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Amanda Bynes and her very public conservatorship fight shows the need to rethink mental health

Amanda Bynes and her very public conservatorship fight shows the need to rethink mental health
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Amanda Bynes.

In a now deleted post, actress Amanda Bynes returned to social media to speak out about the petition to terminate her conservatorship, which was put into place in 2013 after several public incidents.

Her mother Lynn was named as the temporary conservator of Bynes' personal life and finances before being appointed permanently. Bynes had been arrested several times for misdemeanor offenses and her struggles with substance use. At the time the conservatorship was petitioned, Bynes was involuntarily hospitalized after lighting a fire in her neighbor's driveway in July 2013. Bynes confirmed in a 2014 tweet that she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder after her hospitalization.

Since being placed under a conservatorship, Bynes has stayed mostly out of the public eye. She enrolled in the Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising in 2014 following her release from the hospital and subsequent conservatorship. She graduated in 2019 while on a day pass from her inpatient treatment facility at the time. Bynes has reportedly continued to do well since graduating and opened up about her past substance abuse in an interview after graduation.

Bynes' parents are reported to be in agreement that her conservatorship should end, though a judge had ordered the arrangement to be extended until 2023. If that sounds familiar, it's because we've all learned a lot more about celebrity conservatorships after the much popularized end to Britney Spears' conservatorship last year. The length of these conservatorships raises some questions, including at what point do we question the law on how these conservatorships are carried out, and to what length of time.

In both these cases, the legal reach of the conservatorship has been extensive. They lasted years and left the women with little say in controlling their lives. While it seems that Amanda’s parents truly had her best interests at heart and are now fully on board to have her conservatorship terminated, it begs the question as to where the line is drawn when it comes to mental health conservatorships and how extensive or limited they should be. It is not unheard of for someone to be placed under a guardianship for life, especially if the person is intellectually or developmentally delayed and they cannot make appropriate decisions for themselves without extensive help. But in cases where mental health is concerned, it feels different.

In most cases, full autonomy is ideal for people who suffer with mental health conditions, even severe ones like schizophrenia, bipolar disorder or other disorders that can include psychosis. Having a severe mental health condition does not make someone permanently incapable of caring for themselves or others, particularly if they're able to commit to a regimen of doctor recommended medication and therapy.

Conservatorship is something that is typically used as a last resort for people experiencing severe mental illness. It is oftentimes short-lived until the person is stabilized and set up with some sort of intensive mental health therapy, but it can be difficult to be released from a conservatorship if the person doesn’t have a strong network of support. When conservatorships stretch out to decades, it makes you wonder whether the support being received is adequate, whether the mental health system is failing that person in some way, whether there needs to be a holistic re-evaluation of the law surrounding conservatorships. It also shines a light on the importance of commitment to ongoing treatment and the associated results.

Amanda Bynes feeling well enough to advocate for the termination of her conservatorship is something to celebrate. Mental illness does not have to hold the level of stigma that it does, and people who are experiencing conditions severe enough to result in hospitalization or guardianship still deserve autonomy over their lives and people rooting for their success.

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Gen X has been designated the 'worst grandparents.' Sadly, their explanation makes sense.

The latch-key generation doesn't hate their family, they're burnt out.

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Gen X designated the 'worst grandparents' by Millennials

Generation X, typically the children of Baby Boomers born between the years of 1965-1980 tend to have a complicated reputation depending on who you ask. Some view them as a feral generation never to be spoken of poorly without consequence, while others view them as innovators pushing us into the future. But in recent years, Gen Xers have been dubbed the "worst grandparents" by social media users.

This multi-year conversation started when a video went viral calling Gen X out for being "terrible" grandparents, claiming that they never want to help with grandchildren. It didn't take long before other Millennials piled on to air their own grievances about Gen X grandparents. Most people criticizing the "new grandparents" were genuinely perplexed as to how they did not want to be more involved in the lives of their grandchildren.

