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A photo collage from the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off.
It's really interesting what nearly 35 years does to the lens of perspective. When my friend invited me to join her family for their once-a-month movie night, she asked which John Hughes movie she should show her 14-year-old twins. The answer was obvious. It had to be something fun, school-related, and iconic. Ferris Bueller's Day Off seemed to be the perfect choice as we Gen X-ers loved it when we were exactly their age in 1986.
The fraternal twins (one boy, one girl) sat down on a rare early Saturday evening when neither had dance practice or a sleepover. We gathered in our comfy clothes, popped some popcorn, and hit "rent now."
They were excited by the opening scene, where an adorable Matthew Broderick (doesn't matter what generation one is, he transcends them all) is pretending to be sick in bed with worrying parents. His sister Jeanie is suspicious and exhausted by his antics, but Ferris prevails. He then proceeds to give a brilliant monologue about eating life up and living in the moment. His now-famous line, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it,” is still plastered in quote books and on Bumble profiles.
The twins seemed inspired, and one of them actually teared up in the first five minutes.
The opening scene from Ferris Bueller's Day Off.www.youtube.com, Paramount Pictures, Film Studies Fundamntals
Spoilers ahead: the movie is pretty simple. Ferris is a super cool high school kid with a beautiful girlfriend, Sloane, played by Mia Sara. His best friend is a depressed hypochondriac named Cameron, who is played to perfection by Alan Ruck. Ferris skips school a lot (nine times!) and grabs each day by the neck. There are themes of Hedonism, Nihilism, and Taoism, but neither of the twins mentioned that.
The first thing both kids DID bring up (after being delighted by the shower monologue) was how privileged the characters were. Affluent Chicago suburbs, after all, was the setting John Hughes knew best. They also noted, as many have over the years, that Ferris seemed rather selfish and insensitive to what others in his life wanted and needed.
A Ferris Buellers Day Off Film GIFGiphy Paramount Pictures
There have been many conversations over the years about Cameron being the true hero of the film. He has a story arc, unlike Ferris, that is unwavering. He's sad, but pushes through it and even gets the guts up to stand up to his father after a Ferrari incident.
In fact, there was a theory that Ferris was a figment of Cameron's imagination—a Fight Club scenario, if you will. Robert Vaux writes on CBR, "The theory holds that the entire day is a fantasy taking place in Cameron's head while he lies sick in bed. His sickness actually supports the theory: once Ferris comes over, it vanishes, and Cameron plunges energetically, if reluctantly, into the events of the day. According to the theory, it's because there are no events of the day. He's still sick at home, and the whole thing is a daydream."
Cameron GIF in Ferris Buellers Day Off 80SGiphy, Paramount Pictures
I fully expected the twins to have similar thoughts. If not the Fight Club part, at least the idea that Cameron was the true protagonist. But what they (both of them) said instead was shocking. "No," the daughter told me. "I mean, I liked Ferris and I loved Cameron. But it's Jeanie who's the hero here."
Jeanie, the sister mentioned earlier, was played with pure rage by Jennifer Grey. She spends most of the movie attempting to narc on Ferris rather than enjoying her own beautiful day. She is angry and determined until…she meets a "bad boy" at the county jail, played complete with bloodshot eyes by Charlie Sheen.
Taken aback, their mom pushed back. "Jeanie, the sister? Why?"
The son answers, "She just changes the most. She starts out, like, having it in for Ferris. Really, having it in for EVERYONE. And then she just like figures it out." The daughter adds, "Yeah, in the end she was rooting for Ferris. She came the farthest from where she started and she's the one who kinda saved him."
Jennifer Grey meets Charlie Sheen in Ferris Bueller's Day Off.www.youtube.com, Paramount Pictures, Tvoldy23
Gobsmacked, I turned to Reddit for more answers. In the subreddit r/movies, someone recently posted, "Something I noticed about Ferris Bueller's Day Off." They then proceed to drive the Cameron theory forward. "At the start of the film, Cameron is in bed sickly and not really confident in himself, but as the movie progresses, he starts to get more confidence, and by the end, he gains the courage to stand up to his father."
A Redditor replies with this thoughtful answer: "I've heard it called a flat character arc when the protagonist doesn't change but is instead the catalyst for those around them to change. It's hard to pull off but is often the most satisfying kind of character. Ted Lasso (especially in season one) is a good example."
Others echo that idea, offering up characters like Forrest Gump and The Dude from The Big Lebowski. They stayed exactly the same while the world or others in their lives changed around them. It's described on a YouTube clip as "The moment you realize the main character is not actually the main character."
The movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off is dissected. www.youtube.com, Paramount Pictures, CinemaStix
This would give credence to the twins' opinion. But I'd never heard anyone choose Jeanie before, and they weren't swayed by Grey's performance in Dirty Dancing because they haven't seen it yet. When pressed one more time, their answer didn't change. "No doubt, it's the sister. She should have a spinoff." Their mom was so proud and we all totally agree.
A stressed millennial mom and her parents.
