upworthy
Democracy

The Onion filed a Supreme Court brief. It's both hilariously serious and seriously hilarious.

Who else could call the judiciary 'total Latin dorks' while making a legitimate point?

the onion supreme court

The Onion's Supreme Court brief uses parody to defend parody.

Political satire and parody have been around for at least 2,400 years, as ancient Greek playwright Aristophanes satirized the way Athenian leaders conducted the Peloponnesian War and parodied the dramatic styles of his contemporaries, Aeschylus and Euripides.

Satire and parody are used to poke fun and highlight issues, using mimicry and sarcasm to create comedic biting commentary. No modern outlet has been more prolific on this front than The Onion, and the popular satirical news site is defending parody as a vital free speech issue in a legal filing with the U.S. Supreme Court.

The filing is, as one might expect from The Onion, as brilliantly hilarious as it is serious, using the same satirical style it's defending in the crafting of the brief itself.


The Onion filed its amicus brief in support of Anthony Novak, a man who was arrested for and prosecuted for parodying the Parma, Ohio, police department on Facebook. Citing a law against disrupting police operations, the police searched Novak's apartment, seized his electronics and put him in jail, where he spent four days before making bail. After a jury acquitted him of all criminal charges, he subsequently filed a civil lawsuit against the police for violating his First and Fourth Amendment rights. However, a federal appeals court threw out the lawsuit, ruling that the officers had "qualified immunity," which protects government officials from being sued for unconstitutional infringements.

The Onion is petitioning for a writ of certiorari, asking the Supreme Court to review the Sixth Circuit Court of Appeals' decision to toss out Novak's civil rights suit. As NPR points out, one primary question in this case is whether people reasonably believed Novak's Facebook page, which used the department's real name and photo but had a satirical slogan ("We no crime."), to be the department's real page.

The Onion argues that such ambiguity and potential confusion is exactly the point of parody. But the way the argument is made—using satire and parody to defend satire and parody—is making headlines.

The 23-page amicus brief can be read in full here, but let's look at some of the highlights:

First, the description of The Onion itself:

"The Onion is the world’s leading news publication, offering highly acclaimed, universally revered coverage of breaking national, international, and local news events. Rising from its humble beginnings as a print newspaper in 1756, The Onion now enjoys a daily readership of 4.3 trillion and has grown into the single most powerful and influential organization in human history.

"In addition to maintaining a towering standard of excellence to which the rest of the industry aspires, The Onion supports more than 350,000 full- and parttime journalism jobs in its numerous news bureaus and manual labor camps stationed around the world, and members of its editorial board have served with distinction in an advisory capacity for such nations as China, Syria, Somalia, and the former Soviet Union. On top of its journalistic pursuits, The Onion also owns and operates the majority of the world’s transoceanic shipping lanes, stands on the nation’s leading edge on matters of deforestation and strip mining, and proudly conducts tests on millions of animals daily."

It's clear to a reasonable mind that they're not being serious here. And yet, this description is being filed in a real Supreme Court filing, setting the stage for the entire argument of how parody works.

"Put simply, for parody to work, it has to plausibly mimic the original," the brief states. "The Sixth Circuit’s decision in this case would condition the First Amendment’s protection for parody upon a requirement that parodists explicitly say, up-front, that their work is nothing more than an elaborate fiction. But that would strip parody of the very thing that makes it function. The Onion cannot stand idly by in the face of a ruling that threatens to disembowel a form of rhetoric that has existed for millennia, that is particularly potent in the realm of political debate, and that, purely incidentally, forms the basis of The Onion’s writers’ paychecks."

The writer of the brief clearly wasn't going to let the opportunity to demonstrate the comedic nature of satire to pass simply because this was an actual legal document being filed before the highest court in the land, nor was he going to spare the judiciary from being the object of said comedy.

It took some gumption to write this paragraph, but oh gracious is it perfection. While arguing that parody functions by tricking people into thinking it's real, the brief states:

"Tu stultus es. You are dumb. These three Latin words have been The Onion’s motto and guiding light since it was founded in 1988 as America’s Finest News Source, leading its writers toward the paper’s singular purpose of pointing out that its readers are deeply gullible people. The Onion’s motto is central to this brief for two important reasons. First, it’s Latin. And The Onion knows that the federal judiciary is staffed entirely by total Latin dorks: They quote Catullus in the original Latin in chambers. They sweetly whisper 'stare decisis' into their spouses’ ears. They mutter 'cui bono' under their breath while picking up after their neighbors’ dogs. So The Onion knew that, unless it pointed to a suitably Latin rallying cry, its brief would be operating far outside the Court’s vernacular."

