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A hopeful, open letter to Susan Collins from someone who worked hard to defeat you

A hopeful, open letter to Susan Collins from someone who worked hard to defeat you

I have something I would like to say to you, Senator Susan Collins.

My name is Tim Mercer. Yes, the same Mercer who's mother appeared in an ad on television opposing you this past election. And yes, the same Mercer who's brother put out multiple full page ads in the Portland Press Herald and got national attention when you refused to answer his questions in an airport a year ago. But before you tune me out, I would like you to hear me out. Some things might be hard to hear, but I assure you there is a light at the end of this tunnel.

First off, I would like to congratulate you on your decisive win over Sarah Gideon to retain your seat as senator for the great state of Maine: a state my family calls home—a place I have lived for over 10 years of my life. Even though I have disagreed with you on most issues, you have potential to be the best person for the job. Not for the senator you are right now, but for who you could be.

Over the past few days, I've discussed your voting record, position on issues and your commitment to Maine and the United States with numerous people who work with you and held positions within the walls of the state capitol in Augusta, ME. In recent years, I had become disenchanted with your ways, and full disclosure, I was going to write you an angry letter. But as I heard these people talk about you, I realized that you have their respect. The people who disagree with you had some good things to say, as did those who are more alined with you. They were all very candid, so there were no perfect scores, but that is okay. I don't trust perfect.

With every conversation I had, there was one consistent tone: hope.


You clearly have something special with the people of Maine based on your tenure as their representative spanning over two decades. Not only that, but you won convincingly as a Republican in a state that favored Democrat, Joe Biden, as their choice for the next president of the United States. You are clearly doing something right. But you have done some things wrong, too. The first thing that comes to mind is Justice Brett Kavanaugh.

This was your opportunity for that career-defining moment. But instead you voted for Kavanaugh in 2018. Eight months later, you told the New York Times you didn't regret that decision. Why? I know you received harsh criticism, and I understand where it came from. In supporting Kavanaugh, you've threatened the safety of women and their right to choose. With your pro-choice views, which we agree on, you were the Republican that should have voted against Kavanaugh. I am not sure if you were pressured or made some sort of deal with Trump, but either way it wasn't a good look.

Although you claim to be a champion for women's rights, when the national spotlight was on you, you disappointed a large amount of people. It was your chance at the big solo and we were expecting to hear this glorious note, but instead, we got Selena Gomez without the auto tune. You could have knocked it out of the park by making a decision that would forever put you down in the books for standing against alleged sexual assault. I wonder if you regret that decision now?

Then there's your bipartisan voting. It seems that you are able to boast a bipartisan voting record because you side with Democrats when your vote has no impact on the final result. That is like purposely putting your credit card down at a restaurant after someone else just footed the bill. It is a hollow gesture that has no effect on the situation, costs you nothing and makes it seem like you genuinely meant to do the right thing. When you are called out for voting the party line, you can just point to your record to show how often you have gone against the Republican narrative. Similarly, the person with the second fastest credit card reflex at an eating establishment, when accused of never picking up the tab, can always point out how many times they have tried to pay. Technically, neither of you are wrong, but I am sure you can see how it isn't right.

Another aspect of your voting that's troublesome to many is your voting record for taxing the wealthy. I was talking to a friend of mine a few weeks ago, and while he is a multi-millionaire, he says he only pays 4% in taxes. I pay over 20% (and let's just say I am not expecting an American Express Black card to show up in the mail anytime soon). According to Politicsthatwork.com, you vote to tax the wealthy only 18.2% of the time. I understand there might be a margin of error on those statistics, but I am pretty sure it isn't 81.8%. There are so many hard working people in the state of Maine and across the country who desperately need your help.

Also, I do find it strange that you haven't held a town hall meeting in 20 years. As a woman of the people, which you claim to be, I don't understand why you wouldn't be eager to hear our voices much less avoid them. Then I heard something interesting that every single person I talked to who worked with you confirmed. You have a reputation for having thin-skin. Face-to-face adversity appears to be difficult for you. There was even someone who organized an event that you spoke at, recalling your extremely unusual request to see the RSVP list so you could seemingly vet them. Speakers look at those list all the time out of curiosity, but this was different. My guess is that you probably know what I am referring to. My point is that I think I understand you a little better now. You seem to want to control your environment. Perhaps you should let go of that and start holding town halls more often. You might take a few lumps, but you will also get plenty of praise from your supporters—especially if you take more steps to look Mainers in the eye and connect on a human level.

