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31 celebrities who smashed the stigma surrounding mental illness in 2016.

"Like a dandelion up through the pavement, I persist."

It may not seem like that big of a deal when a celebrity speaks up about their experiences with mental illness. But it is.

Throughout 2016, dozens of actors, authors, artists, and athletes — trailblazers we're used to seeing smiling on red carpets or snagging gold medals on TV — shared the personal battles they've faced behind closed doors. It was a groundbreaking year.

“It levels the playing field," Aaron Harvey says of the many public figures who chose to speak up. Harvey is the founder of Intrusive Thoughts, a group set on humanizing those living with mental illness. “Suddenly, you realize the same struggles that you have might be the same struggles that someone you really idolize have. And that [makes it] OK."


The stigma surrounding mental illness is taking lives. Many millions of people living with conditions like depression and anxiety are shamed into believing there's something inherently wrong with them — that they're weak, for instance, or even dangerous to others. They suffer in silence because of it.

When a person with a platform becomes a face others can relate to, it becomes a little bit easier for someone else to follow in their footsteps, talk to someone, and get the help they need. Speaking up can save a life.

Here are 31 celebrities who spoke out in 2016 — some of them for the first time — about their experiences living with a mental illness:

1. Actress Kristen Bell wrote about why you can't trust all of your thoughts when you're battling depression.

Photo by Valerie Macon/AFP/Getty Images.

"For me, depression is not sadness. It’s not having a bad day and needing a hug. It gave me a complete and utter sense of isolation and loneliness. Its debilitation was all-consuming, and it shut down my mental circuit board. I felt worthless, like I had nothing to offer, like I was a failure. Now, after seeking help, I can see that those thoughts, of course, couldn’t have been more wrong." — Kristen Bell, on living with depression

2. Singer Selena Gomez reminded us that you never really know what's going on in someone else's head.

Photo by Valerie Macon/AFP/Getty Images.

"I had to stop. 'Cause I had everything, and I was absolutely broken inside. And I kept it all together enough to where I would never let you down, but I kept it too much together, to where I let myself down. I don't want to see your bodies on Instagram, I want to see what's in here. [puts hand on heart] I'm not trying to get validation, nor do I need it anymore. ... If you are broken, you don’t have to stay broken." — Selena Gomez, on living with anxiety and depression

3. Musical artist Kid Cudi got candid about the limitations that living with a mental illness put on his own life.

Photo by Michael Hickey/Getty Images.

"My anxiety and depression have ruled my life for as long as I can remember and I never leave the house because of it. I can't make new friends because of it. I don't trust anyone because of it and Im tired of being held back in my life. I deserve to have peace. I deserve to be happy and smiling. Why not me?" — Kid Cudi, on living with anxiety and depression

4. Actor Wentworth Miller opened up about becoming the butt of a body-shaming joke amid his struggle to survive.

Photo by Angela Weiss/Getty Images.

"Now, when I see that image of me in my red t-shirt, a rare smile on my face, I am reminded of my struggle. My endurance and my perseverance in the face of all kinds of demons. Some within. Some without. Like a dandelion up through the pavement, I persist." — Wentworth Miller, on living with depression

5. Actress Hayden Panettiere shared with fans that they might be seeing less of her because, first and foremost, she needed to prioritize getting well.

Photo by Mark Ralston/AFP/Getty Images.

“The postpartum depression I have been experiencing has impacted every aspect of my life. Rather than stay stuck due to unhealthy coping mechanisms, I have chosen to take time to reflect holistically on my health and life. Wish me luck!" — Hayden Panettiere, on living with postpartum depression

6. Singer Zayn Malik penned an essay on why he had to cancel performances due to severe anxiety.

Photo by Willy Sanjuan/Invision/AP.

"The thing is, I love performing. I love the buzz. I don’t want to do any other job. That’s why my anxiety is so upsetting and difficult to explain. It’s this thing that swells up and blocks out your rational thought processes. Even when you know you want to do something, know that it will be good for you, that you’ll enjoy it when you’re doing it, the anxiety is telling you a different story. It’s a constant battle within yourself." — Zayn Malik, on living with anxiety

7. Artist Lady Gaga revealed a secret about her own battles at an event benefitting young homeless teens in New York.

Photo by Stuart C. Wilson/Getty Images.