Just jaw-droppingly irreverent, and yet immediately following is a totally cogent and reasoned argument about the nature of parody, complete with citations and footnotes:

"The second reason—perhaps mildly more important—is that the phrase 'you are dumb' captures the very heart of parody: tricking readers into believing that they’re seeing a serious rendering of some specific form—a pop song lyric, a newspaper article, a police beat—and then allowing them to laugh at their own gullibility when they realize that they’ve fallen victim to one of the oldest tricks in the history of rhetoric. See San Francisco Bay Guardian, Inc. v. Super. Ct., 21 Cal. Rptr. 2d 464, 466 (Ct. App. 1993) ('[T]he very nature of parody . . . is to catch the reader off guard at first glance, after which the ‘victim’ recognizes that the joke is on him to the extent that it caught him unaware.').

"It really is an old trick. The word 'parody' stretches back to the Hellenic world. It originates in the prefix para, meaning an alteration, and the suffix ode, referring to the poetry form known as an ode.3 One of its earliest practitioners was the first-century B.C. poet Horace, whose Satires would replicate the exact form known as an ode—mimicking its meter, its subject matter, even its self-serious tone—but tweaking it ever so slightly so that the form was able to mock its own idiocies."

The brief is a brilliant defense of parody wrapped up in perfect parodic packaging, which is even pointed out in the arguments to drive home the point, as on page 15:

"This is the fifteenth page of a convoluted legal filing intended to deconstruct the societal implications of parody, so the reader’s attention is almost certainly wandering. That’s understandable. So here is a paragraph of gripping legal analysis to ensure that every jurist who reads this brief is appropriately impressed by the logic of its argument and the lucidity of its prose: Bona vacantia. De bonis asportatis. Writ of certiorari. De minimis. Jus accrescendi. Forum non conveniens. Corpus juris. Ad hominem tu quoque. Post hoc ergo propter hoc. Quod est demonstrandum. Actus reus. Scandalum magnatum. Pactum reservati dominii.

"See what happened? This brief itself went from a discussion of parody’s function—and the quite serious historical and legal arguments in favor of strong protections for parodic speech—to a curveball mocking the way legalese can be both impenetrably boring and belie the hollowness of a legal position. That’s the setup and punchline idea again. It would not have worked quite as well if this brief had said the following: 'Hello there, reader, we are about to write an amicus brief about the value of parody. Buckle up, because we’re going to be doing some fairly outré things, including commenting on this text’s form itself!' Taking the latter route would have spoiled the joke and come off as more than a bit stodgy. But more importantly, it would have disarmed the power that comes with a form devouring itself. For millennia, this has been the rhythm of parody: The author convinces the readers that they’re reading the real thing, then pulls the rug out from under them with the joke. The heart of this form lies in that give and take between the serious setup and the ridiculous punchline."

The Onion has outdone itself many times, but this amicus brief may be its best work yet right up to the end.

"The Onion intends to continue its socially valuable role bringing the disinfectant of sunlight into the halls of power…," the argument section concludes. "And it would vastly prefer that sunlight not to be measured out to its writers in 15- minute increments in an exercise yard."

Definitely give the full brief a read. You'll certainly never read another Supreme Court filing like it.

Health

She was 15 when men threw acid in her face. They told her she’d be ashamed forever.

ReSurge International helped Muskan Khatun reconstruct her body, and now she’s using her voice to advocate for burn and gender-based violence survivors.

ReSurge International

Muskan Khatun was only 15 when she survived an acid attack in Nepal.

True

When Muskan Khatun was 15 years old, a group of young men started teasing her on her way to school in Nepal. She found it disturbing and uncomfortable, but they wouldn’t stop.

“I finally told my family,” Muskan says. “My dad confronted them, scolded them, and even slapped one of them. After that, they stopped bothering me for about three months.

“Then, one day, when I was heading to school, I saw them again. This time, they had a jug of acid. They tried to make me drink it, but I refused. In anger, they threw the acid on my face, hands, and chest.”

