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Nine things new parents think they need and the more practical alternatives.

No, you actually don't need a 'pee pee teepee.'

new parents; baby; newborn; baby items
Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

Things new parents think they need but don't.

There's nothing like preparing for a new baby. The excitement and anticipation take hold and before you know what's happening, your baby registry is five pages long full of things you've probably never heard of. I've been there before, and now, four kids later, I can tell you with absolute certainty that there are tons of things you actually don't need. It's easy to get carried away when everything is so tiny and cute, especially 'cause marketing around baby stuff is bananas. The following offers some alternative items to the ones you'll likely only use a limited number of times before practicality takes over.

Many of us have been there, standing in the baby aisle looking like we're smuggling an oddly shaped beach ball under our now-too-small maternity shirt contemplating between the many styles of pacifiers and different types of bottles. You'd be forgiven for spending an insane amount of money on bottles shaped like a deflated spaceship that guarantee your baby will never burp, when two weeks after they're born you find out your baby actually prefers the $0.98 ones from Walmart. Figuring out what you really need is tricky enough, so let me help you out. Hold on to your bellies or shiny new babies folks, this list might blow your mind.

Baby wipes.

Baby wipes from Amazon

1. Put the Pee Pee Teepee down and back away slowly.

Aside from the word "teepee" being highly inappropriate for non-Indigenous people to use, you can go ahead and take this bad boy off your baby registry. If you're not familiar with a "pee pee teepee," it's a cone-shaped item that goes on top of your little guy's business so he doesn't accidentally pee in his eyes or on the unsuspecting diaper changer. Here's the thing, baby wipes or a baby washcloth work just as well. When my boys were little I'd just throw a wipe over their baby business while I changed the diaper, and once the dirty diaper was off, it's easy to toss the used wipe in before trashing the diaper. Easy peasy and it's one less thing to put on your list.

Disposable diaper bags.

Disposable diaper bags from Amazon

2. Diaper Genies are unnecessary and it's easy to forget they exist.

I had such high hopes for my Diaper Genie as a first-time mom. They're so cool, you shove a dirty diaper in there and twist. That's it. It locks in the odor and makes a weird-looking segmented snake of dirty diapers. Alas, when your diaper pail is in one room and you're changing a diaper on a wiggly baby in another, most times the diaper just winds up in the closest trash can. So just buy some small cheap trash cans to put in different rooms and then empty them at the end of the day. There's only so much odor a diaper genie can hold and they only take special expensive trash bags. Save your money. Get some small trash cans and those little smell good bags to toss the smelly diapers.

Receiving blankets.

Receiving blankets from Amazon

3. You can buy a swaddler but you don't actually need it.

I know this might be a controversial statement, but honestly those swaddlers are really expensive and babies quickly outgrow them. You can do the perfect swaddle with a receiving blanket for a fraction of the price and just as much energy. You know how babies come all bundled up when the nurse brings them in from the nursery? Yeah, that's a really good swaddle that will give your snuggle bug the same coziness as an expensive swaddler.

Portable baby formula dispenser.

Portable baby formula dispenser from Amazon

4. You don't have to be fancy and get a Baby Brezza.

Honestly, I had never heard of a Baby Brezza until I had my youngest, so I'm assuming its a newer invention. They're certainly cool and also really expensive and unnecessary. These little doodads are like baby Keurigs but for formula. They hold powdered formula and water, you press a button and it supposedly perfectly mixes up a warm bottle of sustenance. The price tag on these things are about the same as a larger much more needed baby item, like a car seat-stroller combo. There have also been some concerns raised by pediatricians due to some bottles not getting enough formula added.

Take the guesswork out of it and just fill the bottles by hand. You can even put water in the bottles in advance and leave them out at room temperature and use a portable formula container to put premeasured scoops in. I know it's no Baby Brezza, but you'll be $200 richer and know exactly how much formula is going into your baby's bottle.

Bottle drying rack.

Bottle drying rack from Amazon

5. Your baby doesn't need fake grass to dry their bottles on.

Don't laugh, a fake grass bottle dryer is something that actually once sat on my kitchen counter. That's about all it did because I dang sure didn't use it for more than the first week. When you're sleep deprived, you want the easiest thing available and oftentimes that's the top rack of the dishwasher or the dish rack that's already on your countertop. The things we get suckered into buying is laughable sometimes. Besides it being esthetically pleasing, you don't actually need it and a regular bottle rack, in fact, works better because there are no removable trees holding the nipples.