"My own trauma in my life has helped me to understand the trauma of others. I told the kids today that I suffer from a mental illness. I suffer from PTSD. I've never told that to anyone before, so here we are." — Lady Gaga, on living with post-traumatic stress disorder

8. NFL wide receiver Brandon Marshall explained why organizing with one another — not hiding away — is crucial for those living with a mental illness.

Photo by Julio Cortez/AP.

“I thought, ‘How many others are out there suffering?’ I tell people all the time, you know, where we’re at in [the mental health] community is where the cancer and HIV community was 20, 25 years ago. So we have to galvanize this community.” — Brandon Marshall, on living with borderline personality disorder

9. Actress Rachel Bloom showed us why we shouldn't let stereotypes about medication dictate whether we should get the proper help we need.

Photo by Christopher Polk/Getty Images for The Critics' Choice Awards.

"I had gone to therapists, but for the first time I sought out a psychiatrist. In his office I finally felt safe. I told him everything. Each session improved my life. He diagnosed me with low-grade depression and put me on a small amount of Prozac. There’s a stereotype (I had believed) that antidepressants numb you out; that didn’t happen to me." — Rachel Bloom, on living with depression

10. Musical artist Justin Vernon of Bon Iver got real about what a panic attack can actually feel like.

Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images.

“It was like: ‘Oh my god, my chest is caving in, what the f**k is going on?’ I don’t like talking about it, but I feel it’s important to talk about it, so that other people who experience it don’t feel it’s just happening to them.” — Justin Vernon, on living with panic attacks and depression

11. Singer Demi Lovato pointed out the importance of consistently staying on top of your health for the long haul.

Photo by Valerie Macon/AFP/Getty Images.

"It’s not something where you see a therapist once or you see your psychiatrist once, it’s something you maintain to make sure that you want to live with mental illness. You have to take care of yourself.” — Demi Lovato, on living with bipolar disorder

12. Actress Lena Dunham opened up about how anxiety affects her day-to-day routines.

Photo by Emma McIntyre/Getty Images.

“I’ve always been anxious, but I haven’t been the kind of anxious that makes you run 10 miles a day and make a lot of calls on your BlackBerry. I’m the kind of anxious that makes you like, ‘I’m not going to be able to come out tonight, tomorrow night, or maybe for the next 67 nights.’” — Lena Dunham, on living with anxiety

13. NFL guard Brandon Brooks discussed the difference between game-day jitters and the type of anxiety he experiences.

Photo by Greg Trott/AP.

“I wanted to get to the bottom of what’s going on. Basically, I found out recently that I have an anxiety condition. What I mean by anxiety condition [is] not nervousness or fear of the game. ... I have, like, an obsession with the game. It’s an unhealthy obsession right now and I’m working with team doctors to get everything straightened out and getting the help that I need and things like that.” — Brandon Brooks, on living with anxiety

14. Actress Evan Rachel Wood spoke out about how our world's tendency to overlook or dismiss certain groups can complicate a person's mental health.

Photo by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images.

"For so long, I was ashamed. You’re dealing with the shame that the world has imposed upon you, and then on top of that, the shame of identifying that way. You’re totally looked down upon in and out of the LGBT community. A good way to combat that and the stereotypes is to be vocal." — Evan Rachel Wood, on living with depression and coming out as bisexual

15. Actress Cara Delevingne got real about her early struggles living with a sense of hopelessness.

Photo by Valerie Macon/AFP/Getty Images.

"I'm very good at repressing emotion and seeming fine. As a kid I felt like I had to be good and I had to be strong because my mum wasn't. So, when it got to being a teenager and all the hormones and the pressure and wanting to do well at school — for my parents, not for me — I had a mental breakdown. I was suicidal. I couldn't deal with it any more. I realized how lucky and privileged I was, but all I wanted to do was die." — Cara Delevingne, on living with depression

16. Comedian Patton Oswalt laid out the difference between living with depression and surviving the devastation of losing a loved one.

Photo by Richard Shotwell/Invision/AP.

“Depression is more seductive. Its tool is: ‘Wouldn’t it be way more comfortable to stay inside and not deal with people?’ Grief is an attack on life. It’s not a seducer. It’s an ambush or worse. It stands right out there and says: ‘The minute you try something, I’m waiting for you.’” — Patton Oswalt, on living with depression and the grief brought on by his wife's death

17. Singer Kesha opened up about what led her to a rehab program focused on treating eating disorders.

Photo by Angela Weiss/AFP/Getty Images.