Finally, I need to ask this because I would be remiss if I didn't: Is the support you have shown for President Trump over the past four years genuine?

I know the Overton Window moves left and right, but Trump has found a way to make it move down. In other words, statements and actions so juvenile, rude and completely baseless used to mean the end of a political career. For President Trump, it is known as "every day of the week." I challenge you to find a 30 second clip from any of Trump's rallies where he doesn't insult someone or make it about himself. The man has successfully divided the United States of America to a level I never thought possible, and that is not an easy thing to do.

I find it hard to believe that you, a public servant for 23 years, doesn't cringe on an hourly basis about the fact that you have to report to a misogynistic narcissist with no political experience, who doesn't pay his taxes and has the bed side manner of Triumph The Insult Comic Dog. You will soon be free of him, and you will have a chance to work with the Biden administration, a president who possess dignity and values. You might not always agree, but at least it will be an adult conversation.


The gridlock in Washington is the most dysfunctional it has ever been by far. You know this, Susan. You have a front row seat. You could be the spark that leads to a different way of thinking. This country was so desperate for anything other than business-as-usual in our federal government that they elected Donald Trump, and continued to convince themselves that his behavior wasn't that of a spoiled five-year old who needs attention. All the time.

People need to remember that you were a maverick in years past. I believe you can get back the ear of the Democratic constituents you lost and keep the Republican ones so loyal to you. Someone has to break this seemingly endless and profoundly dangerous cycle of behavior on Capitol Hill. There needs to be a first, and I really think you could be her. Forget about who is Democrat and who is Republican, and lead by example. Someone needs to step up and it may as well be you. We as Americans know the difference between disingenuous actions and those that are pure of heart. If you lead the way, people like my mother, my brother and I will all be right behind you.

By the way, I also think I understand why you didn't (or couldn't) answer my brother's questions when he approached you in that airport last year. Maybe it is because you couldn't in good conscience give an answer when he asked questions like, "What do I say to my daughter when president uses language on a daily basis that would get her kicked out of school?" Maybe it is because you couldn't justify it either, but you had to be loyal to your party. Those days are behind you and you made it through. You have the next six years to get your "maverick" on and make a difference. And I can't wait to see what you do.

This country has too much potential to keep going down a path where the best case scenario is everyone being consistently angry and growing even more divided. The worst case scenario is all-out civil war, which doesn't seem far fetched enough at this point. President Trump's version of unity is telling militia groups like The Proud Boys to "stand by," and it is scary to think about what that might lead to. Those guys seem like the kind of fellas that could cause a great deal of chaos. I do believe we all want the same thing: freedom, unity and the pursuit of happiness. We have dug ourselves quite a hole, but Susan, if you can be the catalyst that pulls us out of it, you will be one of the most important trailblazers in political history.

Make America great again, because the last guy who preached those words kind of went the other way on that one. If you can pull this off, even if you put your credit card out first, I will be the first one to buy you dinner.

shhh, quiet, zip it, mouth closed, say nothing, be quiet

A woman zipping up her lips.

There are times to speak up, moments when it’s best to say nothing, and opportunities be very considerate in your response. But when you’re on the receiving end of a back-handed compliment, a foolish remark, or a coworker takes you down a peg, and your emotions are up, it can be hard to have a thoughtful response. Often, we say something we shouldn’t.

How is it that some folks fly off the handle and say things they’ll later regret, while others can stay calm and remove themselves from the situation or take the high ground? One way to be less impulsive with your words is to use the “name it to tame it” neuroscience hack, originally coined by author and psychiatrist Dr. Dan Siegel. When used properly, it allows you to step back from the moment and choose the best response in a challenging situation.


shhh, quiet, zip it, mouth closed, say nothing, be quiet A man saying "be quiet."via Canva/Photos

How to use the ‘name it to tame it’ hack

When someone upsets you, the first thing to do is to go inside yourself and describe the emotion that you feel in your body. Are you angry? Are you sad? Are you afraid? Do you feel rejected? Are you disappointed? The moment you name the emotion, it will begin to subside and give you the emotional and mental room to respond to the person who caused the negative emotion, rather than impulsively reacting.