Receiving blankets.

Receiving blankets from Amazon

6. Side eye anyone that says you need embroidered burp cloths.

Don't fall for it. Yes, purpose-made burp cloths can be super cute but they're literally used to catch baby puke. These things are too small to cover the area needed to prevent your back and shoulder from becoming a casualty of a little guy eating too fast. Remember those receiving blankets we talked about earlier? Yeah, they are much more absorbent and cover more of your body to spare you having to change clothes. Those flannel blankets are versatile. You can use them for swaddling, to cover a car seat or stroller, for burp cloths or even a clean area to change the baby on. There's no such thing as too many receiving blankets. I'll make it easy for you, grab a pack here.

NoseFrida.

NoseFrida from Amazon

7. Skip the bulb syringe and splurge on the NoseFrida.

The hospital will give you a useless bulb syringe that only the nurses know how to work, because I swear no matter how hard you squeeze the bulb you barely get anything out. Bulb syringes even come with many newborn essential sets. I'm sure they work, but they seem to take way too much effort for the little bit of mucus they pull out. Get the NoseFrida—yes, it's a little more expensive but it's worth it, even though it seems gross. I promise the hygiene filter that goes in the tube will spare you from getting baby boogers in your mouth. You can literally use that thing well into the toddler years until your little one learns to blow their nose. Can't speak highly enough of this thing and here's a link to it here.

Pack 'n' Play

Basic Pack 'n' Play from Amazon

8. Do you really need a Pack 'n' Play that turns into a rocket ship?

OK, maybe it doesn't turn into a rocket ship but some of those things are so outrageous that you might need to be a rocket scientist to put it together. Pack 'n' Plays are really convenient and a great investment for new parents, especially if you like to travel or have family out of state. You can use it so your baby can sleep in your bedroom until you're ready for the switch to sleeping away from your little one. Just try not to get distracted by all the bells and whistles and stick to the basics. A Pack 'n' Play with a bassinet is really all you need. It's much cheaper and you'll use the bassinet piece much longer than the ones that come with other parts.

Teething rings.

Teething rings from Amazon

9. Expensive teething jewelry is overrated.

Fancy teething jewelry is cute and has become quite popular lately, but babies don't really need it. They are perfectly happy with the normal water-filled teething rings or rubber ones that can be thrown in any diaper bag. They're tried and true, plus they're designed specifically for teething. While the jewelry is marketed for teething babies, doctors have warned that they're not safe enough to use for that purpose. Besides, having a baby is expensive enough, no need to add to it when you can pick up teething rings at just about any store for a reasonable price.

The idea that everything for babies has to be the most expensive top-of-the-line things is just marketing. When it comes down to it, babies need very basic things: a safe place to sleep, food, diapers and lots of love. Everything else is extra and you can be as extra as you'd like but it should never feel like it's a necessity. Your baby will love you whether you have the Baby Brezza or mix their bottles by hand, promise.


This article originally appeared on 9.16.22

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Woman featured in iconic Great Depression photo didn't know she was famous until 40 years later

Florence Owens Thompson later revealed she wished her photo had never been taken.

the great depression; Florence Thompson; Mona Lisa of the Great Depression; Mona Lisa; the depression; depression era
Photo by Dorothea Lange via Library of Congress
The woman from the famous Great Depression photo didn't know about her fame for 40 years.

It's one of the most iconic and haunting photos of all time, up there with the likes of Hindenburg, The Falling Soldier, Burning Monk, Napalm Girl, and many others. It's called simply Migrant Mother, and it paints a better picture of the time in which it was taken than any book or interview possibly could.

Nearly everyone across the globe knows Florence Owens Thompson's face from newspapers, magazines, and history books. The young, destitute mother was the face of The Great Depression, her worried, suntanned face looking absolutely defeated as several of her children took comfort by resting on her thin frame. Thompson put a human face and emotion behind the very real struggle of the era, but she wasn't even aware of her role in helping to bring awareness to the effects of the Great Depression on families.