"I felt like part of my job was to be as skinny as possible and, to make that happen, I had been abusing my body. I just wasn't giving it the energy it needed to keep me healthy and strong." — Kesha, on living with an eating disorder

18. Author John Green wrote about the dangers of romanticizing mental illness.

Photo by Cooper Neill/Getty Images for Allied-THA.

"Mental illness is stigmatized, but it is also romanticized. If you google the phrase 'all artists are,' the first suggestion is 'mad.' We hear that genius is next to insanity. ... Of course, there are kernels of truth here: Many artists and storytellers do live with mental illness. But many don’t. And what I want to say today, I guess, is that you can be sane and be an artist, and also that if you are sick, getting help  —  although it is hard and exhausting and inexcusably difficult to access  —  will not make you less of an artist." — John Green, on living with depression

19. Musical artist Halsley discussed her attempt at suicide as a teenager.

Photo by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images.

“I had tried to kill myself. I was an adolescent; I didn’t know what I was doing. Because I was 17, I was still in a children’s ward. Which was terrifying. I was in there with 9-year-olds who had tried to kill themselves.” — Halsley, on living with bipolar disorder, and once staying in a psychiatric hospital

20. Prince Harry addressed the problem with assuming people who seemingly have their lives in order aren't struggling with an invisible issue.

Photo by Chris Jackson - Pool/Getty Images.

You know, I really regret not ever talking about it. ... A lot of people think if you’ve got a job, if you’ve got financial security, if you’ve got a family, you’ve got a house, all that sort of stuff — everyone seems to think that is all you need and you are absolutely fine to deal with stuff.” — Prince Harry, on living with grief after his mother's death

21. Actress Rowan Blanchard explained why living with a mental illness can be a learning opportunity.

Photo by Mike Windle/Getty Images for WE Day.

"I learned this year that happiness and sadness are not mutually exclusive. They can exist within me at the same time in the same moment. While also becoming more forgiving of myself and my emotions, I became more forgiving of others, specifically other teenagers." — Rowan Blanchard, on living with depression

22. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps spoke candidly about why even gold medals couldn't truly make him happy.

Photo by Clive Rose/Getty Images.

“I went in with no self-confidence, no self-love. I think the biggest thing was, I thought of myself as just a swimmer, and nobody else. ... I was lost, pushing a lot people out of my life — people that I wanted and needed in my life. I was running and escaping from whatever it was I was running from.” — Michael Phelps, on living with mental illness

23. Actress Jenifer Lewis talked about how the AIDS epidemic led her to realize she needed help.

Photo by Jean Baptiste LaCroix/AFP/Getty Images.

"Sometimes I suspected that something was not quite right. Especially during the time when the AIDS epidemic was at its height and my grief was pretty much out of control. No one was talking about bipolar disorder and mental illness back then. I had lost so many friends and loved ones. My spiral into depression was overwhelming; I could not function. That’s when I couldn’t ignore the fact that something was wrong anymore.” — Jenifer Lewis, on living with bipolar disorder

24. Singer Adele highlighted why not each form of mental illness manifests the same way in every person.

Photo by Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP.

"My knowledge of postpartum [depression] — or post-natal, as we call it in England — is that you don’t want to be with your child; you’re worried you might hurt your child; you’re worried you weren’t doing a good job. But I was obsessed with my child. I felt very inadequate; I felt like I’d made the worst decision of my life. ... It can come in many different forms." — Adele, on living with postpartum depression

25. Actor Jared Padalecki launched a new "I Am Enough" campaign, selling shirts to support initiatives that fight depression and self-harm.

Photo by Chris Frawley/Warner Bros. Entertainment Inc. via Getty Images.

“I am enough. And you are enough. ... I know I can keep fighting and I know that I’m trying to love myself, but sometimes you feel like you’re not enough. So this message is helping me kind of understand that I am enough — just the way I was made.” — Jared Padalecki, on living with depression

26. Actress Amanda Seyfried nailed why we should be treating mental illness just as seriously as any other disease or condition.

Photo by Lintao Zhang/Getty Images for cle de peau BEAUTE.