The attackers were arrested, and good samaritans nearby got Muskan to Kirtipur Hospital, where she was treated by local ReSurge surgeon and Country Director, Dr. Shankar Man Rai and his team. Resurge International is a non-profit organization that provides free reconstructive surgical care and trains surgical teams in low-income countries around the world to increase access to care for people who need it, like Muskan. ReSurge’s team in Nepal has treated 141 intentional burn attacks like Muskan’s over the last seven years.

ReSurge helped Muskan take her life back. But that was only the beginning of her story.

ReSurge International

One teen’s perseverance created historic change in the law.

“As I learned more about the laws in my country, I realized the justice system didn’t provide enough protection or punishment for such crimes,” Muskan says.” It felt like a bigger hurt than the acid attack itself. That’s when I decided to raise my voice and work towards changing the laws to ensure justice for others like me.”

Muskan wrote to the Prime Minister just days after her attack, but got no response. So she took her voice to the public. For two years, she courageously shared her story and advocated for better laws.

Finally, the Prime Minister invited her to his residence. He listened to her experiences and legal ideas, and in just 15 days, he passed a law specifically targeting acid attacks. The law also passed in Nepal’s parliament in record time.

“This was the first time in Nepal that a law was passed so swiftly,” Muskan says. “The new law was very strict, including a life sentence for offenders, marking the most severe punishment in Nepal for such crimes.” In 2021 Muskan was awarded the prestigious International Women of Courage (IWOC) Award by the U.S. Secretary of State for her work to end acid attacks.

Muskan Khutan's awardsMuskan has won multiple awards for her advocacy work.Resurge International

Muskan is not alone. Acid attack survivors around the world have raised their voices to get laws changed—but that’s not the only battle they’re fighting.

Constructing laws is one thing. Reconstructing your burned body is another.

Chemical burns leave survivors with painful scar contractures that restrict movement over the affected areas, forcing them to also relive their trauma every time they look in the mirror or field questions from people about what happened to them. However, burn scars require specialized surgical care, which often isn’t readily available or affordable in most low-income countries.

That’s where ReSurge International comes in.

With a conservative estimate of 10,000 acid attacks each year (many countries don’t keep official records of acid attacks and an estimated 40% of attacks go unreported, according to Acid Survivors Trust International), the surgical needs just for intentional burn victims is significant. Additionally, with 80% of acid attack survivors being women, the gender-based violence aspect of the issue cannot be ignored.

But there’s a gap in surgery accessibility between people in high-income nations, where plastic surgery is often viewed as elective and cosmetic, and those in low-income countries, where it more often addresses critical medical needs.

One way ReSurge is closing that gap is by training the next generation of reconstructive surgeons across Africa, Asia and Latin America, in countries where acid attacks are high. Rather than only sending in surgeons from the outside, ReSurge trains and funds local surgeons, anesthesiologists, nurses, and occupational therapists, focusing on capacity building and prioritizing locally-led solutions with an extra emphasis on training women to close the gender gap in medicine and surgery. Just last year, ReSurge transformed the lives of over 25,000 patients and trained more than 5,000 medical professionals, with 85% of their surgeries being conducted by local partners.

Raising awareness is another way ReSurge is working to ‘close the gap.’

Seeing a potential for a powerful partnership, Resurge orchestrated the first face-to-face meeting between Muskan and fellow acid attack survivor and Woman of Courage Award Winner, Natalia Ponce de León from Colombia, in June of 2024. Like Muskan, Natalia has worked tirelessly to advocate for survivors’ rights and successfully inspired change to her country’s laws. She currently runs a foundation to ensure survivors of chemical attacks get the medical, psychological and legal care they need and deserve. Through the power of mentorship and mutual support, these two remarkable women will be able to increase their reach and amplify the impact of the incredible work they’re already doing.

Muskan Khutan and Natalia Ponce de Le\u00f3nMuskan and Natalia are working together to advocate for acid attack survivors.ReSurge International

Preventing more attacks like the ones that changed Muskan and Natalia’s lives requires a multi-faceted approach, as does care for survivors who are living with the aftermath of such violence. Survivor advocates and organizations like ReSurge International working together to ensure that care is accessible for all is a reminder of what humans can do when we set our sights on solutions and keep striving to implement them in the most effective way possible.


Interested in helping? This giving season, ReSurge is matching every gift for twice the impact. To make a gift to support patients like Muskan, read their stories, and learn more about how ReSurge International is closing the gap to reconstructive surgery, visit resurge.org/closing-the-gap

.

Her delight at finding a snack she liked has people in stitches.