It turns out that Dorothea Lange, the photographer responsible for capturing the worry-stricken mother in the now-famous photo, told Thompson that the photos wouldn't be published.

Of course, they subsequently were published in the San Francisco News. At the time the photo was taken, Thompson was supposedly only taking respite at the migrant campsite with her seven children after the family car broke down near the campsite. The photo was taken in March 1936 in Nipomo, California when Lange was concluding a month's long photography excursion documenting migrant farm labor.

the great depression; Florence Thompson; Mona Lisa of the Great Depression; Mona Lisa; the depression; depression era Worried mother and children during the Great Depression era. Photo by Dorthea Lange via Library of Congress

"Migrant worker" was a term that meant something quite different than it does today. It was primarily used in the 30s to describe poverty-stricken Americans who moved from town to town harvesting the crops for farmers.

The pay was abysmal and not enough to sustain a family, but harvesting was what Thompson knew as she was born and raised in "Indian Territory," (now Oklahoma) on a farm. Her father was Choctaw and her mother was white. After the death of her husband, Thompson supported her children the best way she knew how: working long hours in the field.

"I'd hit that cotton field before daylight and stay out there until it got so dark I couldn't see," Thompson told NBC in 1979 a few years before her death.

the great depression; Florence Thompson; Mona Lisa of the Great Depression; Mona Lisa; the depression; depression era A mother reflects with her children during the Great Depression. Photo by Dorthea Lange via Library of Congress

When talking about meeting Thompson, Lange wrote in her article titled "The Assignment I'll Never Forget: Migrant Mother," which appeared in Popular Photography, Feb. 1960, "I saw and approached the hungry and desperate mother, as if drawn by a magnet. I do not remember how I explained my presence or my camera to her, but I do remember she asked me no questions. I made five exposures, working closer and closer from the same direction. I did not ask her name or her history. She told me her age, that she was thirty-two. She said that they had been living on frozen vegetables from the surrounding fields, and birds that the children killed."

Lange goes on to surmise that Thompson cooperated because on some level she knew the photos would help, though from Thompson's account she had no idea the photos would make it to print. Without her knowledge, Thompson became known as "The Dustbowl Mona Lisa," which didn't translate into money in the poor family's pocket.

In fact, according to a history buff who goes by @baewatch86 on TikTok, Thompson didn't find out she was famous until 40 years later after a journalist tracked her down in 1978 to ask how she felt about being a famous face of the depression.

@baewatch86

Florence Thompson, American Motherhood. #fyppppppppppppppppppppppp #historytok #americanhistory #migrantmother #thegreatdepression #dorthealange #womenshistory

It turns out Thompson wished her photo had never been taken since she never received any funds for her likeness being used. Baewatch explains, "because Dorothea Lange's work was funded by the federal government this photo was considered public domain and therefore Mrs. Florence and her family are not entitled to the royalties."

While the photo didn't provide direct financial compensation for Thompson, the "virality" of it helped to feed migrant farm workers. "When these photos were published, it immediately caught people's attention. The federal government sent food and other resources to those migrant camps to help the people that were there that were starving, they needed resources and this is the catalyst. This photo was the catalyst to the government intercepting and providing aid to people," Baewatch shares.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

As for Lange, Migrant Mother was not her only influential photograph of the Great Depression. She captured many moving images of farmers who had been devastated by the Dust Bowl and were forced into a migrant lifestyle.

"Broke, baby sick, and car trouble!" is just one of her many incredible photos from the same year, 1937.

She also did tremendous work covering Japanese internment in the 1940s, and was eventually inducted into the International Photography Hall of Fame and Museum and the National Women's Hall of Fame.

the great depression; Florence Thompson; Mona Lisa of the Great Depression; Mona Lisa; the depression; depression era Families on the move suffered enormous hardships during The Great Depression.Photo by Dorthea Lange via Library of Congress

Thompson did find some semblance of financial comfort later in life when she married a man named George Thompson, who would be her third husband. In total, she had 10 children. When Thompson's health declined with age, people rallied around to help pay her medical bills citing the importance of the 1936 photo in their own lives. The "Migrant Mother" passed away in 1983, just over a week after her 80th birthday. She was buried in California.

