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6 things women put up with in the gym, and why they shouldn't have to

Harassment in the gym takes many different forms, and it's a serious problem.

John Arano/Unsplash

Finding the motivation to go to the gym isn't easy for anyone. But it can be much harder for women, for reasons that have nothing to do with actually working out.

Knowing they're likely walking into a hornet's nest of people (men) who will bother, critique, stare at, or otherwise harass and annoy them is an unfortunate reality for many female gym-goers.

woman standing surrounded by exercise equipment Photo by Danielle Cerullo on Unsplash



About 14% of women say they're intimidated by the possibility of men leering or judging them while they work out, according to research done by Cosmopolitan Body in 2014.

The problem gets even worse in the weights section, which is typically overrun with men. The survey discovered almost half of all women found the area intimidating because of "the people who use it."

Anecdotal evidence backs that up. Reddit and fitness discussion forums are rife with women asking for advice on dealing with men at the gym who gawk, flirt, interrupt, or even harass them. The common (and quite depressing) responses: develop a "resting bitch face," learn to be super rude, get better at ignoring people, or report these men to gym management.

Instead, we ought to be reminding men they don't own the gym; women shouldn't have to "put up with" rude behavior or "find a way" to not attract attention. Wouldn't it be better for everyone if women didn't have to deal with harassment at all?

So, fellow dudes and fellow gym go-ers, I implore you, think for a second about the gym harassment women have to go through.

And if you catch yourself or your friends doing any of this stuff, please cut it out.

1. Women can tell when you're staring at them, and it's not as flattering as you think.

Making a woman feel "on display" by leering when she's just trying to get a workout in is a surefire way to make her feel uncomfortable or even scared. And no, tight pants and sports bras aren't an invitation.

Think a lingering glance here and there isn't a big deal? Upworthy reader Meredith Cantrell says many of the women she knows actually drive to "gay neighborhoods" to work out so they won't be gawked at.

Totally unnecessary if guys can learn to keep our eyes to ourselves.

2. Women go to the gym to work out (like everyone else) — not speed-date between sets.

It's not that you can't meet that special someone at the gym, but there's a time and a place. Flirting with a woman at the gym when she's in the middle of lifting weights or grinding out miles on the treadmill is neither the time nor place.

Not only is it super rude to interrupt (honestly, you're not going to get a good response doing this anyway), it's also pretty dangerous to distract someone while they're, say, holding the equivalent of their own bodyweight on their back while doing squats. Yet, incredibly, it happens all the time.

A good rule of thumb: When someone's wearing headphones, it usually means they don't want to talk to anyone. Even you, handsome.

3. When women lift heavy weights, guys around them get insecure and lash out.

Reader Emma Johnson writes that one day, while working with her trainer, she hit a pretty impressive 250-kilogram leg press (over 550 pounds — go Emma!). A jealous guy standing nearby couldn't help but chime in, "Yeah, but you're doing it wrong."

Look, guys, women are strong. Sometimes they will be stronger than you. Deal with it like an adult and get back to work on your own fitness goals.

4. Unsolicited advice isn't helpful. It's insulting.

When people want help, they'll ask, or they'll hire a personal trainer. In the meantime, worry about your own "form." OK?

Laurna Robertson says she was talking to a "persistent guy" in the sauna at her gym one day when the subject of running came up. After sharing their respective half-marathon times (Laurna was faster, by the way), the man "generously" offered to coach her. What a guy!

Sophia Bromfield adds, "I have a corner in the gym to hide while I lift," but one day a dude stood next to her until she took her headphones off, then insisted on teaching her proper lunge form.

This is the gym version of mansplaining. It's annoying and insulting. Don't do it.

5. Some guys just don't know when to go away. Others are straight-up bullies.

Being "overly friendly" with questionable motivations is one thing, but some women find men at the gym can be downright nasty, purposefully intimidating them or boxing them out so they'll leave.

The gym is a shared space. Other people pay money to go there, just like you. If you don't want to be around other humans, buy a home gym.

Also, beware of unconscious behaviors like "manspreading," taking up more room than you need, or stealing someone's weights before they're done with them.

6. These behaviors aren't just annoying. They can be extremely intimidating.

At a certain point, these behaviors cross the line from rude and inappropriate to downright scary.

Ashley Loshbough writes that a man once came up to her (asking her to remove her headphones, which, just ugh) and said, "Wow, I wish I had beautiful [pale] skin like yours," stared for a moment, then walked off.

