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These awesome teens take tampons to school to help their friends in case of an 'emergency'

These awesome teens take tampons to school to help their friends in case of an 'emergency'
via Tara Ahrens

Earlier this month, blogger Tara Ahrens posted a photo of her teenage sons, Micah, 15, and Elijah, 16, to the private Facebook page Pantsuit Nation, and it received over 65,000 reactions.

It was an image of them back-to-school shopping at Target that read: "My teenage boys helped me shop today which included buying their little sister's first bras … because breasts happen."

"Both boys carry a tampon and a pad in their backpacks in case one of their friends needs one," she continued. "Just a mom out here, trying to erase gender taboo!!"


via Tara Ahrens

Ahrens' comfort discussing menstruation with her teenage sons was a breath of fresh air for many on the Pantsuit Nation page.

It broke down a long-standing taboo surrounding teenage boys and periods. Most males of that age group live in a mensuration-free bubble, only to learn the ropes when they become husbands or fathers.

While some men reject any involvement with menstruation or period products for their entire lives.

It also prompted a lot of people to ask themselves an important question: Why can't boys help their friends when they're having period troubles?

RELATED: Male athlete gets roasted for comparing period pain to skinned knees

She discussed the origins of her idea in a blog post she wrote for CafeMom:

I first started talking about this with them last year, after reading an article about a man on the Appalachian Trail who gave a tampon from his backpack to a woman who had bled through. He reportedly said something like, "It's no big deal; I grew up with a mom and sisters … " and that rocked my world. As I was driving in my car one day, I looked at my boys in the rearview mirror and nonchalantly told them that they should probably put a tampon in their backpacks in case any of their friends had an emergency. They seemed to think it over and didn't say much, because teenagers.

Intrigued by her taboo-busting, out-of-the-box parenting skills, Upworthy got the chance to speak with Ahrens about the discomfort our society has surrounding menstruation and how people have reacted to her unique parenting policy.

Upworthy: What were your sons' first reactions to you asking them to carry period products with them to school?

Tara Ahrens: When I nonchalantly suggested they carry a tampon in their backpacks, they were a little surprised. I explained that it might come in handy in case one of their friends has a crisis at school. We had already discussed periods and how traumatic it can be for a girl to have a bleed-through at school, so they already knew to behave like a gentleman and never mock or laugh. It was a logical next step for them to just tell their friends they always have products, in case they ever need one.

Upworthy: What do the teachers at your sons' school think about theirwillingness to help out their friends when they've having period problems?

Tara Ahrens: This has all snowballed so quickly that they really haven't had a chance to discuss it with many teachers. The few that read the the article think it's "awesome," "astounding," "so cool," and they love all of it.

via Tara Ahrens

Upworthy: What does their father think about it?

Tara Ahrens: My husband, Lucas, is a bit puzzled by the response on the internet. He says "if someone needs help, you help them; that's just being a good human."

Upworthy: Have you inspired any other parents you know to do the same thing?

Tara Ahrens: I have some friends of girls who have said they appreciate this. Some of my friends will remember it for the future (when their sons are older). I have talked with a few friends who love the idea of this; but their sons don't have the same personalities as my boys so this approach wouldn't be a good fit for their families. They have mentioned discussing menstruation more often to normalize it.

Upworthy: I'm sure that a lot of parents who read this article will want to encourage their sons to do the same. Do you have any advice for helping them approach such a sensitive topic?

Tara Ahrens: My advice to other parents is; know your child! Like all parenting ideas, some will work for our children and others we just disregard. If your son is in a friend group that is both male and female and they are a kid not easily swayed by the opinions of others, this might be a great fit.

You get to that point by taking the embarrassment and shame out of menstruation conversations from the time they are young. I've always given my kids short, age appropriate, medical answers. Long talks do not work, but a bunch of quick, teachable moments over time, can easily erase any taboos.

RELATED: Ack! I need chocolate! The science of PMS food cravings

Upworthy: It's 2019, why is menstruation still such an uncomfortable topic for many?

Tara Ahrens: I think that menstruation has been a tricky thing historically. It has definitely been used to control women. The fact that women were referred to as "unclean" is a stigma that still exists. Women have been told their thoughts are "crazy" or "unclean" based on their "time of the month". This misconception is going to take time to change. The more we talk frankly and biologically about it, the more we can normalize it.

