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Adam Scott and Tramell Tillman in Severance
While remote work has been a mainstay since the peak of the COVID-19 pandemic, more and more companies are attempting to mandate that employees return to the office, on a full or part-time basis, including one now-infamous effort from JPMorgan Chase. The company announced that as of March 2025, all employees were required to return to the office five days per week. Their CEO even ditched the policy that allowed employees to work-from-home two days per week.
To mark the occasion, welcome everyone back ( and perhaps twist the knife a bit deeper?) the United State's largest bank unveiled a plan for a massive $3 billion, 2.5 millions square foot tower on New York's famous Park Avenue—which would house 14,000 workers and feature state of the art architecture and technology—in addition to loading up its new corporate headquarters with perks to help employees transition back to office life.
Some of these "perks" were truly great and truly enticing. Others were... questionable, to say the least.
Grace Tallon on LinkedIn even noticed that some of the benefits of working in the JPMorgan Office seemed like they were yanked right out of one of the most popular current TV shows on the planet: Severance.
If you don't know it, Severance is a psychological thriller on Apple TV that doubles as a dark and biting satire of corporate office culture and capitalism. Employees at a mysterious company called Lumon are "severed" — meaning their brains, memories, and personalities are literally split in half. While at work, they are a different person and retain no memories when they leave the office every night. In return for their sacrifice and for hitting key milestones, the employees receive ludicrous rewards like short dance parties with their boss, melon parties with carved watermelons, and handfuls of balloons. Employees are also expected to marvel at bizarre pieces of art that line the hall, featuring stoic images of Lumon's revered (and more than a bit creepy) founders.
Conversely, JPMorgan's new tower boasted 19-restaurants with at-your-desk delivery, an Irish pub, and on-site physical therapy and yoga. But that's not all!
Tallon notes, however, that JPMorgan also tried to entice employees with things like "personalized climate" in rooms and offices, a "signature scent" that wafts through the halls and somehow reinforced the brand, and, get this, even a "corporate art collection" that celebrates the company's history and values. Be more on the nose next time, will you JPMorgan? That's to say nothing of design elements that support worker's circadian rhythms and coffee machines that learn your favorites over time.
"Let’s stop pretending this is about connecting and doing better work," she writes.
Read Tallon's full post below on the striking similarities:
While some folks defended the corporation for doing their best to make employees feel cared for and taken care of, others didn't quite see it that way, especially when they compared it to the perks of WFH life.
"The climate in my own home office is just right. Along with my own coffee, artwork, lighting (window wide open), and other perks and it cost me zero dollars to drive there and I don't have to wear shoes! Way out of touch," wrote Alix Z.
"Those perks sound more like a high-tech museum experience than actual employee benefits. Instead of a 'signature scent,' how about giving employees real reasons to feel good about coming to work?" said Diana Alayon.
Some at-home perk simply can't be beat. Photo credit: Canva
"Working at home perks: My own candle collection, curated to suit my preferences, Coffee and tea on tap, from our favourite brands, Comfortable cushions and blankets to help regulate my temperature at my desk, A variety of lighting options, ranging from warm white lamps to 'the big light', Freedom to work anywhere I want, such as my office desk, sofa, kitchen table or a coffee shop near by, Personalised art with photos of family and pictures we enjoy, Working space decorated to my own specifications, Plenty of spaces nearby for fresh air and dog walks" wrote Eloise Todd in a mic-drop comment.
There are of course benefits to working together in-person with your colleagues. And sure, if you're required to be there, nothing offsets discomfort quite like delicious lunches and free yoga classes. But to take away even the option of occasionally working from home and duct-taping over it with an algorithm that tracks coffee orders and temperature preferences, and filling the halls with strange paintings that move when employees walk by? It kind of loses the thread, and it's exactly the kind of thinking that the creators of Severance are so good at skewering.
Mark (Adam Scott) at the infamous dance party scene in Severance. media0.giphy.com
According to Forbes, there are 6 distinct reason companies might push for a return to the office. One, corporate heads believe employees get more "immersed in the company’s values." Two, they think it's easier to monitor whether or not an employee is actually working. Three, to justify the cot of that expensive office space. Four, to foster "spontaneous collaboration." Five, to give new employees a chance to observe and interact with more seasoned worker. and six, to restore a sense of belonging within the company.