"Florence Leona Thompson, Migrant Mother. A legend of the strength of American motherhood," her gravestone reads.

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Communication expert shares 3 simple 'power moves' to not take criticism personally

“If I hear something that’s offensive, I’ll be like ‘okay, that’s trash.’ In my mind, I grab it with my right hand…and throw it.”

jefferson fisher, conversation, conversation tips, communications expert, podcast, jefferson fisher podcast, winning an argument
Photo credit: Canva

Standing your ground in a peaceful way is possible.

Even the most skilled small talkers among us might struggle when receiving negative feedback that feels like a personal attack. The temptation to fight back or stonewall is understandably strong. Our darker emotions become ignited, which sets off rejection stories in our mind before any clear thinking can take place.

The result: we dish out the same energy we’re given. Or, we shut down completely. Either way, we don’t get a lot accomplished.

But personal injury attorney and communications expert Jefferson Fisher, who shares all kinds of simple conversation tips, argues that keeping your cool in these heated moments all comes down to three “power moves.”

During a clip of his Jefferson Fisher podcast, the conversation guru first offered up a handy visualization: during moments of facing criticism, he imagines a giant trash can next to him, which collects all the negative feedback. He then “sifts” through the words, separating any snark as “trash” to get to what’s actually worth responding to.

“If I hear something that’s offensive, I’ll be like ‘okay, that’s trash.’ In my mind, I grab it with my right hand…and throw it.”

Dumping Trash Daniel Labelle GIFfrom Dumping Trash GIFs

That concept alone might be enough to avoid getting your feathers ruffled in many sticky situations. But below are the three easy strategies that can go a little further when someone is being offensive.

Power Move #1: Silence

Not saying anything after getting a snarky comment gives the other person the chance to take in their word choice, which Fisher argues often prompts them to apologize on their own.

“You’ve just exposed instead of covering it up…If you just let that silence sit there, oftentimes they go ‘sorry I shouldn’t have said that.’”

Power Move Strong GIFfrom Power Move GIFs

Power Move # 2: Acknowledge that the feedback could be true, rather than that it is

In these instances, Fisher encourages saying “Maybe you’re right,” which embraces humility without being a doormat.

Power Move #3: Holding off on the timing

In other words, this means not responding when you are angry and triggered.

To initiate a later time, Fisher suggests saying something like, “Let’s have this out…I don’t really have my thoughts together on that. Why don’t we talk about that at noon tomorrow?”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Fisher added the caveat that context about who this person is in your life will determine which of these steps you might take. Overall, the main goal stays the same: asserting your value while steering the conversation towards what’s actually productive to discuss. No fighting back required.

You can find more cool tips just like this one on Fisher’s YouTube, Instagram, and TikTok.

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In an iconic 1975 clip, a teenage Michael Jackson stuns Cher during hypnotic robot dance duet

The clip marks a turning point in Michael Jackson's iconic public persona.

jacksons, michael jackson, robot dance, Cher, 1970s TV
via Cher/YouTube

Cher and The Jackson 5 doing the robot dance.

One of the most distinctive aspects of Michael Jackson's mega-stardom was that he grew up almost entirely in the public eye. He began performing with his brothers at age five and remained a significant figure in American pop culture until he died in 2009.

He burst onto the scene as a child with an incredibly soulful voice. He became an electrifying performer as a teen before rocketing to superstardom at 20 with the release of his first solo album, 1979's Off the Wall. One of the pivotal moments when the public witnessed this transformation came in 1975, when 16-year-old Michael performed with his brothers, The Jackson 5, on The Cher Show.

The Jackson 5 and Cher performed a medley of the band's biggest hits, including "I Want You Back," "I'll Be There," and "Never Can Say Goodbye." But the most memorable moment came when Michael and his brothers broke into the robot dance during "Dancing Machine," and Cher did her best to keep up.

