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Joy

What would you say if you could truly converse with your pet? People's answers are so wholesome.

Time for a smile break.

what tail wags mean, different cat purrs, if pets could talk
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"Are you hungry? Do you want outside? WHAT DOES IT MEAN?"

As loving pet owners, we do our best to become highly skilled animal translators. We know that not all meows are created equal. We can sense the difference between a happy tail wag and an anxious one. But still, what if we could just have a conversation with our beloved beasties? What would they say? And what would we ask them?

communicating with pets"Why are they looking at us like that? I know we're cute and all, but..." Photo by Louis-Philippe Poitras on Unsplash

In a since-deleted Reddit post, someone posed this very question. The Reddit user asked:

“You're gifted 24 straight hours where you and your pet are suddenly able to understand each other…What would you want to tell them?”

There were hundreds of responses. Some were lighthearted, like kindly asking to not throw up on the carpet or requesting explanation for [insert odd behavior here]. Others seemed eager to reassure their pets that yes, the vet really is a safe place to be, and no, leaving the house doesn’t mean they’ll be gone forever.

Despite the myriad answers, one theme prevailed: love. For the most part, pet owners have immense fondness for their fur babies, and really do want to provide the best life possible for them. We might not be able to use actual words (doesn’t stop us from using the baby voice though) but we humans will never stop finding different ways to thank our animals for filling our hearts with so much joy.

Enjoy 14 of the funniest, most heartwarming and all around smile-inducing answers:

“I would tell our cat how much we love him and how lovable he is. I would tell him that I value every second with him. I would tell him that we don't let him outside because he has a medical condition not because we choose not to let him outside. I would tell him that we disappear all day, most days, because we have to to earn our keep not because we want to…I would ask him if he is okay and happy, whether he feels well, whether he's in pain at all, what we could do to make him happier. I would stroke and cuddle him the whole time.” -@fishfingerchipbean

“I would reassure my dog that the people walking in the street aren't going to hurt us. Delivery drivers are not evil. The people at the vet are very nice and will never hurt you. They help keep you healthy.” -@FluffySharkBird

“I would profusely apologize for ever stomping on their tails and swear on my mother's life it was always an accident.” -@gudbote

“Talk about dog life and how it’s like…what do they do when left unsupervised, and maybe go on a walk and talk about anything and everything.” -@SecurityCrisis141


“I would love to know what they dream about.” -@Dry-Explanation-9464

what cats think, what dogs think

Dreaming about a utopia of nothing but amazon boxes.

Photo by Aleksandar Cvetanovic on Unsplash

“I think my cat would absolutely ROAST me first for 24 hours.” -@StraberryBob69

“Please let me know how to be a better friend to you because you deserve everything.” -@boywithtwoarms

“I'd ask him about what his life was like before he was picked up by the shelter (he was a stray when they found him). I'd also tell him how proud I am of him learning new things. I'd reassure him that he doesn't need to feel anxious or afraid when he sees other dogs on our walk (he's leash reactive, we're working on it).” -@makuniverse

ask reddit pets

"Will you love me forever?"

Photo by Madeline Bowen on Unsplash

“I'd ask them for their preferences on literally everything. What do they want to eat? What litter do they like? What toys, if any, do they actually enjoy playing with, and how can I make playtime with them more enjoyable? Which nap space is the best? Is the water fountain ever going to get used again, or should I just stick to cups of water laid out on the kitchen floor for them to pick from? Do they enjoy cuddle time at all (or, maybe for my own selfish sake, can i at least get SOME on occasion)?” -@in_the_low_life

“Why do you beg for treats, then sometimes don't even eat them but line them up on your bed in a certain order? And did you really eat that whole chicken, bones and all?” -@Lucinnda

“What’s up with the food thing? Today you love chicken pate and tomorrow it’s poison? WTF?” -Expensive_Ferret-339

if pets could talk

"Hm. No. Ask me again tomorrow."

Photo by Piotr Musioł on Unsplash

“If you need to throw up please get off the bed. Better yet, get on the tile. Love you. Thanks for never scratching the kids when they're being crazy.” -@Likeomgitscrystal

“I love you so much and I would literally die for you, Oh and why do you get zoomies everyday and bite me everytime!!!!!” -@curator_557

“Tbh I would just love to hear her tell stories of her favorite memories from her point of view. Maybe I'd tell her mine too. I really would just like to catch up like old friends lol. Also I would want to tell her that even though we go away on vacation sometimes I hope she knows that we'll always come back because we love her and we miss her lots while we're away.” -@Vanilla_Chinchilla96

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Identity

Study discovers people don't age steadily, but in dramatic bursts at two specific ages

This explains SO much about your 40s.