In the age of Amazon and other online retailers, delivery drivers have become an integral part of our lives. But most of us rarely interact with the people who drop packages at our door via UPS or FedEx or USPS, and if we do, it's usually only for a few seconds. We might manage a friendly "Good afternoon!" or quick "Thanks a bunch!" as they hustle to and from their vehicle, always rushing to fulfil their quota as efficiently as possible.

Delivery folks work hard. They're on their feet much of the day, traipsing up hundreds of front walks a week, through all kinds of inclement weather. Yes, it's their job and they're paid to do it, but it's always nice to have your work seen and appreciated, which is one reason a video of UPS driver discovering a sweet treat on a customer's front porch is going viral.

Another reason is that it's just hilariously adorable.

A doorbell camera caught a UPS driver wearing a holiday bauble headband walking up to the door and dropping off a package as she talks to herself. After she takes a photo of the delivery, she sees that the customer had left a little tray of drinks and snacks, and her "Oooh, do I see honey bunny?" is a sign of the hilarity to come.

Watch her reaction and the way she joyfully make her way back to the truck.

Unsurprisingly, people are in love with the driver and her giddy goofiness.

"I literally laughed out loud at her crazy walk back to the truck. I need more people like her in my life."

"I have a friend like that, he just makes my day every time we see each other. 😂"

"That is way adorable! Simple act that makes the day of a random person <3."

"I don’t know anything else about her but she’s my new fave human."

"OMG she reminds me of our mail carrier so much. We leave her cookies at Christmas and she always does a little happy dance that day."

Delivery drivers and former delivery drivers shared that these kinds of gestures really do mean a lot.

"As a former delivery driver, i want you to know that if you leave snacks and drinks out for us, we love you to the moon and back. 💜"

"Driving for Amazon paid my rent for 10 months. Not exaggerating when I say that it was a dark time in my life. Snacks made me smile. every. single. time."

"I mean... I literally took something from every house that had stuff out. I worked 10-12hrs+ during the holidays... I needed every calorie I could get walking 20-30miles a day."

"Even when I didn't take them I appreciate them. it's like seeing a sign that says we love delivery drivers."

"I'll tell you what, the people who leave food got me through my holidays as a postal carrier. Nothing slaps harder than an ice cold redbull and bag of pretzels and ice cold bottle of water that was left in a cooler. I had a lady who asked me what I liked and then had sperate bags labeled "Mail carrier USPS" and "UPS GUY" and "FED EX GUY" with our preferred snacks. She asked me what my favorite ice cream was and she knew my mile long loop and knew when I parked, I'd be done in 15mins, so, she'd be waiting at the truck every day all summer with an ice cream and a napkin.

There are some people who just f---ing make the day feel worth it, if you are one of these people, you are what makes delivering mail worth it. We do notice the nice things you do for us, THANK YOU."

"I do this during the summer. I'm in Texas so it's routinely over 100°F. I'm always trying to make sure there are cold drinks for our postal workers and delivery people."

"I do it during Australian Christmas. 40c/100f plus on a December day. Coke water and Gatorade always gone by lunch."

It's a good reminder that it doesn't take a lot to show appreciation and make someone's day. These kinds of positive interactions, even when asynchronous and not directly face-to-face, are an important part of building the kind of world we all want to live in.

Unsplash

Is being naturally skinny akin to hitting the genetic lottery? Thin privilege, according to Thigh Society, refers to "societal advantages and preferential treatment that individuals who are perceived as thin or within the societal norms of beauty and body size experience. The term is often used to highlight the ways in which people with smaller bodies may face fewer obstacles, biases and discrimination compared to those with larger bodies."

Being thin can make it easier to land a job, find love, or even get proper healthcare. But it's easy to forget that, while naturally very skinny people might have it better in certain ways, they face significant problems too.

And now they're speaking out about challenges they face, misperceptions about being thin, and other things they wish people understood about them.

What experts say about thinness and body image

Kenny Eliason/Unsplash

Models are often thin. Actors and actresses are thin. Musicians are thin. So being thin is often considered the ideal when it comes to pop culture media portrayal of attractiveness.

But almost all people, regardless of shape or size, struggle with body image and being self-conscious about some aspects of our appearance.