"I’m on [antidepressant] Lexapro, and I’ll never get off of it. I’ve been on it since I was 19, so 11 years. I’m on the lowest dose. I don’t see the point of getting off of it. Whether it’s placebo or not, I don’t want to risk it. And what are you fighting against? Just the stigma of using a tool? A mental illness is a thing that people cast in a different category [from other illnesses], but I don’t think it is. It should be taken as seriously as anything else." — Amanda Seyfried, on living with anxiety and depression

27. Musical artist Keke Palmer opened up about how her own mental illness postponed the release of a new album.

Photo by Kimberly White/Getty Images for Glamour.

“I stopped trying all together because I allowed people to make me believe that being an artist meant having big budget music videos and big record producers backing you. When in reality, all being an artist means is to be fearless in your creative pursuits. My anxiety, caused by the habit of unconsciously holding my breath, coupled with the stress of my personal life at that time created a lot of hard years of depression for me.” — Keke Palmer, on living with anxiety

28. Actress Catherine Zeta-Jones said she's in a good place right now, thanks to identifying her struggle and finding the help that was right for her.

Photo by Justin Tallis/AFP/Getty Images.

"Finding out that it was called something was the best thing that ever happened to me! The fact that there was a name for my emotions and that a professional could talk me through my symptoms was very liberating. There are amazing highs and very low lows. My goal is to be consistently in the middle. I’m in a very good place right now." — Catherine Zeta-Jones, on living with bipolar disorder

29. Actor Devon Murray used World Mental Health Day to share his own ups and downs with fans on Twitter.

Photo by Scott Gries/Getty Images.

"I've been battling depression in silence for ten years and only recently spoke about it and [it] has made a huge difference. I had suicidal thoughts this year and that was the kick up the arse that I needed! Open up, talk to people. If you suspect a friend or family member is suffering in silence [reach out] to them. Let them know you care." — Devon Murray, on living with depression

30. Musical artist Jade Thirlwall discussed a dark time in her life that looked picture-perfect from afar.

Photo by Ian Gavan/Getty Images for Sony Pictures.

"My periods stopped and things were getting out of control, but I don't think I really cared about what was happening to me. I felt so depressed at the time that I just wanted to waste away and disappear. ... It should have been a really happy time — my career was successful, 'Black Magic' was doing well, and we were traveling and performing. On the surface I was happy, but inside I felt broken." — Jade Thirlwall, on battling anorexia

31. Musician Ellie Goulding explained how her panic attacks often came at the worst possible times.

Photo by Ian Gavan/Getty Images.

"I was skeptical [of going to therapy] at first, because I’d never had therapy, but not being able to leave the house was so debilitating. And this was when my career was really taking off. My surroundings would trigger a panic attack, so I couldn’t go to the studio unless I was lying down in the car with a pillow over my face. I used to beat myself up about it." — Ellie Goulding, on living with anxiety and facing panic attacks

Many celebrities have helped bring the conversation around mental health into the mainstream. But it's on us to make the real change happen.

“While it’s amazing to have celebrities out there blazing trails and introducing a radical new transparency," Harvey notes, "the most important thing is that individual sufferers communicate with their everyday connections. If we really want to make an impact on stigma, it can’t just be a headline."

If you need help, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1‑800‑273‑TALK (8255). If you want to learn more about mental illness, visit the National Alliance on Mental Health.

Russian novelist Leo Tolstoy.

Leo Tolstoy was a Russian novelist known for epic works such as War and Peace and Anna Karenina. His life experiences—from witnessing war to spiritual quests—profoundly influenced his writings and gave him profound insights into the human soul. His understanding of emotions, motivations and moral dilemmas has made his work stand the test of time, and it still resonates with people today.

Julian de Medeiros, a TikToker who shares his thoughts on philosophy, recently shared how Tolstoy knew if someone was highly intelligent—and his observation says something extraordinary about humanity.

intelligence, thinking, thought process, humanity, humansAn intelligent man's thought process.Canva Photos

“The more intelligent a person is, the more he discovers kindness in others,” Tolstoy once wrote. “For nothing enriches the world more than kindness. It makes mysterious things clear, difficult things easy, and dull things cheerful.”

@julianphilosophy

Intelligent people are kind #intelligent #intelligence #kindness #smart #tolstoy #men #women


De Medeiros boiled down Tolstoy’s thoughts into a simple statement: “Intelligent people are unafraid to be kind.” He then took things a step further by noting that Tolstoy believed in the power of emotional intelligence. "To have emotional intelligence is to see the good in other people, that is what Tolstoy meant, that to be intelligent is to be kind," he added.