Gen X; Gen X grandparents; absent grandparents; Gen X worst grandparents; Millennials; worst grandparents; Gen ZFamily baking fun in the kitchen.Photo credit: Canva

Kylie Muse reveals in a video that she felt neglected by her Gen X parents growing up, saying, "It's quite a common theme for Gen X parents to be neglectful in some capacity and it's just crazy to me how more of them haven't learned from the past 20 to 30 years, instead of these grandparents seeing their kids having kids as an opportunity to restore the health in their relationships with their kids by showing up and helping them during the hardest transition of their lives, they would rather double down and compromise their relationship with that next generation. All for the sake of hyper-individualism and pride."

@kylies.muse Gen x grandparents and their beloved empty nest 🥴 just say you hate having a family 😭 #grandparents #grandparentsoftiktok ♬ original sound - Kylie ꩜

The critique coming from the younger generation is not lost on Gen X, and they started coming out in force to respond with such vigor you'd think John Hughes had just announced the re-release of The Breakfast Club. It would seem that some of the people complaining of the lack of involvement have not considered that Gen X could have valid reasons for not immediately jumping in to take on grandparenting in the way some expect. A man by the name of John S. Blake gives a candid look into why Gen X was neglected as children and, in turn, became hype-independent at an early age.

"As a Gen X who's been on this earth long enough to have some hindsight I can tell you this, being independent at a young age is not a flex, what it actually means is capitalism is so brutal that our parents were forced to neglect their own children to stay alive. My generation was struggling so much that we had to leave our children unattended in order to produce enough so that we could afford to exist," Blake says.

@blackfluidpoet Replying to @ellens0061 #foryoupage #homealone #fyp #foryou ♬ Slippin' - Re-Recorded - DMX

But perhaps one of the most heart wrenching explanations comes from an elder Millennial who goes by the name Amazing Dea. In response to another Millennial who asks about Gen X being let off the hook, Dea shares, "Being as though you look like you might be a younger Millennial, let me go ahead and enlighten you. Generation X and older Millennials had to live through more than just this pandemic. We had the crack epidemic, we had the AIDS epidemic and let me tell you something, it was scary as f***."

Dea went on to explain that there were apartment complexes burned due to high populations of people with AIDS living in them and how they would witness people go from being completely normal to being addicted to crack in a matter of weeks. It seems that depending on socioeconomic status, Gen Xers lived wildly different lives with the common theme being growing up entirely too fast at an extremely young age.

Gen X; Gen X grandparents; absent grandparents; Gen X worst grandparents; Millennials; worst grandparents; Gen ZThree generations smiling by the sea.Photo credit: Canva

Another person kindly breaks down the confusion over why Gen X isn't rising to the occasion of being award-winning grandparents. In response to the criticism she replies, "We grew up in a different time, first of all. A lot of us, meaning me, Gen X, I was raised by boomers. A lot of us did not get raised by our grandparents. We were like the feral kids, like by 7 and 9 years old we were actually babysitting our brothers and sisters, alright."

The woman explains further in the video that Gen X doesn't want to raise their grandchildren or simply be babysitters, that there's a difference between expecting grandparents to be involved and expecting them to be babysitters.

@that1crazy72 Let’s take it a step further. You share DNA with your grandkids they are part of you not everyone gets the privilege of being a grandparent so if you are one take that as a blessing #genxgrandparents ♬ original sound - That1crazy72

In many of the response videos shared by Gen Xers, they certainly seem to love their grandchildren and children alike, but there's a discrepancy in expectation. The consensus of the forgotten generation seems to be that they had adult responsibilities much too early, were exposed to adult life experiences at a young age, and were often left to their own devices for long periods of time while also being told that their voices didn't matter.