Photo by Nati/Pexels

If you feel "old" practically overnight, there may be a good reason for that.

Aging is weird. You're trucking along, enjoying your middle-aged life, finally feeling like a real adult, when you look in the mirror one day and gasp.

"Where did those wrinkles come from?"

"Is that skin on my arm…crepey?!?"

"Why am I aching like that?"

Somewhere in your mid-40s, you start noticing obvious signs of aging that seem to arrive overnight. You assume it was a gradual process that you just hadn't noticed, but it sure as heck felt like it happened really fast.

New research indicates that may very well be the case. A study from researchers at Stanford tracked thousands of different molecules in people age 25 to 75 and found that people tend to make two big leaps in aging—one around age 44 and another around age 60. These findings indicate that aging can actually happen in bursts.

“We’re not just changing gradually over time. There are some really dramatic changes,” said senior study author Michael Snyder, Ph.D, geneticist and director of the Center for Genomics and Personalized Medicine at Stanford University. “It turns out the mid-40s is a time of dramatic change, as is the early 60s. And that’s true no matter what class of molecules you look at.”

The researchers assumed the mid-40s changes would be attributed to menopausal or perimenopausal changes in women influencing the overall numbers, but when they separated the results by sex they saw similar changes in men in their 40s.

"“This suggests that while menopause or perimenopause may contribute to the changes observed in women in their mid-40s, there are likely other, more significant factors influencing these changes in both men and women. Identifying and studying these factors should be a priority for future research,” said study author Xiaotao Shen, PhD, a former Stanford Medicine postdoctoral scholar who now teaches at Nanyang Technological University Singapore.

older couple smiling togetherAging happens in bursts, scientists find.Photo by Tristan Le/Pexels

The study included 108 participants who submitted blood and other samples every few months for several years. The scientists tracked age-related changes in 135,000 different molecules—nearly 250 billion distinct data points—to see how aging occurs.

The study may shed light on the reasons for jumps in certain diseases and maladies at certain ages. For the 40-somethings, scientists found significant changes in molecules related to alcohol, caffeine and lipid metabolism; cardiovascular disease; and skin and muscle. For those in their 60s, changes related to carbohydrate and caffeine metabolism, immune regulation, kidney function, cardiovascular disease, and skin and muscle were found.

The study authors did note that lifestyle might play a role in some of these changes. For instance, alcohol metabolism may be influenced by people drinking more heavily in their 40s, which tends to be a period of higher stress for many people. However, the researchers added that these bursts of aging in the mid-40s and early 60s indicate that people may want to pay closer attention to their health around those ages and make lifestyle changes that support greater overall health, such as increasing exercise or limiting alcohol.

The research team plans to study the drivers of these aging bursts to find out why they happen at these ages, but whatever the reasons, it's nice to know that the seemingly sudden onset of age-related woes isn't just in our imaginations.

It's understandable that worry about aging, as physical signs of aging remind us of our own mortality. We also have all kinds of social messaging that tells us youth is ideal and beautiful and old is bad and ugly, so of course we give aging the side-eye. But none of us can avoid aging altogether, so the more positive and healthy we are in our approach to aging is, the better off we'll be, no matter when and to what degree aging hits us.

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Joy

London street artist has a hilarious year-long battle with a graffiti-removal crew

It was a true chess match.

via YouTube

History is full of great stories about bitter battles between loyal opposition. In basketball, there was Magic Johnson and Larry Bird. In the '80s, harsh political battles were fought between Ronald Reagan and Tip O'Neill. But all of these rivals respected their opposition as competitors in their respective fields. Now, a year-long battle between a cleaning crew and a street artist can be added to history's legendary battles between loyal opposition.

Mobstr is a London-based street artist famous for the sarcastic typographic-based graffiti he's written across London's walls and billboards. His cat-and-mouse relationship with an unidentified city worker began on July 17, 2014, and would continue for an entire year.

"I cycled past this wall on the way to work for years," Mobstr wrote on his website. " I noticed that graffiti painted within the red area was 'buffed' with red paint. However, graffiti outside of the red area would be removed via pressure washing. This prompted the start of an experiment. Unlike other works, I was very uncertain as to what results it would yield.”

Watch the video below and see what happens:

This article originally appeared on 09.23.17.

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Family

Psychologist shares 15-second trick to make kids of any age less rude and more cooperative

All it takes is a single question.

via Hunter Johnson/Unsplash

A child being rude.

