Here are the 17 funniest, and most unfortunate, names that people have ever heard

Following the smashing television sensation, Succession, and later, Industry, it’s no surprise that everyone is clamoring for their way up the corporate ladder. However, real life is nothing like the glossy—albeit, depressing—floors of Waystar Royco; in the real world there are evil bosses, annoying coworkers, and pesky KPIs that need to be dealt with, leaving many workers wondering, “Is this really what I signed up for?”

That’s at the heart of this question posted to r/careerguidance on Reddit, anyway. User @Ok-Living5146 asked, “What is the secret to some people moving up fast in their careers while others don’t?”

They added some context, writing, “I’ve been in the same ‘level’ of job for years, and it has been frustrating watching people with less experience or less education soar up into these big roles. I’ll often see Directors who have less education or years in the field than I do, or people who randomly shoot up into manager positions or even higher. What exactly is the secret?”

Reddit, as it frequently does, responded in droves. We’ve compiled 10 of the best advice nuggets, below.

  How much does "being good and looking tall" matter in a corporate setting?Photo credit: Canva

“Charisma, communication skills…”

For @fortyeightD, success in a corporate context looks an awful like a grocery shopping list. The user rattles off different attributes to succeeding at work, writing:

“Charisma. Communication skills. Building rapport with the right people. Being good and looking tall. Confidence. Ability to make a decision under pressure. Public speaking skills. Being someone who others respect and look up to. Good grooming and dress sense and hygiene. Being reliable. Being positive and not complaining. Sharing the CEO’s LinkedIn posts. Sucking up. Matching the manager’s biases/preferences for age/race/religion/gender. Giving the appearance of going above and beyond for the company. Nepotism. Attending all social functions and chatting to senior leaders and telling them their ideas are brilliant. Taking on extra responsibilities like joining committees. Working on high-visibility projects. Being the spokesperson in any group situation.”

They also added,

“Record metrics for anything that you work on, so you can tell your manager hard numbers about how you have improved things. For example customer satisfaction, reducing expenses, increasing sales, reducing tickets, etc.”

Easy, right?

Another person jokingly replied, “Yea, I’m not moving up.”

“Be the squeaky wheel”

User @Deep-Library-8041 shared a great anecdote:

“Only thing I’d add is being vocal about career goals and wanting to move up. I was on a small team of three—me and another person with the same title, plus our manager. After getting settled into the role, in our 1:1’s I shared my career goals and asked for help getting there. So over the course of three years she introduced me to people; when an opportunity popped up she put me forward, supported me when I had new ideas, etc. And at each annual review, I put a lot of effort into showing evidence of my growth, ambition, and results.

My colleague stayed silent. She never spoke up, tried to gain visibility, said no to new projects, etc. I know she’s resentful, but people aren’t mind readers. Be the squeaky wheel—know what you want and ask to be coached how to get there.”

Another prescient commenter added,

“Sounds like you had an excellent manager.”

To which, @Deep-Library-8041 replied, “Yes—should edit to add that you need a supportive manager to make this happen!”

“An ongoing problem with yes-men…”

This one unfolded like a duet, told in two parts. The first, from @billsil, who wrote:

“I asked my friend who was in a VP level role at 27. She told me she knew the product top to bottom better than anyone because she had done such a variety of things on it. The CEO trusted her to tell her the truth, which was an ongoing problem of yes-men.

She had quite the target on her back and dealt with a lot of shit from other people, but she only took shots at people who deserved it. Having dealt with them, I was happy someone could put them in their place.”

  If you find a company that values your contributions, you will know. Photo credit: Canva

Then, @tennisgoddes1 replied,

“Spot on for generally any company. If you work at a good company that values your contributions and leadership skills, you will know immediately if you are at one of those companies because your skills will be recognized. Respect for your input and experience will be given. It’s quite refreshing.”