But of course, none of these things have anything to do with what people really want: Autonomy. That, in addition to fair pay, some level of flexibility, and good benefits. Perks are nice — even the kind of weird ones — but they can only go so far. It remains to be seen if companies that dictate back-to-the-office edicts are willing to follow through on the things that really matter. Please note how waffle parties did not make that list.
This article originally appeared in February
Man's through-the-wall piano duet with a mystery neighbor became a beautiful love story.
Sometimes the right two people come along at the right time in each other's lives, and a story for the ages is born. But it's rare that we get to see such stories captured in real-time. This time we're lucky. In a silent saga befitting a Pixar short film—complete with soundtrack—a man and his mystery neighbor have taken us all on a beautiful journey of music, love, longing, and loss.
Giorgio Lo Porto is an Italian living in London, and during the COVID-19 pandemic, he shared a video of his new neighbor playing piano. The music is muffled behind their shared wall, but clear enough to hear. Lo Porto wrote that he left a note for the mystery neighbor, telling them he loved their music and asking if they could play "My Heart Will Go On." And so they did.
"My Heart WIll Go On" by Celine Dion Giphy
Lo Porto left another note suggesting that they play something together, each in their own apartments. A call-and-response duet of sorts. He didn't know if they'd do it, or if they'd forget when the time came. He also said he himself hadn't played in months. But he started playing at 2pm, and as soon as he stopped, the neighbor began.
Their duets became a weekend "meet up," playing back and forth through their shared wall.
You can watch a compilation of the performance below but keep reading because there is so much more to this beautiful story:
- YouTube youtu.be
Seems like a perfect meet-cute in a romantic comedy, doesn't it?
On Valentine's Day, they played a duet and Lo Porto wrote "It's Valentine's Day. We're in lockdown. This was our way of saying, I don't know who you are but I'm here. You're not alone."
Then it came time for them to meet.
"Well, today I have met my neighbor," Lo Porto wrote in a video shared a week later. "It was better than expected."
"His name is Emil..."
A mystery neighbor started playing along on the piano and a beautiful friendship formed.Photo credit: Canva
"He is 78 years old, originally from Poland. This is his temporary accommodation while he waits for his house to be sold."
"He lost his wife in December due to COVID," Lo Porto shared. "And all he has left is the piano. And the reason why he plays at 2pm every weekend is because his wife loved it."
"He thanked me for keeping him motivated and less lonely. And I promised that I'll play with him until he moves out."
"He is camera shy," he added. "But I'll try again when he's ready."
Lo Porto shared that Emil is "a special soul" and that "he is fine now, healing." And his piano playing is just gorgeous.
Playing with Emil inspired Lo Porto to write his own song. "I woke up with 3 notes in my head," he wrote on February 27.
He added some string orchestration to it and called it "Dear Emil." It's the first song he's ever written.
- YouTube www.youtube.com
"When I wrote this piece I started picturing Emil's life," he wrote. "A 78 y.o. widower who lost his wife due to this stupid virus. Spending days at home alone due to lockdown. Looking forward to play her favourite piano songs at 2pm every weekend, until a note appeared on his door. A letter showing he was heard and not alone. And a new friendship started. Two pianos between a wall, not knowing who was playing. But it didn't matter."
"You can be the light of somebody else's darkness. So keep shining." Another week later, Lo Porto announced that Emil was moving out the following week, and shared their last weekend duet—the much requested "Moonlight Sonata."
He said Emil still didn't want to be on camera, but said he was much happier and thanked everyone who had been watching their duets. Lo Porto promised he would keep playing for him on the weekends.
Two men bonded over their love of piano. Giphy
It would be lovely if the story ended there, but it doesn't. (May need a tissue now if you haven't already grabbed one.)
Lo Porto shared on March 14th that he'd received word that Emil had passed away in his sleep: "And now he is reunited with his wife."