How to respond to a reactive emotion so you don’t fly off the handle:

Event happens:

1. Your body stiffens up

2. You feel an intense emotion

3. You examine the emotion and give it a name: “My body is telling me I am angry.”

4. You should feel the emotion beginning to subside

5. Choose your response instead of being impulsive

shhh, quiet, zip it, mouth closed, say nothing, be quiet A woman zipping up her mouth.via Canva/Photos

Why does ‘name it to tame it’ work?

“Name it to tame it” works because, when we have a strong emotional reaction, our lizard brain kicks in, and we go into fight, flight, or freeze mode. The lizard brain is not known for giving thoughtful and strategic responses to challenging situations. When we name the emotion, our prefrontal cortex, or the thinking brain, kicks in. The thinking brain looks at the situation and says, “Alright, we don’t need to run or fight here. It's best to give a strategic response.”

When we tune into the negative emotions by naming them, they relax because they feel heard, like when a child has hurt their knee or a loved one has real concern and you gives them undivided attention. Once the emotions are named, they are tamed. Then, you are more likely to respond to the negative person with grace and speak from the best part of yourself.

Dr. Dan Siegel, who coined the phrase “Name it to tame it,” explains the brain science behind the technique in the video below. He does a great job of explaining how it allows us to transfer our thoughts from the downstairs brain (the lizard brain) to the upstairs brain (the thinking brain), so we can calm down and respond appropriately to the situation.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

tipping culture debate, server tip note receipt, Lionell Carr Threads viral, restaurant tipping 2026, tipping etiquette US, Pew Research tipping survey, server minimum wage tips, cash tip restaurant, tipping fatigue America, viral restaurant receipt
Canva

A restaurant customer looks at his bill

Lionell Carr (@lionellsaidit2) stopped for breakfast while traveling over the holidays. His bill came to $33.06. He paid on the card, leaving the tip line blank because he planned to leave cash on the table. Before he could, the bill came back.

Written on the receipt in bold red letters: "Learn to TIP. It's not my job to serve you FOR FREE!"


Carr posted a photo of it to Threads last December, with a caption that summed up his reaction: "On my holiday travels, I stopped and had breakfast. this occurred afterwards. I was gonna leave a cash tip......" He added, "These servers are out of control, a lot of times they blocked their blessings for greed!"

The post has since pulled in 4.5 million views, according to Newsweek, and the comment section became exactly what you'd expect: a full-scale argument about one of the most reliably combustible topics in American public life.

On one side, people who felt the server crossed a line. "If you're not getting paid by your EMPLOYER, that's your fault. Tipping is OPTIONAL," wrote @gaga.looie. @trice_the_bea added, "U.S.A. should start learning how to pay its workers. Tips should be a reward for kind service, not their paycheck."

On the other, people who felt the server's frustration was completely understandable given the economic reality behind it. "greed? in U.S. servers get a base salary of $2.13/hour on average," wrote @lucy.vard. "The majority of the money they make is tips. We can argue that the system is broken, and restaurant owners should pay their employees, and, while valid, it's a different point. This is how system works, and we shouldn't punish people for the system's imperfection."

tipping culture debate, server tip note receipt, Lionell Carr Threads viral, restaurant tipping 2026, tipping etiquette US, Pew Research tipping survey, server minimum wage tips, cash tip restaurant, tipping fatigue America, viral restaurant receipt YouTube

Both responses capture something true, which is probably why this post keeps spreading.

The structural reality is that the American tipping system puts servers and customers in an uncomfortable position that neither of them created. According to a 2023 Pew Research Center survey, 72% of U.S. adults say they are being asked to tip in more places than five years ago. More Americans oppose businesses suggesting tip amounts (40%) than support it (24%). And 77% of diners say the quality of service is their primary factor in deciding how much to tip, which means a server's income is perpetually attached to variables outside their control.