The baby boomer generation is often called the "Me Generation" because after the social upheaval of the ‘60s, they began to focus on themselves, prioritizing wealth accumulation, personal growth, self-help programs, and fitness. Now that baby boomers are grandparents, some millennials aren’t too happy that the Me Generation has taken that ethos into their golden years.
Although it’s important not to paint every generation member with the same brush, many older millennial parents feel that their baby boomer parents, known for being the least involved in recent history, are acting the same way as grandparents. Mother Phyllis, a popular TikToker with much to say about boomer grandparents, recently shared a video about how her parents live 40 minutes away and put very little effort into being grandparents, but brag about how much they love their grandchildren on social media.
The crux of Phyllis’ point is that older millennials had grandparents involved in their lives, but their parents don’t have the same dedication.
@motherphyllis Can anyone else relate?????? I should’ve said absent grandmother’s not grandparents but y’all know what I mean 🤣 #fyp #fypシ #fypage #viral #fyp #viral #millennial #boomer #momlife #mom #sahm #funny @laneige_us
“My mom comes over for her yearly visit and snaps a picture of the kids. Or sometimes she doesn't even do that. She'll just take a picture off my Facebook page, post it to her Facebook page, and say, 'I love hanging out with my grandkids so much,'" Phillis says in a video with over 200,000 views. “They're so amazing. And then her friends comment and say, ‘Being a grandparent is so amazing, it's just so great.’” Phyillis adds that when she had a child, her boomer parents didn’t show much interest in helping after her birth, saying that helping out was her husband's job.
A boomer grandma ready to post on Facebook.via Canva/Photos
The post resonated with many people in the comments who are having the same struggles with their boomer parents. "Their parents raised us. They didn’t even want to be parents, so they’re sure as hell not gonna be grandparents," Kim wrote. "I mean, you think having boomer grandparents are bad, try having them raise you. Generation X basically raised ourselves because they’re busy," Queen added.
A big reason why parents like Phyliis feel betrayed by their parents for refusing to be involved in their children’s lives is that they probably had grandparents who were involved in theirs. Many older millennials and Gen Xers had grandparents involved in their upbringing, providing daycare, babysitting, and making social visits, because their grandmothers were raised to be homemakers and didn’t have jobs. So their lifestyle was more geared to taking care of children. Boomer women were much more likely to have had careers and still work to this day.
@motherphyllis Millennials just can’t understand the way some boomers act If I’m being honest ##fyp##foryoupage##fypシ##fypage##mom##sahm##momlife##honest##truth##relatable##millennial##boomer##generation##millennialstothemoon##phyllis
“Here’s the thing, though: it’s statistically more likely that your own grandmothers were homemakers, at least from the time they had children,” DeeDee Moore, a grandparenting influencer, writes for Scary Mommy. “They were home to watch you after school, or host you and your cousins for weeks during the summer. Starting with the baby boomer generation, women were more likely to be in the workforce, making babysitting grandkids and cousin camp harder to pull off.”
While parents like Phyllis have a good reason to be upset that their parents aren’t involved in their children’s lives, everyone’s situation is different, so we can’t bash all boomers for being uninvolved in their grandchildren’s lives. However, their accusation does follow a significant generational trend: Gen Xers and older Millennials, known by some as Generation Goonie, were raised in a world with very little parental involvement. So, it's unsurprising that their children have grandparents who may not be around much.
This article originally appeared in April
Checking expiration dates is always a good idea, but so is knowing when they matter.
You're getting ready to cook dinner, so you start pulling ingredients out of your pantry. As you pick up a package of pasta, you realize you bought it a long time ago, so you search for a date. The "best by" date passed two months ago. Is it okay to eat it? Will it make you and your family sick? Is it worth taking a risk? Is there really a risk at all with pasta?
That's only the beginning of the questions when it comes to dating food items. What's the difference between "sell by" and "best by" and "use by" and "expiration" dates? What if the package just has a date with no words or letters to indicate which of those it is? Does "best by" mean it just isn't fresh past that date? Does "expires" mean it might kill you if you eat it?
What if a food just has a date but no other indicators on it? Photo credit: Canva
You're not alone. Food packaging dates are befuddling because get this: there are no real regulations or national standards that determine how they're decided.
In reality, a lot of foods—especially dry packaged foods—can be safely consumed well past any of those dates. They may lose optimal freshness, and they might taste stale, but generally speaking, the dates don't mean what people think they mean. In fact, they don't really have a well-defined meaning at all.
Is this a package date? Sell by date? Use by date? Best by date? Photo credit: Canva
“It is a complete Wild West,” Dana Gunders, executive director of ReFed (a nonprofit trying to end food waste) told CNN. "Many consumers really believe that they are being told to throw the food out, or that even when they don’t make that choice, that they’re sort of breaking some rule."
According to America's Test Kitchen's science editor Paul Adams, the dates on foods are almost entirely about freshness and taste quality and not about safety. The USDA website states, "Manufacturers provide dating to help consumers and retailers decide when food is of best quality. Except for infant formula, dates are not an indicator of the product’s safety and are not required by Federal law."
