In short, keep a couple of bottles of your favorite spirit handy, and take a drink every time you hear about one of these things:
- Any time anyone mentions Eli Whitney or the cotton gin, you are going to take a shot of gin.
- “Why isn’t there a White History Month?” “Why can’t we watch White Entertainment Television?”
- For every sepia-toned commercial about Martin Luther King Jr., Malcolm X, or JFK, take a shot.
- When Don Lemon turns his back on his race, take a shot.
- Any time someone compares Obama, Malcolm X, or Mahatma Gandhi to MLK, take a shot.
- Any time you hear these words or phrases, take a sip:
- Affirmative action
- The race card
- Police brutality
- Al Sharpton
- The black community
- Disenfranchised
- Segregation
- Prefacing any sentence with “no offense”
- Any numerical estimate for how many people are at a protest
- Finish your drink any time someone wonders whether MLK’s dream will ever be realized.
- Any time anyone is asked to speak on behalf of all black people, take a shot.
Black History Month is during the shortest month of the year. Anyone playing along with Akilah will be relieved it’s only 28 days, I’m betting.