The Jackson 5 and Cher do the robot dance

It's fun watching Cher try to fall in line with the Jacksons, while Michael absolutely kills it, gyrating like an animatronic on hyperdrive during his solo.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

The Jackson 5 may have helped bring the robot dance into the public consciousness by incorporating it into performances of their 1973 hit "Dancing Machine." But it traces back to mechanical "mannequin" dances from the early days of film. In the 1960s, Robin Shields, a popular mime, performed as a robot on late-night talk shows. By the 1970s, dancers had set those moves to music on shows such as Soul Train.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

In a 2003 interview, Cher said she had to learn the moves on the fly from the Jacksons.

"Think of how hard it was for me to learn to do that, and the guys just knew how to do it. I've been working all day, and they just came on and said, 'Okay, sure, this is how you do it,'" Cher recalled. "I had a lot of fun on that show. It was a lot of work, but I had a lot of fun. You know, and I got to work with some great people."

What's also notable about the performance is that Michael's voice had changed, and he sang in a deeper register than he had as a child a few years earlier.

Things changed for Cher and the Jacksons in 1976

By the following year, things had changed for both The Jackson 5 and Cher. Cher reunited with her ex-husband, Sonny Bono, for The Sonny and Cher Show, which ran until 1977. In 1976, The Jackson 5 left Motown Records for Epic Records and changed their name to The Jacksons. Jermaine Jackson temporarily left the group to pursue a solo career, and he was replaced by his brother, Randy.

Here's The Jackson 5's complete performance on The Cher Show from March 16, 1975:

- YouTube www.youtube.com

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Joy

The two ways people who may not be naturally funny can show they have a great sense of humor

A great sense of humor is one of the most likable traits a person can have.

man luaghing, woman laughing, laughing on date, wine, happy couple
via Canva/Photos

A man and woman laughing on a date.

A sense of humor is often ranked among the most desirable traits in a romantic partner, with women rating it higher than men. Studies show that, in heterosexual relationships, the more times a man tries to be funny and the more a woman laughs, the greater the chance that the woman is interested. If a couple laughs together, the greater the chance of true love.

Why is a sense of humor so attractive? It makes people more enjoyable to be around, helps people bond, and makes awkward or even painful moments more bearable. On a deeper level, humor is a great way to determine whether someone is a creative thinker with a novel approach to solving problems.

But what about people who aren't comfortable cracking jokes and don’t have their brains constantly tuned to the “be witty” channel? Vanessa Van Edwards, a communications expert and author of Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People, says there are two ways to show they still have a great sense of humor.

@vvanedwards

Is Humor More Attractive Than Looks? | @The Diary Of A CEO

Van Edwards shared her thoughts on an episode of the Diary of a CEO podcast. During the podcast, she noted that there are two roles people can play in a conversation: a driver and a passenger. The driver is the person steering the conversation, while the passenger is along for the ride.

How do people who aren’t great at cracking jokes show they have a sense of humor?

1. Be a great laugher

"So, you are going to be the best passenger ever. You're going to laugh at the joke. You're going to bang on the table. I love table bangers. You know, I have people in my life who are not very funny, but they love to bang on the table when I tell a funny joke, and that makes me feel so good. They don't need to be funny. I'm happy to try. Right? So, if you're not funny, just be very good at hyping up other funny people."


2. Be a great curator of humor

"You also could be a curator of funny. You find the best funny gifts. You find the best funny clips. You share the best funny posts. Like, you don't have to be funny to be a curator of funny. Like, I have a friend who's not that funny, but he has the best clips and memes that he sends me. And so I think of him as funny even though he's never told a joke."

Watch the entire segment here.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Van Edwards added that if people genuinely want to improve their sense of humor, they can take an improv class to learn how to be funny in the moment. “A lot of humor is just trying things and seeing if they land. So if you're not funny and you want to be and like something good to work on, take an improv class and work on being funny on stage.”

Van Edwards' advice is excellent for those who thought they would never be seen as funny. Her words are a great reminder that even though many great communicators seem to have talent that comes naturally, it's a skill set, and like anything else, there are always ways to learn and improve.

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Fascinating 'Dark-fly' experiment has finally allowed scientists to measure evolution in real time

The long-running experiment has tracked changes in over 1,500 generations of fruit flies since 1954.

science, scientists, evolution, adaptation, mutation, genes, DNA, fruit flies, humans, health, futurology
By André Karwath/Wikimedia Commons & Photo credit: Canva

An experiment running since 1954 has taught scientists valuable information about how evolution really works.