It might sound funny and harmless, but this is the kind of thing that has women looking over their shoulder in the parking lot and wondering if they should ever come back to that gym again.

A little empathy goes a long way, fellas.

Do you want someone gawking at your butt while you're on the treadmill? Interrupting you while you're holding heavy weights? Impatiently waiting inches away from you until you finish up on a machine?

Let's work together to keep this crap out of the gym and make it an environment where we support others to reach whatever their health and fitness goals are.

Even if that means just leaving each other alone.


This article originally appeared on 4.6.17

Wrinkle the emotional support duck turned heads at the NYC Marathon.

Well, here's something you don't see every day. Or, um, ever.

The New York City Marathon took place this past Sunday, as 33,000 runners of all shapes and sizes ran the 26.2 miles from Staten Island to Central Park. Among them was a runner no one would have expected—an energetic white duck named Wrinkle.

Wrinkle's owner shared her triumphant running videos on TikTok and YouTube, which highlight Wrinkle's daily doings, and people have been sharing them with great joy on social media. Who can blame them? Ducks are adorable. Ducks in shoes are super adorable. And a duck in shoes running in a marathon is too adorable to handle.

I mean, watch this and try not to smile.

Wrinkle's owner wrote on the video share on YouTube:

Wrinkle the duck is more than just a beautiful pekin duck,

she is a full grown adult human child

She is fast

She is speed

She is zoom

She is wrinkle

Still fast as duck boiiii

The video of Wrinkle running in the marathon has garnered more than 4 million views on TikTok and thousands of comments.

One commenter wrote, "I know this may seem silly, but I've been so deeply depressed lately and seeing this little lady running has actually made me smile."

Wrinkle responded: "As an official emotional support duck hearing this makes me feel like I'm doing my job well. Wrinkle loves you."

Some famous brands got in on the comments as well.

Duolingo—the language app with an owl for an icon—wrote, "That's my cousin!"

Adidas wrote, "Sending this to our design team to petition for a new duck shoe collection."

The New York Rangers hockey team wrote, "She's a runner, she's a track star" (a reference to the song "Track Star"—of course, several commenters chimed in to correct it to "quack star").

Peloton wrote, "You're hired your first class will be a 20 min Hip Hop Waddle."

The Anaheim Ducks hockey team: "Legendary duck."

(Aflac, surprisingly, missed the opportunity.)

Undoubtedly, Wrinkle did not run the entire 26.2 miles, but however much she ran was totally worth it. If you're wondering how Wrinkle trained for her five minutes of fame, check this out (with the sound up, please):

@seducktiv

Duck Feet on Hardwood Floors 🧀 #oddlysatisfying #narutorun #zoomies #asmrsounds #wrinkletheduck #foryou

Okay, wrinkle. You've won us over with your cute widdle waddle and the pitter patter of your widdle footsies. The shoes are really just icing on the cake.

In a world filled with division and strife, perhaps we can all agree on the delight Wrinkle the emotional support duck brings to us all.

Follow Wrinkle's adventures on TikTok and YouTube.

Every so often, a once-in-a-generation athlete appears on the scene, and we've just witnessed one of those athletes fly through the Olympic trials and emerge as the fastest woman in the U.S.

21-year-old Sha'carri Richardson is only five feet one-inch tall, and she ran the 100-meter dash against a headwind in only 10.86 seconds, handily beating out the other nine runners on the track.

It wasn't just the win that has people talking. It was how she pulled ahead in the final half of the sprint. It was how she pointed to the clock in the final 30 meters of the semifinal heat, knowing she was dominating the field. It's the visual flair—the flaming orange hair, huge eyelashes, and long, bejeweled nails. And it was her rush to the stands to bury her face into her beloved grandmother's lap after her final heat win.

Richardson had been a teenage track star, taking home multiple national titles during her high school years. After a year running collegiate track at LSU, she decided to go professional. She knows she's good, and she wants the world to know that she knows.


"I just want the world to know that I'm that girl," she told NBC Sports after the semifinal run. "Every time I step on the track, I'm going to try to do what it is that me, my coach (and) my support team believe I can do, and (with) the talent that God blessed me to have."

She finished the semifinal heat with a time of 10.64 seconds, pointing to the time clock in the final stretch. Since it was aided with a tailwind, it doesn't count toward her personal best (which currently stands at 10.72 seconds, making her the second-fastest woman in the world, only behind Jamaica's Shelly Ann Fraser-Price). But the flourish counts for something.