Upworthy: What's the most common criticism you've received from talking about menstruation?

Tara Ahrens: The most common, and surprising criticism, is that my boys are somehow forcing tampons on strangers. I think a lot of people read a title and based on their own period shame, their first response is "No." The truth is, my boys have discussed this with their existing friend group.

Another baffling comment is that girls and women should handle this themselves. Period poverty in the USA is a very big reality. Our school is a low-income school. Fifty-one percent of girls nationwide miss out on classroom time due to a lack of period products. We have students who don't have a "mom" or even a mom-figure in their life. We have students who don't have a home. To insinuate that everyone has access to the same resources is pretty asinine. No girl should suffer just because she doesn't have access to period products. Generosity and kindness are choices we make and they are not gender-related.

Many doubters scoffed at the idea that any teenage girl would ever ask a boy for a period product. They are wrong! The day my essay for CafeMom was published, Elijah came home in need of more supplies because one of his friends came to him with an emergency. He's been asked twice. It is working!

I'm not any better of a mom than anyone else. I'm winging it and trying to add some big teachable moments in between the extreme living that is parenting four kids.

via Tara Ahrens

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Three women, three MS journeys: How multiple sclerosis looks different for everyone

Gina, Nathalie and Helga share their reactions to being diagnosed with MS and how they stay informed and positive in the face of ever-changing symptoms.

Courtesy of Sanofi

Helga, Nathalie and Gina all have MS, and their experiences show how differently the disease can manifest.

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It’s been 155 years since neurologist Jean-Martin Charcot gave the first lecture on a mysterious progressive illness he called “multiple sclerosis.” Since then, we’ve learned a lot. We know MS causes the immune system to attack healthy tissue, including damaging the brain and spinal cord. Resulting symptoms can be debilitating and include fatigue, blurred vision, memory problems and weakness. Huge advancements in our understanding of MS and its underlying causes, as well as treatment advances, have been made in the past few decades, but MS remains a complex and unpredictable reality for the 2.8 million+ people diagnosed around the world.

Ironically, the only real constant for people living with MS is change. There’s no set pattern or standard progression of the disease, so each person’s experience is unique. Some people with MS have mild symptoms that worsen slowly but sometimes improve, while others can have severe symptoms that drastically alter their daily lives.

All people with MS share some things in common, however, such as the need to stay informed on the ever-evolving research, find various lines of support and try to remain hopeful as they continue living with the disease.

To better understand what navigating life with MS really looks like, three women shared their MS stories with us. Their journeys demonstrate how MS can look different for different people and interestingly, how the language used to talk about the disease can greatly impact how people understand their realities.

woman with horse, woman riding horseGina loves riding her horse, Benita.Courtesy of Sanofi

Gina—Hamburg, Germany (diagnosed with relapsing multiple sclerosis in 2017)

When her youngest son was 4 months old, Gina started having problems with her eye. She’d soon learn she was experiencing optic neuritis—her first symptom of MS.

“Immediately after the diagnosis, I looked up facts on MS because I didn’t know anything about it,” Gina says. “And as soon as I knew what could really happen with this disease, I actually got scared.”

As her family’s primary income provider, she worried about how MS would impact her ability to work as a writer and editor. Her family was afraid she was going to end up in a wheelchair. However, for now, Gina’s MS is managed well enough that she still works full-time and is able to be active.

“When I tell somebody that I have MS, they often don't believe me the first time because I don't fulfill any stereotypes,” she says.

Overwhelmed by negative perspectives on living with MS, Gina sought support in the online MS community, which she found to be much more positive.

“I think it’s important to use as many positive words as you can when talking about MS.” It’s important to be realistic while also conveying hope, she says. “MS is an insidious disease that can cause many bad symptoms…that can be frightening, and you can't gloss over it, either.”

To give back to the online community that helped her so much, Gina started a blog to share her story and help others trying to learn about their diagnosis.

Though she deals with fatigue and cognitive dysfunction sometimes, Gina stays active swimming, biking, riding horses and playing with her sons, who are now 11 and 6.

Cognitive dysfunction is common in MS, with over half of people affected. It can impact memory, attention, planning, and word-finding. As with many aspects of MS, some people experience mild changes, while others face more challenges.