While the argument seems to be around their lack of involvement as grandparents, they appear to be saying that they want to enjoy the freedom they didn't have as children, while being valued as a person and not a babysitter. In many follow up videos, Gen Xers gushed over their grandchildren and how they loved when they were around. It's just that they draw the line at raising them. Maybe for some, their experiences with their own childhood isn't enough to move Gen X out of the "worst grandparents" category, but for others it provides much needed context.

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UPS driver's tongue-in-cheek 'homeowner advice' is actually super important

So many homeowners need to hear this.

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Several emergency responders chimed in to agree.

A UPS worker might have been joking when he offered his “best advice ever” for homeowners, but it’s actually something that should be taken seriously.

In a clip posted to his TikTok, the Arkansas-based driver (presumably named Austin), says:

“Listen carefully because it’s going to be the best decision you make when going about this. Whenever you paint your house, whenever you build your house, and you go to buy numbers at Lowe’s or Walmart, or wherever you go to get your numbers, one trick you need to know—you get any color besides the one that your house is.”

@austin_ups Best kept secret #homeowners #homes #ups #secrets #hacks #goodvibes #energy #fyp ♬ Spirit In The Sky - Deluxe Edition - Norman Greenbaum

Sure, having hard to read or even completely absent home numbers presents not only a frustrating problem for those who make deliveries, but it can also be detrimental in times of emergencies.

And if you don’t want to take Austin’s word for it, you can trust the several health care professionals and fellow drivers that agreed.

“Can’t believe the number of houses without a number on it AT ALL. Not on the curb, not on the house, not on the mailbox.”

“Delivery driver here. Make sure the numbers are larger than one inch on your mailbox. Especially if you live on a busy street and the speed limit is above 35mph. We can’t see those tiny numbers. Just sayin’.”

“Listen, as a home health nurse, make sure SOMETHING even has numbers we can see.”

“Our numbers are 9” tall. My husband is a paramedic. Ikyky.”

“As a first responder please make your house number visible for emergency services!!!”

“UPS, FedEx, Domino's and other delivery companies should all get together and make a serious but funny commercial about this very real issue.

Back in 2021, an Amazon worker made a similar PSA, warning a home she had delivered to that “my dude…it’s unsafe, honestly,” to not have visible numbers.

@_jesshuseman We just moved in and this happened today…she’s not wrong though. Guess I need to get some house numbers. #amazondelivery ♬ original sound - _jesshuseman

Generally speaking, high contrast levels (black numbers against a white painted house, for example) work best, as well as having the numbers high enough to see and be visible on the curb.

But Brick & Batten, an exterior design company, has a few other really helpful tips:

The further the house, the larger the numbers

Brick & Batten recommends 3” or larger for houses 0-69 feet away from the street, 4” or larger for houses 70-110 feet, 5” or larger for houses 111-132 feet, 6” or larger for houses 133-160 feet, 8” or larger for houses 161-300 feet, and 8” or larger for houses 301-385 feet, respectively.

Choose long-lasting material

Opt for powder-coated numbers, and pleeeeeeaase replace the old, tired, rusty ones already falling off.

Place numbers somewhere eye level or higher

And in a location free from obstructions like overgrown foliage or seasonal decorations.

Make it visible at night

Place them near a light source, or install one.

Jazz things up with a plaque

Just because they need to stand out, doesn’t mean it has to go against your house design. With a little attention to aesthetics, it can even become a bit of an accent piece.

Making sure house numbers are visible is probably not on the top of anyone’s mind, but it’s little details like this that can really come back to bite us one way or another. So let’s make our lives—and the lives of our delivery drivers—better by following these simple tips.

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Heartbroken weatherman stops mid-report to explain on live TV why he 'can't' forecast anymore

"We may be flying blind" from now on.

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John Morales stopped his report to educate viewers on what budget cuts really mean.

I hardly ever watch the news on television, especially not for the weather. It's just so much easier to pick up my phone and check Google or The Weather Channel. I just want to know how warm it's going to be or how likely it is to rain. These days, I can find that out in about 10 seconds and go about my day.