It seems that, according to de Medeiros, Tolstoy understood that intelligent people are kind and perceptive of the kindness in others. The intelligent person is conscious of the kindness within themselves and in the world around them.

In a 2024 opinion piece for Inc., author and speaker Jeff Hayden cites organizational psychologist Adam Grant, who says, "Generosity isn't just a sign of virtue. It's also a mark of intelligence. Data: people with high IQs have more unselfish values, give more to charity, and negotiate better deals for others. They prioritize the long-term collective good over short-term self-interest. It's smarter to be a giver than a taker."

Hayden adds on to this statement, saying, "...You can also be smart enough to be generous, thoughtful, and kind. You can be smart enough to build people up instead of tearing them down. You can be smart enough to give before you receive (or better yet, with no expectation of reciprocation.) You can be smart enough to shift the credit from yourself to others."

kindness, intelligence, humanity, human condition, be kindKids showing kindness through sharing. Canva Photos

In other words, these findings certainly line up with what Tolstoy's take on the correlation between kindness and intelligence.

Through Tolstoy's musings, de Medeiros (and Hayden and Grant) makes a point that is often overlooked when people talk about intelligence: truly smart people are as in touch with their hearts as they are with their minds.

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.

Parenting

Millennial dad of 3 unloads on boomer parents over their unreasonable holiday plans

"Yeah, not this time," he said. "I think for the holidays I'm just gonna stay in and relax."

via Canva/Photos
A Millennial dad has had it with his boomer dad's expectations.

The holidays are supposed to be a time for enjoying special moments with family, but often they become a source of stress. Traveling, navigating familial relationships and tensions, talking politics at the dinner table, and handling the all-encompassing issue of "presents" can wear down even the most patient and even-keeled person. It can be especially challenging for parents with young kids who are expected to travel long distances in the name of "family togetherness."

A TikTok video posted by @carrerasfam is going viral, with over 300,000 views, because so many millennial parents can relate to the frustration of grandparents having unrealistic expectations related to visiting with the kids.

In the satirical video, a husband stages a conversation with his "practically retired" baby boomer dad, in which he explains politely but firmly that he’s not taking his 3 young kids on a 400-mile drive to their house for the holidays.

Carerras Fam is a popular TikTok page about “all things postpartum and mamahood.” Together, the mom and dad share funny skits and slices of their life with three little ones.

The husband opens the conversation with his dad by explaining all the inconveniences of taking 3 young kids on a long road trip. “I know you want us to drive down for the holidays, but it's kinda ridiculous that you want me to pack my 3 kids with their portable beds with my clothes, their clothes, the formula, everything that goes on with raising 3 kids and having them feel comfortable. Drive down for over four hours just so that we could spend some time in your house?” the husband says while absurdist music plays in the background.


@carrerasfam

Sorry it’s just so much work. But you’re welcome to visit us #millennial #millennials #parents #parenting #parentsontiktok #boomers #millennials

It’s obviously inconvenient for the couple to pack up their kids and drive 4 hours, but it’s also unsafe because the house is not baby-proof. "I'm gonna have to run around, make sure that they don't break any of your stuff, and which you will 'take care of them,'” the husband continues using sarcastic air quotes. Most parents eventually realize that visiting with the kids does not equate to getting help with them — no, it means chasing them around frantically yourself until it's time to leave.

The dad brings up another great point: His parents are in good health, so why don’t they drive to their house? “You could visit. You don't have little kids,” the dad continues. “You don't have anything going on.

"Why is it that every time I have to make the effort for you, yet you can't do the most basic thing for me?”

millennials, baby boomers, parenting, dads, moms, babysitting, grandparents, parenting tips, family, love, kidsAll parents feel like this when it comes to spending time with the grands.Giphy

It’s clear from the phone call the dad understands that traveling with the kids and staying in a house that isn’t correctly set up for young kids will make the holiday a struggle. Instead of making memories, they’ll most likely be running around bent over trying to save their kids from breaking something or hanging out at Target buying electrical socket plugs and a bottle brush because they left theirs at home. What's especially frustrating is the pressure and expectations. Parents are often guilted for not wanting to pack up the the kids and travel, even though it's not hard to see why they hate it so much.