- YouTubewww.youtube.com
Which brings us to the handful of foods whose expiration dates actually do matter and that you shouldn't overlook or ignore because there is some food safety risk involved. No one wants listeria, salmonella, botulism, or other forms of foodborne illness (more commonly known as food poisoning).
Along with baby formula, it's important to pay attention to dates on fresh meat and fish, deli meats, and unpasteurized cheeses. But for the vast majority of other foods, using your senses to check for signs of spoilage and having a sense of how long certain foods will last once opened will tell you more than the date on the package will.
Your senses can tell you a lot about whether food is good to consume.Photo credit: Canva
Signs of spoilage include an "off" smell or taste, a change in color, and changes in texture (many foods develop a slippery or slimy feel when they start to spoil). If you see signs of mold, in some cases the whole package should be thrown out (such as bread) or the moldy parts can be cut off (such as hard cheeses, cutting off an inch past the mold). For fresh fruits and vegetables that start to get moldy, a general rule is if it's hard/firm, you can cut the moldy part off plus an inch, and if it's soft/squishy, throw it out. (The USDA has a helpful chart to see which foods can still be used with mold cut off and which should be tossed.)
Knowing how long foods generally last once opened or purchased will also help you gauge when a food is too iffy to consume. FoodSafety.gov has a handy cold food storage chart that you can even download as a PDF if you want to print it out and put it in your kitchen for quick reference.
And, of course, there's the wise adage, "When in doubt, throw it out." But with the few exceptions listed above, dates on packages aren't the primary thing that should lead you to doubt.
Gen Z kids appalled by lack of internet safety of Millennial teens
The late 90s and early 2000s were certainly interesting times to come of age in America, and elder Millennials were the guinea pigs. We are part of what is known as a micro-generation, often referring to ourselves as the Oregon Trail Generation or Xennials due to our very unique experience of coming of age during the Internet's infancy.
Because we were the first teenagers exposed to the Internet in school and out, there were very little restrictions on what we were allowed to do online. It was essentially the Wild West and we were pretty oblivious to the dangers as were our parents, so no one was checking to see what we were doing. During a chat with my Gen Z kids recently, they recalled all the restrictions placed on them around electronics with access to the Internet. One bravely dared to ask if my parents were as strict about Internet use in the 1900s.
oregon trail 80s GIFGiphy
They love to pull the 1900s card as if we were all churning butter on our front porches waiting for our pa to come back from town in a horse drawn carriage. I play along by talking in a drawn out old timey southern accent (I'm from Pennsylvania) to say something along the lines of, "Back in my day we had to walk up the Internet hills both ways while waiting for our dialup connection. Ma and Pa didn't even know how to turn the dang flabbin computer on I reckon so we talked to a lot of strangers in a far off land called an AOL chatroom and told them our ASL."
Surprised students with books and open mouths against orange background.Photo credit: Canva
After explaining that ASL stood for "Age, Sex, Location" and not American Sign Language they were genuinely concerned. My younger one asked if we gave out accurate information and their older brother confidently said something about the use of a VPN. The looks of absolute horror that came across their faces when I broke the news that there was no VPN and I wasn't sure they existed then were truly something to behold. Suddenly, I was being scolded by two teenagers telling me how dangerous it is to share you location with strangers on the Internet. One of them even threatened to tell my mother, though I'm not quite sure what they thought the result would be there
Their questions, shock, and seeming disappointment grew when I shared we would meet some of these strangers at the mall and some friends even had them pick them up from their houses. My youngest Gen Zer gasped at that revelation, asking, "How are y'all still alive? Didn't you watch Unsolved Mysteries with that creepy guy telling you all about kids disappearing?"
Surprised by what he sees on the tablet!Photo credit: Canva
Of course we watched Unsolved Mysteries and of course we didn't think those things could happen to us. The perk of being a teenager is truly believing that you're invincible while also never fully thinking through the consequences of impulsive decisions. Thankfully, myself and all of my high school and college friends made it to the other side without ending up another story for Robert Stack to tell.
Our late adolescence is also likely the reason many elder Millennials are so vigilant with our children's Internet access. We know what we were doing while unsupervised on the Internet and how quickly technology can develop, leaving parents in the dark and teenagers exposed to dangers. But having the conversation really opened the floor to deeper discussion about Internet safety and additional precautions I took while raising them in a world immersed in the quick paced advancements of the World Wide Web.
Internet Web Surfing GIFGiphy
I'm the first to admit that they have reached the age where they have completely surpassed my knowledge of all things Internet. My oldest son rolls his eyes as I call him "Tech Support" when I can't figure something out just as I rolled my eyes when my parents would call me after class to ask where they were supposed to type a web address. Technology is inherently for the young. Sure, old fogies like me and older can catch on and use it, but we're slower at jumping on the bandwagon. We don't particularly like a lot of change and we also don't want to be left behind, which usually keeps us in the same role with our parents that we put our children in with us–show me how you work this thing.