But when there's potential danger—hurricanes, storms that might knock out the power of topple over trees, tornado warnings, or threats of ice and snow—my trusty local meteorologist or weatherman is always there. All of that said, I've never once considered that I might not be able to get my weather forecast from either source, at least not accurately. It's 2025—our weather modeling should be better than ever, state of the art, right?

John Morales, a meteorologist and hurricane specialist with NBC6 in South Florida, was reporting on an upcoming storm when he suddenly shifted gears, right in the middle of the broadcast.

weatherman, weather, meteorologist, news, tv news, news anchor, viral videos, trump, doge, governmentWithout good data, we can't accurately predict the paths of hurricanes. Photo by NASA on Unsplash

Morales explains that in his 34 years of presenting the weather, he's always been able to confidently tell his viewers when a hurricane might hit, or when it might turn away. He's always been able to stand behind his data, modeling, and forecast in order to help protect the people of South Florida.

"I am here to tell you that I am not sure I can do that this year."

Why? "Because of the cuts, the gutting, the sledgehammer attack on science in general."

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Morales then pulled up a graphic instead of his usual weather map. It laid out some stark realities about severe understaffing of the National Weather Service, and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. Between brutal layoffs, employees accepting the recent DOGE buyout, and straight-up resignations, the agencies responsible for collecting weather data have lost hundreds and hundreds of valuable experts.

He also explained that due to federal government budget cuts, there's been a sizeable decrease in weather balloon launches across the country. Weather balloons are instruments that take crucial measurements of the upper atmosphere and send data that helps with forecasting. With less data available, and lower quality data, Morales say that "the quality of forecasts is becoming degraded."

That's a pretty scary thought, especially in a place like South Florida. What do you do when your local meteorologist can't predict what a powerful hurricane will do next?

"This is a multi-generational impact on science in this country," Morales warns.

Watch his passionate plea here:

Almost nine million people viewed the powerful clip on X. It was reshared over 26,000 times. Morales' message is definitely getting the attention it deserves.

It's not just the National Weather Service that's bleeding. In the name of efficiency, The White House has slashed budgets at the CDC, the National Institutes of Health, and more. Trimming the federal budget sounds well and good until you realize that we won't be making any major cancer breakthroughs any time soon without funding the research. And we won't be able to protect people from hurricanes and tornadoes without complete weather data.

(And yes, even the Weather app on your iPhone needs a database to pull from.)

Meanwhile, we're spending $1 trillion—yes, trillion— per year on our military. This is the anti-science, anti-expert sentiment Morales is talking about. It's been building for years and is just now coming to a head in the worst way.

We still need meteorologists and weather experts like Morales. We still need scientists.

weatherman, weather, meteorologist, news, tv news, news anchor, viral videos, trump, doge, governmentWe still need human scientists and experts that can compile and read maps like this one. Photo by Brian McGowan on Unsplash

ChatGPT can pull weather data from Google and tell you if there's going to be a thunderstorm, but can it tell you when the data behind that forecast is incomplete or unreliable? That's the reality we're facing right now, and we might not know the forecast isn't reliable until it's too late in some cases.

TV weathermen who live in our communities and can put crucial context behind the weather and help keep us safe still matter. Not only that, but they are ambassadors for science, and they still have a big platform in many communities around the country. Morales is making sure he makes the most of his.

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Motivation expert's two-word theory frees you from taking it personally when others let you down

You don't need to take responsibility for everyone.

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Mel Robbins giving a TEDx speech.

One of the most disappointing aspects of life is that, at some point, everyone close to you will eventually let you down or fall short of your expectations. Some have slip-ups and fall short of what you'd expect, and some consistently let you down your entire life.

It can be deflating when people don’t show up when you need them, especially if you have been there for them. When you need people and they don’t show up, it feels like you’re carrying a burden that you can never get off your back. That’s why Mel Robbins’ two-word “Let them” theory is so powerful. It liberates you from constantly feeling controlled by those who let you down.

