I left one of her balls of yarn as a tribute. He just went back today after a few weeks to tend to the site, and someone had used the yarn to knit mom a scarf."


People were moved by the act of kindness by a stranger with some even suggesting possible culprits to the artistic endeavor, one of which caught Robin's attention. In a follow up comment, the grieving daughter writes, "I don’t know who did it, though someone has suggested it was the wonderful staff or volunteers at @EastLawnSac, a group which my mom was a part of. I just hope this is a reminder to everyone that the simplest act of kindness from you can completely brighten a stranger’s day."

Others chimed in to share their own stories of loss and ways of coping, while also admiring what this anonymous knitter did for the family of Cynthia.


One person writes, "Oh that is so special. I wear the joggers my mom wore the last time I saw her. I remember she had them on backwards because I could see the pockets. She laughed her familiar laugh for me one last time. That was two years ago. It's getting easier. Thanks for sharing."

Someone else gives their guess on who might have done such a kind gesture, "This is so sweet. I know there are a lot of regular visitors and volunteers who like to care for the memorials, but my money is on a staff member having done this. The staff and leadership at East Lawn are very special people."

Cry Hug GIF by HollyoaksGiphy

Robin and her dad may never find out who made the scarf using the yarn they left behind, but that act of kindness will stay with them both for years to come, and Cynthia would approve.

"Knowing someone out there who didn’t even know my mom cared enough to do this has me in total shambles. honestly, it’s totally something my mom would have done for someone else, karma is real," Robin says in response to another commenter.

It doesn't always take a lot to be kind to others but it can turn someone's day around. Sometimes people just need a reminder that someone out there cares, even if it doesn't always feel that way. Acts of kindness can go a long way.

Culture

Woman stands for entire 7-hour flight and sparks massive debate on airplane etiquette

Passengers were annoyed, but commenters had some empathetic theories.

envisionaries/TikTok & Leo McLaren/Unsplash

People just can't stop finding new ways to drive each other crazy on airplanes. Whether it's using kids as an excuse to try to switch seats, eating smelly food, standing and block the aisles immediately after landing, or having phone calls on speakerphone, airplanes have become hotbeds of bad behavior. The unique cocktail of travel stress, cramped spaces, alcohol, and altitude seems to have a big effect on our judgment for some reason.

One passenger recently went viral for some interesting behavior during a long flight. And let's just say, her fellow passengers couldn't stand it.

Richard Duong posted a video on TikTok of a passenger several rows ahead of him on a flight. The caption: "Lady stood on my flight the ENTIRE 7 hour duration watching her movie."

Although the video is short, it definitely backs up his claim. Through several clips stitched together, we see a blonde woman standing in the aisle staring at her back-of-seat screen. Lights on? She's standing there. Lights go off? Still standing there.

Duong mentioned in a comment that she did return to her seat when the pilot turned on the seatbelt light, but otherwise, she was standing the entire time.

He also mentioned that passengers on the flight were definitely annoyed. People asking to squeeze by to get to the bathroom, and even the flight attendants trying to serve drinks, were less than thrilled that she was blocking the aisle for so long.

I can imagine it made the passengers around her uneasy, too. Have you ever sensed someone standing over you and felt a sort of unexplainable anxiety? It must have driven the people seated near this woman absolutely bonkers!

We've heard of people having too much to drink or taking their socks off during a flight, but standing the entire time has to be a new one.

@envisionaries

#onthisday


Commenters on the video — unlike some passengers on the flight — had a lot of empathy for the mysterious standing woman.

Apparently, there are a lot of reasons someone might want to stand for *checks notes* seven hours straight.

Some people suggested the woman had a clotting disorder and couldn't sit down for long.

Others speculated about back issues like sciatica, a broken tailbone, severe motion sickness, a herniated disc, or fibromyalgia. Someone said the woman probably had restless leg syndrome.

interior of an airplane with seats and movie screensAlev Takil/Unsplash

The theories just kept coming — to date, the video has racked up nearly a million views and 800 comments.

Duong, who posted the video, probably had the most likely explanation: "I thought she was standing just to stand."

It's true — some people just like to stand! Maybe they read an article about the dangers of sitting and leading a sedentary lifestyle, or maybe it just feels good and relaxes them. The mystery woman could very well have restless legs or a back injury, but maybe she just felt like standing except when she was specifically told not to.

What I loved about the response to Duong's video was the outpouring of empathy. People were really willing, and even eager, to excuse the woman's admittedly pretty obnoxious behavior by justifying it with a medical reason.

It was honestly really refreshing to read the incredibly laundry list of possible medical conditions that could make someone want to stand for an entire flight. We're often so quick to assume the worst in people — that mom trying to switch seats with her kid is just trying to take advantage, people who stand up right away after landing are just being jerks, etc. It's rare that we stop to think and realize that we don't know their story, their medical history, what happened to them earlier that day, what they're really like as a person.

In a follow up video, Duong clarified: "Yes she would get out of the way (for passengers and crew), she was very polite, no fuss or anything, but it did impact the flight."

"The video was not meant to be mean or judgmental. The video was never about her as a person. It was a funny, unexpected event. A woman standing on a flight for seven hours, you don't see that every day."