"While individuals in thinner bodies may be perceived as fitting societal beauty standards, they are not immune to body image struggles or criticism," says Danielle Tucci, LPC at Live Better therapy Solutions. "Thin individuals often face contradictory messages. On one hand, they may be told they are 'lucky' or should have no reason to struggle with their appearance because their body aligns with societal ideals. On the other hand, they may face negative comments, we’ve all heard the 'eat a cheeseburger' line, or assumptions that their thinness is the result of an eating disorder."

"Thin people also often have to field uncomfortable remarks such as, 'Well, you wouldn’t know because you can wear anything,' or 'It must be nice to be able to eat that,'" adds Rachel Goldberg, LMFT, PMH-C, and eating disorders specialist.

During different cultural touch points, women may actually face pressure to have a fuller figure, and being too skinny can be considered unattractive. Men aren't in the clear from these lose-lose expectations either.

"Men are not excluded from negative messaging, as being thin has been associated with weakness, with societal messages around being stronger or more muscular as more ideal. Thin people also face criticism in other ways, like being labeled 'skinny fat,' especially during times when fit bodies were considered the ideal or when fuller bodies started to be more admired. On top of that, they’re often judged or questioned about whether they have an eating disorder, which can make thin people feel uncomfortable about their clothing or food choices when others are around."

For more insight, a recent Reddit thread posed the question: "Very skinny people: what are some difficulties/challenges that come with being really skinny?"

Nearly 2,000 people jumped in to comment, and the common themes in their stories were eye-opening to say the least.

Family, friends, and even strangers feel that they're 'allowed' to comment on a skinny person's body and diet. Being too think for women is associated with anorexia, and for men, with weakness and wimpyness.

Here's what Redditors had to say:

"People will think you have an eating disorder, and aren't afraid to ask about it." - PhotojournalistNew6

"When you get ill and can't really eat for 3-4 days. You don't really have the fat reserves to deal with that kind of thing as easily. So after you beat the illness, you need to recover from the lack of food." - Svencredible

"I was a skinny kid. If I ate a light meal, people would make snide comments about how I need to eat more. If I ate a heavy meal, they’d say 'must be nice to eat junk and stay thin.'" - gouwbadgers

"Metabolism finally changes, and now you've got a lifetime of unhealthy eating habits to break." - jsabo

"When I was a scrawny little preteen, i had trouble sleeping on my side without a pillow between my knees because they were so bony. I also often curled up, and it felt like my ribcage would smash into my pelvis if I wasn't careful." - MeticulousPlonker

"I was very skinny as kid to young adult. I was 6'3" and 140ish pounds from the time i was 14 until 18. People feel very comfortable commenting on your weight. All. The. Fucking. Time." - SchlapHappy

"It’s amazing how people comment on how little I weigh, how skinny I am, how I never get fat, how I should eat more, how I must always be hungry, etc. They can fuck off." - tomatoesrfun

"So, you're constantly cold, you can never really build a lot of muscle mass because you can't ever eat enough to gain any weight, people always think you're sick or aren't eating enough, finding clothing that fits is insanely hard. You either look like you're wearing your dads suit that's two sizes to big for you or you shop in the kids section there is almost never any in-between." - reav11

"I was super skinny in school, all the way up to my 30s. As a guy, it's no fun being skinny as skinniness equates to "wimpiness". Dress clothes, suits etc had to be taken in. Girls not looking your way because you're a walking skeleton." - ClownfishSoup

"Being told by other women that I need to shut up and that I'm not allowed to complain about anything. A coworker once said to me, 'You're so skinny, I hate you!' Girl, I'm just over here existing. And being cold." - TheCervus

"Everybody, and I mean fucking everybody, has an opinion about your diet. It's fucking infuriating." - CollateralSandwich

Being naturally skinny is also hard in other, slightly funnier ways that we don't often consider.

Having a bonier physique can be a little uncomfortable at times, to say the least, and finding clothes that fit isn't as easy as you'd think.

"I'm freezing cold all the goddamn time." - GhostPepper87

"Retaining heat. I was born cold, I'll die cold. Fuck the cold," wrote one user.

"I can only own so many warm clothes, and wearing a parka indoors because my workplace won't stop air conditioning even in the winter gets really dumb. The thermostats don't switch to heat mode until mid-winter. In the fall it might be cold out but still on AC, and I'm running a space heater battling with the AC wasting energy to stay warm, even wearing a jacket." - Dragoness42

"Sitting on hard surfaces." - grandoro

"Pants - choose one:

  • stays on your waist
  • covers your ankles" - Flipin75

"Somehow much more difficult to shave concave armpits," joked another user.