What is the ‘Let them’ theory?

Mel Robbins is a podcast host, author, motivational speaker, former lawyer, and author of The Let Them Theory. In the TikTok video below, she explains how allowing people to be themselves gives you the power to improve the things you can control, instead of suffering in the same cycle of expectations and disappointments.

@melrobbins

People can only meet you as far as they've met themselves... and a lot of them haven't done the work. Listen to The Let Them Theory, narrated by yours truly, only on @audible 💚 #melrobbins #letthem #letthemtheory People can only meet you as far as they've met themselves... and a lot of them haven't done the work. Listen to The Let Them Theory, narrated by yours truly, only on @Audible 💚 #melrobbins #letthem #letthemtheory

The “Let them” practice begins by acknowledging that others are imperfect and we cannot change them. “People can only meet you as deeply as they've met themselves. Most people haven't gone to therapy, they haven't looked at their issues, and frankly, they don't want to. Let them. Let your parents be less than what you deserved," she opens the video. "Let your family life be something that isn't a fairy tale. Try to remind yourself that they're just doing the best they can with the resources and the life experiences they have."

mel robbins, motivation expert, mel robbins podcast, let them theory, microphoneMotivation expert Mel Robbins.Photo © Cody OLoughlin (PR Photo)

While it can be hard to admit that some of the most important people in your life will never turn things around to your satisfaction, accepting that reality is the most empowering thing you can do for yourself. “But here's the important part,” Robbins continues. “Now that you know the 'Let them' theory, you get to choose what happens moving forward, because you're gonna focus on what you can control, which is what you say, what you do, what you value, and what energy you bring to the relationship.”

Put simply: Now that you allow them to be who they are, you can act accordingly. You can stop carrying the weight of unmet expectations.

What is the locus of control?

Robbins’ theory is a simple way of understanding the locus of control psychological concept. The locus of control is the extent to which we believe we have control over our own lives. When our actions, thoughts, and feelings are contingent on events (and people) outside of our control, we have an external locus of control. The healthy thing is to revert that to an internal locus of control, where we believe we control the outcomes of our actions. Those with an internal locus of control tend to be less influenced by others, work hard to get what they want, and report being happier, and more independent.

mel robbins, motivation expert, mel robbins podcast, let them theory, psychologyMotivation expert Mel Robbins.Photo via © Tony Luong (PR Photo)

“The only person you can change is you,” Robbins says at the end of her video. "When you say ‘Let them,’ you see your family exactly as they are, perhaps for the very first time in your life. They're human. You have no control over what's happened. You have no control over who they are. You can only control what you do from this point forward. Accepting the reality of your situation doesn't mean you're surrendering to it. Instead, it's about reclaiming your power to shape your future.”

Now that you’ve taken control of your future, what are you going to do with it?

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Parenting

Teachers share the tell-tale signs they know a parent truly cares about their kid

"When the child speaks, the adult listens. When the adult speaks, the child listens."

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Teachers share insights on the signs parents truly care about their kids.

Few people spend more time with kids than teachers. From the classroom to the playground, teachers have deep and intuitive insight into what their students' relationships are like with their parents, and many teachers can tell when parents are invested and truly care about their kids.

In a Reddit forum, member @allsfairinwar posed the question: "Teachers of Reddit: What are some small, subtle ways you can tell a child’s parent really cares about them?"

Teachers from all education levels shared their insight. From elementary teachers to high school teachers, these educators offered their firsthand experience with students that informed them about their relationship with parents at home. These are their most powerful observations.