The video struck a chord with many millennial parents. Nearly 500,000 people watched the clip with hundreds and hundreds pouring in to vent their own similar frustrations.


@carrerasfam

Something needs to change #parenting #parents

“First holiday with a kid… parents are confused why I won’t drive 9 hours with a 3mnth old for Christmas,” too_many_catz writes.

“The ‘not baby proofed’ part hit my soullllllll. It’s so stressful having to chase your kids around and ask to close doors, move pictures, block stairs, etc. And nobody takes you seriously!" OhHeyItsIndy added.

It’s also expensive for young families to travel. “Add to it they want us to spend money on gas, airfare, etc. when we live paycheck to paycheck and rent while they own homes and live comfortably off a pension,” another user wrote.

"My mom asked me to drive 13 hours with our 2 month old…she doesn’t work and has flight points," one mom added.

This one hit hard: “They always act like you're asking the world of them, yet they will willingly go on any other vacation that they choose,” Mackenzie Byrne wrote.

"They can never make the trip for us but they can make them trips to Europe and cruises to the Caribbean," another user noted.

TX Travel Chick may have hit the nail on the head with her explanation for why boomer parents expect their children to road trip it to their house for the holidays. “Because we are used to following their orders!!! REVOLT,” she wrote.

millennials, baby boomers, parenting, dads, moms, babysitting, grandparents, parenting tips, family, love, kidsSee ya next year, grandpaGiphy

Ultimately, it would be interesting to learn why boomer parents want to inconvenience their kids when it would be much easier for them to take a trip to see them, especially if they can afford a hotel. One wonders if they are being entitled or if they’ve forgotten how hard it is to travel with young kids. In some cases, it's a little more complicated — many baby boomer grandparents are still working and have less time and resources than previous generations did to help with the kids.

"Yeah, not this time," the dad sums up in the video. "I think for the holidays I'm just gonna stay in and relax."

It's a hilarious and relatable video, but ultimately, it's a skit. The power of boomer-grandparent guilt remains undefeated in many households, so the smart money says the Carreras family sucked it up and traveled for the holidays despite their annoyance. Here's hoping that together, we can eventually break the generational curse when our kids become parents one day.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

How are these both high schoolers?

Have you ever looked back at your parents’ high school yearbook and thought that all the 11th graders looked like they were in their early 30s? Whether they were in school in the ‘60s and the kids had horn-rimmed glasses or the ‘80s with feathered hair, they looked at least a decade older than today's high school kids. One wonders if in 30 years, kids look at a yearbook from 2025 and see boys with broccoli cuts and girls with nose rings and they think, “What are they, 35?”

The folks at Bright Side did a deep dive into the phenomenon and found a few reasons why people looked so much older in the past than they do now. It’s a mix of how our minds perceive older fashion and why people age more gracefully in modern times.

Why did people look older in the past?

“Specialists have looked into this phenomenon, and it does have some scientific facts to back it up,” the narrator states. “It's not necessarily that our ancestors looked older; it's more that we appear to look younger. And younger as generations go by, that's because over time humans have improved the way they live their lives in the us alone over the last 200 years.”

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

A big reason people looked a lot older when photography became common in the late 1800s is that it happened at a time when we were making tremendous advances in public health. The 1880s to the 1920s were a time of rapid advancement, when we began to understand infectious diseases and how they spread. “We gained access after safer types of foods, and we understand the importance of clean water. Our individual lifestyle choices can impact the way we look,” the video says.

The way we work has also drastically changed how people look. Working in an office for eight hours a day in air conditioning will keep you a lot younger-looking than working all day as a Victorian chimney sweep. Plus, for people who work outside, sunscreen has made it much easier to protect our skin and decrease wrinkles.

Let’s not forget the importance of a straight, white smile. Advances in dental care also help make people look younger.

1970s girls, high school girls, girls in uniforms, old high school photos, nostalgiaA "girl gang" in 1976. via Earthworm/Flickr

Why do people wearing styles from the past appear older?