"Dear Emil," he wrote. "I knew very little about you, but you changed my life. You gave me back my passion, and we shared that with the world. You'll be in my heart. I'll keep playing, thinking of how powerful music can be. You said I was your light, but you've been mine too. Bye, Emil."
- YouTube www.youtube.com
If you needed a good cry today, hope that helped. And if you needed a reminder that humans can be wonderful and life can connect us in beautiful and mysterious ways, now you've got one.
You can follow Lo Porto on YouTube and listen to his music on Spotify as well.
This article originally appeared four years ago.
A woman in a hot car.
Cars can become unbearably hot in the summer. Even at a seemingly mild 80 degrees outside, the temperature inside can soar to a scorching 109°F within 20 minutes. According to the CDC, in just 40 minutes it can escalate to a blistering 118°F. After an hour, it can peak at a searing 123°F. And that’s just the air temperature; a dark dashboard or seat can reach a staggering 200°F.
"These objects (e.g., dashboard, steering wheel, child seat) heat the adjacent air by conduction and convection and also give off longwave radiation (red) which is very efficient at warming the air trapped inside a vehicle," the CDC explained in their report. It can take five to 10 minutes for your car to cool down on a hot day by turning on the air conditioning, which probably means you burn your buttocks and thighs on the hot seat. That’s why Hannah Fry shared an amazing hack on TikTok, demonstrating how to cool your car down in seconds using the laws of thermodynamics.
Fry is Professor of the Public Understanding of Mathematics at the University of Cambridge. She is a mathematician, a best-selling author, an award-winning science host, and the host of numerous popular podcasts and television shows.
@fryrsquared That age-old dilemma of choosing between having a non-sweltering car or baffling a passerby because you look like a fool who doesn't know how to use a door
Fry suggests that instead of turning on the air conditioning, which she claims is “not worth it” because of the time it takes, open one of the windows on the opposite side of the door. Then, rapidly open and close the driver’s side door, so it moves back and forth like a fan.
“The reason why it works is that when you open and close the door, especially if you do it quickly, the door, as it's moving outwards, it sweeps out all of the air that's in its way, creating this sort of area of low pressure that you get here,” Fry said. “And then that sets up something called bulk flow, which is where all of the hot, sweaty, horrible air inside the car is drawn outwards.”
A man sweating in his car.via Canva/Photos
Fry’s super practical approach to a problem everyone deals with blew many people’s minds in the comments. “If I ever catch someone in real life doing this, I’m gonna know they’ve watched this exact video,” a commenter wrote. “I will give it a go, but while opening and closing the door, scream, ‘Be gone, heat demons! BE GONE!’” another added. “Going to remember this the next time my partner farts in the car,” someone joked.
The fact that the inside air temperature in a car and the outside temperature are often drastically different, especially in the summer, serves as a crucial reminder to dog owners everywhere to never leave their pet unattended in a parked car. "Most dog owners know that you can’t leave a pet in a hot car," the American Kennel Club writes. "Temperatures can rise to dangerous levels in just minutes, putting your dog at risk of heatstroke. But what if you open a window a little bit? Does that make it safe to leave your dog in the car? The answer is simple. You should never leave a dog alone in the car, even with the windows cracked. In some states, it’s even illegal."
The following video by The Dodo explains why leaving a dog in a hot car can be deadly, even when it doesn’t feel that hot outside.
- YouTube www.youtube.com
Students working; an empty classroom.
When talking with other parents I know, it's hard not to sound like a grumpy old man when we get around to discussing school schedules: "Am I the only one who feels like kids have so many days off? I never got that many days off when I was a kid! And I had to go work in the coal mine after, too!" I know what I sound like, but I just can't help it.
In Georgia where I live, we have a shorter summer break than some other parts of the country. But my kids have the entire week of Thanksgiving off, a week in September, two whole weeks at Christmas, a whole week off in February, and a weeklong spring break. They have asynchronous days (during which they complete assignments at home, which usually takes about 30 minutes) about once a month, and they have two or three half-day weeks throughout the year. Quite honestly, it feels like they're never in school for very long before they get another break, which makes it tough to get in a rhythm with work and career goals. Plus, we're constantly arranging day camps and other childcare options for all the time off. After a quick search, I can confirm I'm not losing my mind: American kids have fewer school days than most other major countries.