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"When the parent stops and actually looks at their kid's art/work/listens about their day before heading home. I know everyone gets busy but damn don't shove the art your kid is proud of right in their bag without first looking at it. We do the same piece of art for a week. They spent 2 hours on that, spare 2 minutes to show them their effort is worth something to you." —@Worldly_Might_3183

"When the child speaks, the adult listens. When the adult speaks, the child listens." —@homerbartbob

"When the parents are familiar with the child’s friends and talk to their child’s friends, I know they’re listening to their child talk about their day at school. Or when parents let slip that they got a full recap of something I said or that happened at school. I know they are having conversations with their child at home, and paying attention." —@Pinkrivrdolphn

minecraft, minecreaft gif, minecraft meme, minecraft kids, minecraft movieGames GIFGiphy

"When the kid is happy/quick to tell their parents about things. Not just serious or important things, but just random bullsh*t. Do I care about Minecraft? Not really. Do I care that my kid cares about Minecraft? Very much. Lay it on me kid. Spare no detail." —@IJourden

"They let their kids fail and experience natural consequences. Good parents are preparing their children to be adults, and part of that is learning responsibility and accountability. Let your kids make mistakes and learn from them!" —@oboe_you_didnt

"You can tell a lot about home life based on students behavior the week leading up to a break. If they are happy/excited/giddy/endearingly obnoxious I know they are going somewhere safe to someone who cares. The students who don’t have that are often increasingly anxious/angry/withdrawn/acting out." —@pulchritudinousprout

hug, greeting, hugs, greet, reunitedMonsters Inc Hug GIFGiphy

"The moment that a parent greets the child at the end of the day is very telling. Some parents clearly want to know all about their child's day and connect with them, some don't." —@Smug010

"When I make positive contact home and the parent speaks glowingly about their own kid. It’s great to hear." —@outtodryclt

"A few years back, I heard a parent ask their kid if they found someone to be kind to today. That made a real impact on me. Now I try to remind my own kids to 'find someone to be kind to' if I’m doing drop off and/or ask 'Who were you kind to today?' after school." —@AspiringFicWriter

"When a student asks for help, they actually need the help. They are not doing it just to get your attention."—@Typical_Importance65

cute kid, well groomed, kid hair, clean clothes, kid cared forDance Marathon Reaction GIF by Children's Miracle Network HospitalsGiphy

"It doesn’t always mean everything is perfect at home, but a child who is well-groomed is always a good sign. That doesn’t always mean the most fashionable clothes or perfect hair, just that the child is clean, their clothes are clean and appropriate for the weather. Also when a child knows how to celebrate their own wins and isn’t afraid of making a mistake or being wrong- that shows that their parents have modeled good emotional regulation." —@itscornelectric

"They get them services when they’re struggling. I work with kids with disabilities and the learning outcomes/experience of school (and by extension, the greater world) for kids who have their needs met is far different to those who don’t. The number of parents who respond to a teacher saying 'I think it might be worth John seeing an OT/a speech therapist/ getting his eyes checked' with something along the lines of 'f*ck you, what would you know?' Is astounding. The parents who make appointments, share information from specialists with the school, and are proactive about their children’s abilities or disabilities - their kids see such improvements." —@prison_industrial_co

"They ask thoughtful questions. Even something that seems routine to adults like, 'How is/was your day?' I'm in elementary, and it's appropriate for kids to talk mostly about themselves. Kids who ask thoughtful questions are doing so because it's consistently modeled. It's also not very common (again, age appropriate egocentrism) so it stands out." —@mundane-mondays

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"When you know they're being exposed to reading at home. Maybe they can read at a higher level or they're mastering their sight words. For students with learning disabilities, the kids are trying their hardest to read, using context clues, using pictures and making up a story, or even making different voices for characters. When I was in a low functioning Autistic support room, this one little boy couldn't form words, but he made noises is different voices and used dramatic face expressions on each page to represent characters talking." —@Mediocre-Bee-9262

"Accountability. A good parent knows that their kids isn't perfect and if the kid does something wrong (like hitting or bullying other kids) they don't look for excuses, or for how the other kid provoked that behavior, but helps their kid understand why their behavior was hurtful." —@SadlyNotDannyDeVito

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