Finally, there’s the clothes issue, and, yes, this does have a big impact on how we view the age of people from the past. “Our brains are wired to associate old trends with being old,” the video says. “For example, your grandpa might still have the shirt he wore in that 1970s picture, and it's because of that shirt that you retroactively associate that trend with being old, despite the fact that your granddad does look younger in the picture than he looks today. “

girls in school, '60s high school girls, class room, old-school cool,GIrls in class in the 1960s.via Phillips Academy/Flickr

In the end, the fact that people look a lot younger today than they did in the past is a testament to how the quality of life has drastically improved since cameras were first invented. However, that doesn’t mean that fashion has improved at all. You have to admit that your dad with that fly butterfly collar in his 1977 graduation photo looks better than that multi-colored, Machine Gun Kelly-style hoodie you see guys wearing in high schools today.

Parenting

Xennial parents share how they're healing generational parenting wounds with their own kids

"I tell my son 'I love you' more times in a day than my father said that to me my entire life."

Image via Canva

Xennial parents discuss how they parent differently than their Boomer and Gen X parents.

Xennials are those born from 1977 to 1983, and sandwiched between Gen X and Millennials. Xennials grew up with Boomer or older Gen X parents who they claim may have led with harshness (and some toxic parenting traits) that they are trying to correct.

In a Reddit Xennial forum, member @Montawked shared: "My 8 [year-old] didn't brush her teeth last night, so there was no dessert tonight. I warned her yesterday, natural consequences and all, but she made her choice. Tonight she is bawling about it," she wrote.

She continued to share, "I said, 'I know you're upset, but is this something to cry about?' My inner voice said, 'I'll give you something to cry about' WHOA. HOLD UP. Subconscious messaging from my boomer parents popping in! I would NEVER say this to my kids. Wtf were they thinking? Shared with my hubby, and he said his folks said that and 'I brought you into this world....' Cheers to us breaking the cycle."

The poignant moment touched other Xennial parents who resonated with her on how they are healing generational parenting wounds in their own families, and inspired conversation between them about their experiences. These are 15 of the most compelling responses from Xennial parents.

kids, hug, hugging, hugging kids, parents hug kidsHappy Sound Of Music GIF by The Rodgers & Hammerstein OrganizationGiphy

"My kids recently saw spanking of children in a movie and were really confused, I had to explain it and they thought it was a wild concept." —@miuzzo

"I tell my son 'I love you' more times in a day than my father said that to me my entire life." —@andy_nony_mouse

"My kids KNOW they’re safe with me, they know I’ll always have their back. I can’t recall ever having that feeling of safety as a child." —@HeslopDC

emotional, i love you, tearing up, crying, feelingsSeason 1 Nod GIF by SHOWTIMEGiphy

"My mom said both. When my dad used the 'I brought you into this world line', you would think he drop kicked a puppy. Suddenly she was quizzing him on our birthdays and how long every delivery took and trying to get him to even be able to say what hospital we were born in. My dad was at all of our births. He drove. He was there the whole time. He’s him, and he couldn’t even remember what planet it was on, let alone what hospital. After he ran away because he couldn’t answer even what order we were born in, she looked at us and said 'never let anyone take your story from you. It’s yours. You’re mine. You’re my story. You’re part of his story, you ARE my Story.' And that was it. Every time someone says their father said it, I remember that moment. I can’t imagine any other father having the audacity to say they brought anyone into the world — they didn’t. The woman did." —@TangledUpPuppeteer

"My dad never said that but he did say 'your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft.' Which I always found hilarious." —@geriatric_tatertot

"I definitely got the 'something to cry about' bit from my dad, which usually did include the ass whooping it implied. My mom would occasionally go for wordplay, like if I was asking for a pop she might raise a fist and say 'give you a pop alright!' but with her it was always just a joke." —@Fackrid

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"I think 'something to cry about' was my dad too, and mom would say 'wait til your dad gets home' although she also spanked us if she had a paddle for it. She used her hand sometimes too but “couldn’t do it hard enough” then." —@PrismInTheDark

"My mom said both to me along with telling me that's what she had me for when I complained about having to empty her ashtray. It's amazing she doesn't understand why we aren't close." —@SuspiciousCranberry6

"I was going to knocked into next week. We actually played a game where my older sister knocked me into next week and I would pretend to be all confused." —@idontknowhowaboutyou

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"My mom used to say 'you’re cruisin for a bruisin'." —@Holmes221bBSt

"My kid is being raised very very differently than how I was." —@sidvictorious

"Having kids, that whole line 'this is gonna hurt me more than it hurts you.' Oh that is so not true, that’s not how anger works. I get wound up too. Time out is as much for them as it is for me." —@gnrlgumby