Sometimes, it can feel like half of parenting is repeating yourself over and over again, asking your child to brush their teeth or take a dish from the living room to the sink. It’s exhausting and makes you feel like a nag. Don't you wish there was a simple way to make your kids listen the first time?

Dr. Rebecca Kennedy, aka “Dr. Becky,” is a clinical psychologist and founder and CEO of Good Inside who says she has a quick way to make your kids more cooperative and less rude. Talk about killing two soul-crushing birds with one parenting stone.

Dr. Beckly got into psychology after growing up with anorexia as a teenager.

“Okay, no matter how old your kid is, you can use this 15-second tip to decrease rudeness and increase cooperation,” she says in a TikTok video with over 32,000 views. “Find your child today and ask them this question. 'Hey, I was just wondering, what could I do better as your parent?'”

The psychologist says that even if the child has a random or impractical answer such as “Let me stay up ‘til midnight” or “I’d like to eat macaroni and cheese for breakfast, lunch and dinner,” just to listen. Simply by listening, you can change your child’s behavior.

She says we should also ask more questions to further the conversation: “Tell me more. What would that be like?”

Want to improve your relationship with your kid in less than 15 seconds? Watch this reel for a quick-win strategy. 

@drbeckyatgoodinside

Want to improve your relationship with your kid in less than 15 seconds? Watch this reel for a quick-win strategy. The best part: When we use strategies like this in calm moments, we reduce the frequency of difficult moments with our kids. Of course, I’m a realist… I know you need in-the-moment strategies too! Cue: My Conquering Problem Behaviors Workshop. You’ll get an entire toolbox of in-the-moment and outside-the-moment strategies for reducing outbursts and strengthening your bond with your kid. Learn more in the link in bio!

“I mean, imagine your boss coming to you randomly and asking how they could be a better manager to you. Just by asking the question and listening,” she continued. Dr. Becky says that asking our kids how we’re doing as parents communicates three essential ideas: “I care about you. I respect you. I'm invested in this relationship.”

This type of questioning builds a connection with a child that can spill over into other behaviors. “You're building connection. And with more connection always comes more cooperation,” she ends the video.

The big takeaway from the video is that when we enhance our connection with our kids, they will be less likely to disobey or be rude because they feel heard and respected, so there’s no need to act out. They will also return that respect by listening to you when you have a request, such as taking out the trash or putting down their phone and coming to dinner.

Some people in the comments got funny responses when they asked their kids what they could improve. “I asked my 5yr old. I got a mildly scathing look and she said ‘erm, maybe try and burn dinner less next time?’” Collette wrote. “My 5 yo told me to look better and get a haircut,” Mark Amend added.

Dr. Becky’s quick question is a great way for parents to strengthen their relationships when things are going well instead of trying to forge connections during conflict. It’s a great reminder that even when parenting, an ounce of prevention is a pound of cure.

Dr. Becky sums up the importance of prevention in her TikTok caption: “When we use strategies like this in calm moments, we reduce the frequency of difficult moments with our kids,” she wrote.


This article originally appeared on 6.6.24

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Science

She tattooed half her face and you'd never know it. Her skills are just that good.

This incredible medical tattoo technology is giving renewed hope to burn victims.

All images via the CBS/YouTube

Basma Hameed runs a tattoo shop, of sorts...


Meet Samira Omar.

The 17-year-old was the victim of a horrific bullying incident.


A group of girls threw boiling water on her, leaving her badly burned and covered in scars and discoloration.

tattoo shop, hate crime, artistry

17-year-old Samira Omar

All images by CBC News/YouTube

She thought the physical scars would be with her forever — until she met Basma Hameed. Basma Hameed runs a tattoo shop, of sorts — but her tattoo artistry doesn't look like you'd expect. Basma is a paramedical tattoo specialist. Instead of tattooing vibrant, colorful designs, she uses special pigments that match the skin in order to conceal scars.

It looks like this:

human condition, diversity, equality

Basma looking at Samira’s facial scarring.

assets.rebelmouse.io

disabilities, health, reproductive rights,

Basma talking over the procedure.

assets.rebelmouse.io

body image, scarring, community

Visible scars and discoloration of the skin.

assets.rebelmouse.io

humanity, culture, treatment

Tattooing the visible scarring on her hand

assets.rebelmouse.io

With Basma's help, patients like Samira can see a dramatic decrease in their scar visibility and discoloration after a few treatments. She even offers free procedures for patients who are unable to afford treatment. That's because Basma knows firsthand just how life-changing her work can be for those coping with painful scars left behind.

Check out the video below to find out more about Basma's practice, including how she became her very first patient.

This article originally appeared on 01.12.15

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Family

The 3 things you learn after your mother dies.