“You do not progress simply because you are good at your work”

A dose of reality, shared by @senpai07373:

“You need to realize one important thing. You do not progress simply because you are good at your work, and you work for many years. If you want to progress, you have to show that you have skills needed to level up job. You can be the most brilliant specialist with 15 years of experience, yet you still might not have the capacity to be manager, not to mention director. Being great at your work can and should give your bonus, can and should get you a raise. But just being great at your work is not the most important thing when you look for progress.”

“Knowing how to play the game…”

Some career coaching, courtesy of @throwawayOnTheWayO (who seems like they read Machiavelli’s The Prince or The Art of War a few hundred times):

“Knowing how to play the game is an extremely valuable skill, the most valuable skill, in fact.

No one cares how long you’ve worked at a company. Why would they? If someone came in and was able to learn in 1 year everything that you did in your 5 years, then more power to them. The state of the company right now is probably nothing like it was 5 years ago, and leadership’s plans for the future may include not wanting anything from the past to keep it down.

Companies that grow and make money do so because of smart decisions by competent leadership. They don’t just happen to make money and happen to stay in business for years or decades on dumb luck. It is not easy to keep a company up and running. Once you recognize that most leaders are actually competent and are dealing with numerous variables that you have no knowledge or understanding of, then you can drop your cynicism and start to move up.

Leadership requires effective social skills and the ability to navigate hierarchies, in addition to the skills necessary to handle the day to day of the job.”

“Career movement itself is a skill”

User @Momjamoms offered some wisdom, commenting:

“Through my decades in corporate America, I've seen lots of people work really really hard hoping they'll be noticed and promoted because they were taught that hard work pays off. In reality, it never works that way. Career movement itself is a skill that requires stellar communication skills and constant, active campaigning.”

To which, another user replied:

“This. It has nothing to do with your ability to do your job. It is all about people skills.”

“Why should they promote you?”

Sometimes, the grass really is greener in the other pasture, reminds user @Ok_Push2550. They wrote,

“Changing jobs.

If you've been there for years (5 or more), and haven't left, why should they promote you? If you're doing well enough to not get fired, then they can hire from outside to get someone with more talent and drive to do something big.

If you go somewhere else, it signals to your new employer (and old employer) that you're not satisfied with what you have, and want more.”

A different user agreed, commenting:

“Exactly this. That is how I got promoted twice over the past 7 years, applying for a better position in two companies. That's also how I doubled my salary while my colleague from the first job is still in the same position even though we started on the same day.”

“Confidence.”

For a more measured, achievable response, look to @OGP01, who wrote:

“Multiple moves into slightly bigger roles. Makes them look experienced.

Building good relationships with senior leaders. Talking to them regularly.

Being known for their team's achievements that they enabled. But at the same time praising members of their team for delivering these results.

Confidence. Being able to bullshit their way through anything, even if they haven’t got a clue what they’re talking about.”

“Build a relationship with someone in the C-Suite…”

Although, if you want a true cheat code, @Willing-Bit2581 has the answer:

“Build a relationship with someone in the C-Suite, that can put you on a track… I've witnessed a 35-year-old woman got from Audit Manager to Sr. Manager to Director to AVP in less than 5 years. She’s clearly being groomed for higher roles.

Saw another woman in late thirties, some went from Sr. Analyst to VP in less than 10 years.”

“Education and experience matter, but they’re table stakes”

Another dose of likeability reality, this time, from @Significant_Soup2558:

“Likability often trumps competence. People promote people they enjoy working with, people who make their lives easier, and people who fit the company culture.

This is how you do it. Favor visibility over competence. Treat networking as part of the job, both within and outside the company. Understand that perception is reality. Be strategic about job changes. Use a service like Applyre to job search passively.

Your education and experience matter, but they're table stakes. The people passing you by figured out that career advancement is a different skill set entirely from doing the actual work well.”

  People skills matter in workplace. Photo credit: Canva

So, will you be taking the advice from these expert corporate Redditors? See you in the C-Suite.