Schools Out Fun GIF by Pen Pals Giphy
So, it caught my attention in a major way when I read that Whitney Independent School District in Texas recently decided to enact a four-day week heading into the 2025 school year. That makes it one of dozens of school districts in Texas to make the change and over 900 nationally.
The thought of having the kids home from school EVERY Friday or Monday makes me want to break out in stress hives, but this four-day school week movement isn't designed to give parents a headache. It's meant to lure teachers back to work.
Yes, teachers are leaving the profession in droves and young graduates don't seem eager to replace them. Why? For starters, the pay is bad—but that's just the beginning. Teachers are burnt out, undermined and criticized relentlessly, held hostage by standardized testing, and more. It can be a grueling, demoralizing, and thankless job. The love and passion they have for shaping the youth of tomorrow can only take you so far when you feel like you're constantly getting the short end of the stick.
School districts want to pay their teachers more, in theory, but their hands are often tied. So, they're getting creative to recruit the next generation of teachers into their schools—starting with an extra day off for planning, catch-up, or family time every week.
Class in session Photo by National Cancer Institute on Unsplash
So far, the data shows that the truncated schedule perk is working. In these districts, job applications for teachers are up, retirements are down, and teachers are reporting better mental well-being. That's great news!
But these positive developments may be coming at the price of the working parents in the communities. Most early adopters of the four-day week have been rural communities with a high prevalence of stay-at-home parents. As the idea starts to take hold in other parts of the country, it's getting more pushback. Discussions on Reddit, Facebook, and other social media platforms are overrun with debate on how this is all going to shake up. Some parents, to be fair, like the idea! If they stay-at-home or have a lot of flexibility, they see it as an opportunity for more family time. But many are feeling anxious. Here's what's got those parents worried:
The effect on students' achievement is still unclear.
The execution of the four-day week varies from district to district. Some schools extend the length of each of the four days, making the total instructional time the same. That makes for a really long day, and some teachers say the students are tired and more unruly by the late afternoon. Some districts are just going with less instruction time overall, which has parents concerned that their kids might fall behind.
Four-day school weeks put parents in a childcare bind.
Having two working parents is becoming more common and necessary with the high cost of living. I know, I know—"school isn't daycare!" But it is the safe, reliable, and educational place we send our kids while we we work.
Families with money and resources may be able to enroll their kids in more academics, extracurriculars, sports, or childcare, but a lot of normal families won't be able to afford that cost. Some schools running a four-day week offer a paid childcare option for the day off, but that's an added expense and for families with multiple kids in the school system, it's just not possible.
This will inevitably end with some kids getting way more screentime.
With most parents still working five-day weeks, and the cost of extra activities or childcare too high, a lot of kids are going to end up sitting around on the couch with their iPad on those days off. I'm no expert, and I'm certainly not against screentime, but adding another several hours of it to a child's week seems less than ideal.
Of course there are other options other than paid childcare and iPads. There are play dates, there's getting help from family and friends. All of these options are an enormous amount of work to arrange for parents who are already at capacity.
Season 3 Running GIF by The Simpsons Giphy
A Commissioner of Education from Missouri calls truncated schedules a "band-aid solution with diminishing returns." Having an extra planning day won't stop teachers from getting scapegoated by politicians or held to impossible curriculum standards, it won't keep them from having to buy their own supplies or deal with ever-worsening student behavior.
Some teachers and other experts have suggested having a modified five-day school week, where one of the days gets set aside as a teacher planning day while students are still on-site participating in clubs, music, art—you know, all the stuff that's been getting cut in recent years. Something like that could work in some places.
As a dad, I don't mind the idea of my busy kids having an extra day off to unwind, pursue hobbies, see friends, catch up on projects, or spend time as a family. And I'm also very much in favor of anything that takes pressure off of overworked teachers. But until we adopt a four-day work week as the standard, the four-day school week is always going to feel a little out of place.