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"Don’t forget 'because I said so!' I’m staying away from that one and actually explaining the 'why.' Works so much better." —@esmerelda_b

"My brain still recites the stuff I heard as a child but I would never say it to my own kids. I’m revolted at even hearing my inner voice say it. I heard that the first thought you have is based on your conditioning and the follow up thought is who you really are. This resonates with me. The conditioning is hard core." —@HeslopDC

"I struggle with this too. My youngest also has some emotional reactions that my wife and I find to be extreme relative to their stimulus. Crying over Fortnite. Crying over being asked some questions. Crying over every little thing. It is exhausting as a parent. I try to to carefully say, 'it's okay to cry, but is this really something that we need to be this upset about'? I hope I am finding the right balance compared the belt-to-ass up ringing I got." —@Rockdad37

Pop Culture

'She's a hero.' 4-year-old's quick thinking saves her teacher's life after she collapsed

"It was a shock to me to see that she knew exactly what to do in a situation like that," her mom shared.

Kids have better instincts than we give them credit for.

We do our best to teach our kids everything they need to handle what life throws at them, but sometimes they are simply born with the right instincts.

When four-year-old Kyndal Bradley saw her daycare teacher collapse due to a seizure, leaving the entire classroom alone without an adult, she knew exactly what to do. Rather than freezing up or crying, she immediately went to get help.

Without this fast action, her teacher would have been in serious trouble—as in, a life or death situation. But luckily paramedics arrived in time to take the teacher to the hospital.

As reported byWSMV Nashville, Taylor Moore, Kyndal’s mom, had no idea of this brave feat until she went to pick her little girl up that afternoon.

“They were like, ‘She’s our hero for the day,’ and I’m kind of looking like, what happened?” Moore shared.

Understandably, this news was unexpected. Though Moore had been teaching Kyndal a few basics, like her phone number and home address, she “never thought to introduce what to do if an emergency arises, so it was a shock to me to see that she knew exactly what to do in a situation like that.”

At the same time, Moore told WSMV that Kyndal has a natural "nurturing spirit,” and is always taking care of her fellow classmates, so in some ways, it’s not that much of a surprise. Regardless, Moore is “very proud” of how Kyndal handled the situation.

And how’s this for heartwarming? When asked if there’s anything she’d like her recovering teacher to know, Kyndal simply said, “I love you.” What pure sweetness!

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Down in the comments, viewers also hailed Kyndal a hero.

“I have epilepsy, that little girl is so brave. I know adults who are petrified by the thought of a seizure occurring near them. She’s gonna be a caretaker of some sort when she grows up. Good job baby. Keep up the good work, keep helping people in need.”

“Great job mom. What an amazing little girl you have.”

“What a great example of great parenting! Teaching this precious little girl to be nurturing and caring to others! Her caring and concern for the needs of those around her and her mom teaching her emergency skills amazing! This little lady is a little hero !!! God bless her and her mom for teaching her to care and what to do in an emergency!!!”

“What a heartfelt story!! This is what the world needed to hear because of the chaotic times that we are in. Not only is she beautiful and quick on her feet, but she is very intelligent.”

Moore hopes that this moment acts as a reminder for parents to “not underestimate” how their own littles might fare in a crisis, and to start teaching them skills sooner rather than later.

“They’re little, but they may be our saviors, so they need to know how to react.”

Preparing kids for emergencies

nashville, nashville news, positive news, good news, daycare, emergency preparednessA child dialing 911Photo credit: Canva

In most emergency situations involving kids, a major skill to learn is how to successfully handle a 911 call, even when nerves are at play. That means making sure they know how to give their phone number and address correctly (just like Moore taught Kyndal), to state whether someone is ill or hurt, and to know if they need to leave the area before calling (in the case of a fire, for example). In this day and age, it’s also super important that they know how to unlock a mobile phone and dial on it.

It’s also vital for kids to understand how to recognize when a medical emergency might be happening, whether it be a person collapsing, like in Kyndal’s story, or simply gasping for air.

On the preventative maintenance side, families can do emergency planning together, including bringing the children in on creating emergency kits and doing practice runs.

And, as Moore said, it's equally crucial to trust that kids will know what to do with the lessons we try to bestow onto them.