That pressure is real. So is the frustration of a customer who genuinely intended to leave cash and got a lecture in red ink before he had the chance.

What makes this story harder to resolve than it looks is that the server's note wasn't wrong about the economics. It was just aimed at the wrong person. The broken part of the system isn't the customer who leaves cash instead of a card tip. It's the system that pays servers $2.13 an hour and asks both parties to sort out the rest between themselves.

@azjohnsons put it plainly in the comments: "Tips are their salary. Not a blessing. They worked and should be paid. Sorry for the frustrated note but I get it."

That might be the most honest sentence in the whole thread.

tipping culture debate, server tip note receipt, Lionell Carr Threads viral, restaurant tipping 2026, tipping etiquette US, Pew Research tipping survey, server minimum wage tips, cash tip restaurant, tipping fatigue America, viral restaurant receipt YouTube

You can follow Lionell Carr (@lionellsaidit2) on Instagram Threads for more content on lifestyle.

This article originally appeared earlier this year.

arthur c. brooks, harvard, psychology, happiness research, bucket list

Harvard researcher Arthur C. Brooks studies what leads to human happiness.

We live in a society that prizes ambition, celebrating goal-setting, and hustle culture as praiseworthy vehicles on the road to success. We also live in a society that associates successfully getting whatever our hearts desire with happiness. The formula we internalize from an early age is that desire + ambition + goal-setting + doing what it takes = a successful, happy life.

But as Harvard University happiness researcher Arthur C. Brooks has found, in his studies as well as his own experience, that happiness doesn't follow that formula. "It took me too long to figure this one out," Brooks told podcast host Tim Ferris, explaining why he uses a "reverse bucket list" to live a happier life.


bucket list, wants, desires, goals, detachment Many people make bucket lists of things they want in life. Giphy

Brooks shared that on his birthday, he would always make a list of his desires, ambitions, and things he wanted to accomplish—a bucket list. But when he was 50, he found his bucket list from when he was 40 and had an epiphany: "I looked at that list from when I was 40, and I'd checked everything off that list. And I was less happy at 50 than I was at 40."

As a social scientist, he recognized that he was doing something wrong and analyzed it.

"This is a neurophysiological problem and a psychological problem all rolled into one handy package," he said. "I was making the mistake of thinking that my satisfaction would come from having more. And the truth of the matter is that lasting and stable satisfaction, which doesn't wear off in a minute, comes when you understand that your satisfaction is your haves divided by your wants…You can increase your satisfaction temporarily and inefficiently by having more, or permanently and securely by wanting less."

Brooks concluded that he needed a "reverse bucket list" that would help him "consciously detach" from his worldly wants and desires by simply writing them down and crossing them off.

"I know that these things are going to occur to me as natural goals," Brooks said, citing human evolutionary psychology. "But I do not want to be owned by them. I want to manage them." He discussed moving those desires from the instinctual limbic system to the conscious pre-frontal cortex by examining each one and saying, "Maybe I get it, maybe I don't," but crossing them off as attachments. "And I'm free…it works," he said.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

"When I write them down, I acknowledge that I have the desire," he explained on X. "When I cross them out, I acknowledge that I will not be attached to this goal."

The idea that attachment itself causes unhappiness is a concept found in many spiritual traditions, but it is most closely associated with Buddhism. Mike Brooks, PhD, explains that humans need healthy attachments, such as an attachment to staying alive and attachments to loved ones, to avoid suffering. But many things to which we are attached are not necessarily healthy, either by degree (over-attachment) or by nature (being attached to things that are impermanent).

"We should strive for flexibility in our attachments because the objects of our attachment are inherently in flux," Brooks writes in Psychology Today. "In this way, we suffer unnecessarily when we don't accept their impermanent nature."

What Arthur C. Brooks suggests that we strive to detach ourselves from our wants and desires because the simplest way to solve the 'haves/wants = happiness' formula is to reduce the denominator. The reverse bucket list, in which you cross off desires before you fulfill them, can help free you from attachment and lead to a happier overall existence.

This article originally appeared last year.

Joy

A man tried to fix a female golfer's swing. He didn't know she was a PGA pro.