Evolution usually occurs so slowly that it's imperceptible to the naked eye. Simple adaptations can take thousands of years to take hold, far too long for any of us to notice. But just because it's slow doesn't mean it's not happening. Humans, for example, aren't growing wings or gills (as far as any of us can tell), but we are evolving "faster than ever before," mostly in subtle ways such as food tolerance, disease resistance, and brain size.

One fascinating project that was started decades ago has allowed scientists to track and measure evolutionary changes in real time by speed-running evolutionary adaption in a heavily controlled lab setting.

In 1954, Japanese ecologist Syuiti Mori launched what would become one of the longest-running active experiments in the world. He enclosed a colony of fruit flies in glass bottles, covered them with cloth, and placed them in complete darkness.

They would remain there for the next 72 years and counting.


science, scientists, evolution, adaptation, mutation, genes, DNA, fruit flies, humans, health, futurology Dark flies and wild fruit flies look almost identical, but have significant genetic differences. Photo by Luke Peterson on Unsplash

Fruit flies are often used in this type of research because they reproduce incredibly quickly. Eggs typically hatch into maggots within a day or two. Within two weeks, they mature into sexually active adults that begin mating and laying eggs. New generations can cycle rapidly, which makes fruit flies the perfect candidate for tracking genetic changes over time.

Perhaps more surprisingly, fruit flies actually share quite a bit of DNA with humans. Researcher Stephanie Mohr tells Harvard Health that fruit fly genes are about 60% similar to human genes, with even greater overlap in disease-related markers. That makes them a surprisingly effective model for studying human genetics at a simplified level.

Mori's flies bred in complete darkness, rapidly producing generations that had never seen the light of day. Today, the experiment continues under successive generations of leading researchers, during which the colony has produced more than 1,500 generations.

Researchers access, feed, and study the flies using a weak red light that the flies cannot detect. For decades, they've been able to perfectly control the conditions from generation to generation. The Genetics Society of America writes: "The stock of flies has now spent more than 1,500 generations without light. In human terms, that would be like sequestering generations of our ancestors in the dark for 30,000 years."

Adaptation is slow, but that is more than enough time to measure changes, if any occur.


science, scientists, evolution, adaptation, mutation, genes, DNA, fruit flies, humans, health, futurology The project has been passed down from researcher to researcher for 70 years. Photo by CDC on Unsplash

The research team quickly discovered that after several generations, the new variety they had created, fittingly called "Dark-fly," performed better in darkness than wild flies.

The two subspecies look nearly identical, but the Dark-fly has longer head bristles used for sensory perception, a stronger sense of smell, and a tendency to lay more eggs in dark conditions.

Researchers even created mixed colonies of wild flies and dark flies, allowing them to interbreed in darkness, and found that Dark-fly DNA was more likely to be passed on to future generations.

In 2012, the full genome of the Dark-fly was sequenced by Naoyuki Fuse, who had taken over the project a few years earlier.

According to Bioedonline.org, "Fuse and his colleagues sequenced the dark-fly genome, identifying 220,000 single-letter differences in its DNA and several thousand larger DNA insertions or deletions, compared with a normal fruit-fly strain."

The team was able to pinpoint which genes changed over time and how, offering rare insight into how evolution works.

Scientists are quick to note that living in darkness does not directly cause changes in the flies' DNA. Instead, natural selection favors mutations and traits that help the flies thrive, making them more likely to be passed on to future generations. Some differences may simply be due to random chance, or genetic drift.


- YouTube www.youtube.com

Adaptations in extreme environments have been observed before. Some insects, including bedbugs, are becoming resistant to pesticides. The Mexican tetra, also known as the blind cave fish, has lost functional eyesight after generations of living in pitch-black caves. And a number of animals have adapted to rapidly warming climates.

But recording and measuring these changes in a controlled laboratory environment is extremely rare. Outside the Dark-fly experiment, other long-running studies have tracked colonies of E. coli and yeast under various conditions. But there's something incredibly exciting about observing a living, breathing species as it rapidly adapts to thrive in unnatural conditions.

One day, studies like this one could help scientists rewire human brains and genetics to protect against disease, among other amazing applications.

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