Love you, Mom. ❤️

Image from Pixabay.

I still miss her.


My mother died from ovarian cancer when I was a young child.

I'm in my late 30s now, and I'm still navigating this loss as I move through life. I've lived most of my life without my mother at this point, but I still miss her.

Here are three things I've learned since losing Mam:

1. Grief is not linear and is not solely expressed through tears.

Someone you love has been taken away from you, and your heart has broken into pieces. It's natural to grieve, but we all grieve differently. Grief shows up in anger, sorrow, guilt, fear, and sometimes peace. It is unpredictable and, at times, exhausting.

I cried when my mother died, and I cried at her funeral when my school choir sang "Be Not Afraid." I didn't cry much in the immediate years that followed — not directly as a result of Mam's death, but probably indirectly related to it. I certainly felt fear and anger and other emotions related directly to my loss.

Then sadness hit me like a ton of bricks one day when I was in my early 20s. A compassionate friend asked me about Mam, and as I hadn't spoken about her to anyone outside the family, I broke down. It was a good release. The years have brought many stages of grieving.

Mother's Day is never easy. Shopping for my wedding dress without my mother brought up intense feelings of loss. And sometimes it just hits me hard, on a regular day, yanking me out of my pleasant thoughts. A mother in a dressing room with her daughter, and they're trying on clothes together, admiring how the other looks. The mother telling the daughter how beautiful she is.

Or a friend of mine, meeting her mother for lunch and Ican't even imagine what that would be like! I can't even fathom the amazing joy of having lunch right now with Mam! And then I get that heaviness in my chest and my stomach feels bad.

There's no closure. My grieving stems from having loved so deeply. I have learned to tune into the emotions I'm feeling and to acknowledge the love, the pain, and the loss.

2. There are no replacements.

Nobody can replace your mother. We love our mothers in our own individual ways. Our mothers care for us when we're sick, guide us in life the best ways they can, listen to us, and love us unconditionally.

For a mother, her child is always her first priority. And we sense this. We feel it. We know it, even if she doesn't say it.

moms, daughter, parents, motherhood, love

I was told that she called me her little angel.

Photo provided by author Carmel Breath.

My mother was beyond happy when I was born a healthy baby girl. I was told that she called me her little angel. She carried me in her womb for nine months.

By the time I was born, we had that unbreakable bond, and she knew me from that first second of my existence. There's never going to be a replacement for that person who loved me probably more than she loved herself. The joy in her eyes when she saw me, the warmth of her arms wrapped around me, the pain in her eyes when she had to say goodbye are all ways that I remember the deep love she had for me.

Mam prepared lunches for me every day to take to school, named muffins after me because they were my favorite, and surprised me with the best doll she could find when I was a few years old. She repaired my soft toys when they tore, taught me to have manners and sit up straight, wiped my eyes when I cried and my nose when I was sick.

Today I look for certain qualities in people. I look for a warmth, a radiance, a compassion and kindness that Mam had. I look for humor, a voice of sense, and strength of character. These are traits that my mother had. I find some of them in others.

But it's never the same. There'll never be another Mam. She's irreplaceable on so many levels.

3. There are other people who will love you and other people for you to love.

Family members and friends will love you. They might not know exactly what your needs are or how to address them, but it's worth reaching out to them. People struggle with different things.

Perhaps family members cannot love you or be there for you, and we may have to look around, let go, and reach further than we might want to in order to find the people who really love us, but there is someone out there to love you, and there's someone in need of your love.

I was blessed with the kindest, most devoted father who gave my brother and me all the love and care we needed. My dad is a gem in my life. He calls me to hear my news and to share his. He worries when I'm not feeling good and is overjoyed when I'm happiest. He listens to my concerns and trusts me to make the right decisions.

My dad has helped me so much in dealing with my loss, through caring for me and loving me unconditionally. I have the most wonderful fiancé who loves me to no end. And I've friends in my life who I know truly care about me.

I've been blessed with a lovely family, but it doesn't mean that I don't reach out to others. I've reconnected with old friends after years of distance. I've discovered things I have in common with others and opened up to new friendships.

Having people to love is truly healing. I was a kindergarten teacher for 10 years. I loved the children in my care, and they showed me so much love in return. By spreading love, we invite more love into our lives. Try volunteering or working in a school or a hospital. There are people everywhere in need of love.


Our world is so big and yet so small now in this age of technology. We can reach out to others across continents.

Our mothers were the first to show us the true meaning of love. In honor of our mothers, let's spread that love wherever we can.


This article was written by Carmel Breathnach and originally appeared on March 5, 2017

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