How has body positive movement impacted naturally thin people?

burger and fries on white paper Photo by Kisty Mea on Unsplash

Though there's a long way to go, we've made some really good strides as a culture in being accepting of bigger bodies. But it's hard not to wonder how people who are naturally extremely thin feel in a society that constantly tells them the body they were born with is unrealistic, anorexic, weak, and unhealthy.

''Body image issues among naturally thin individuals represent a nuanced and often overlooked aspect of the broader body positivity discourse. Historically, the body positivity movement emerged as a powerful response to societal beauty standards celebrating thin, often unrealistic body types. This evolution has created an interesting paradox for naturally thin individuals," says Kaycie Davis, RMHCI, a mental health therapist at Cannectd Wellness.

"Many naturally thin people report feeling simultaneously invisible and critiqued with unique challenges like being told they look 'unhealthy' or 'fragile.' Some are even being accused of eating disorders and feeling excluded from body-positive conversations."

Davis argues that body positivity should not be about replacing one narrow standard with another, and imagines a world where no one — fat or thin — is judged unfairly or subject to unwanted comments about their size.

"Every body has a right to respect, regardless of size, shape, or appearance."

Popular

Couple in their 30s live permanently on cruise ships for a little over $10K a year

“I’m not a millionaire ... I just live full-time on cruise ships.”

A magnificent cruise ship on the ocean.

Giving it all up and retiring to live on a cruise ship at 32 seems like a lifestyle choice only available to the ultra-wealthy. However, two financially savvy retired school teachers from Tennessee have managed to do just that, spending under $10,000 for the first eight months at sea.

Monica Brzoska, 32, and Jorrell Conley, 36, met in 2015 while teaching in Memphis, Tennessee. The following year, they booked a week-long cruise to Mexico, Belize, and Grand Cayman. After that, they were hooked on cruising together.

Eight years later, in March 2023, they booked a week-long Caribbean cruise. When it was over, instead of returning home to Memphis, they had a wild idea: Why not continue to book consecutive cruises? So, they did just that.

Monica was inspired to start living the life she always wanted after her father fell ill and her mother told her: "Don't wait for retirement. Follow your dreams."



The couple crunched the numbers and found that if they chose the cheapest cabins and used the deals they’ve received from Carnival Cruises, they could book the first 8 months for just under $10,000. “It sounds mad, but the numbers made sense. Accommodation, food and entertainment would be included – we’d only need spending money,” Brzoska told The Sun. “And because we’d been on so many Carnival cruises, we’d earned access to some amazing offers.”

Hopping from ship to ship isn’t difficult for the couple because many disembark from the same ports. But they sometimes have to fly when they can’t walk to the next ocean liner.

The couple then quit their jobs, sold their possessions, and started a new life on the high seas. They rent out their 3-bedroom home in Memphis to maintain steady cash flow. The average 3-bedroom home in the area rents somewhere between $1200 to $1900 a month.



Over the first year of their new life, the couple completed 36 consecutive cruises. They have already visited countless destinations across the globe, but they can’t choose a favorite. "For a cultural experience, we loved Japan," Brzoska told a Carnival Cruise director on Instagram. The couple also loved Greece for its “history” and Iceland because it was the "closest to being on Mars."

One of the most incredible benefits of loving on a cruise ship is that so many things are taken care of for you. The couple never has to cook any meals, do any laundry or drive. Every night, there is something to do, whether it’s checking out a comedy show or enjoying drinks and dancing in the nightclub.



Plus, on cruises, just about all the costs are covered, so you rarely have to open your wallet. It’s a stress-free, all-inclusive lifestyle. Brzoska says that when you remove the everyday stresses from life, it’s great for your marriage. “Without the daily stresses of life, we rarely argued, but always told each other if we needed space or more time together,” she said.

The couple also makes sure to have one date night a week, during which they dress up and have a nice meal together.

Most people may be unable to give it all up and live their lives hopping from ocean liner to ocean liner. But there’s a great lesson in the story of Brzoska and Conley: You never know how much time you have left, so don’t wait for retirement to live the life of your dreams.

Upworthy has reached out to Brzoska for comment and is still awaiting a response.



This article originally appeared in August.

Cayce LaCorte explains why virginity doesn't exist.