“What you are doing there … you shouldn’t be doing that.”

mansplaining, golf, swing change golf, humor, golfing, sports, athletes, female athletes, womens sports, sexism
Representative Image from Canva

A man tried to tell a pro golfer she was swing too slow.

We’re all probably familiar with the term “mansplaining,” when a man explains something to a woman in a condescending or patronizing way. Often, this takes the form of a man explaining a subject to a woman who already knows it at an expert level. The female neuroscientist who was told by a man that she should read a research paper she actually wrote comes to mind.

Often, mansplaining can show up in small interactions that minimize or infantilize a woman's knowledge and expertise. It can be a man spouting off facts because he thinks it makes him seem interesting, or giving unsolicited fitness advice at the gym in a poorly disguised flirting attempt. But sometimes the irony at play is just too much to bear. Frankly, it's often delicious.


In 2024, some next-level mansplaining was caught in the wild. Georgia Ball, a professional golfer and coach who’s racked up over 3 million likes on TikTok for all her tips and tricks of the sport, was minding her own business while practicing a swing change at the driving range.


golf, practice tee, driving range, range balls, golf clubs People practicing on the driving range. via Canva/Photos

A man tries to give a female PGA pro golf tips

It takes all of two seconds on Google to see that when it comes to incorporating a swing change, golfers need to swing slower, at 50-75% their normal speed…which is what Ball was doing. And this is what prompted some man to insert his “advice.”

In the clip, we hear the man say “What you are doing there … you shouldn’t be doing that.” Exhibiting the patience of a nun, Ball simply tells him that she’s going through a swing change. But her attempts at reason are unfortunately interrupted, multiple times, when the man repeatedly assures her that, since he’s been playing golf for 20 years, he knows what he’s talking about.

He then insists, repeatedly cutting her off, that she’s going too slow on her swing and should be following through. Cue Ball’s incredulous look to the camera.

Watch the whole, cringe-inducing interaction here:

@georgiagolfcoach

Can you believe he said this? 😳⛳️👀 #golf #golfswing #golflife #golftok #golftiktok #golfer #golfing #golfgirl #golfpro #golftips #golfclub #drivingrange


Hoping to appease him, Ball finally gives a hearty swing, writing “I knew I had to make this a good one” on the onscreen text. As the ball sails through the air, the man says, “See how much better that was?" completely taking credit for her swing. Which is hilarious because she didn't change a thing she was doing.

Poor Ball then tries to tell him that even the “best players in the world” slow down their swing when going through a swing change. And she'd know. Not only is she a golf coach, but she's also a certified PGA professional. “No, I understand what you’re saying, but I’ve been playing golf for 20 years,” the man repeats. At this point, Ball is just “trying to keep it together.”

golf group, fiarway, co-ed golf group, tee time, links A group of people playing golf. via Canva/Photos

People in the comments couldn't handle the mansplaining

Sure, this guy might not have known who Ball was, but it’s pretty evident that the last thing she needed was this guy’s “advice.” And thus, the “mansplaining” jokes commenced in the comments section.

Here’s a small sampling:

“As a guy, this is the first time I’ve ever seen ‘mansplaining’ happen.”

“The way he took credit for your next swing.”

“But did you consider that he’s been playing golf for 20 years?”

“*implement nothing he says* ‘See how much better that was’ HAHAHAHAH.”

“My hope is that he comes across this video and it keeps him up at night."

Others couldn’t help but praise Ball for keeping her cool.

“He doesn’t even give you a chance to explain, just forces his opinion and advice onto you. Goon on you for staying calm and polite,” one person wrote. Of course, others felt Ball was being “too nice” to the man. One even exclaimed, “there’s no reason to be so polite!”

Ball told BBC that it wouldn't be in her nature to shut the man down harshly, even if that's what he deserved. "I wouldn't interrupt and say that," she says. "I suppose it's just the humble side of me."


@georgiagolfcoach

Play a hole with me ⛳️🏌🏽‍♂️25mph wind 🤯🤣 #golf #golftiktok #golftok #golfer #golfswing #golfing #golflife #golftips #golfcourse #golfclub #golfgirl #golfdrills #playaholewithme #golfpro


Perhaps worst of all, this kind of behavior is pretty common, especially for female athletes. A fellow female golfer even commented, “So glad you posted this because it is my BIGGEST frustration when I’m at the driving range. Unfortunately, men always feel the need to comment on my swing or want to coach me. Guys take note: Please don’t.”