This article originally appeared in February. It has been updated.
The old "Someone call 911!" scene in TV and movies makes stressful emergencies seem a lot easier to manage than they actually are. If you've ever been the one to make that call, you know that adrenaline comes on strong. It can give you energy and strength, but it can also make you shaky, and it can make it hard to keep a clear head while you talk to the dispatcher. You might have trouble staying calm, clearly describing the situation and your location, and following potentially life-saving instructions.
That's what makes this next story all the more incredible. A 911 call can be a scary thing, and an emergency call from a dad having chest pains and trouble breathing is no exception. But thankfully, an exchange between that dad's 5-year-old daughter and 911 dispatcher Jason Bonham turned out to be more humor than horror. If you missed hearing the recording that has repeatedly gone viral since 2010, you have to hear it now. It's perfectly timeless.
When an Indiana dad used his cell phone to called 911 and couldn't talk, his daughter Savannah picked up the phone. Remaining remarkably calm, cool, and collected, the articulate 5-year-old expertly answered Bonham's questions—and added her own hilarious commentary as well.
5-year-old Savannah did an amazing job staying on the phone until medical help arrived for her dad. Photo by Mark Boss on Unsplash
At Bonham's request, she made sure the front door was unlocked so the emergency crew could get in. She told him about their dog, Lou Lou, who was "small" and "barks a lot," but was "friendly." She consoled her dad—who may have been in the middle of a heart attack—with "Don't worry, Dad," and "Stay calm, Dad." (Cue tears here, wow.)
She also kept the dispatcher up to speed on what was happening, repeatedly saying, "So far, so good." She asked her dad Bonham's questions, like had this ever happened before? Was he having chest pain? Was he able to breathe? She acted as mouthpiece and translator, effortlessly multitasking during the call.
But the pièce de résistance was when Savannah told Bonham that she and her dad were in their "jammies" so she'd have to change. "I don't know what I'm gonna wear, but...he really needs oxygen, real fast."
Five. Years. Old. This kid is seriously something else. Watch:
- YouTube www.youtube.com
Recordings and news clips of the call have racked up millions and millions of views. People just can't believe Savannah's remarkable poise and adorable wit.
"That moment you know you won as a parent," a YouTube commenter said.
"This little girl is extremely bright, & has NOT been raised with a lot of mombo-jumbo baby-talk ; the parents have done a great job of raising a very articulate child" another added.
"This brought tears to my eyes the way she looked after her daddy," someone wrote.
"I defy anyone not to shed a tear when she says 'don't worry Dad!' That is pure perfection," added another.
@crimewave_911 Savannah Hensley, an incredibly brave 5-year-old girl, called 911 to get help for her father, who was experiencing chest pains and was having trouble breathing. The 911 dispatcher was surprised and even thankful for how calm Hensley was in the situation. She was only 5 years old but very composed and aware of the situation at hand. Frank, her father, was in no position to speak, but Savannah was up to the job. What 911 dispatcher Jason Bonham didn't expect was for Savannah to keep him entertained #911 #911call #fyp #fypシ #fypシ゚viral #fypage #crime #crimestories #crimejunkie #brave #saved #story #viral #police
Bonham said he was surprised by how Savannah handled the call. "Most people when you talk to them, they're hysterical," he told Eyewitness News. "Every time I've listened to it it's amazing. She's just a little person."
Thankfully, despite the scare, everything turned out fine for Savannah's dad. When the story went viral, her mom posted on Facebook, "We are so grateful & blessed that Savannah's 911 call is still being circulated. It makes the whole entire night worth while. The more awareness it brings & the more adults that teach children what to do the better!"
The story originally occurred about 15 years ago, which makes Savannah around 20-years-old today. According to posts on her mother's Facebook profile, Savannah looks happy and thriving in her normal, everyday life, despite the story picking up new viewers every single year.
Well done teaching that kiddo, mom and dad. She was truly amazing. And kudos to Jason Bonham for the masterclass in talking a child through a life-threatening emergency. Thanks to these two heroes, everything turned out A-OK for this Indiana family.
This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.