"When you stand five feet one-inch tall, you get told your entire life what you can and cannot do," the announcer said in the lead-up to the final Olympic trial. "That chip on her shoulder is because every time she's been told that. She's been able to overcome those odds and get it done."

In a post-race interview, Richardson talked about how much her family and coach's support means to her.

"My grandmother is my heart," Richardson said after the race. "My grandmother is my superwoman, so to be able to have her here for the biggest meet in my life and being able to cross the finish line and run up the steps knowing I'm an Olympian now is just so amazing."

She revealed in a television interview after returning to the track that she had found out her biological mother had passed away the week before. In praising her family and coach, Richardson began to choke up.

"Nobody knows what I go through," she said. "Everybody has struggles and I understand that. Y'all see me on this track and y'all see the poker face that I put on, but nobody but them and my coach knows what I go through on a day-to-day basis. And I'm highly grateful to them. Without them, there would be no me. Without my grandmother, there would be no Sha'carri Richardson. My family is my everything. My everything, until the day I'm done."

Watch the final heat and post-race interview here:

Sha'Carri Richardson, now America's fastest woman, scorches her Olympic Trials final | NBC Sportswww.youtube.com

Dick and Rick Hoyt were an unforgettable team.

The father and son duo ran their first race together in 1977, after Rick told his dad that he wanted to participate in a 5-mile charity run for a lacrosse player who'd been paralyzed in an accident. Rick has cerebral palsy and is a quadriplegic, so Dick agreed to push him in his wheelchair while he ran. They came in next-to-last, but the experience opened up a whole new world for them.

"Dad, when I'm running, it feels like my disability disappears," Rick told his dad after that race. From then on, Dick ran as many races with his son as he could.

Over the next four decades, Dick and Rick would participate in over 1,000 races together, including completing the Boston Marathon 32 times. They even completed duathlons and triathlons, with Dick using a bungee attached to a vest he wore to pull Rick in a boat while he swam, and using a two-seater bicycle during the cycling portions of the races.


What Dick helped Rick achieve was extraordinary, especially considering the fact that when he was born, doctors had told Dick and his wife Judy that Rick should be institutionalized since he had little chance of ever living a "normal" life. Instead, Dick and Judy embarked on a mission of inclusion for Rick in school, community, sports, and the workplace. They worked with engineers at Tufts University to get Rick an interactive computer in 1972 so he could communicate with taps of his head. Their tireless efforts eventually led to Rick graduating from Boston University with a degree in Special Education in 1993.

Throughout it all, Dick and Rick would run races together. In 1992, they biked and ran together across the entire U.S.—a full 3,735 miles in 45 days. After some health concerns, Dick was set to retire from marathon running after the Boston Marathon in 2013, but the bombing made it so they couldn't participate, so they ran it in 2014 instead. In 2015, he served as the Grand Marshall of the race.

Dick Hoyt, this loving father who embodied dedication, passed away peacefully in his sleep on Wednesday. He was 80 years old.

The Boston Athletic Association released a statement:

"The B.A.A. is tremendously saddened to learn of the passing of Boston Marathon icon Dick Hoyt. Dick personified what it meant to be a Boston Marathoner, showing determination, passion, and love every Patriots Day for more than three decades. He was not only a fan favorite who inspired thousands, but also a loyal friend and father who took pride in spending quality time with his son Rick while running from Hopkinton to Boston."

Dick's other sons, Russ and Rob Hoyt, broke the news to Rick about their father's death.

"He's sad, as we all are, but he's OK," Russ told the Associated Press. "You could see it in him, it was like someone hit him."

Rick was once asked what he would give his father if he could give him one thing, and Rick responded, "The thing I'd most like is for my dad to sit in the chair and I would push him for once."

But Russ Hoyt wants the world to know that Dick's dedication went beyond running with his disabled son.

"I know it's a cliche, but I want people to know that I thought my father was a hero, not just because he pushed Rick in the marathon, but because he was a great father to all of us you could talk to about anything," he said. "He inspired people to look at all their children as equals no matter their disability."

In addition to his service to his family, Dick Hoyt was a 37-year veteran of the Air National Guard, retiring as Lt. Colonel in 1995.

Rest in peace, Mr. Hoyt. Thank you for serving as a tireless example of dedication and determination for us all.