On the bright side: as annoying as it is that Ball had to endure that (not to mention what it says about the very real b.s. that women in general have to put up with on the regular), she laughed it off and just went on about her life being awesome at what she does. Just like the other smart, capable women of the world. It’s almost like…maybe women don’t need advice, so much as they need

Ball isn't holding onto any grudges over the incident

"I have a lot of interaction with males and females every single day [on the course]. And I'd say it's mostly always positive," she says. "I'm just glad I can look back at it now and laugh about it because the majority of people and golfers are all just out to help each other."

Even though her time on the golf tee with the mansplainer was uncomfortable, the reaction to her discomfort has been positive. "The reaction has been so positive," she told the BBC. "All the support, the comments, the messages, it's just been so good. And I'm just so grateful for everything that's come through."

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.


maikon alves, maykon alves, agt, dance, robot dance, dance tutorials, tiktok dance, agt dance
Maikon Alves | Instagram

Maikon Alves has people shook over is robotic style dancing.

"The Robot" is a classic dance move that's been seen on dance floors since the early 1900s, according to Vox. The mechanical move was also mastered and brought to the mainstream by dance legend Michael Jackson.

And a dancer from Brazil has put his own modern (and humorous) twist on the dance technique. Maikon Alves has been turning heads on social media with moves so fluid and robotic that people around question if he's human.


Alves got a big break after a dance to to "Boom Boom Pow" by the Black Eyed Peas went viral back in 2024—to say his moves are impressive would be an understatement. Alves popped his chest to the beat while slowly stepping in place making it look like he was gliding from move to move. Some movements were crisp and sharp like a robot while others were so fluid it was nearly unbelievable that it could be coming from a human.

Viewers respond to Maikon's moves

Comments on the video ranged between being in awe of his abilities to questioning if he was truly part robot.

"Loved. I like how everything is in sync - from the music to the moves to face expressions. 👏👏👏 and your cool personal style," one person writes.

"Doesn’t even look real it’s that good..!! Love this," someone says.

"You will be the dance instructor for the children of our AI overlords someday," a commenter thinks.

"Nah, this is God-level pop-locking," someone compliments.

"You are a legend!" Nicole Scherzinger, actress, singer and former member of the pop group and dance ensemble, Pussycat Dolls, wrote.

@maykonreplay

Minha apresentacao no AGT para vocês com as musicas originais… heheh. 🤖❤️ #agt #robot #talent

Alves' uncanny robot dance even made its way to Season 19 of America's Got Talent in 2024. His audition routine included pretending to play the violin and a fun moonwalk to robotic themed music.

During a June 2024 interview with Chupim Metropolitana, he shared about his experience on the show. "It was a dream come true because since I was a child I watched videos of the dancers I used as inspiration from there," he said. "It was magical."

Where is Maikon Alves now?

Since then, Alves has continued to display his unique robot dances on social media. Another robot dance he posted in July 2025 garnered over 60 million views on TikTok (@maykonreplay), where he has grown a strong following of fans in awe of his moves.

@maykonreplay

Hahahahahahaha

"I know it's talent but it low-key scares me," one viewer commented. And another added, "this gives me uncanny valley vibes. like great job, but I'm uncomfortable 😅."

How did Maikon Alves start dancing?

Alves shared more about how he got into dancing during his interview with Chupim Metropolitana.

"Since I was a kid I watched Michael Jackson videos in the living room. My mom would put them on," he said. "I watched the Michael Jackson videos and I took them as a reference. As I grew up, I saw other dancers too, like Chris Brown and Usher. And then I mixed everything, adding humor too. And I just kept growing."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Alves also explained that his style of robotic dancing has taken lots of "dedication", and it started by learning Michael Jackson's classic Moonwalk dance.

"I was very shy, so dancing with humor helped me a lot," he shared. "I watched his videos and practiced a lot. In the beginning it was very difficult. I did a lot of mime."

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.