Gen X mom shares the revelations she got after her son gave her an ultimatum
If she didn't go to therapy, they would have no contact.
One Gen X shares some amazing revelations she had in therapy
Not that long ago, the thought of adult children choosing estrangement from their parents would have been seen as fairly atypical, even if their parents engaged in toxic behavior. But now, many trauma-informed millennials and Gen Zers are going the low-to-no-contact route—as many as 25% of young adults, according to The Hill.
But even if it is becoming more common, that doesn’t mean it’s an easy choice to make. It often comes after multiple failed attempts to improve communication, set healthy boundaries and establish a healthy dynamic.
And for many older parents, who didn’t grow up with nearly as much readily available mental health information, being asked to take accountability by their children can be triggering. So then stubbornness sets in, disguising itself as “not being controlled.” This leaves no one really getting what they want though, which is, presumably, a parent-child relationship.
But if older parents can find it within themselves to do the work their children desperately ask for, and try to come at the situation with an open mind rather than being defensive, healing is possible. Just take this mom’s word for it.
As one Gen X mom (who goes by @fiftiesrediscovery or Fabulous Fifties) shared on TikTok, her adult son gave her an ultimatum: go to therapy or there would be no contact.
One viewer asked this mom how she could discern whether an ultimatum like this was actually abuse. Fabulous Fifties completely understood where this person was coming from.
"I so get this. Because when I started this journey, I thought that same thing," she said, adding that she expected her kids to “step up in some way” in exchange for her agreeing to therapy.
So Fabulous Fifties went to fix a relationship with her son. Or so she thought. In actuality, she got to work on herself. And in that process, many things began to click.
"We started digging into my trauma, and I went, oh, wait a minute, my mom was traumatized. And then she handed it down to me, and then I handed it down to my kids,” she shared. “And now the relationship between me and my kids is like this.”
@fiftiesrediscovery Replying to @treefairy5 #healingtrauma #traumatherapy #intergenerationaltrauma ♬ original sound - Fabulous fifties!!
“Why is that?" she said, answering that younger generations have “access to mental health information” her generation simply did not, making them more able to spot and respond to harmful patterns, rather than internalize them like many older age groups have been forced to.
"They know what toxic is. They understand what trauma is. And even if they haven't worked their way out of that trauma yet, they know what a toxic mom is."
After having these types of revelations and continuing to do the work on herself, the relationship between Fabulous Fifties and her son began to repair itself naturally. She was even able to help her kids heal, simply by healing herself.
Furthermore, it gave her a better understanding of her son’s given ultimatum. Instead of labeling it as “abuse,” she now recognizes it as “trauma.”
“They weren't abusing me. They were coming from a place of pain,” she said, even being able to own that the source of the pain were mistakes she made as a mom.
Fabulous Fifties now considers herself a cycle breaker of generational trauma, and helps others on similar journeys by sharing what she’s learned along the way.
Coming face-to-face with our shadows and rewriting years upon years of subconscious patterns isn’t an easy, comfortable or even short process. But this story shows that it can be extremely worthwhile, if only we can muster the courage and patience to do it.
A Generation Jones teenager poses in her room.Image via Wikmedia Commons
An office kitchen.via 
An angry man eating spaghetti.via 
Gif of baby being baptized
Woman gives toddler a bath Canva
An Irish woman went to the doctor for a routine eye exam. She left with bright neon green eyes.
It's not easy seeing green.
Did she get superpowers?
Going to the eye doctor can be a hassle and a pain. It's not just the routine issues and inconveniences that come along when making a doctor appointment, but sometimes the various devices being used to check your eyes' health feel invasive and uncomfortable. But at least at the end of the appointment, most of us don't look like we're turning into The Incredible Hulk. That wasn't the case for one Irish woman.
Photographer Margerita B. Wargola was just going in for a routine eye exam at the hospital but ended up leaving with her eyes a shocking, bright neon green.
At the doctor's office, the nurse practitioner was prepping Wargola for a test with a machine that Wargola had experienced before. Before the test started, Wargola presumed the nurse had dropped some saline into her eyes, as they were feeling dry. After she blinked, everything went yellow.
Wargola and the nurse initially panicked. Neither knew what was going on as Wargola suddenly had yellow vision and radioactive-looking green eyes. After the initial shock, both realized the issue: the nurse forgot to ask Wargola to remove her contact lenses before putting contrast drops in her eyes for the exam. Wargola and the nurse quickly removed the lenses from her eyes and washed them thoroughly with saline. Fortunately, Wargola's eyes were unharmed. Unfortunately, her contacts were permanently stained and she didn't bring a spare pair.
- YouTube youtube.com
Since she has poor vision, Wargola was forced to drive herself home after the eye exam wearing the neon-green contact lenses that make her look like a member of the Green Lantern Corps. She couldn't help but laugh at her predicament and recorded a video explaining it all on social media. Since then, her video has sparked a couple Reddit threads and collected a bunch of comments on Instagram:
“But the REAL question is: do you now have X-Ray vision?”
“You can just say you're a superhero.”
“I would make a few stops on the way home just to freak some people out!”
“I would have lived it up! Grab a coffee, do grocery shopping, walk around a shopping center.”
“This one would pair well with that girl who ate something with turmeric with her invisalign on and walked around Paris smiling at people with seemingly BRIGHT YELLOW TEETH.”
“I would save those for fancy special occasions! WOW!”
“Every time I'd stop I'd turn slowly and stare at the person in the car next to me.”
“Keep them. Tell people what to do. They’ll do your bidding.”
In a follow-up Instagram video, Wargola showed her followers that she was safe at home with normal eyes, showing that the damaged contact lenses were so stained that they turned the saline solution in her contacts case into a bright Gatorade yellow. She wasn't mad at the nurse and, in fact, plans on keeping the lenses to wear on St. Patrick's Day or some other special occasion.
While no harm was done and a good laugh was had, it's still best for doctors, nurses, and patients alike to double-check and ask or tell if contact lenses are being worn before each eye test. If not, there might be more than ultra-green eyes to worry about.