The concept of virginity is a very loaded issue in American culture. If a woman loses hers when she's too young she can be slut-shamed. If a man remains a virgin for too long, he can be bullied for not being manly enough. There is also a whole slew of religious mind games associated with virginity that can give people some serious psychological problems associated with sex.

Losing one's virginity has also been blown up way beyond proportion. It's often believed that it's a magical experience—it's usually not. Or that after having sex for the first time people can really start to enjoy living life—not the case. What if we just dropped all of the stigmas surrounding virginity and instead, replaced them with healthy attitudes toward sex and relationships?

Writer Cayce LaCorte is going viral on TikTok for the simple way she's taught her five daughters to think about virginity. They don't have to. LaCorte shared her parenting ideas on TikTok in response to mom-influencer Nevada Shareef's question: "Name something about the way you raised your kids that people think is weird but you think is healthy."

"I'm gonna get a lot of shit for this, but what are you gonna do?" she said in the video. "I'm raising my five daughters to believe that there is no such thing as virginity.

"It is a patriarchal concept used to control women and serves no purpose other than making women feel bad about ourselves," she explained. "Just because some guy randomly sticks his penis in you at some point in your life, it does not change your worth. It does not change who you are. It doesn't do anything other than it happened."

She also responded to those who may criticize her for encouraging promiscuity.

"Sex is important. It's a big deal; it should always be a big deal. It has nothing to do with your first time. It's just ridiculous. The whole concept is ridiculous," the video explained.

She also believes that sex shouldn't be so closely associated with one's moral character.

"I'm raising them to be good people and have solid foundations and make their own choices and make intelligent choices. Not because some book says not to," she concluded the video.

The video made a lot of people realize that virginity is so ingrained in our society that the concept is rarely questioned.

"I never really thought about this to be honest," one commenter wrote. "I will absolutely be adopting this!! Thank you for sharing."

"I have 2 girls, and I think this is how I will teach them when they are older. This would have made me feel more self worth when I was younger," Samantha wrote.

LaCorte's comments about women and virginity need to be heard. But there should also be more discussion around how men also fight the stigma associated with virginity.

There's an unwritten law that says men must lose their virginity by the age of 18 or by at least 21 or that somehow they are less of a man. For men that are virgins into their 20s, "Sex goes from being something to be enjoyed to a giant monolith of titanic proportions that casts a shadow over everything they do and who they are," dating coach Harris O'Malley writes.

Sex is a tricky issue that everyone should be able to approach in their own way, at their own time. It's great that LaCorte's video has gone viral for illustrating the fact that virginity is just another obstacle on the road to sexual maturity that shouldn't factor into whether we decide to have sex or not.

This article originally appeared three years ago.

"America's Got Talent" via YouTube

A little bit of movie magic.

You might not think that ventriloquism is the highest art form in the world. But after watching Celia Muñoz deliver an amazing musical act on “America’s Got Talent,” you might be singing a different tune. First off, her skills are incredible. Muñoz revealed to judges that she had previously worked as a professional opera singer in Spain and had picked up the vaudeville act on a whim.

“Normally people take about 20 years to learn how to do this,” judge Simon Cowell recalled. Muñoz nailed it in two. Second, Muñoz paid an unexpected tribute to another iconic performer in the process, making it all the more special to watch.

Instead of using puppets, Muñoz dressed up the stage to look like a drive-in theater, complete with a shiny red car.

Muñoz approaches the car while talking on the phone to her mother (really talking to herself, of course), popcorn and soda in hand.

“I can’t talk now!” Munoz says before hanging up the phone and settling in.


The “movie” starts playing (again, all voiced by Muñoz) and we realize it's the 1978 classic “Grease.”

- YouTube

Then we hear the beginning notes to “Hopelessly Devoted to You,” originally sung by Olivia Newton-John, who recently passed away on Aug. 8 at the age of 73.

Muñoz somehow manages to sing the song—beautifully, too—all while sipping her soda and eating her movie munchies. Unreal.

The best part comes at the end—with a high note and Muñoz’s mouth absolutely stuffed with popcorn.

Though not seen in this video clip, an episode recap featured on Yahoo! Entertainment showed all the judges floored by Muñoz’s uniqueness and touched by the sweet homage.

Judge Howie Mandel mused that the performance had “given us a glimpse on what would have been if Olivia Newton-John was born in Spain."

No one can say how far Muñoz will go in the competition, but she definitely deserves praise for making the art form entirely her own and giving us new ways to appreciate the classics.


This article originally appeared two years ago.