Gina says that while there’s still a lot of education about MS needed, she feels positive about the future of MS because there’s so much research being done.

woman in wheelchair holding medal, woman rowingNathalie is an award-winning rower with multiple international titles.Courtesy of Sanofi

Nathalie — Pennes Mirabeau, France (diagnosed with relapsing-remitting multiple sclerosis in 2002)

Nathalie was a teenager and a competitive athlete when she noticed her first symptoms of MS, but it would take four years of “limbo” before she was diagnosed.

“Ultimately, the diagnosis was more of a relief, than a shock,” she says. “Because when you have signs and you don’t know why, it’s worse than knowing, in the end, what you have.”

However, learning more about the disease—and the realities of disease progression—scared her.

“That glimpse of the future was direct and traumatic,” she says. Her neurologist explained that the disease evolves differently for everyone, and her situation might end up being serious or very mild. So, she decided to stop comparing herself to others with MS.

She said to herself, “We’ll see what happens, and you’ll manage it bit by bit.”

By 2005, Nathalie’s MS had progressed to the point of needing a wheelchair. However, that has not dampened her competitive spirit.

Nathalie began her international rowing career in 2009 and has won multiple world titles, including two Paralympic medals—silver in London and bronze in Tokyo. Now, at 42, she still trains 11 times a week. Fatigue can be a problem, and sometimes hard workouts leave her with muscle stiffness and shaking, but she credits her ongoing sports career for helping her feel in tune with her body’s signals.

“Over the years, I’ve learned to listen to my body, letting my body guide when I need to stop and take breaks,” she says.

Nathalie explains that she used to only look backwards because of the initial shock of her diagnosis. In time, she stopped thinking about what she couldn’t do anymore and focused on her future. She now lives in the following mindset: “Even when doors close, don’t miss out on those that open.” Instead of focusing on what she can’t do, she focuses on the opportunities she still has. Right now, this includes her training for the 2024 Paralympic Games in Paris, where she will compete for another rowing medal.

“I only go forward,” she says. “Well, I try, anyway…It’s easy to say, it’s not always easy to do. But that’s what I try to do.”

woman exiting water after swimming, woman with great daneHelga's Great Dane has become a helpful and beloved companion.Courtesy of Sanofi

Helga—Johannesburg, South Africa (diagnosed with relapsing multiple sclerosis in 2010)

When Helga first started having balance issues and numbness in her feet, she chalked it up to her training as a runner. But when the numbness moved to her face, she knew something was wrong. She never guessed it was MS.

“When I was diagnosed, I felt completely overwhelmed and clueless,” Helga says. “I felt that I had nowhere near enough information. I did not know anything about the disease…I had no idea that it was going to be a process of continually monitoring and adjusting your lifestyle.”

In the beginning, Helga’s symptoms developed slowly, and she didn’t appear ill to others. She was even able to run for a few years after her diagnosis, but she couldn’t do marathons anymore, and she began to fall frequently due to balance issues and right-foot dragging. Then her cognition issues became more problematic, especially in her job as a trainer in a printing company.

“My executive function, decision-making and short-term memory were affected to the point that I was eventually medically unfit for work,” she says. She stopped working in 2017.

However, she didn’t stop living life. Even though she could no longer run, she continued to swim competitively. She got a Great Dane puppy and trained him as a service dog to help her walk. She also serves as vice chair of the patient support organization Multiple Sclerosis South Africa, and she advises others who have been diagnosed to join a patient advocacy group as soon as possible to get reliable information and meet others with MS.

Helga says she is “hopeful” about the future of MS. “I must say that I am so grateful that we have all the new medications available, because my life would not be the same if it wasn't for that,” she adds.

Part of how she manages her MS is by looking at the positives.

“If I could tell the world one thing about MS, it would be that MS is an incurable disease of the nervous system, but it's also the greatest teacher of valuing your health, family, friends, and managing change in your life,” she says. “My life is diversified in a way that I never, ever thought it would, and MS has been honestly the greatest teacher.”

Each MS journey is unique – with each person impacted experiencing different struggles, successes, and feelings as they manage this unpredictable disease. But the common thread is clear – there is a critical need for information, support, and hope. We are proud to participate in World MS Day and share these incredible stories of living life while living with MS. To learn more about MS, go to https://www.sanofi.com/why-words-really-matter-when-it-comes-to-multiple-sclerosis.

MAT-GLB-2301642-v1.0-05/2023

This article was sponsored by Sanofi. Participants were compensated when applicable.

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